Author's Note: It's been awhile since I've written anything over pg-13. I was working on something else smutty for BTR when I got this little idea in my head and it wouldn't leave me alone. It's set in the future even though there's no mention of BTR. It's all James/Logan. So, I hope you enjoy even though it terrified me to write this haha. REVIEW! They make my day! :)
Beta'ed by: Shisou_Eimin, squoctobird, and Morior Invictus. Thanks bb's! :) 3
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Zip, zilch, nada, nothing. Unfortunately.
"Don't leave me."
A simple plea. How could he ignore that?
"You know I never meant to hurt you."
A lie. A bullshit excuse so he won't be angry, so he won't leave.
"Logan, please."
Logan tenses and stops shoving clothes into his duffel bag. What is he supposed to do? He can't stand here and listen to James' excuses over and over. But he can't stay here, either. Before he can stop himself he's whirling around and shoving his finger into James' chest.
"Don't tell me to stay, don't tell me that, James!" Every word has James backing up until he's pressed against the bedroom door. "You cheated, and you want me to stay? That's bullshit and you know it." Logan gives one more hard jab with his finger then stalks back to the bed. He can feel the anger boiling underneath the surface; his face is already burning with it.
James doesn't say another word, instead lets out a long breath. When Logan glances over his shoulder James is still leaning against the door. He looks-defeated and angry and sad all at once. It almost breaks Logan's heart to see it. But no. James brought this upon himself. He is the one that broke all the rules.
It's all his fault.
"Logan-"
"I said don't," Logan mutters. He shoves one last shirt into the bag, hoists the duffel over his shoulders, then spins around, intent on leaving. But one look at James standing there, arms wrapped around himself, eyes downcast, and he's dropping the bag to the floor. "Look, I'm just—I need a night or two to think."
"Logan, you don't have to leave! I'll—I'll sleep on the couch or something. Just," he sighs heavily, taking a step towards Logan, "don't leave. Please." When he reaches out to touch, Logan flinches and moves back. "Let me at least explain?"
That gets Logan riled up again. Explain? There's no explanation to it. "What the fuck, James? Explain? Explain!" His hands ball into fists at his sides, his temperature boiling now. For a moment all he wants to do is grab his bag and just leave, get out; then his thoughts take a turn for the darker side of things. If James can cheat and lie, Logan can make him see what he will be missing out on.
That in mind, Logan balls the front of James' shirt in his hand and yanks him into a forceful kiss. It's bruising and hot and painful; he wants James to feel it. He backs James into the wall, stands on his tippy toes so he can reach better.
James' fingers dig into his sides through his leather jacket so hard that Logan is sure there will be bruises come morning. But he doesn't care. This is about making James regret every bad decision he made over the past few days. He pushes a couple of fingers between the top two buttons on James' shirt and tugs hard enough to pop the buttons off.
James pulls away, ready to protest the ruining of his favorite shirt, but Logan continues popping the buttons until the shirt is hanging open, tanned skin exposed and inviting. Licking his lips, Logan leans forward and latches onto James' skin, right above the collarbone. He sucks hard enough to bruise; catches the spot between his teeth just enough to hurt.
Logan soothes the sting with his tongue. No. He's supposed to be mad at James, not soothing away any pain. James caused all the pain and now he gets to experience it. Logan yanks the shirt off one arm at a time then tosses the piece of clothing to the side.
"You're gonna feel it, James. You're going to regret doing this," Logan whisper harshly.
"I already do," James responds, moaning low in his throat when Logan scratches his nails over James' nipples. He dips his head down, lips replacing his fingers on the right nipple. He sucks on it, tugs it between his teeth, 'til he causes James to moan like that again.
"Such a nice body. It's a shame you had to go and share it," Logan says before leaving a trail of hot kisses to James' Adam's apple. It bobs fast under his lips when James swallows hard. He pulls away to look up at James. "I hope he enjoyed it." James' eye slip closed. Logan hopes it's because he's too guilty to look at him.
"I'm sorry, Logan."
Logan ignores the apology. That's the millionth time he's heard it since he found out hours before. Instead of responding, he latches back on to James' throat. James' pulse flutters sporadically when he passes over that spot. He wonders if he made James feel like this.
