I should be working on other chapters... But... I've wanted to do this for a while, and you all will be able to say hello again to the ...old... Shigen and Ryuk... The one from the future! Btw it's a Saturday for them~
"Hurry the fuck up you guys! I want to get there before nightfall!" Kai was not in one of his best moods, it went without saying. He was not happy because Link had decided to go camping on the same weekend the Star Trek marathon was on, which made Kai a very unhappy camper. Literally.
He threw his bag of stuff in the back of the borrowed jeep and then took his usual spot in the passenger's seat, doing up his seat belt and making sure a paper bag was close by in case he started hyperventilating, Link was never one of the best drivers in the world.
Shigen was the next one out of the house, bags in hand, a few bags actually... He made sure to pack his favorite blanket and several hundred clothes, because you do have to look good while out in the wilderness.
"It's not sexy's fault he's not a Trekkie..." Shigen said to a rather sleepy looking Ryuk, who was also coming along for the trip. "I'm not a Star Trek person myself..."
Ryuk simply nodded as both men placed their bags in the back of the jeep, they both took the back seat, Shigen on the drivers side and Ryuk on the passengers side.
Link was the last to leave the house, he had only one bag with him, a habit formed from having to pack lightly all the time. He threw his bag in the back and climbed into the drivers seat. "Everyone ready?"
There were several groans in response and Link took that as a yes and started the car.
"Wait! What about Seun! We can't leave her all alone!" Kai was already unbuckling his seat belt frantically at the thought of his dog being abandoned.
Link used the automatic lock system to trap him. "Don't worry Kai, Koal said he's going to look after her."
Kai sat back down in his seat with a huff and blowing some loose bangs out of his face. "Yeah, like that makes me feel any better..."
With a chuckle, Link put the car in drive and pulled out of the drive way.
As soon as they were on the main road, the fighting started.
"Shadow... Put the Country station on... I don't want to listen to that pop crap..."
"And there's no way I want to listen to your emo shit!"
"Can't you two just shut the hell up? I'm trying to sleep here."
Link's grip tightened on the steering wheel. There's no way I'm going to listen to this the whole way there. He reached for the radio and turned it off completely. "There, that solves everything."
Kai let out a rather threatening growl and crossed his arms. "I really hate camping! Why do we have to go?" He knew he sounded like a little kid, but someone had to complain.
"Kai, if you stop complaining... I'll give you all the sex you want." Link's eye was twitching, but he was telling the truth. If it will keep him happy... I'll just have to order Shigen and Ryuk away for a few hours or something.
The shadow seemed very pleased with Link's offer, his frown was now gone and quickly replaced with a wide grin. He settled back in his seat and closed his eyes for a nap.
But as it is always with Kai, he never stayed silent for long.
"This is the song that never ends~ Yes it really annoys my boyfriend~ I just, started singing it, not knowing what it was, and I'll continue singing it forever just because-"
"Kai, you can stop right there before I start driving reckless or something." Link's expression was defiantly funny which just made Kai laugh.
"You're so sexy when you're angry." Kai said, leaning over and kissing the still twitching hero on the cheek.
Link twitched again and forced a smile. "You're just lucky I love you."
Behind them, Shigen had his seatbelt off (a risk that's for sure) and was laying his head on Ryuk's lap, playing his PSP. This thing will be dead by the time we get there. The feeling of someone playing with his hair made him look up.
Ryuk was barely awake, he was gazing down sleepily at Shigen, there was a small smirk on his lips.
Ryuk has to be the cutest guy in the world. He quickly reached up and grabbed onto Ryuk's cheek. "Aw... Who's the most adorable guy in the world...?"
If Ryuk was asleep, he was awake now. He pushed Shigen's hand away from his face roughly and shoved the emo off his lap, dumping him in that place between the seats that is impossible to get out of.
"Don't pinch my cheeks you bastard! It hurts!"
Shigen flailed, trying to remove himself from the pit of hell, finally latching onto the seat and pulling himself up. Once he was situated he began the task of fixing his hair. "It's not my fault your cheeks are all cute and pinch-able."
"Okay guys, enough, it's only an hour drive to the camp ground." Link was trying his best to be a good driver, but the two in the back were distracting him.
Both Shigen and Ryuk went quite, not wanting to disturb Link's 'so far' good drive.
It was going to be a long hour.
When they finally pulled into the camp ground, three of the four were dead from boredom.
Link seemed cheerful though, he jumped out of the car with more than necessary enthusiasm and stretched. It was still early in the day, a beautiful day at that, and it only made him happier.
