This is my first story of Twilight. I published in 2009 and reading today decided to change a few things. Not many, but I am more pleased with this one. It is a mother and daughter story, rating M (totally) but the characters belong to Stephenie Meyer, not me.

Summary: Bella needs some help to explore her sexuality and Esme is there for her.

Not a deep nor robust story. Some will like, others not, others will think it is weird, this was just something that I wanted to write.

I knew he was not home. That he would be back tomorrow morning, but I did not feel like going to Charlie's place right now so, here I am. Parked in front of his big, beautiful and full of glasshouse. I wished I lived here too.

Getting out, I ring the bell. No one answers. I try again but nothing. Strange. Even when Edward is not home, someone is. I step down the porch and walk around the house, careful not to slip, to the back. Esme is in the greenhouse. How did she not hear my car, I do not know.

"Esme," I call, knocking on the glass wall.

"Hi, Bella. I did not hear you. Alone with my thoughts." Esme replies, smiling. "How are you?"

"I'm ok. Do you mind if I stay here?"

"Of course not, sweetie, but Edward is not –"

"He is not here. I know. I just did not want to go home." Lately, I feel such a need to be here. Is so comfortable.

Esme takes off her gloves and places on the bench. "Come on, I will get you some juice." She extends a hand and I do not hesitate to get it. Already used to the coldness. I love her. "I have been working for so long that I could use a break and have some company." She beams, wrapping an arm around me.

"I like being with you."

"I am glad you do because I would like to spend more time with you."

We reach the kitchen and I sit on the bench of the island. Esme gets the juice from the fridge, serving in a cup. "Thank you."

"Is Carlisle at the hospital, or he went hunt too?"

"He is at work. He does not like hunting without me. Sometimes I tell him to go with the others because they enjoy it, but he says he can wait for me and we will together with them."

"That is nice. You two truly love each other. Do you think -?"

"Edward loves you."

I chuckle. "I know, I was just wondering if you were both humans, you would feel this strong for one another?"

"Yes. I fell in love with Carlisle when I was human not because he was a vampire, but because he was charming, bright… extremely kind, patient and educated. Did Edward ever tell you how Carlisle and I met?"

"No."

"I fell of a tree and broke my leg. Carlisle was replacing the local doctor where I was born. In Columbus, Ohio. He asked how did that happen and was very careful while tending me. We talked a little bit and I was, hooked. He actually listened to me, even if I was not like most girl at that time and he was beautiful. Still is."

"How old were you?"

"I was sixteen. When I went back for the check up, he was not there. He left to his town. I was heartbroken. I dreamed of the golden angel. I married a man at twenty-one but never forgot him."

"When did you meet him again?"

"I lost my baby, a few days after he was born and I was devastated… Thank you. I had left my husband after I found out I was pregnant because he was not a good man. Charles was not by far a good man but my parents insisted he was the right person for me. He was until we got married. After that, he became… abusive, in every way possible."

"No…"

"I could not raise my child with that monster so I fled. When I lost my baby, I lost everything I ever loved or needed. I had already lost Carlisle and then I lost my baby. I killed myself."

"… How?"

"I jumped off of a cliff."

"The fall did not kill me." Esme goes on when I do not say anything. What can I say? "My heart was still beating, faintly but beating and Carlisle was the only one who heard. He was my doctor once again and he took care of me. Gave me my life back and a life I was ready to live. It was not easy to forget Charles and all he did, but Carlisle was patient and helped me. He may had been a vampire when we meet but his kindness does not come from that. I am sure that, if he was human, and he not left within air, I would have been with him; he is the one for me."

Yes. Carlisle is amazing and they make a beautiful couple. Not just that but are true companions.

"I am sorry about your son. About your first marriage."

"Thank you, sweetie. After something terrible, I found my prince charming."

"Yes. I was going to say that. Exactly that." I smile and focus on the glass, touching the board. I should not be doing that but I do not think the glass will break.

Esme walks toward me. "What is in your mind?"

"How was it, the first time Carlisle touched you… intimately I mean? Was it, good?"

"It was wonderful. Not because we are vampires but because I have never been, treated with such devotion before. It frightened me but thrilled me at the same time. I only knew the short, rough part of sex, but Carlisle; he showed me that it could be slow. It could be incredible. A little discomfort is common the first you have intercourse. I was not a virgin when we did it so it was good from the beginning to the end but loving him, the way I did, made all the different. Carlisle loving me, not just touching me made all the difference too."

"It is alright to be scared of having sex, but I am sure Edward will be very thoughtful and caring when the time comes. Whether you are a vampire or not."

