He gave Gaius a weak smile before stepping into his small room. He gently shut the door behind him and leaned against it. I am strong enough, he tell himself. Calm down. It's okay. Calm down, it's alright, Merlin chanted in his head. But this time it didn't seemed to work. His eyes burned and he could feel tears forming. He swallowed hard, trying to stop it. But it was futile. When the tears started, he gave up. A choked sob escaped from him and he sank to the floor. He pulled his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around them. He longed for his mother's arm to come and hug him. To convince him that it was okay and that the sun will shine again tomorrow. But she wasn't here. She wasn't there to hug his middle because she was too small to hug his shoulders. He was far away from home. He didn't even think he could see her again. Another sobbed came out, shaking his whole frame. He buried his head in his arms, muffling his crying; no one can know.
He was alone.