***Chapter One***
**Life & Death**
"A disease you got to be fucking kidding me. "
An incurable disease, to be exact.
It was like fate was making a mockery of her.
First laughing at her ability to read minds; second seeing her awestruck reaction at her first vampire, and nearly getting killed. Thirdly, said vampire rescues said telepath; and Finally finding out that you were going to die anyways without a psychopath to end it sooner.
She was a telepath she was weird already, but she also had to have an incurable disease to boot.
It wasn't cancer- she should be happy that it wasn't, but at least cancer could be treated through chemo. She didn't have that luxury.
Not even in her recent knowledge of vampire blood could heal her. It was a sad fact.
It was a disease- but it acted like a virus more then anything else. Killing her slowly.
She had found out days after Renee lenai/ Drew Marshall, whoever he was, had come after her with a shotgun threatening and almost succeeding to end her short life of twenty-two years.
The bruises- that marked her face and stomach weren't healing. Her muscles ached every waking minute, and she felt for most of her time, like she was going to go to sleep and never wake to see the sun's rays leak through her window.
The virus seemed to suck out all the energy that her body produced, like a vampire's fangs sucking the life's blood from her corroded.
Even speaking was pushing it.
She kept it to herself, however.
Being a telepath was considered ordinary.
But having a disease with no known cure would be considered monstrous.
She should tell Bill right?
It was a flat out "no" in her mind.
But,why?
Well, Bill had saved her life. Risking his own in pure daylight.
Wasn't that reason enough to trust in him?
Maybe, if she was a little more blonder.
After meeting Eric that first night, Sookie started to get suspicious of the vampire that called himself her 'boyfriend'.
The one reason, or explanation- that was washed clear into her mind- was on the first night she had met him. The Rattrays were vampire drainers, Bill had paid them to drain his blood- so that she could rescue him and introduce himself- but he also had neglected to be truthful about the time the Rattrays had beaten me within an inch of my life- for I had to suck Bill's blood.
From what little knowledge Sookie had of vampire's blood-is that if large quantities are consumed at a time the vampire can send feelings and adoration through a makeshift bond that was created.
She had a lot of time to think of Bill as a 'good' and a 'bad' vampire. It seemed like every time she had an encounter with Bill the dial kept leaning toward bad.
She hadn't realized that this virus could and would consume her life as it was currently. She felt weak- like weaker when she had been beaten to a bloody pulp- it was a struggle to walk. She somehow could manage it well, though.
It had been about a week since everything in Bon Temps had sashayed back to normal. Even her friends at Merlottes were coming to terms of actual vampires existing and are "coming out of the 'supposed' coffin". It was exhausting if she could be honest to herself. She couldn't keep up with the way her friends were feeling and their actions.
She just wanted to be herself and that was probably asking too much for the god that was watching over her. Her body felt tired and her thoughts often wandered to the what ifs.
What if my life ended? Who would miss me? Should I tell someone about my illness? What if I died? How would it affect other people around me? Did I want to die? What if I was a vampire...? She stopped her thoughts there.
Her thoughts always stopped there. It was unspeakable. Unheard of. Yet, not an impossible idea. And, it sure wasn't the worse way out.
Her decease was incurable. If she knew of a way to escape her problems of her mortal weaknesses shouldn't she go with it? And if she could be turned into a creature of the night her thoughts instantly shifted to him. The Viking she had denied due to Bill's blood dissuading her decision to become Eric's.
He had never lied to her. Never doubted her and believed in her. How did she know this? Well - just from how he had looked upon her and spoke to her spoke volumes of how the ancient vampire felt about her.
Her legs were barely able to stand upright - however being the stubborn blonde she was pushed through the pain and continued to walk on her own two feet.
Deciding that she could run on this idea.
She wouldn't hope, though.
She knew Eric cared about her, but how far did that caring nature extend?
How far did he care for her to turn her?