Disclaimer: I still don't own Aangie. Sadly. I'd love to own him. Cutest cartoon character ever.
Much thanks to Michael for the beta.
What Were You Dreaming Of?
If someone had told Zuko just a couple of weeks ago that he would cross half the world to join the Avatar, not to catch him or kill him, he would have laughed them in the face. Now, here he was in the Western Air Temple, by some truly welcomed, by some grudgingly accepted, but undoubtedly admitted to the Gaang.
It felt nice to belong. He had long forgotten what it was like to truly belong somewhere, to someone. For years it had only been Uncle Iroh to whom Zuko had felt any sort of attachment, then for a fleeting few weeks to Mai, but he had to admit that he had never truly had friends. Now he had a chance to have some. The perspective was so exciting, so exhilarating that it made it impossible for him to fall asleep.
For hours and hours he kept tossing and turning until he felt all his efforts to find some rest were in vain. To worsen his predicament, it was the hottest time of summer and all the heat the temple walls had absorbed at daytime radiated into his room overnight, turning it into a living furnace, sweltering and suffocating. Even a firebender has moments he cannot stand the heat, and this was definitely one of those moments for Zuko.
With a sigh he got up. Perhaps a bit of fresh air would calm him and clear his head.
Careful to cross the corridors as silently as possible – particularly around Katara's bedroom, not wanting to wake her and give her another reason for suspicion – he arrived at the terrace with the fountain. Even from a distance he could feel the fresh, soothing spray of water on his face. Perhaps he should dip into the pool and splash around a bit, he thought. It was not like anyone could see him now and think that the Firelord's heir was acting like a little boy…
As he approached the fountain, he realised he wasn't alone: there was a figure hunched by the edge of the terrace. Could it be an assassin? Could someone have followed him? Had he unintentionally led an outsider to the Avatar's hideout?
Ready to strike, he crept closer. He had taken only a couple of steps when the intruder stiffened as though they had noticed his approach. Zuko could see it now that it was a tiny person, perhaps not an assassin, after all. He conjured a flame on his palm to have a look at his night time companion. The fire's orange glow fell upon the scared face of the Avatar.
"Oh, it's just you," the boy breathed, his shoulders sagging in relief.
The fire prince arched an eyebrow at Aang. A sentence like 'oh, it's just you' would have felt downright weird just a couple of days earlier. It still felt slightly odd.
"Yes, it's just me," Zuko replied. "Why, who were you expecting?"
"Er… no one," Aang let out a small, nervous chuckle, "but I'm so glad it's you and not… someone else."
"You're glad it's me, huh? Now, that's a real change from old times," Zuko couldn't fight down the urge to smile. "Care to tell me what you're doing here in the middle of the night, dressed in… er… barely anything?"
As much as Zuko could tell in the meagre light of his fire, the Avatar blushed furiously and began arranging his monk robes which he wasn't wearing slung over his shoulder like he usually did but wrapped around his waist while his pants hung dripping wet in his grip. Apparently he had been washing the latter, but not in the fountain pool, but in the water flowing out of the fountain and down the side of the canyon. Curious.
"I just…" Aang rubbed the back of his neck which Zuko assumed was a sign of embarrassment. "I… er… had a little accident."
"Accident?" Zuko blinked. Well, that would explain why Aang wouldn't want to dirty the pool. "Er… sorry to hear that. Sokka said he thought the dinner tasted funny, but my stomach had no problem with it..."
"What? Not that kind of accident!" Aang said hastily, almost scandalised, then blushed an even deeper shade of crimson, realising that he had just worsened his already awkward situation.
"No? Then…?" Zuko's eyes widened. "Oh. Aren't you too young for that kind of thing?"
"Technically, I'm too old for that kind of thing. Recently turned one hundred and thirteen," Aang replied self-consciously.
"Really? Well, then you should be grateful that at such a ripe old age your body still functions the way it should. Hey…" Zuko was surprised by the sudden rush of boldness that came over him, "what exactly were you dreaming of?" He wasn't exactly the type to discuss 'guy stuff', but it gave him a thrill to be able to do so for a change, especially with someone close to his own age. At least closer than Iroh, if he didn't count the century Aang had spent in his icy prison.
"Uh… you know…" Aang bent the water out of his pants and began pulling them on, "during the invasion I… I kinda… kissed Katara."
"Kissed her? Where?"
"On top of the submarine."
"No, I mean, where?"
"On the lips, of course," Aang drew himself up, the shy little boy of just a moment ago gone in an instant.
"And?"
"And what?"
"How did she react?"
"Well… she blushed, I guess, but I flew away before anything else could happen, so…"
"So you continued the kiss scene in your dream," Zuko drew the conclusion, his lips once again tucking into a smile.
"Yeah, sort of," Aang admitted with a chuckle.
"Weren't you scared?"
"Sure I was. Scared to death. But I thought I might not survive the invasion and it might be my one and only chance. I had to try."