"Come on you guys, the quicker we get the tents up, the quicker you can laze around all day!" He kicked the jeep door to try and scare them into action, but he soon regretted it and hugged the jeep. "Oh my beautiful borrowed vehicle, I didn't mean it." He checked to make sure there was no damage, and luckily there was none.
Kai jumped out of the car and pounced on his boyfriend. "Tents you say?" He latched onto Link's ear with his lips, purring like a kitten.
"Not that kind of tent!" Link's face turned red. Leave it to Kai to say something like that...
Shigen was next out of the car, he made sure to give Link and Kai both a 'save it for later' look before reaching into the car and dragging Ryuk out by the arms.
"Come on Ryuk, we have to get the tents up..."
"That's sick man, why is your head always in the gutter?" Ryuk grumbled out, picking himself up off the ground and brushing the dirt off. "I mean, if it's not you, it's Kai, and if it's not Kai, it's you."
Link opened up the trunk and pulled out a tent bag, he bopped Shigen over the head with it before handing it to him. "Let's ponder the mysteries of men later." He retrieved the other tent from the car and handed it to Kai.
Kai rolled his eyes before walking off with the tent to find a good place to set up. The answer is simple. Life is more interesting when you're perverted.
It didn't take them long to find a place to make camp. The campground was called 'Hyrule's Field of Fun' for a reason, the whole area was flat.
Link and Kai's tent went up first, which was no surprise since the two were expert campers.
But Ryuk's and Shigen's tent looked like it had eaten too much for supper and then got run over by a truck. It was only half way up and some of the poles were sticking out in awkward angles.
Kai bounced over to them. "You guys suck ass at setting up tents." He was about to offer help, but Ryuk gave him a glare that the devil would be proud of so he stayed put.
Ryuk yanked at a spike that was holding a pole in the ground. "I'm sorry for not being great outdoors men like you." He would have said more, but the feeling of something gently landing on his leg distracted him.
He looked down and screamed.
Shigen whacked himself in the face with a rebel pole, Ryuk had scared him so badly he had pulled the thing out of the ground faster then intended.
"It's a grass hopper! Get the creepy green alien bastard off me!" Ryuk was hoping around the place, doing 360's and then falling to the ground where he rolled over a few times.
Link came to sit down beside Kai, leaning on his shadow and watching the show, trying not to laugh his ass off.
Shigen was still rubbing his cheek when Ryuk crawled over to him, a look of desperation in his eyes.
"Is the bastard gone?"
Shigen was about to tell him no, but Kai beat him to it.
"Naw, he's on your ass now, and he looks hungry... Not in the good way either."
This answer prompted a few more girly screams, and a couple more flips before Shigen was able to grab a hold of the sputtering and cursing Ryuk. "It's okay love... the bad grass hopper is all gone... you killed him..."
Ryuk let out a sigh of relief and relaxed completely into Shigen's arms. "Serves the evil little fucker right."
On the grass, Link and Kai were rolling around laughing their asses off.
Ryuk acknowledged them just long enough to give them the finger before indulging himself in the emo's embrace.
Link was the first to compose himself, he stood up, still wiping the tears from his eyes. "Okay you guys, lets get your tent up and then we can do something fun!"
Shigen raised an eyebrow. "Fun sexy...? Like what are you suggesting...?"
"Well, there's a lake not far from here, I was thinking we could go for a swim!" The thought almost made Link jump up and down for joy, he loved the water.
Kai shivered and swatted at a fly that had been feasting on him. "I hate water though! And look at those clouds! It could be dangerous if it starts thundering and lightening while were in the water."
Link looked up at the 'clouds' and face-palmed. "Kai, those are barely even clouds!"
"Fine, fine, we'll go swimming then hunny."
Link hugged his boyfriend. "I knew you loved me Kai."
The boys spent the next twenty minutes trying to untangle the mess that Shigen and Ryuk had made, then they spent another ten minutes trying to build the thing properly.
"Never again sexy..." Shigen said to Link who was standing outside. He was inside putting his swim shorts on and trying not to fall on his ass. "I haven't left the city in 15 years... I am no good out in the country..."
Ryuk (who was also inside the tent) nodded in agreement.
Kai skidded over to Link in his swim shorts, grabbing a handful of the elf's ass before booking it towards the lake, laughing like a maniac.
He's lost it... Link didn't react to the groping at all, he just stood there watching his shadow go ran off like the devil was on his ass.
Shigen and Ryuk both stepped out of their tent all geared up for swimming and ready to go.
Well Ryuk look a bit uncomfortable be half naked, but Shigen didn't mind.
"I believe shadow has lost it... more so than before..." He patted Link gently on the shoulder as if to comfort him.
