Very short one-shot. Characters belong to Cassandra Clare. After Jem is gone, and Tessa is feeling a little low.
She could feel it. Like it was an actual physical thing, like if she were to look down there would be an actual hole in her chest; something to explain why it felt like all the air was being sucked out of her. A reason she felt everything and was numb at the same time. It didn't make any sense.
None of it did.
It was 3022. And she was somehow alone again. She was not alone, alone. She had their memories. She felt them. Her love for them was ever present. But it just felt…it felt so distant sometimes.
"Where are you?" She whispered to the wind "Where are both of you?"
She was getting so very good at saying goodbye.
Her boys. Both of them. Her loves. And both of their times had come and gone. And she was the lucky one, for she had gotten to love them both so fiercely. But right now…well right now, she felt so far from lucky. Right now she felt alone, and tired and old.
She could imagine Will saying something that would pull her out of this, something to make her smile. Jem would know the words to say that would warm her heart, to smooth away the loneliness.
Where are you?
How did it end up just being me? How did I end up alone? How did I end up here?
Magnus told her that the first one was the hardest…she thought it might be the last one. Knowing there was nobody else out there.
The only thought she found comfort in was they were together. The parabatai, reunited. The brothers, safe and at home.
It made her choke. How horribly she wanted to join them sometimes.