So today is the year anniversary since the first chapter of Shock of Friendship has been published. That story has evolved past a simple daydream into a complex universe that has become something so much more. So as a thank you here is a one shot, I think you'll like this one.
So have some wonderful holidays and read on.
"Are we there yet?" I ask through the darkness and hear the slight chuckle next to me as he laughs.
I can smell something like moss and forest, and the intangible scent of him. Like cinnamon and mint with an underlying scent, like the scent after a crack of lighting. My boots crunch underneath me with an unknown substance and the freezing breeze nips at the exposed skin of my face.
I think a couple hours back when I was talking with Eddie who wouldn't stop smiling like he had a secret. He kept looking at me with these sideways glances until he said with a laugh, "This better go well, you know. Me and The Captain made a bet. I got fifty bucks riding on this," I looked at him confused and he just pat my shoulder, "You'll know, and when you do shoot me a text, so I can collect my winnings," at that Barry walked in the precinct and beelined right for us.
Eddie grinned and pushed me towards Barry, "Have fun you two, and Makayle. You're going to love your present" before he winked and left. Barry watched me and told me he had a surprise but first I had to put this blindfold on.
And that's how we ended up here.
I huddle closer to Barry and his body heat seeps into my skin, and the underlying current of electricity buzzes through me. He has one hand on my arm to steer me around. We just got out of the car and he has taken my hand in his. He laughs softly and tightens his grip in reassurance, "Almost, Makayla. We're almost there," and I can imagine the grin that he has accompanying those soft words, "You're going to love your present," and I turn to him my face contorted in wonder as I imagine the glimmer in his emerald green eyes and the gentle curve of his mouth turned up in a smile.
We come to a gentle stop and I fall forward into him with a grunt, "Sorry," and he balances me again his hands lingering on my shoulder as he moves towards my back his breath whispering on my neck, sending goosebumps along my spine.
His hands come up to rest on my temples silently asking for permission, and he waits before pulling away the silk barrier.
I blink rapidly to get rid of the intense white that blinds my vision, but after a few more blinks I notice that it is still there and the world has come into sharp focus.
The white is everywhere and it sparkles in the light. It covers the round in a blanket and flutters down slowly from the sky.
I look in wonder my mouth wide open and watch as my breath curls away in white smoke, dancing in my vision before fading away.
Barry's heat is a welcome assurance as I bend down the crunch beneath my boots finally explained. The white flakes falling from the sky and I tilt my head back letting them softly land on my skin sending tingles. I stick my tongue out to catch one of the falling snowflakes the slight cold making me shiver as it melts.
The forest is covered in the beautiful snow and there are twinkling lights strung throughout the trees, their lights looking like stars brought down from the sky.
I whirl around to Barry to see him shuffling his feet as he softly smiles, "I remembered you saying that you've never seen snow, and thought that I could help that. So I found a clearing and made you your own little winter wonderland," he gives a sheepish chuckle and gestures to the lights, "May have gone a little overboard," and he clears his throat nervously balancing on the balls of his feet. He fixes me with his gaze his emerald eyes shining, "So, Merry Christmas," the words curl out of his mouth and I stand there frozen, my eyes burning warm.
He did this, for me.
And the next thing I know I've flung myself into him my head buried in his chest and his welcome warmth surrounding me as his arms wrap around my waist. I breath in his scent and feel a wide smile and say as sincere as possible, "Thank you, this is..." my mind goes blank trying to find the perfect word to describe this floating shifting in my stomach and the electricity buzzing through my skin. He wraps his arms tighter, "It is," and we both chuckle awkwardly.
He pulls me away from his chest his arms gripping me as he gives a mischievous grin, "Do you wanna build a snowman?" and I throw my head back in laughter.
"I wonder how long you've been waiting to say that," and he grins.
"Too long," and he grabs my hand in his, his long fingers curling around mine, and I feel a pang of sadness.
No matter how much I wish that he could ever like me back, his heart already belongs with Iris. And no matter how much it may hurt, I only want him to be happy. So I swallow the tears and paste a grin as he drives me into the center of the clearing in which lays some buttons, pebbles, two branches and a deep red scarf, just like his suit.
He turns to me and his hair falls into his eyes with the moisture as he grins childishly and points, "We'll need to start with the body first, come on," and I awkwardly dig my fingers into the snow grabbing some and crushing it in between my hands in an attempt to create a ball, but it smashes in my grip the snow falling to the ground.
I hear a chuckle behind me and his telltale warmth as he grabs my hands in his his mouth near my ear, "Like this," and he helps me bend down and softly pack the snow in, his breath warm next to my neck as his hands guide mine, "You have to be gentle, but make sure to pack it tight," and he finishes clasping it between my palms. The cold nipping through the gloves I'm wearing. And he folds my hand back to reveal the small sphere resting in my hands.