Another moan spills from James' mouth and Logan silently revels in it. He takes his hands and, gripping James' ass tight, pulls their hips flush together. James is already half-hard. Logan lets out a moan of his own at the feeling. He runs his hands up James' naked back and threads his fingers through James' hair, tugging him down into a rough kiss. Their teeth click together almost painfully but he ignores it.
"Logan, fuck," James breaks away gasping.
"Did you say that when he kissed you?" Logan doesn't give James time to answer before he's pressing their lips together briefly. "Tell me, James, how many drinks did you have? How many does it take for the amazing James Diamond to get drunk and cheat on his boyfriend for a bit of fun? Huh?"
When James doesn't answer, instead choosing to look away guiltily, Logan growls and steps back. He takes in the sight of James standing there against the wall, half-naked, hard, and sweaty. Smirking, he reaches out towards James' jeans.
Logan slips his fingers into the belt loops of James' jeans and yanks James forward. He keeps tugging while walking backwards until they're at the bed, James stumbling on his feet. Normally Logan would find that kind of adorable but tonight he doesn't care.
Logan deftly undoes the button then slides the zipper down slow, knuckles brushing over the bulge in James' pants. James bucks his hips, breathing becoming shallow. When Logan glances up he sees that James has his eyes closed tightly.
"Open your eyes," Logan snaps. James does as he's told. Logan tries to ignore the fire in those beautiful eyes. It will only make him feel worse.
He makes quick work of the rest of James' clothing before getting rid of his own. Finally, finally, James is naked before him, skin already slick with a sheen of sweat, breathing harsh. Logan orders James to get on the bed and if his voice is shaking slightly he'll be damned if he lets it show. This isn't about him, not quite.
Logan watches as James props himself up on his elbows, waiting. He swallows thickly before crawling on the bed, leaving a path of hot, open-mouthed kisses along the expanse before him. James arches into his touch, begins to beg for Logan to touch him where he wants it most.
When Logan reaches James' neck, he nips a path to his ear, whispers, "I'm going to fuck you," then presses a kiss there. "I'm going to fuck you so hard that you'll be able to feel me for days." I want you to remember what you've ruined. But he doesn't say it; that seems almost too harsh and he doesn't want to be the one with regrets in the morning.
Logan wastes no time in wrapping his hand around James' cock. James tries to move, tries to rock up into Logan's hand but Logan holds James down with his free hand. "Logan-" James trails off into a moan as Logan gives a particularly sharp tug.
"Shut up."
Logan smirks at the immediate response he gets. James clamps his mouth shut even though he wants to say something so badly, Logan can tell. He twists his hand on the upstroke, causing James to shudder almost violently.
He slides his other hand down James' chest, feeling the muscles contract under his fingertips just because he's touching. He scoots backward enough that he can bend down and, with one glance up at James, wrap his lips around the head of his cock. James nearly skyrockets off the bed and Logan has to hold the other boy's hips down with his arm.
Logan knows James can't be quiet for long. He's never been the quiet one in bed no matter how many times Logan warned him he was going to wake the neighbor's. Knowing this, Logan takes more in, keeps going until his nose is pressed against James' belly. He keeps his arm over James' hips tight enough to keep James from bucking up and gagging him.
"Logan, fuck," James whispers. The sound of it shakes Logan's resolve. He won't give in. He won't let James win him over with whispered words and dumb excuses.
Logan stops what he's doing and pulls off, which causes James to groan in protest. He sits back and studies James for a moment. Sees the way his eyes are shut tight, the way his chest is heaving, sees the way he's shaking. James opens his eyes then. There's regret and hurt and lust clear as day. Logan hates how much they pull him in even when he's angry.
That in mind, Logan growls and surges forward, their lips and teeth connecting painfully. James leans up into the kiss, pushing for more. But Logan tears himself away and holds two fingers up to James' mouth. James wraps his lips around the digits and sucks on them, thoroughly coating them in saliva. Watching him gets Logan hot all over and he's already painfully hard, has been since he started this.
"Enough," he says sharply. James falls back onto the bed, Logan going with him to kiss him again. James raises a leg up, bent at the knee, angling his hips just so allowing Logan easy access. Logan circles both fingers around James' entrance before sliding them both in and making James moan loudly.
