Fifteen year old wizards really do not belong in muggle clubs intended for only those over twenty one, Remus decided fervently as he was propositioned by a woman with hardly more than scraps of a shirt over her bulbous chest. For one, he had no ridiculously large box of condoms with him, and he wasn't about to ask Sirius for any, for two, he didn't feel like getting his back all cramped up against a bathroom stall thrusting into a stranger, and for three, he didn't fancy women in the least and as hard as he tried, she didn't seem to be becoming any more manly.

He was supporting a thoroughly drunk Sirius Black, who had been flirting incessantly with him the entire night, drunk and quite possibly high from taking joints from people who found him attractive (of which there were many, to be sure). Remus was enjoying the flirting and Sirius' warm breath on his shoulder, but all this attention had only helped him achieve an impressive erection straining against his tight jeans, which was not about to be satisfied by Sirius, who Remus doubted would ever be attracted to him. His lust would just go unrequited.

There were a multitude of couples dry humping everywhere, including James and the same woman who tried to get with Remus earlier. Every ethnicity, size, and gender were mixed together, and nothing whatsoever was taboo in these places, except not sharing your goods with someone else, and Remus and Sirius were both breaking this large rule at the moment.

And now only Remus was, left all alone when Sirius went off with an older man who seemed about twenty five, but it wasn't as if Sirius had anything to lose, such as his virginity. To be honest, neither did Remus, but nobody knew except James.

Remus looked depressed, leaning against the bar as he sat heavily on a stool and asked the bartender for the strongest thing they had, trying to block himself out completely as he lit up a cigarette. The drink burned his throat, and he thought maybe it was for the better, make it numb so if he had the urge to let someone fuck his face, it wouldn't make much difference. James came over after a bit and tore him away from the bar to slip an arm around his shoulders and force him to get some fresh air.

"Are you all right, Moony? I swear you'll pass out and just get yourself molested by everyone – they want to anyway. You just looked kind of pale in there."

"It's the ruddy bastard, James," Remus burst out, feeling detached and vulnerable.

"Who? What? I'll take care of it, Rem." Ever since Remus had come to him for comfort late third year after a particularly bad full moon, he had done his best to protect the frail seeming boy, even though he would think that Sirius would be more likely to fill that role.

"It's Sirius, fucking Sirius." A head was buried in James' shoulder and he could almost swear Remus was crying, except for the lack of a wet spot on his dark t-shirt.

"W-what did he do to you, Moony?"

"He's just bloody perfect, that's what," he choked out. "He won't leave me alone and I've got the most painful hard on ever." Remus was secretly thankful that although James must have felt it against his thigh, as Remus was a few inches shorter, he hadn't commented. "He insisted on the leather and the tightest t-shirt he could wear without crossing his disturbing enough boundaries. Sirius just goes that extra mile as if he knows that I fancy him" – James let out a sort of gasp of realization – "and it turns me on to no end. All I have to look forward to is a fucking crackhead whore at school, my hand, or my mouth if I can be bothered to attempt to be flexible."

James didn't respond at first, just wrapped his arms around Remus as a posh looking couple in their forties walked by and gave him a look like Keep that rubbish inside, you queer slut. And he just held his friend there in the most comforting way that he knew how, and somehow it didn't seem gay at all the way he did it, just nice. "I'm sorry, Remus. I really should have noticed. Don't worry about it, he's just being a whorebag while he can enjoy himself as a teenage before he has to wear a suit and tie to work." That at least brought a small chuckle out of Remus as they let go of each other. "He'll come round eventually and you two will fall in love and shag every night on one of your beds illegally. How long… have you known?"

"One year anniversary today," he said bitterly. "You remember his last birthday, August twenty first, we got really fucking drunk and I realized how head over heels I was for him, at fucking fourteen, even before you guys knew how to transform." They had only perfected it a week or two ago.

"That long? Well, let's go back in and I'll buy you a beer and have this." He fished a few joints from his pocket and handed them to Remus. "They're strong… they'll make you feel better." Remus looked at him uncertainly. "I promise."

-

Remus didn't have another breakdown after that and life went on as usual. They went shopping with James' parents (who doted on Sirius, Remus, and Peter as if three more sons) for school supplies, slept over at Remus' house the weekend before September first and got completely high on pot, and lived their lives to the fullest.

And his thin wall of resolve cracked sometime in early September, before he'd been expecting it. It was the tenth and he had just smoked a pack of cigarettes and was raiding Sirius' bedside table for some more, but only found two joints and his ashtray. While he was doing this, James came into the dormitory and quickly wrinkled his nose at the distinctive odor of too many smokes, despite the open window and shoddy air freshening spell.

"You're completely high," James said flatly, pulling Remus away from the drawer and shutting it with a loud crashing noise.

"And you're completely hot," Remus responded, his inhibitions lowered. He grabbed James by his school tie and forced their lips together, although James hardly resisted.

"I'm not Sirius," he protested half-heartedly as fumbling fingers unbuttoned his shirt, but the shorter boy didn't stop, but perhaps proceeded more quickly as he pulled the shirt away and mashed their lips together a second time. Remus tasted like cigarettes and faintly like the shot of scotch he'd had about two hours ago in the Common Room, which Peter had brought him from the Kitchens, but James didn't mind, because it was warm and nice and they both needed each other, both tired of their pent up lust directed at people uninterested in them.

"Of course you're not. He's much prettier." And Remus pushed his friend down on the taller boy's bed and kissed him like he was the only other person in the world – and right then, they were alone and together and releasing their frustration.

Then again, if they had remembered that Peter and Sirius were only at their first detentions of the year and would be back eventually, they may have bothered to clean themselves up afterwards and Remus may have gotten into his own bed before drifting off to sleep.

The door banging open startled the two boys and once they saw the other half of their group, they scrambled to cover themselves.

"What's this?" Peter said with an eyebrow raised.

"It's nothing, nothing," said Remus hastily. "One night stand, I was high and he probably was too."

"You know what, Remus? I get fucking tired of this one night stand business. How many boys have you shagged in the last year, and how many were crack heads? You treat yourself like a slut and you try to get your rocks off anywhere possible."

"It's none of your business," Remus growled, getting up elegantly and dressing in a pair of pajamas.

"It fucking is. You're my friend. You let these boys abuse you – I see the marks on you sometimes. You're better then that, fucking better."

At that, Remus simply stood up, strode over to the door and punched Sirius in the face and the taller boy fell back.

"It's none of your business," he repeated, and turned out the lights.

-

AN: So I'm trying my hand at a chapter fic. What do you think so far?