Snape's Mistake
"Another day," groaned Ron. "The bloody worst part of it is, it's only half of first term!" He and his best friend, Harry, were about to meet up with Hermione. She was sitting on the stone wall outside next to Ron's younger sister, Ginny. She did NOT look happy.
"'Lo, 'Mione," said Harry.
"Are you alright, Hermione?" asked Ron, as cautiously as he could. Hermione was acting angry all the time now, and as Ron had experienced the one time before, she also had a hefty kick and a damn good slugging arm. (He still had the bruises on his left ankle and left arm to prove that point.)
"I want to kill Snape," Hermione replied through gritted teeth. "He is a bloody arsehole."
Harry and Ron stood there, extremely puzzled, until Ginny said, "She went in to ask for help with that Visionary Potion thingamajig, and he actually tried to feel her up!"
"Bloody hell!!" said Ron. His fists clenched. Harry knew that Ron was in love with Hermione, but now he looked as if he wanted to run inside right then and slay Snape with his quill pen or something.
"Don't do anything rash, Ron, OK?" Harry said. "It's just Snape being a git again."
"Just?" Ron shot back. His face was turning red. "Snape sexually assaulted her, Harry!"
"He's got real problems," Ginny said. "He should be married."
"Who would want him?!" snapped Hermione viciously. "He's slimy, greasy…"
"Why Miss Granger," said the unmistakable slimeball voice behind them. "That is most unflattering." Snape glided up behind them most unpleasantly.
"I'm going to Dumbledore," said Ginny coolly. "You're not getting away with this." She left quickly in case Snape tried anything against her.
That was when Snape made his fatal mistake. He stroked Hermione's ass, saying, "A girl as lovely as you shouldn't go-" He didn't have time to finish.
Hermione hauled back and punched him in the face with perfect form.
"You bloody PERVERT!!" she hollered. "You will NOT touch me!!" She slugged him again and then kicked him in the balls.
Dumbledore, McGonagall, and the other teachers had arrived, but they had heard Hermione and didn't do anything. It looked as if they were actually enjoying what they were seeing. The students certainly were.
Then Ron decided he'd join in as well. He kicked Snape hard in the stomach, yelling, "I AM A WEASLEY!!! THAT MAKES ME SOMEONE AT LEAST, UNLIKE YOU!!!"
On the sidelines, Dumbledore leaned over to whisper in McGonagall's ear.
"Young Weasley has earned at least that, don't you think?" McGonagall nodded and returned to the fight.
Harry could not believe his eyes. Ron and Hermione were still beating the living crap out of Snape.
When they were finally done, it seemed as if Snape was a tad unconscious, for a few minutes, at least. When he got up, it looked as if an entire shelf of potion bottles had fallen on him. He was covered in bruises and small cuts from Hermione's charm bracelet.
"A cracking good fight," boomed Dumbledore, obviously not wanting to comment about the fact that it wasn't a fight – just a good ass-kicking. He rose from his seat. "But I must send all of you back to your classes. Professor Snape's Potions classes have the next few days off, while he heals up. Miss Granger, you have a cracking good punch! Mr. Weasley, I would have you on a team for fighting if we had one. Come on now, on with your day, everyone…"
THE END