Logan waits until James relaxes. When he finally does Logan scissors his fingers, opening James up good and quick. He doesn't waste his time in doing so and it isn't long before he's pulling them out and pushing James' leg back farther then he's there, lined up and shoving his cock in rough and fast.
They both moan simultaneously. James wraps his legs around Logan's waist, heels digging into Logan's lower back hard enough to hurt. The anger is still there, still boiling under the surface, fueling him on as he pulls out part of the way then snaps his hips forward. James cries out and clutches at the bed sheets in a white-knuckled grasp.
Logan does it again and again, his pace increasing. He leans down, lips finding skin, teeth finding purchase on a spot below James' pulse point. He sinks his teeth into the soft spot, hard enough to bruise but not enough to break the skin. James is clutching at him desperately as he continues to drive forward like it's the last time they'll ever do this.
It is the last time, Logan.
Logan chokes on a gasp or maybe a sob, he isn't sure, and grabs onto James' hips with both hands. The new angle causes him to hit James' prostate dead on; James' back arching high off the bed at the sensation. Logan nearly loses it right then but he holds on. This is about James.
"Logan, fuck, fuck, I'm sorry, sorry, fuck," James rambles out. Logan releases his hold on James' hips. James grips Logan's waist tighter, heels digging in harder; Logan winces but doesn't tell him to let go. He slides his hands up James' chest, hips stilling for a moment so he can push his fingers in sweaty hair and hold on tight. "Shit, Logan," James moans.
Logan silences him with a kiss. He runs his tongue along James' bottom lip until James opens up, allowing him to sweep his tongue inside. It's hot and sogoodsofuckinggood and it nearly breaks his heart when he remembers that James did this with someone else. James moans—louder this time—and Logan thrusts forward hard, hard enough to slide James up the bed a bit.
Groaning, James brings his hands up to Logan's cheeks, holding him there, and for a moment Logan doesn't mind. This may be about James and rough fucking but he doesn't ever want the kiss to end. Hands card through his hair and—no, he can't let this turn sweet and forgiving.
That in mind, Logan pulls away fast, James' hands falling back to the sheets. Logan braces himself on James' sweat-slick chest, looks James right in the eye, and thrusts deep. James clenches around him, head thrown back, but gaze still locked with Logan's. He does it again and James keeps on squeezing tight and hot around him, driving him crazy.
His thrusts lose their rhythm, becoming choppy and erratic. James is writhing beneath him like it's the best he's ever had. Logan is hit with the image of James kissing someone else, touching someone else. It brings the anger back full force and he's fucking James until he's right there, so close he can almost feel it. Then James mutters something that nearly breaks his heart all over again.
"Don't leave me, don't leave me, fuck, Logan." Logan is sure James doesn't realize what he's saying but it still makes Logan want to cry nonetheless. "Don'tleavemeplease."
And Logan's resolve breaks. With one last rough shove he's coming hard, hips stuttering and a moan spilling from his lips. He doesn't stop, though. He keeps going until James goes over the edge, too, a rough fuck slipping out.
He pulls out of James' body gently. All his anger has left him. He feels drained and sad and heartbroken. James tries to wrap his arms around Logan but Logan jerks away and sits on the edge of the bed. The mattress shifts then James is there, sitting with him, a hand hovering in the air like he doesn't know if he can touch Logan or not.
There's nothing Logan can say; not right now. He thought he wanted to make James see how angry he was, wanted to make James regret everything he did. Now Logan feels kind of empty and at a loss for what to do. So he settles with standing and putting his clothes back on before grabbing his bag.
"Logan, don't leave," James says softly. Arms suddenly wrap around Logan's waist and he's being pulled back onto the bed. James kisses his cheek, his ear, his neck; whispers words of apology. Logan can't do this, not now, but he allows it for the moment.
"James-"
James rolls him onto his back then kisses him. Logan just lies there and lets him because he can't do this. He can't allow James to kiss him like there's nothing wrong, like this is something that can be fixed by morning.
But for now he'll just lie here with James. He'll listen to James mumble through his apologies and he'll try not to cry. In the morning, or maybe when James finally falls asleep, he'll get up and he'll grab his bag and he'll walk out that door without looking back.
Until then he'll just lie here.