'I sit on the couch, bored as can be,
Numbly listening to the TV
To the library I go, to grab a book I've already read.
The next thing I know, I am suddenly lying on his bed.
I only wanted help to get to sleep.
'Be quiet. Don't utter a single peep'.
I shouldn't be here. I need to get away!
He's too heavy to push off. I have to stay.
The loud sobs and cries of 'no.'
Why is time moving so slow?
All I know is the pain in my head
I didn't want this. I wanted to go to bed.
'That never happened' and "it's just a story.'
I wish I could block it from my memory.
It happened. It happened. It happened. It did.
If I knew what was coming I would have hid.
When he hugged me, I thought it was affection
But most of the time he had an erection.
"It's ok to dress in front of me.
How does that shirt fit? Let me see."
I lived in fear, and under constant threat.
Guessing when he'd attack was always a bet.
Seven agonizing years, full of pain
I shed so many tears, they came like rain
"Don't tell lies! Your Tad cares for you so well."
This house has become my own private hell. '
Jack sets down the piece of paper that had fallen out of Ianto's diary, and covers his eyes with his hand as he struggles to control his emotions. Ianto's father had harmed him, and no one believed him when he tried to get help.
A quiet sound at the door way causes Jack to look up. He feels his heart clench at the pained expression Ianto is wearing. "Please tell me you didn't read it." Jack stands and makes his way to the younger man. "I did. I found it, and didn't know what it was, and I needed to know where to put it." When Ianto doesn't respond, Jack looks at him only to see silent tears welling up in his eyes. "No one ever believed me." Jack wraps the younger man in his arms, and holds him tightly. "It's ok now, Ianto. It's ok. You're safe."
As soon as he's wrapped in Jack's arms, Ianto breaks down, and starts crying on Jack's shoulder, digging his fingernails into Jack's back, as he clings desperately to his boss, as if he's afraid to let go, afraid to be on his own, afraid of being alive. These thoughts swirl in Jack's mind as he presses a gentle kiss to Ianto's head and feels tears roll down his own cheeks. "No one's going to hurt you again. We'll get you through this." Ianto clings tighter to Jack as he is wraps safely in his arms and continues to cry. "You're safe now. You're with me."