Ruth felt her heart race as she listened to the operation she was currently observing. Harry was out in the field which made her more worried than usual. There had been two gunshots and nothing but static over the radio. "Alpha one can you hear me?"

Nothing but static and Ruth felt fear deep in her stomach. Suddenly the static cleared and she could hear Dimitri over the line.

"Get an ambulance down here Ruth."

She nodded at Tariq, who did that. "Are you both all right?"

"Yeah," Dimitri said. "Harry's injured but he should be fine."

"How injured?" Ruth asked before she could stop herself.

"I'm fine," Harry said, voice low and cracked.

"Good," Ruth said, the relief colouring her voice before she could stop it. "And Vorena?" she asked, the Italian drug and arms smuggler they'd been tailing.

"Dead," Harry said. "I'm fine. Just a bit bruised."

"Okay." Ruth took her headset off and closed her eyes.

"He's okay," Jo said, a hand on Ruth's shoulder as she could guess the turmoil she was going through. "Don't worry."

"I'm fine," she lied, shrugging Jo's reassuring hand off of her shoulder. She left the grid, grabbing her bag to go to the hospital. They'd said Harry was injured, so she wanted to be there for him. It didn't matter what people said, she had to be there.

"Miss Evershed, before you go in to see Mr Pearce, I have to warn you about his injury," the doctor said, impossibly young with a clipboard chart in front of him, barring the way to his room.

"He's going to be all right?" Ruth asked concerned. She'd been in the waiting room for nearly two hours before this man had come and found her to bring her to Harry.

"Oh yes, health wise he will be absolutely fine." Ruth sighed with relief. "But, he had some chemical of some description thrown in his face. It hasn't done any external damage at all, but I'm afraid he's lost his sight."

"What?" Ruth asked quietly. That made absolutely no sense to her. She couldn't comprehend it.

"He's blind." The words dropped from the doctors mouth as if in a different language. She simply could not understand it.

"It will pass though," she said desperately. "Won't it?"

"It seems permanent," the doctor said. "It's an untested and untried chemical agent so we don't know the long term effects. But there was no response from his eyes to all our tests. No response to light or stimulation. I'm sorry. It looks to be... permanent."

"Oh my God," she said quietly. "Does he know?"

"Yes," the doctor said. "He's… understandably upset."

"Does he want to see me?" Ruth asked, stuttering slightly. "I mean… has he asked for me?"

"Yes," the doctor said. "I wouldn't have been able to confide any patient information otherwise." The doctor looked embarrassed. "I will leave you with him."

"Thank you," Ruth said. When alone she looked at the door, willing herself to open it. She didn't know how Harry would cope with this. Something as simple as not being able to see? No doubt he would be angry. Incredibly angry. So much so that she almost feared going into his hospital room. But that would be cowardly and far less than he deserved. So she opened the door.

"Who's there?" he asked sharply

"It's me," she said quietly. "Ruth."

"Oh," he said, his voice quiet and almost broken as he relaxed back against the pillows. She looked at him for a moment. His eyes were open but unfocused. There was no emotion behind them. His face was completely blank and she knew that he'd locked his feelings up tightly.

"If you don't want me here I can leave," she said, walking further into the room anyway.

"No," he said. "Please. Don't leave."

"Okay," she said, her voice very soft as she sat next to him. "Then I won't." His hand rested on the bed sheets and very gently, she wrapped her fingers around his palm. He grasped hold of her as if she were a lifeline. His touch was warm, his grip tight on her palm. For minutes, neither of them spoke, his fingers tracing the back of her hand lightly. She watched as his touch became softer. Without meaning to, she leaned closer and kissed his cheek. His free hand touched his face where she'd kissed him and he shook his head.

"You can't do that any more Ruth," he said.

"Why not?"

"Because its not fair to you," he said. "We can't… carry on what we've started." She looked at his face and saw what this was costing him to say. He still had hold of her hand though.

"Harry, I know this is impossible for you," she said slowly. "I know that. But pushing me away isn't going to help."

"Ruth, I can't bear your pity," he said. "I'd rather be alone than have you… feeling sorry for me all the time. And I know you, you're not going to walk away from a blind man."

"No, you're right," she said. "I'm not. And by the way, its not pity I feel."

"Ruth…"

"I mean it," she said, squeezing his hand. "You can't just tell me to go away."

Harry swallowed away the lump in his throat. "Can I… touch your face?" he asked, his voice small. Ruth nodded, before remembering that would have no effect at all. So she took his hand and put it on her cheek. Very gently his thumb traced the contours of her face, following her eyebrow, softly going over her eyelashes before following the curve of her cheek. He moved across and did it on the other side of her face and Ruth was struck by how gentle he was being.

"Thank you," he said, dropping his hand back to the bed. Ruth covered it with her own. Neither of them spoke, neither of them knew what to say in this untenable situation.

How mean am I? But Ruth will obviously have the opportunity to look after him.