And he chuckles, "Now we make it bigger," and I almost let out a whimper as that warmth goes away as he faces me his emerald eyes sparkling.
He takes the small ball from my grasp and starts to roll it in the ground his hands curling around it almost lovingly, and I watch the smooth grace shining through in every small movement he makes.
The curve of his biceps as they flex back and forth, his gentle slope of his back, and the look of pure concentration he has. His tongue peeking out from between his lips, and that ever present curve in his smile.
I give a small mental shake as I scold myself, "You can't. He doesn't like you, and falling for him will only hurt you more," but there is always that small persistent voice whispering in the back, "But that doesn't mean that you can't be his friend and enjoy his company. He's here with you, for you. So enjoy it," and I give a slight smile.
The ball grows between his hands as he rolls it back and forth in the snow until it is so big it reaches to right above his knees. He straightens up and wipes his forehead, "I think that's good for the body, don't you?"
"Yeah, I think it looks great," I say a little distracted and his forehead wrinkles in worry.
"Are you sure you're okay?" he says the curve of his smile turning down.
"Yeah, no, I'm fine, just peachy," I gather up some snow in my hands, "Let's get the middle done," and I continue to roll the ball hoping he can't see the hopeless love that I have for him, and I am met with confusion.
He shakes his head a little and his hair falls forward as he leans towards me to help, our hands brushing against each other as we pack the snow tight.
I lean towards him and tell myself it's just for the warmth.
Yeah right.
We finish the body in companionable silence and he heaves the ball onto the body. I pack more snow into the creases smoothing it over. And we stand back to admire our work.
"Starting to look better and better," he smiles and points at the head he already rolled, "Let's finish him up," and I watch in admiration as he expertly places the ball of snow on top, barely even showing how heavy it is.
Maybe the speedforce gives him strength as well?
We pack more of the snow in together sharing a grin over the top of the snowman, almost the size of Barry.
We gather the pebbles and we start on the smile. I make my side just a bit crooked with his curve and smile to myself. I place the buttons down in a line down the body. We both place the arms on separate sides and stand back to admire our work.
And we both sheepishly grin as we realize what we forgot.
Barry turns his eyes sparkling, "I forgot the nose," and there's a gust of wind blowing my hair back as he flashes back and appears a bright orange carrot in his hands.
"Got it," and he puts it in the middle of the head right above the pebbles.
I jump up and gently shove him away, "Wait, I wanna do something," and I snatch the scarf from the snow going forward. I move my body to hide it from his sight and shift a few of the buttons.
This one left, a little up to the right and perfect.
Then I wrap the scarf around the neck draping it down the red lying next to the buttons, and I step back to let him look.
He chuckles lightly and turns to grin at me, his lips curved just a bit crookedly. And his jade eyes glimmer as we both look at the snowman.
Sporting a deep red scarf and in the center of it's body the pebbles zigzag to form a lightning bolt, I feel so proud.
Barry wraps his arms around me again and I feel the warmth seeping into me and the buzzing beneath my skin once more. I try to shift my foot so I can get a little closer and find myself landing in the snow on top of Barry shock registering on both of our faces before we both break out in bouts of laughter.
He raises an eyebrow at me as I roll off of him onto my back, the snow forming a cushion of softness. I link my hand with his and start to move it up and down my legs scissoring the snow in time and his grip tightens as he does the same. Both of us moving together connected by the interlinking of our fingers. I lay there in silence looking at the brilliant white of the clouds in the sky and the large trees surrounding us. The lights twinkling between the branches. Barry notices me looking and gives a sheepish smile, "I wanted to make this just right, so I strung all of those lights...everywhere," and his voice rings beautiful in my ears. He continues, "Earlier this week I had the chance to save a couple. They were in a hostage situation and when I was able to save them they stayed behind to catch a bit of my time. They thanked me, and said that if there's anything I needed that I would just need to ask. Started listing things that they had and I kept trying to insist I didn't need it. But then they said that they had a cabin in the woods..." he pauses to gather his thoughts as his hand tightens around mine, "I immediately remembered you saying that you had never seen snow, and they noticed my pause. Insisted that I take the cabin for a weekend, said that I've saved this city and deserved a time to relax," I turn my head towards him and see the gentle smile gracing his mouth.
"You do deserve to relax. You've spent so long running around saving everybody that you forget about yourself sometimes," and he gives a gentle chuckle.
His gaze stares out at the sky, "You're always reminding me that I don't have to put others first, that I matter," he turns his head towards mine, his breath curling out in white smoke, "I wanted to find a way to show you how much you mean to me. So I took them up on their offer, and went a little overboard. But I just wanted to make it special," he admits sadly and he loosens his grip on my hand.
World why do you hate me so? I know I keep saying that I want him to be happy, but when he does these selfless things and I see him so happy and free. I can't help feeling that my heart is constricting inside my chest. If only.