"I think it's the school thats messing him up." Link said as they started towards the lake. "I hope no one's been giving him drugs and telling him they're candy, Kai's dense enough to believe it."
"Would you all hurry the hell up! Turtle speed is not attractive!" Kai waved at them from afar before turning around and disappearing over the hill.
Link didn't mind going faster, he couldn't wait to get in the water, so he started jogging after the shadow, leaving Ryuk and Shigen to lazily walk to their destination.
"Damn, why does it have to be so sunny today?" Ryuk said while covering his eyes to block out some of the light. "Do you ever find it hurts your eyes Shiwi?"
Shigen tried not to cringe upon hearing his nickname. "Yeah... It hurts my eyes as well..." If Kai ever found out about the whole 'Shiwi' thing... I would never hear the end of it.
At the top of the hill, the lake was fully visible, and it was pretty big too, it could almost be a beach.
Shigen spotted Link and Kai further away from the crowd of people, Kai was wielding something that was questionable at this point. It was long and blue....
"Should we go see what those idiots are doing?"
Shigen looked at his boyfriend, and then looked back at the two elves. "Would you kill me if I said yes...?"
"Engard Link! Take that!"
There was a loud smack followed by a yelp.
"Kai! Stop hitting me with your noddle!" Link blocked the next blow and tried to grab the thing out of Kai's hands.
"It's not my noddle, it's some kids noddle! I stole it!" He whacked the hero over the head again, loving the weird slappy sound it made.
"You stole a kid's noddle? You truly are evil Kaiten." This time Link managed to grab the weapon from Kai. Now the tables were turned, Link held the noddle like he would a sword and prepared for a counter attack.
Kai knew he was screwed unless he thought of something quickly, he back away from Link. "You wouldn't hurt your boyfriend would you Link?" He batted his eyelashes.
"It didn't stop you."
Kai gave his infamous puppy pout. "So you're gonna beat me to death with your noddle!"
Link waved the noddle from side to side. "That I am." He charged at the shadow with a battle cry.
Kai screamed and ran the opposite way, trying not to trip and fall on his face.
Link quickly caught up to him and began beating him over the head unmercifully.
"Oh dear Goddesses! I give! I surrender!" Kai was on the ground now, trying to cover his face and his lower sensitive areas, it wasn't working well.
"Would you two stop molesting each other with your noddles please...?"
Shigen chose the wrong moment to join the conversation, because before he could blink, Link was attacking him.
"Take this you emo!"
Shigen was standing there looking at Link with a blank expression on his face. The attack wasn't fazing him at all. "Are you done yet sexy...?"
Link paused for a moment and then gave him another whack on the head. "Now I am."
Kai crawled his way over to Ryuk and hid behind his legs. "Holy snap, crackle, and pop! That was intense."
Ryuk was standing a little bit behind Shigen, watching everything with a twitching eye. "You guys are fucked."
A little kid who looked to be about five ran over to them.
Link was about to ask if he needed anything when the kid suddenly grabbed the noddle and hit the hero over the head with it.
Link was too stunned to do anything, and he watched as the kid ran back over to his mother, giving them all the middle finger as he ran.
Kai giggled as Link began rubbing his sore cheek. "What's the matter Link? Were you defeated by a child?"
Link huffed and turned away from him, giving Shigen the opening he needed.
He charged at the elf and picked him up, flinging him over his shoulder.
Once again, Link was too stunned to do anything, but he was soon brought out of his daze as the ice cold water splashed him. "I have to get used to it first Shigen! I's too cold to just jump-"
He was cut off as Shigen dumped him into the water, the emo almost laughed when Link resurfaced, flailing like crazy, but the happy feeling was soon gone when a very cold Link jumped onto him.
Both the emo and sexy fell into the water with a large splash.
Link was the first to get his bearings straight, cursing and swearing he clumsily ran to the shore, not stopping to see if Shigen was still alive. But Shigen wasn't far behind him, he was making funny noises and running as fast as he could, which really wasn't fast at all.
Ryuk and Kai both laughed at their shivering and wet boyfriends as they climbed back on shore. They laughed ever harder when they got covered in sand because of said shore.
Link rolled onto his side and looked at Shigen who was laying on his stomach, both of them were panting heavily. "What a failure that was."
Shigen turned his head so that he was looking at the hero, one side of his face was coated in sand. I have sand in very uncomfortable places right now... "Yeah... I think that was not one of my smarter ideas..."
They could hear the other two laughing at them. Shigen's eyes lit up. "I think I have a better idea this time..."
Link smirked, they were defiantly thinking the same thing.
