Hey, dragonchikfan here. This fic is cowrote (cowritten?) with the astounding and amazing (her words, not mine) WatchOutForWendigos. Make sure you check out her new fic if you like this one. Enjoy:)
Disclaimer: We do not own Young Justice or any part of the DC universe. If we did, Wally would eat more muffins. Lots and lots of muffins.
Robin grinned at his pupil. "Superboy, in today's lesson you will learn one of the most important things a man should know."
Superboy glanced around the training center. "Where's Black Canary?"
Kid Flash wagged his finger at the hero. "Nah ah, today Robin and I are your teachers. So, you ready to begin?"
Superboy sighed, crossing his arms. "I guess."
"Awesome. Now, this class is called Bros 101. We," Kid Flash said, motioning towards himself and Robin, "are going to teach you," at this he pointed towards Superboy, "how to initiate and perform a 'man hug'. It's important you realize guys don't hug other guys, at least not how you and Megan do."
Superboy blushed at that statement. "I-" he started to protest, but Robin cut him off.
"Yeah, yeah, we've heard it all before. The first step in a man hug is to grasp your bro's hand like you are going to shake hands."
"Bro?"
"You know, your buddy? The guy you are about to celebrate with," Kid Flash said with a slightly exasperated expression. "We have a lot of work to do," he whispered to Rob.
Superboy was still slightly confused, but he nodded. Robin ignored Kid, continuing on with the lesson. "Next, change your grip so that your fingers are wrapped around your bro's thumb, like so." At that, Robin and Kid Flash demonstrated, their thumbs linking together as their fingers wrapped around the side of the other's hand.
Superboy grabbed Kid Flash's hand while Robin assessed his grip. "No, a little bit lower down the hand. Your thumbs need to be bent around each other. There, you got it."
The angst ridden teenager smiled hesitantly as Robin and Kid Flash gave him encouraging looks. "Now what?"
Kid Flash jumped in. "Okay, next you pull your bro in for a shoulder bump." He and Robin displayed the next step, keeping their linked hands at about chest level and only their upper torsos coming together.
"Now remember, no superstrength. You want to pull in your bro, not throw him over your shoulder and across the room," Robin reminded.
Once again, Superboy attempted the steps so far on Kid Flash, only throwing him into a wall twice before he got the hang of it. Kid Flash moaned. "Why do I have to be Supey's partner?" he complained.
Rob rolled his eyes. "Remember, we drew straws, and you lost. Besides, I'm the one explaining everything, and you have accelerated healing."
The speedster mumbled unpleasant things under his breath, but he took his position in front of the teenage Kryptonian as Robin continued with his lecture. "The last and final step is slapping your bro on the back once while continuing to grasp his hand. This slap isn't too light, but no harder than how you would smack someone on the back if they were choking, or if you were giving someone a high five. After the slap, step back from your bro to an appropriate distance, releasing his hand in the process. Ready to try it?"
"I think so."
"Good. Kid Flash, if you please?"
"No, I don't please, but I guess I have no choice. Superboy, please don't kill me. I kinda need my spine for running."
Superboy grasped Kid Flash's hand, pulling him in for a shoulder bump and patting his back once before stepping back. The redhead opened his eyes cautiously, checking himself over for damage. "I'm alive!" he shouted, zipping around the room in triumph.
"Superboy?" The hero looked at Robin. "I think you got it." Superboy had a genuine smile on his face that was usually only seen while he was talking to Megan.
Kid Flash zoomed over to stand by the Boy Wonder. "Now on to lesson two: when to use the man hug. This gesture of friendliness is appropriate for only certain circumstances, not for everyday greetings."
Robin took up the thread. "The first occasion is victory, whether it's a sporting event or a mission."
Kid Flash butted in. "Yeah, like when your favorite football team wins the Super bowl."
Superboy looked at the speedster blankly. "What's the Super bowl?"
"That's lesson three, I believe," Robin said to Kid Flash, making a note of it.
"Anyway," Kid Flash continued, "the second instance is when you reunite with an old friend, or when said friend has had a close call, a 'brush with death' if you will." He air-quoted at this.
"How close of a brush?"
"Like two millimeters to the left and he would be smushed," Robin said matter of factly. "This is used when they have escaped with only minor injuries or none at all."
"The third occasion is when one bro has done another a 'solid'," Kid Flash finished.
Superboy raised his eyebrows. "A 'solid'?"
"A favor," Robin explained. "Ixnay on the ingolay," he hissed to Kid out of the corner of his mouth. "That's lesson five."
"It's not my fault man hugs come with lingo! That's just how they're done."
Robin rolled his eyes, turning back to the broody teen. "Well Supey, do you think you got it?"
Superboy listed the steps off, counting each one on his fingers. "Grasp hand, pull close, bump shoulders, pat on back, release. And it's used for celebrating a victory, seeing an old friend, a close call, and a 'solid'."
Kid Flash and Robin grinned at each other and high fived over a job well done. "Congratulations Superboy," Robin said. "You have graduated the man hug portion of Bros 101."
"Man hug?" Aqualad had walked in just in time to catch the tail end of Robin's lecture.
Kid Flash smirked at Robin. "Looks like we have another student. I call teacher! This time you can be the test dummy."
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