Note: Written for Jekkah's birthday, though a bit late. Season 3 AU, pre-'Penelope'; for the purpose of this story Hotch's divorce was finalized in the late summer before S3 started. Hope you like it Jekkah and happy belated birthday!

Disclaimer: Still not mine. If they were, I wouldn't be writing AUs. Nor do I own the song or characters from the Star Wars franchise.

Penelope Garcia was a woman who knew her talents and was proud of her ability to use them to help her friends. Sure, her computer skills were in high demand during cases but she was particularly proud of her ability to make her friends smile when they returned. Sure, sometimes it took a day or two, especially after the really bad cases. But this was becoming a truly serious situation.

The team had returned mid-Friday afternoon and she'd managed to make both her delicious chocolate god and her newest home girl laugh within an hour of their return, their resident genius within two. As for their newest addition, Mr. David Rossi, well, he'd smiled at her on his way out the door for the weekend and that counted in her book. JJ was a little harder, especially since she'd buried herself in her office when they'd returned, but she'd managed it when she dragged her fellow blond out for a Saturday brunch. The boss man on the other hand….he was often her biggest challenge but right now she was getting downright worried!

She hadn't thought anything of it on Friday; it almost always took a day or two to make him smile after a tough case, even for her. She'd stayed away from the office over the weekend, like any sane person, so she hadn't seen him then. But come Monday afternoon, when he was still short-tempered, she stepped up her efforts, to no avail. Now, at lunch-time on Wednesday, he beloved Boss Man was even grumpier than before and she was officially worried about him. Lunch with Reid, Morgan, Prentiss and Rossi hadn't offered any insight to his continued bad mood. So, since subtle methods hadn't worked, it was time to be a little more direct. So to that end she marched straight to JJ's office after lunch, the rest of the team trailing behind her like a bunch of ducklings and entered her friend's office with the barest of knocks.

"Jayje, you've got to help. This is getting scary!"

To her credit, JJ didn't show any sign of the start her friend had given her with her sudden entrance, only looking up from her file with every appearance of calm, "What's getting scary Pen?" Eyeing the group that had gathered in her office she sighed and gestured to the seats in front of her desk, "Sit down and tell me what's going on."

Garcia plopped into one of the seats, Reid gingerly sitting in the other, "It's Hotch; he's acting cranky. I mean, not his usual level of cranky but ready-to-rip-someone's-head-off cranky. I know the last case was rough but he's not usually this bad for this long. I mean, ok, I know that…"

JJ blinked and looked at Morgan as Garcia trailed off, "Translation?"

Morgan leaned against the closed door with a half-amused, half-worried look, "She's worried about Hotch. He's been a bear all week and none of us know why. We were hoping you might have an idea."

"Why me?"

"Because you're like, the Hotch Whisperer!" At JJ's confused look the techie went on, "You get him Jayje, he talks to you. Why's he so cranky these days? Was it the case?"

JJ sighed as the pieces clicked into place, "No Pen, it's not the case, at least not all of it. Hotch just has a lot on his mind these days."

Rossi spoke up from his position near her file cabinet, "Care to share with the rest of us? Because at this point I'm about ready to play 'The Imperial March' every time he leaves his office. He makes Darth Vader look positively friendly these days."

JJ had to cover her mouth with her hand to hide her snicker at the thought of Hotch's reaction to that idea, (Prentiss didn't quiet succeed in her attempt at the same,) but she managed to sober quickly at the concerned looks on her friends' faces. They really were worried about Hotch and he obviously hadn't said anything, even to Rossi, about what was going on, so….

"Haley's been giving Hotch trouble when it comes to him seeing Jack over the last few weeks. When it came to the divorce he gave her her way on a lot of things, in order to keep things as amicable as possible. But now she's giving him a hard time because he's not there to see Jack when we're on cases but when he's home she makes excuses. He was supposed to have Jack this past weekend but Haley took him to her parents' on Friday and didn't come home until Sunday night. Hotch hasn't seen him in the last couple of days either. I know that he's trying to keep things civil but Haley isn't making it easy. That's why he's been in a bad mood." She paused and gave each of them a stern look before continuing, "Do not say anything to him about it…no lawyer offers, no sympathetic speeches, nothing. Just…"

The ringing of her phone cut her off and she hit the speaker button, "Jareau."

Hotch's voice floated through the speaker, sounding, to Garcia, colder than she'd ever heard directed at anyone on the team, "JJ, have you seen Morgan or Prentiss? I need them to update me on the status of the Cincinnati case."

To her friends' surprise, JJ didn't seem to react to his tone at all, "Sorry Hotch, I haven't seen them," she directed a stern look towards her teammates and softened her tone slightly, "but if I do, I'll send them your way."

"Thanks JJ." The frost in his tone had melted somewhat but the call disconnected without any further conversation, leaving the team staring at their media liaison in disbelief. Rossi was the first to break the silence.

"Wow. You're good." Not only was she able to lie convincingly to Hotch of all people, but she got him to calm a bit in the space of two sentences. He was impressed.
"And you all owe me one. Now scram, I held him off but I'm not covering your butts all afternoon. And don't worry…I'll talk to him."

"Thanks Jayje!" In the interest of getting to her office and out of the potential range of her boss's temper, Garcia jumped up and gave her friend a hug, "I'll catch you later!"

"Later Pen." JJ watched as the team trailed out of her office and shook her head. They weren't the only ones worried; she'd been planning to talk to Hotch anyways but their visit had just bumped up her timeline a bit.

Little did she know that her friends had peeled off into an empty office a couple of doors down to continue their discussion. Rossi, once again, was the first to say something, "Well, that explains a lot."

Morgan grimaced, "Yeah, but what do we do about it?"

Reid spoke up for the first time since lunch, his tone even more thoughtful than usual, "It might be best to just let it lie for now. Pestering Hotch will only anger him. And if anyone can get Hotch to cool down, it's JJ; she's always been the best at calming his temper." He looked startled when Rossi and Garcia both turned to look at him with expressions that could only be described as smirks, "What, did I say something wrong?"

"Reid, you're a genius!"

"What does that have to do with…?"

The shrill ring of Morgan's cell phone interrupted him and the older profiler groaned at the name on the display before turning to his female counterpart, "It's Hotch. We'd better jet."

"I'm right behind you." And the sooner the better. She might not have been with the team all that long but Prentiss knew that there were only a few things to fear when it came to her teammates, two of which were Hotch's temper and Garcia's ability to make mischief. And judging by the looks on her and Rossi's faces, she wanted no part of whatever scheme they were plotting. Plausible deniability was the way to go! "Let's get up there before he comes looking for us." They left quickly with Reid trailing behind them, leaving the two resident schemers behind.

When the door had closed behind them, Rossi smirked at the blonde tech, "Y'know, I've noticed a number of interesting things around here since I came back. And I'm thinking that you might be the one to help me resolve some of them. Am I right?"

Garcia flashed him a grin that was as bright as a beacon, "If by that you mean cheering up the Boss Man and maybe even opening the eyes of our respective best friends, then I already have something in mind. We're on stand down for the rest of the week and Halloween is almost here…I'd say it's the perfect weekend for a costume party. You?"

"All the way Kitten, all the way."

"Yes! I'm thinking sci-fi theme and thanks to you, I already know the perfect costumes for the Boss Man and my Buttercup. I'll catch the others this afternoon and let them know, and then snag Hotch in the morning. I just need you to be prepared to talk him around if necessary."

Rossi grinned at the slightly maniacal gleam in her eyes, "You got it Kitten; he'll be there. I guarantee it."