But outside I chuckle, "Best thing I could have asked for. Where I lived we didn't have regular seasons. We had two seasons a year, sun for most of the year, and in the middle of summer, the monsoons would come. Thundering down, raining for days. The thunder clapping everywhere as lightning would strike the ground, the forks of light against the night would be so beautiful," and he grins. I continue the words spewing out, "At that time the scent would be everywhere, the burn of ozone just underneath the smell of rain and lightning. That insistent buzzing through your skin like a live wire. Kind of like when we're touching," I admit in a rush, and he chuckles.
"Speaking of home, do you ever wonder about Grayson?" he seems to struggle getting that out but he continues anyways, "I mean, if he were able to be cured. I know you still love him, and..." he breaks of in awkward silence and I swallow my hesitation.
"Sometimes yeah, but it's hard. I can't ever have him or be the same way," Because now I know you, "I mean if he were somehow magically cured, I don't think I could. So much has changed," I love him, but I'm not in love with him, "It's just I don't know if I can love him," Because no matter how much it hurts.
I love you.
I clear my throat awkwardly, the cold from the snow seeping in underneath me. So I shift just a bit closer to Barry.
Seriously, he's a space heater.
I take a breath and ask the question that's been biting at me for a while, "What about you and Iris?" and he sighs.
"Well I've known her basically my entire life. She's my best friend, my sister, my first love," and my heart constricts but I nod for him to continue. He stares at the sky some more, "I've only ever really known love with Iris. I don't think I would know for a while what I would feel for someone different, be confused for so long. But Iris is always an important part of my life, but I'm starting to learn she's not the only one" he finishes by looking at me. I try to cover up the sorrow I know is written on my face, and I start to chatter my teeth. He gives a small smile, "Are you cold?"
"Little bit, yeah," I answer truthfully the snow melting under my jacket and biting at the skin along my spine. He faces me as I snuggle closer huddling into his warmth. I turn my face up to his and see that I'm close enough to notice the small gold flecks scattered in his eyes, and the almost invisible freckles across the bridge of his nose. His mouth is near my forehead and if I were to shift up just a bit, we could have kissed.
I shake that thought from my head again. He likes Iris, you don't have a chance. But he still got this incredible clearing, and showed you snow for the first time in your life. The two sides of me war with each other. One insisting to at least tell him how I feel while the other keeps yelling at me he will never feel the same!
And I let out a small sigh.
"What's wrong," he turns and rests his weight on his elbow as he stares at me.
I curse my inner self and plaster another smile on my face, "Nothing is wrong, was just wondering about why you would do something like this...for me," I tell him a half-truth. I snuggle just a bit closer to him for the warmth, against his chest. I feel the shaking vibrations as he gives a small chuckle his arms wrapped around me.
"Why not, I wanted to do something special for you. And so I thought a snow dat-" he clears his throat with a shy smile, "Day, would be the perfect thing to show you how I feel," and he gently squeezes my hand in his with silent reassurance.
With that squeeze my heart constricts just a bit more and the breath is blown out of my lungs.
He looks at me again, "Do you want to check out the cabin? You seem a little cold," he gestures with his hands towards our bodies. I realize that in my quest to find warmth I had shifted closer to him until we were wrapped around each other, my body plastered to his.
I can feel the heat rising to my cheeks burning bright red and give an awkward nod before peeling myself away, losing that precious feeling of my body connected alongside his.
For the warmth, obviously.
At least that's what I tell myself.
He is already up and before I can protest he grabs me from the ground his arms threaded under my legs and his chest supporting my back, as I hang from his grip.
Bridal style.
His breath is warm near my neck as he whispers, "Hold on," and I'm reminded of all the previous times he had said that, as Red.
There is a rush of wind blowing and a flurry of snow blocking my vision as he speeds us through the clearing coming to a stop inside of a cozy and warm cabin.
He sets me down gently and turns away to some other corner of the cabin. I take the chance to look around, big fluffy blankets are strewn everywhere and tucked into a corner there is a small kitchenette.
But what really catches my attention is the majestic structure standing in the middle of the room. I gravitate towards the warmth as I marvel at the fireplace covering the expanse of a wall.
The brick brings a homey feel to the cabin and there's a mantle on top with pictures of the couple, they look so happy.
He's laid three layers of blankets in front of the fireplace and I sit down to watch the flames dance over the logs as they burn bright.
It's beautiful.
"I know right," his voice startles me as I turn to look at him and see two steaming mugs in his hands.
The aroma hits me, the sweetness of cocoa, the spice of cinnamon and a small hint of mint. I can feel myself salivating. He chuckles again and sits down as he hands me one of the mugs which I grasp tight in my hands grateful for the warmth.
I take a tentative sip and sigh at the burst of flavor that hits. The cocoa warms my body as the heat spreads through in tendrils heating up where the cold has bit and soothing it over.