"I feel good when I am with him and I want more than just to kiss him but, I have never done this. Never touched myself or, wanted a person to. I do not know how it should be."

"Would you like me to teach you?"

"You would do that?"

"Yes. If there is anything that I can do, to make you happy, sure of yourself, I will do it."

"I don't know…" I sigh.

"Come on. I saw the look in your eyes, sweetie. You want this. Maybe even need this. Come. Let us go to my room." I stand. "I will wash this glass later."

"Will any of them know? If Alice sees it and Edward is near..."

"I do not know if she saw our decision and will see what we will do, but Alice will know to change focus if she sees you naked. That I am sure."

"… Naked?"

"For the waste down at least. Edward will change focus too at the first glimpse. Not because he does not think you are attractive or wants to see you naked but because Edward is old fashion. He is a prude."

Opening the door, Esme allows me to enter her sanctuary. The only room in the house I have not seen it before. It is beautiful.

"Take off your pants, panties as well."

"Will my scent not be in the room?"

"Yes, but I will make sure it is gone by the time Carlisle comes back. I will be back in a minute."

Esme disappears in the bathroom suite and comes back with a table mirror.

"Have you ever seen your sex?"

"I cannot say that I have." I look down. "When I go the gynaecologist, I do not look… Are you this is a good idea?"

"I think it is. I think it can help you and I am happy to be the person to teach one thing that a mother – if not every mother, should teach their daughters. You are like a daughter to me." a smile forms in my lips as I touch the tall bed. "You might have had sex lessons at school, seen pictures of a woman body inside and out but seeing and touching are two different things." That is true.

"Should I lie down?"

"I do not want to pressure you. For you to feel that you have no choice, Bella."

"I do not feel like that. I trust you. When I am with, I feel good and not pressured. I think I am more anxious to do this then nervous. It is weird."

"I do not think it is. Thank you for giving me a chance to do this."

My sex is pulsing, is hot with the thought of being touched there. It is strange because I am with Esme but it is like this. I lie down against the pillows and Esme comes to the other side of the bed, orders me to pull my legs up and open widely.

"Push your hip all down… Good. Can you see your sex reflected?" Esme holds the mirror where it should be. "Push your skin up and hold it. Look at the shape and the colour. When you are excited, your body produces fluids, the lower lips change colour and separate themselves easily, just like that. Feel it. Feed the excitement. Think whatever you need to continue that way.

"Touching yourself is only good when you are excited… Spread the lower lips more so you can see inside. I am going to point a few things to you and I might need to touch but I will not hurt you."

"I trust you."

Esme explains about the both entrances there, one of my… the other of the urethra and where my clitoris is. The clitoris is the most sensitive part of a woman's body. He must be touched with a finger or another person's skin or the orgasm is not going to happen.

"What?"

"Touch yourself." Esme repeats, pulling the mirror away. "Feel what it does to you when you rub your clitoris… Pass a finger in your sex… Your body knows how to respond if you stimulate this area, darling. You do not need to think just feel. I will be standing beside the bed cabinet in case you have any question or need my help and you just please yourself."

Esme takes position where she said. "Close your eyes." She says lower, "Think of Edward or you. How good you want to feel and touch yourself. Do not rush things until you feel that you need to."

"Take your time. You have time and you are doing the right thing. What every woman should do. Love herself. Feel good being a woman and touching them. You will show Edward what you like and he will love you. Love to make love or touch you. This is right. It is the right thing to do. You should feel good."

Her tone of voice… the words repeating in my mind… thinking of Edward too and how I feel when we kiss… what I want to do – that I now I do how… my breath comes in short and it gets hotter, wetter. I pull myself up but do not stop. My eyes connects with Esme's gold one. Perfect, she mumbles. Do not stop. I get on my knees and groan. Close my mouth tight.

"Slow down… if he does not come at first try, it is alright. It will come in many others… Feel good. The goal is to feel and not orgasm…

"Can I do one thing?" Esme approaches the bed. "I do not want you to feel bad or take advantage of you. Only to help. If you do not like nor want, tell me and I will stop." Slowly Esme settles behind me. "I like when it is done this way and you might as well. Do you trust me?"

I nod, "I do,"

I wince at the coldness of her finger when it touches the top of my centre.

"Edward's hand will be this cold. You will know what to expect when he does this. Relax your hips, your legs. I will support you if necessary," she moves to the side a little. "You are doing great. Beautifully, darling."

"I have a good teacher."

Esme smiles. "I do not matter. You do. How you feel."

"Good. Very, very good. Is it true?" I fear. "That, if he does not come, it will alright?"

"Yes. It will be all right. There will always be another try. Your body functions, the way it should function. Touching here alone will not make your orgasm. Your body will contract. Respond to it but the real orgasm… comes from the mind."