Both men stood up and ran toward their ukes.
Ryuk was the smarter one, he ran and almost got a few steps away before he was snatched up and carried of towards the water.
Kai was not so smart. He ran toward the hero with the intention of getting a sand hug before he was hoisted over a shoulder and carried away.
Once they were far enough in the water, Shigen and Link both tried to throw their boyfriends, but they ended up falling in too.
The result was a bunch of flailing arms, curses, unidentifiable noises, and more cursing.
"My balls are freezing off! Move out of the way emo, before I kill somethin!" Kai was trying so hard to get out but Shigen kept blocking his path to the shore.
Ryuk was having the same trouble trying to get past Link. "You stupid -
CRASH!
All the madness stopped.
The guys all looked up at the sky with fearful expression on their faces.
Kai was the first to speak as always. "Dude... Did god just sensor you?"
Ryuk covered his mouth with a little whipper. "I'm sorry!"
There was a bright flash of lightning and everyone except Shigen screamed.
"Barely even clouds Link?" Kai floated over to him and flicked his forehead. "Now we're all gonna die thanks to you!"
Shigen calmly picked up Ryuk bridle style and walked toward the beach. "It's going to start pouring rain in a second... come on...."
"Come on Kai." Link said while standing up, he was about to walk back to shore when a tug on his shorts stopped him.
He looked down to see Kai holding his arms toward him as if to say 'pick me up!'"
Link shrugged and picked the shadow up the same way as Shigen had done, and carried Kai all the way back to camp.
"So how long is the fucking rain gonna last emo?"
All four guys were currently cuddling in Link and Kai's tent, they were out of their swim shorts and now in their pajamas, trying to get warm. The sound of the rain hitting the tent was almost deafening, and every few minutes there would be a flash of lightening, followed by a clap of thunder.
"It should last for a few minutes..."
Kai rested his head on Link's shoulder and sighed happily. "Okay, what do we do until then?"
Ryuk was sitting in Shigen's lap with a blanket wrapped around him, he hated the cold the most. "I say we sleep." He yawned loudly to make his point.
Shigen grabbed his PSP from the side of the tent. "I say we all stare at Zack's ass..."
Ryuk elbowed him in the stomach.
"I say we make out."
All of them looked at Link with wide eyes.
Link ducked his head and blushed. "What? It was just a suggestion."
Kai kissed his cheek. "I have an even better idea!"
Shigen rolled his eyes, he knew what was coming.
"We should play Truth or Dare!"
Three of them groaned in unison.
Kai shook Link gently. "Come on! It will be fun! Link goes first, truth or dare hero?"
Link did not want to play this game, he heard it was scary, but what could you do... He'll probably dare me to run around outside naked or something... "Both options are equally terrifying, but I'm going with dare this time."
Shigen covered his mouth.
Kai laughed evilly. "I was hoping you'd pick that, I've been wanting to see this forever!"
Link gulped loudly.
"I dare you to make out with emo for a whole minute!"
There was a bright flash and a loud clap of thunder, making all of them jump.
"Kai, I am NOT making out with Shigen, that would be like kissing... my... brother..." He looked at Kai who could have passed as his twin, even though they weren't related in any way. "What do we have going on anyway? Is this some weird form of narcissism? Or some twisted form of masturbation?"
Kai tilted his head. "Maybe so.... Wait! Don't try to talk your way out of this one! Go make out with emo now!"
Shigen didn't move his hand from his mouth. "Don't I get a say in this...?"
"Nope~"
"Fine then, let's get this over with sexy..." Shigen tried his best to ignore the glare Ryuk was giving him as he crawled over to Link.
Link's face was completely red, he really didn't not want to do this.
Shigen took control, knowing Link wasn't going to move first. He grabbed the hero's shoulders and leaned in.
Kai was almost jumping with joy. Now all Link/Shigen fans will be happy!
Link found it was very hard to enjoy a kiss with someone who was not your boyfriend, but Shigen just happened to be an amazing kisser, when Shigen began caressing his tongue with is own it took every thing he had to stifle the moans. Hey, when did I become the uke?
Kai slid over to Ryuk. "Pretty hot eh?" He nudged the younger male's side, wiggling his eyebrows.
Ryuk grumbled something and turned away. Shiwi is my man though...
Link was completely melted into a puddle of goo, he gave up the tongue battle long ago, and was finding he was content to let Shigen do whatever he wanted to him. He wrapped his arms around Shigen's neck and pressed himself against him without much thought.
Their minute was up a while ago, but neither of them seemed to care.
CRASH!
"Sexy... you just bit my tongue..."
"I'm sorry! The thunder scared me!"