The cinnamon leaves a pleasant taste as the mint finally shows up sending tingles up my spine at the crisp cleanliness compared to the chocolate.
Barry is watching me with a small smile and something unknown in his eyes as he fixes me with his gaze.
I huddle up in one of the hundreds of blankets bringing it around my shoulders as a figurative shield against my thoughts.
He looks ethereal in the firelight as it dances off of his skin bringing it to life with a glow that shines so bright. The fire darkens his eyes to jade and they seem bottomless with so many complicated emotions, I could drown in them. And his smile is highlighted the curve of his lips turned upwards as his eyes shine.
I am in so deep, stupidly in love with someone who can't love me back. Stupid, stupid, stupid!
He clears his throat as he wraps a blanket around himself, "So, I hope you enjoyed your present," and he looks into the fire as if it holds the answers to all of life's questions.
I stare at my mug, "It was amazing," you're amazing, "I finally got to see snow, made a snowman, snow angel. Drank the best hot chocolate in the world and we are sitting warm by the fire. Best I could ever ask for," Because I'm with you.
Tell him already! Just lean over and kiss him! My heart is yelling at me but my head is disagreeing.
Don't do it, you'll mess everything up.
Just do it.
Don't.
"Makayla," I hear softly and he's leaning closer the burning intensity in his eyes laced with something unknown as he stares at me, "I have to tell you, I-" he leans closer his lips just inches from mine.
Kiss him. My heart whispers silently.
I turn my head just a bit and I don't know who leaned in first, me or him. But his lips are soft against mine, that same gentleness that carries in everything he does.
His arms wrap around me and I tense waiting for him to push me away, but he tightens them and pulls me closer his mouth firm against mine as my heart does somersaults in my chest.
That same electric buzz is still there but with the connection it is intensified until it feels like live wire being fired through my veins, the energy racing through and warming every part of my body way better than the hot chocolate could have.
I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him closer trying to show him how I feel in everything I do. Pouring my soul into the connection of our lips and hoping that he will understand.
The static courses through me as I feel him pull away, my eyes snap shut and I see him his eyes burning jade as I finally determine that unknown element.
Want, affection, desire.
Love.
He grips me tight as I bury my head in his chest that warmth and lightning surrounded me. The fire burning in front of us and warming our skin.
He holds me close as he whispers against my neck, "I planned today to be close to you. Even though I thought you were still in love with Grayson, I wanted you to be happy. I wasn't sure if I could finally tell you how I feel, wanted to make it special. Even if it would have hurt," and my heart constricts again, but not with pain.
I chuckle, "I feel like an idiot," and he loosens his arms as I clutch the blanket he surrounded us in, "When we were talking about Grayson, I kept thinking about you. I didn't do anything because I thought you were in love with Iris, I wanted you to be happy, even if it wasn't with me," and he lets out a laugh as he holds me tight.
"Guess we both got it wrong, huh?"
"Yeah, guess so, but there is one thing I want to know," I say and look up at him, "Why go through all of this trouble, making the clearing. Blindfolding me and telling Eddie to keep me occupied. You planned this," and his gaze turns thoughtful.
"I just knew I wanted to do something special, thought that it would be nice for you to see snow. But it was for me to, while you were playing around and watching it fall with that open wonder in your eyes. I didn't care if you ignored me because I could sit back and watch you smile as you have fun," he tightens his arm around me and sighs, "And all the while, I was falling deeper in love with you," he admits with a low voice as his jade eyes glimmer with that darkness of love.
"Wow," and something hits me, "Does that mean Eddie knew?" and I'm hit with a revelation, "Eddie! This is what he was talking about," I reluctantly pull my hand away to find my phone and send a quick text.
You bet against the Captain on if me and Barry would fall in love! a few seconds later and my phone buzzes.
Not on if you fell in love, everyone already knew it was going to happen. We just bet on how soon. Captain said that you two would hide your feelings and take forever to realize. I knew that it would happen, soon. and he finishes the text with a smiley face and a wink. I roll my eyes as Barry laughs and holds me tight the fire dancing as it sings us to sleep.
A few hours later Barry is sleeping soundly his arms still wrapped around me tightening occasionally like he's afraid if he doesn't when he wakes up I'll be gone.
My phone vibrates again. I open it to see another text from Eddie. Won the bet, and I told you. I roll my eyes.
Told me what?
He answers quickly, I told you you'd love your present. I'm glad for you two, sleep well and I smile at my phone.
Cuddling up closer to Barry and in the warmth of the fire I couldn't feel happier. In the arms of the man I love, and surrounded by the magic of the snow that brought us together, I have one final thought before sleep claims me.
Best Christmas present, ever.
Thank you all for your wonderful support and have a wonderful day/night. Happy anniversary.