My mind. If my mind is on it… or not anxious or… if I feel good my mind will send the right signal… I nod, "I think I understand."

"You do. You are clever."

"Why did you stop?"

"Because you stopped. You started thinking and tensed. Was no longer enjoying the touch. It killed the mood, so to speak."

"I am sorry." My face falls.

"No." she drawls lovingly. "Do not be. Carlisle taught me that, we are like wood. We all have the potential to start a fire and keep him alive. We only need to find what to use to start and feed the fire. Wood, journal, alcohol, works well in a fireplace. What works with you? What can make you burn again?"

"That is a weird analogy, but it makes sense." I frown and then chuckles.

What would fuel my fire?

I sit on my side, thinking. I was really enjoying my body response. I felt alive…

Esme catches a pillow and tells me to lay on her and I do. Runs the tip of the finger on the internal side of my thigh and I open my legs. She continue running, without a word getting closer to my centre – and pubic hair.

Edward's hand is cold. His body is strong and cold.

I am woman. I love him and he loves me. I do not understand but he does.

"You should start. The cold now might kill the mood for good. Remember… take your time. When you decide you are ready to be with Edward intimately, have sex or have him please you, make sure you two are alone, have no place to go and no one will burst in the room or interfere."

"Do not get straight on it. Do not let him go fast or make decisions without you. You are not an object. You are a woman. You need time. Need a lot of care, to feel food. Not to think and just do what feels good. Things will run smoothly, if you do not push or let him push. If you trust him but more than that, trust you. You did it. You got excited and can fuel the fire."

"Hold your lover, touch him, and speak in a low tone, all of that helps. Kissing helps a lot too but you cannot jump on it."

"I need to feed the fire but if I put too much I will burn and not in a good way."

"Yes. That is about it."

"… Can I do this another time? Will you be upset if we stop?"

"No. This is not about me."

"My centre pulses but I feel good that way. I do not feel the need to touch myself."

"Then you should not do it. The fire is there, ready to be lit again."

Now I know a little more of what to expect. "I will remember and treasure this lesson, mother. You made me feel good being a woman. More secure. I rarely feel that way. Even with Edward, I not always feel… appropriated. A good woman for him. Now I am better."

"You are the only person for him, darling. The one that balances him and gives a reason to exist. That is not as strong for humans as it is for vampires but the fact is, he needs you and you need him."

"I do, desperately." I hold onto one of her arms. Esme caresses my head. "I love him and need more than just a kiss. Thank you for everything. I feel good when I am here but I did not think I would feel this good today."

"I am happy to hear."

"I wish every person in the world had a mother like you. Willing to do this without making it seem embarrassing, not for long. If my birth mother had suggested this, I would have ran. If not, at least said a big no - 'no way'." I would say that in my head but even if I had gone to her to a room to try, it would have been a disaster.

"Why was it easier with me?"

"I do not know. I cannot put into words how I feel only that it felt right. Right to, follow your lead."

"Thank you for your words, I love you and it makes me very happy, very touched that you feel so comfortable with me. Trusts me so. I finally gained a third daughter." Esme cheers, with words in the end.

I laugh. "Will you gain more?"

"No. I do not think so. Unless another vampire wants to join the family, and accept me as one, I will content myself with the ones I have."

"Part of me thinks it is weirds that we truly connect through a sexual, erotic situation… the other part, does not give a damn."

"Language, please."

"Does not care."

"Thank you."

"Can I put my pants on? I am a little cold from my waist down."

"Yes, you can, darling. We are done with the lesson today."

I pull myself up and smile at her.

"Thank you for cooperating with me, for letting me do this again too. Are you hungry? I can make something. I was going to ask downstairs but it did not seem the right time to ask."

"Can I be with you while you make it?

"Then I am hungry. I did not each much at school today."

"I adore you being human." Esme leaves the bed, "I want you to become a vampire - please do not take it the wrong way," and holds the door for me to pass, "but if you were not human, I would not have had company today, a person to cook and to teach how to treat a woman." Feel good as a woman.

We walk downstairs pass the living room and dining room to reach the kitchen. Instead of sitting on the island, I stop at the fridge beside her.

"What would you like to eat, sweetie?"

"A sandwich is fine."

"Are you sure? I made a chicken pie this morning. You can have that with a salad cut I slices and carrots."

"I accept."

She takes from the fridge everything we will need. Cuts a piece of pie and puts on the oven. Brings a board to cut the lettuce. I would offer my help if it was not dangerous to do so. When I ask what she was thinking when I go here and did not hear, she says – Carlisle. What of him? Nothing, just him.