Roy's eyes went wide at the time his cheeks turned a deep crimson. The computer was one of Hohenhiem's latest inventions, and Roy's new favourite and essential gadget, for it did all his work for him. But today, Roy had used the computer for something other than doing his work.
He'd gone on , an amazing site where people submitted their artwork for the world to see. But what he'd found hadn't been art, it'd been madness! He was too embarrassed to talk about it, but at the same time...Roy was fascinated.
There were millions of pictures of him! That wasn't the worst part though...there were pictures of him and Ed...doing things to each other. Bad things. Things that made Roy really uncomfortable...and curious at the same time. He'd never noticed Ed's muscles before. Or the way his automail made him look so damn sexy. Roy was both impressed and disgusted.
"Colonel, what are you doing?" asked Riza suddenly from the other side of the room. Roy blushed even more, but managed to smile normally.
"Nothing at all, Lieutenant. I'm only doing my paperwork, like usual."
Riza's eyes narrowed in suspicion, and she was at the Colonel's side in an instant, staring at the screen. Her mouth hung open. "What is the meaning of this?!"
"It's nothing!" Roy replied quickly, minimizing the window. But Riza had already seen. She took the mouse from him and went back to deviantART. After fifteen minutes, she turned the computer off and allowed her gaze to slowly settle on Roy. He took a step back instinctively and grinned innocently at her.
Without saying another word, she walked over to the window, opened it and screamed at the top of her lungs, "MUSTANG IS MIIIIIINE!!!!!!! SO STOP THE EDxROY FANART, STUPID FANGIRLS!! AND DON'T CALL THEM 'HOT' 'CAUSE THEY'RE NOT REAL PEOPLE, OKAY?!"
"Lower your voice, Lieutenant Hawkeye!"
"YOU SHUT UP, MUSTANG!" She turned around to shoot him a murderous glare, then resumed her task. "AND STOP DRAWING ME AND/OR ANY OTHER CHARACTERS NAKED! IT'S NOT NICE! BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY, REMEMBER: ROY IS MIIIIIIIIIINE!!!"
She took a deep breath and then closed the window. Fuery and Havoc were staring at her. Breda was looking at the floor. Mustang was pretending to be doing some extremely important task on the computer.
"You will give that computer back to Hohenhiem, Colonel," instructed Riza. The Colonel nodded, too scared of the consequences of not doing as she said. "And I'm taking the rest of the day off, so goodbye."
"Wait!" Roy stopped her before she'd reached the door. He smiled sheepishly and blushed. "I was thinking...would you like...to go out for dinner tonight?"
"Have you finished your paperwork?" asked Riza sharply. Roy's smile disappeared. "I didn't think so. Now stop being lazy and get it done, Colonel!"
"Yes, Lieutenant. How about tomorrow night?"
"Only if you finish your paperwork." Roy's eyes lit up and he ran back to his desk, ready to get some work done.
"It's true; she really is the Colonel's babysitter," whispered Havoc once Riza was gone. The others nodded.