One day as I was awesomely walking down the street, when a little yellow bird pooped on my shoulder. "Hey!" I yelled whipping off my awesome new jacket. The little bird flew down and hovered by my head chirping, "Oh, I'm sorry mister." I just looked at the bird unimpressed. Then he said something that got my attention, "You seem like you're pretty awesome. Would you be interested in buying a life time of Awesome Sauce?" I just stared at him even more perplexed. "Wait you mean to tell me that you haven't seen the Advertisements for Awesome Sauce?" I shook my head no.
From the tiny briefcase the bird was holding he pulled out what looked to be some sort of contract. "Just sign on the dotted line and you'll be the most awesome, Awesome Sauce consumer ever!" I looked at the contract seeing too many words that had more than four syllables and just shrugged, signing the contract.
When I got home I was surprised to see that there was a giant box in my drive way that read Awesome Sauce! In big bold lettering. I t ran over to the box with a crowbar in hand tearing open the box. The first thing I spot is the technical directions, and warranty. I ripped up the technical directions and threw them a side saving the warranty. I picked up one of the bottles. The sauce its self was rainbow colored, and said on the bottle 'naturally flavored' which I didn't believe for a second. I sighed popping the top taking a swig of the multicolored concoction.
I started hacking and coughing as I tried to drink this un-awesome awesome sauce. I thought I would die for a minute it tasted so bad. I threw the bottle on the floor stepping on it. I figured I just call the manufactures of the stuff and complain, but then I realized I had already ripped up the directions which included the trouble shooting page that I needed. Face-palming, I grabbed the warranty hoping I could get a refund or something. After read the six page warranty and nearly dying of boredom, I found I could not get a refund and had to keep all of the lame sauce till I died.
The next day as I was walking the same way, that same little bird pooped on me again. "Really?!" I yelled wanting my anger to be obvious. The little bird flew near my head again apologizing. Then I got an idea. "Hey, I just found out I'm moving so can I change the address on my order?" the bird nodded and I wrote down an address. "Thank you!" I said. I happily walked back home smiling the whole way.
The next day I got a phone call from America yelling at me as to why his yard was filled with boxes that say Awesome Sauce all over them. I smiled and replied, "Merry Christmas and Happy Birthday for the rest of your life."
A/N: this is my first story and yes this is a school project that I just used hetalia in. a friend told me to post up here so i am. hope you liked my little crack tail~