"You two are done now?" Kai was cuddled up under Ryuk's blanket, Ryuk was dozing off, his eyes were closing slowly, the thunder couldn't have woken him up at this point.
"Yes we're done, you were suppose to say when the minute was up Kaiten." Link stood and brushed himself off, moving to the opposite side of the tent, far away from Shigen.
"Hey, I was enjoying your uke moment." Kai picked up a near by pillow and hit Ryuk over the head with it.
"What the fuck was that for?" Ryuk yanked the pillow out of Kai's hand and hit him back.
Kai held his arms up in an attempt to protect himself. "Link's turn is next, you have to be awake!"
Link looked up. "Hey, I think the rain stopped."
"It doesn't matter, everyone has to have a chance to pick truth or dare!" Kai positioned himself in front of the tent's only escape root and glared at all of them, daring them to try and leave.
Link sighed. "Ryuk, truth or dare."
Ryuk groaned and smothered himself with the pillow. "Dare, there's no way in hell I'm telling you anything embarrassing."
Link already had a dare prepared. I thought Kai would make me do this, so we might as well not waste it.
"I want you to get naked and run once across the camp ground."
Kai started laughing so hard he fell over. "That sounds like a dare I would give!"
"I am not going to run around this place naked! Are you fucking crazy?"
"Hey, I didn't want to kiss Shigen, but I had to didn't I?" Link pounced on Ryuk and started pulling his clothes off, it didn't take long for Shigen to join.
"Well you enjoyed your dare!" Ryuk held onto his pants for dear life, his pride was on the line here.
Link looked at Shigen and shrugged.
"That's because I'm such a damn good kisser that he had no choice to enjoy it... But you know how it is don't you love...?" Shigen sent Ryuk one of those dazzling smiles and Ryuk's strength faltered.
The pants were gone.
The three of them worked together to push Ryuk out of the tent, once he was out, they all got out to watch the show.
Ryuk's face was so red, Link almost pitied him, the poor guy was trying to cover himself and cursing enough to make a sailor blush. "Okay Ryuk, once around the campground, try not to get arrested."
"Come on you guys, I'm cold!" Ryuk looked like he was about to cry.
"Just think of it this way love... once you're done you can get back at someone else..." Shigen leaned down to give his boyfriend a little kiss on the nose and then waved him off.
With one last curse, Ryuk turned around and booked it across the open field, almost tripping over some poor camper's tent wire a few times, and trying not to fall in burnt out fires.
But luckily for poor Ryuk, everyone was still in their tents, hiding from the dampness of the rain. Well... Except for one guy who peeked his head out of his tent at the wrong time and was faced with Ryuk's ass. He laughed and then went back into his tent.
"Hey dudes, there's some skinny guy running around naked outside!"
His friends all laughed and poked their heads out to catch a glimpse. They all started cat calling and cheering as Ryuk turned around and ran back to the others.
"Shake it baby! Shake it!"
"Shut the fuck up you creeps!"
Ryuk's pride was gone.
When he finally made it back to the guys, Ryuk was ready to cry. "Okay Shigen, I hope you're ready for payback."
Shigen covered the younger man with a blanked and hugged him. "I look forward to it..."
Once the were all situated back inside, Ryuk turned on his boyfriend. "Okay love, truth or dare?"
Shigen decided to be the smart one. "I'll pick truth... there's nothing about me that I'm ashamed about..."
Too bad he didn't bother looking into the future...
"Oh really, then why don't you tell everyone the pet name I gave you."
Damn...
That made Kai's ears perk up. "Emo has a pet name?" He scooted over to Shigen and pet his head. "Come emo~ Tell us about this name!"
"It's... ah..." He whispered something that not even Link and Kai's ears could pick up.
Kai leaned in closer. "What was that emo?"
"It's... Shi... wi..."
Link couldn't decide what was funnier, the name, or the fact that Shigen was blushing with embarrassment.
"Shiwi! So you're a fruit? Wait! Not like that! I meant the other fruit... The one you eat! That didn't sound right either..."
Link spared the shadow. "You mean a Kiwi?"
"Yeah! That's the thing!" He hugged Shigen. "Shiwi~ Shiwi~ Yummy as a Kiwi~"
"I knew you would make fun of it..." Shigen smirked. "But alas... the time for tormenting Shiwi is over.. and now its time for Kai to suffer.."
Kai, who was still humming his new song, shrugged. "Give it your best. Oh and I choose dare, you ain't getting no secrets from me."
"Just what I was hopping for... I dare you to call up Ganondorf on your cell and confess your undying love to him..."
Kai's happy expression disappeared. "Damn it! Hit a guy where it hurts!" He reached for his bag and pulled out his phone. "I'll put it on speaker...."
Link opened a bag of chips and began munching on them. "This'll be good." He passed the bag to Shigen and Ryuk.
Kai dialed the number.
"Hello?"
"Hey master, it's Kai."
"Oh... And why are you calling me my pet?"
"I... Have something to tell you.." Kai stopped to glare at Link who was trying not to laugh.
"Yes?"
"The truth is... I think I love you. Wait, I know I love you! I know I'm with Link, but I always find myself thinking of you."
"So you've finally seen the light Kaiten?"
"Yes. I love you, and I want to be with you... Or getting in your pants would be fine too..." Kai pulled away from the phone and made gaging motions.
"Well I think there's only enough room for me in my pants, but if you want sex, that's a different story."
Everyone was trying so hard not to laugh.
"Yeah, that sounds fucking awesome, literally. I have to go, my stupid boyfriend is back."
"See you later pet."
"Bai master~"
As soon as he phone hung up, everyone laughed.
"That had to be the stupidest thing I've ever done!" Kai managed to say between gasps. "But, what will I do when we get back and he comes looking for me?"
Shigen wiped the tears out of his eyes. "Just tell him you were drunk or something."
After they were done killing themselves, Link stood up. "I'm hungry, I'm going out to light the fire so we can have marshmallows and hot dogs." He opened the tent door and stepped out.
"I'm coming!" Kai was up next following the hero outside.
Shigen zipped the door shut after he left, then crawled under the blankets with Ryuk. "I'm staying here until they get the fire lit."
Ryuk didn't waste any time snuggling up to the emo. "Did I tell you I love you yet today?"
"Nope... say it..."
Ryuk wiggled up and kissed Shigen lovingly on the lips. "I love you... Hm... More than all the stars in the sky."
"And I love you more than all the stars in the galaxy."
Ryuk raised an eyebrow. "Did I just get owned?"
"Damn crooked."
Link poked at the newly made fire with a stick.
It hissed angrily at him and popped loudly, scaring the shit out of Kai who was siting on the other side of it.
"Holy dancing monkey balls!"
"Kai, the fire is not going to eat you..."
"I know that stupid, I just don't like fire, it burns you know."
"Really? I thought it made anything it touched into water."
Kai picked up a nearby rock and threw it in Link's direction. "Sarcasm is Shiwi's thing."
Link poked the fire again. "He can share... Come on, let's go get the chairs and the food."
On their way back with all the goods, they hit the tent to get Shigen and Ryuk's attention. "Come on you two, food time."
There were several shuffling sounds, followed by a curse (Ryuk) and the two tumbled out of the tent looking slightly flustered.
"Oooo~ What were you two doing?" Kai said, smiling slyly at them.
Shigen didn't miss a beat. "Each other..."
"Oh gods! Dirty boys!" Kai cackled and booked it over to the fire, the others were soon following.
Hot dogs were the first on the list since it was lunch time, the clouds had cleared and it had gone back to being a beautiful camping day.
Link had to stick Kai's hot dog on the stick because Kai couldn't stop laughing. Link wanted to know, but then again, he didn't.
"Is it just me, or is my wiener becoming erect?"
Nope, he really didn't want to know. "Kai, get your mind out of the gutter."
"Look at it though! It's totally happy!"
"It's because of the stick, it's bent like that on purpose, and I think it's done..." Link pulled his off his stick and nibbled on it.
"Done like a virgin, fucked for the very first time~!"
Ryuk choked on his hot dog.
Shigen patted him on the back. "Sorry... I should have warned you about that one..."
"You think?"
"I think we should go for a walk." Link said, stuffing the rest of his hot dog in his mouth.
Shigen muttered something under his breath. "Where would we take a walk to sexy...?"
"Well on the map it shows a path that leads to a waterfall. And it's not too long, so you city folk wont have to worry about your pampered feet getting blisters."
Shigen coughed lightly to cover up a laugh. "We're not the ones that live in a mansion..."
"The only reason I bought that mansion was so that I could live with Kai, but be as far away from him as possible, but as you can see that plan didn't work out too well."
He looked at Kai who was currently poking the fire with a stick, Kai looked over at him and winked. "You love me hero~"
"Damn crooked."
"Am I the only one who hasn't said my catch phrase today?" The shadow glared at all of them.
Ryuk didn't want to be the only one left out. "Um, damn crooked?"
"I hate you all."
Shigen cut him off before he went crazy and attacked everyone. "Calm down shadow... me and Ryuk are going to go change out of our pajamas so we can go to this water fall... You two should do the same..." He stood up and pulled Ryuk away, who was still in the process of eating and trying not to choke once again.
"Alright Kai." Link said while getting to his feet. "Let's go change out of our fuzzy pajamas and go for a walk!"
"Kai pouted and let out a sad sigh. "Not so damn crooked..."
"Link, you are way to damn boring! You're going to make us walk all the way down this path just to see a bunch of rocks pissing out water?"
Link smacked Kai on the back of the head lightly. "Idiot, the rocks don't 'piss out' water, there's a river attached you know."
Kai shrugged and went back to licking his ice cream.
Link had provided everyone with the snack to keep them all from whining to much during the walk. It was a smart move, everyone liked ice cream.
Ryuk glared at the evil ice cream. "I have sensitive teeth, it hurts to bite it."
Kai shook his head sadly. "You don't have to put it in your mouth, you can just lick it."
All of them fell silent as they thought about that sentence.
Kai face-palmed. "Oh dear goddesses."
Shigen smirked. "That's what she said..."
Link and Ryuk were the only ones not amused, of course, they weren't perverts like the other two...
Kai inhaled the last of his ice cream and jogged ahead of the group. "Hey! I can hear the pissing rocks!"
He ran ahead a little further and stopped. "Hey! I can see the pissing rocks now! Come on Shigen! You can do it~ Just a little further!"
Shigen mumbled out something that sounded like 'shut the hell up' before running full speed towards Kai who screamed like a girl and started running for his life.
Ryuk walked faster until he was walking beside Link. "I like you."
Link looked at him with wide eyes.
"No! Not like that!" He waved his hands frantically in front of him. "I mean, I like you because you're slightly normal..."
Link laughed and captured Ryuk in a friendly hug, ruffling his hair like he was a kid. "And I like you because you're so cute!"
It didn't take long for the swearing to start.
Kai ran up to them and stopped a few feet away, he was doubled over panting. "Hey Link! Stop raping the kid and come see the pissing rocks! I dared emo to jump in!" He latched onto a confused Link and Ryuk and dragged them the rest of the way.
When they got there, Link looked up at the waterfall. I think I just cracked my neck...
The waterfall was huge to say the least, the whole area was almost like a hidden beach in the middle of the forest. The water was falling into a deep circular, crystal clear pool that was filled with icy looking water. The beach around the pool was covered with smooth rocks and white sand.
Ryuk was obviously impressed, his mouth was hanging open. "It's... huge..."
Kai really couldn't resist. "That what she said!" He ignored the scary glare and pointed to the cliff that was beside the pool. "Look at the idiot."
Shigen was standing in his boxers on a rock that wasn't to high above the water. He seemed cold because he was hugging himself.
Kai skipped over to the water's edge. "Okay emo! You can jump now!"
Shigen gave him the a thumbs up before launching himself off the rock and into the freezing water.
"Fuck it's cold!"
Yes, Shigen was yelling... and cursing...
"Fuck!"
Kai was on his knees laughing so hard he was crying. "That crazy bastard didn't believe me when I told him the water was cold!"
Link and Ryuk weren't amused.
Link was already pulling his clothes off, ready to jump in the water and save their comrade. He knew what river water did, it suffocated and squeezed the air out of you.
Ryuk was just watching the scene with a deadpan face. Hanging around with these people is exhausting.
There was another splash as Link dove into the water determined to save the now drowning Shigen.
"Come on baby! Flex those muscles!" Kai didn't seem to notice Shigen's problem, he was only focused on the half naked Link.
The hero was a good swimmer, so he was able to get Shigen and swim back to the shore in record time.
Shigen was shaking violently. "Ne-e-e-e-ev-e-er-er-er.... a-a-a-a-ga-ga-ga-in...."
Kai felt bad for the whole incident, so he pounced on Shigen and hugged him. "Come on everyone! Group hug! Shiwi's balls are frozen!"
Link was shaking too, but not as badly as Shigen, but he was still more than happy to comply to Kai's suggestion, Ryuk followed after him. They all stood there shivering.
There was a laugh before Kai asked. "Would it be awkward if I told you guys my nipples are hard?"
After the not so fun waterfall incident, the guys had dragged the still freezing Ryuk back to camp and changed him into warm clothes then threw him next to the fire to defrost him, which seemed to help after a while because he was currently telling them all a spooky story while he ate marshmallows.
The story it's self was not particularly scary, but when you brought in the now complete darkness of night, a full moon, and a few rustling brushes every once and a while, it made it a bit scarier.
Okay... Scary enough to scare Kai, who was currently trying not to cry while hiding under a blanket and snuggling into Link.
"And then... He opened the door and..." Shigen paused to make it more dramatic. "BANG!"
Kai screamed.
"The zombie jumped out of nowhere... and ate him..."
"Fuck you emo! That was scary as hell!" Kai popped his head out from under the blanket and looked at Link who was trying not to fall asleep. "Hero! Wake the hell up!"
Link jumped. "Jeez! I'm up, I'm up..."
"It seems I've killed two people with boredom..." Shigen poked the sleeping Ryuk beside him who let out a rather terrifying snore before snuggling closer to Shigen's warmth.
Link got to his feet and bent down to pick Kai up. "I'm with Ryuk, I'm tired... See you tomorrow Shigen."
Shigen nodded and waved goodbye. "Night sexy..."
Yawning, Kai mumbled out. "Use protection."
"I could say the same to you..."
Link awkwardly unzipped the tent and crawled in. He placed Kai on their double sleeping bag and went back to the opening, he watched as Shigen picked up his sleepy Ryuk and carried him off to their tent.
"Well, Shigen's gone to bed." He closed the zipper and crawled over next to Kai.
Kai pulled the hero on top of him. "Now things can get interesting." He planted a sweet kiss on Link's lips and smiled.
It didn't take ling for Link to devour the shadow's mouth. Ha! I'm a good kisser too! His thoughts were proven true as Kai let out a small moan. That's right! I'm a damn good kisser!
That thought was followed by a rather scary loud moan.
Both men stopped their tongue spelunking.
"Link? Was that you?"
"Nope, I'm pretty sure that was you..."
"Hey, I don't sound like that!"
Mooooann~
Kai buried his face into Link's chest. "Holy fuck!"
"Shigen! Go to bed!" Link growled out into the dark.
There was no answer, just the sound of rustling bushes.
With a grumble, Link got up and unzipped the tent. "I'll go beat the shit out of him." He couldn't see Kai's expression in the dark, but he knew the shadow was terrified. He exited the tent and zipped it up behind him.
Kai listened to the sound of Link's foot falls on the outside of the tent. His heart was racing so fast he was concerned that it might jump out of his chest at any moment.
There was a crashing sound outside followed by a yelp.
Kai sat there frozen. I'm a fucking demon! Why am I too afraid to move?!
Another loud moan reminded him exactly why he was too scared to move.
Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit!
He crab crawled backwards until his back hit the side of the tent, scaring the shit out of him. He managed to cover his mouth before he screamed though. Stupid wall! I almost pissed myself!
Unfortunately for Kai, backing up against the tent was exactly what his attacker wanted him to do.
Two hands from the outside of the tent grabbed his sides, prompting a rather loud and girlish scream from the shadow, who then proceeded to flail for his life, trying everything in his power to run away from his attacker.
"Brains.... Brains... I want your brains!!!!"
"You're attacking the wrong person bud! I don't have brains! Link tells me that every day!"
"I do not!"
Apparently the zombie wasn't interested in brains anymore.
The attacking arms stopped and pulled away.
"Kai, I don't say that to you!" There was a pause. "Wait.... Do I?"
Kai dissolved into a shadow and appeared next to Link outside the tent. "It was you!"
He tackled the hero to the ground. "You bastard! I hate you right now! I was almost ready to cry in there!"
The sound of laughter made him direct his attention to the two humans nearby.
"You idiots think this is funny eh? Well let's see how funny it is when I send your tent to the shadow world!"
Kai disappeared again.
Link quickly sat up. "He'll do it you know..."
Shigen looked at Ryuk who was still laughing his ass off. "Looks like we'll be sleeping in the car tonight..."
Kai unzipped the tent, got out and stretched.
It was a beautiful Sunday morning, there was nothing better than waking up to a bright and sunny day.
Even though the thought of school ruined it...
He turned his head as the sound of the car door opening caught his attention. He cheerfully skipped over and smiled at Link who had just tumbled out of the driver's door. Ryuk and Shigen were next out of the back seat.
Shigen just sat on the grass, while Ryuk hung his head off the seat looking half dead.
Shigen sat there rubbing a kink out of his neck. I can't believe he actually sent our tent to the shadow world... He waved at the way too happy Kai, there was no point in talking to him when he was in a bad mood.
Kai waved back then looked at Link.
"Have a good sleep there hero?"
Link rubbed his eyes. "Yeah, it was good I guess."
Kai smiled and bent down to kiss the hero on the cheek. "Good, because it's where you'll be sleeping for the rest of the week~"
Man... it took me weeks to finish this...
Hope you all enjoyed it~
And found it... heh...