"No, I mean… weren't you scared tonight to find yourself… all uncomfortable when you woke up?" Zuko could well remember his own first time – the shock, the embarrassment, the fear that he was seriously ill. His father had never cared to prepare him for these things. Had his uncle not been available for a talk, he might have gone crazy not knowing what was happening to him.
"Scared? Nope," Aang shrugged. "I knew it was coming, though. Gyatso told me it would."
"Gyatso?"
Aang flopped down on the fountain ledge. In the aura of Zuko's flames his face was pale and sad, and, despite the youthful features, ancient, just like the spirit that dwelt inside him.
"Gyatso was my mentor at the Southern Air Temple," he said slowly, his eyes fixed upon the falling water, but it seemed as he were not looking at the fountain but something invisible to all eyes but his. Perhaps he was watching something that transcended space and time, his lips curled into a bitter smile. "My best friend. My almost-father."
Zuko felt a heavy weight settle on his chest. "And the Fire Nation killed him, I suppose."
The younger boy nodded. "When I found his remains I became so mad that I nearly destroyed everything around me. I almost hurt Katara and Sokka. If she hadn't pulled me back… if she hadn't told me that she and Sokka would be my new family… I don't know what would have happened. It's always her who pulls me back from the edge. She's my anchor. Without her... I don't know what would become of me."
"You love her," the prince perceived.
"More than anything," Aang said simply. "I'm not sure if one is allowed to love that much. I fear that love of such magnitude might just… ruin something, someday, somehow."
"Well, it certainly has ruined your pants," Zuko tried joking to ease the younger boy's mind, but he knew his attempt was a feeble one, pathetic even.
Aang, however, proved to be a person easily brightened, and let out a giggle, "Yeah. Just don't tell her that. I'd die of shame if she ever found out."
"Don't worry, I won't," Zuko smiled back for the third time in only a couple of minutes. He had never been a man of many smiles despite his uncle's best efforts to cheer him, but the Avatar's company seemed to have that effect on him. Aang's sunny disposition was contagious, and Zuko found he didn't mind it one bit. Aang returned his smile with childish glee, putting all his teeth on display, and Zuko's heart sank once again.
For years and years the Avatar had been nothing but prey and trophy for him, someone he had to present to his father on a silver plate – someone with powers so divine he couldn't possibly be human. But now Zuko saw the human in Aang – the fragile, vulnerable orphan who tried to spread peace and love and happiness while he himself was anything but happy. Deep down he was hurting. He might hide behind a thousand smiles, bury his sorrow in laughter so loud it would reverberate throughout the temple, yet his heart would still be bleeding for his lost people. And for a girl.
Zuko flopped down next to Aang on the stone ledge. "You know," he began uneasily, never having been good at this kind of thing, "I don't think your love for Katara would ever truly ruin anything. Why do you think it would?"
"Before my fall at Ba Sing Se," Aang said quietly, pulling his legs up to circle them with his arms, "I went to visit a guru who promised to teach me to control the Avatar State. He told me how to open my seven chakras, and I managed to open six, but for the seventh I should have let Katara go. I couldn't do that. I was so selfish that I just couldn't. When I finally decided I would try to let her go, it was too late and I went down. Azula killed me."
"She did, didn't she?" Zuko frowned. "I always thought she did. But I expect Katara used the Spirit Oasis water on you. She saved you. She loved you. She loves you."
"I know she does… but only as a friend. Or a brother. I don't know why I ever imagined she'd love me in any other way. I'm such an idiot."
"I don't think you are. And I don't think she loves you only as a friend or a brother."
Aang looked up from examining his knees. "What makes you think that?"
"Yesterday, after Sokka showed me to my room, Katara visited me. She threatened to kill me if I so much as harmed a hair of your head."
"It'd be difficult to harm a hair of my head," Aang laughed, running a hand across his shaven dome, then stiffened when Zuko's words sank in. "Honestly? She did that?"
"Yeah. You should have seen her. She didn't look like a friend worried for a friend or a sister worried for a brother. There was fire in her eyes. Fire that…" Zuko twitched his fingers, making the flames flicker and grow a bit, "burns for you. I'm quite sure of that."
Aang's eyes widened and his grin that had earlier appeared to be a mere façade seemed anything but fake now. It was the most genuine, most heart-felt smile the fire prince had ever seen. The boy was practically glowing even without his eyes and tattoos doing so. There was an inner light shining through his smile, and the way he trembled with excitement… he looked downright cute. Zuko had never imagined he would think of the Avatar as cute. It was a disturbing thought.
"Thanks, Zuko," Aang said once he calmed down enough to be able to speak. "It means a lot. Even… even if you're wrong, it means a lot that you care enough to try and console me. I never imagined that you and I could be like this. You know… confidential and all."
"Same here. I never expected you to accept me. Not after all I've done."
"Everyone deserves a second chance."
"Second?" Zuko snorted. "I'm already on my umpteenth one."
"But I trust you not to bungle up this one," Aang said, and to Zuko's surprise reached out and patted his shoulder. "I trust you. Something is telling me you will earn it. You already have, at least a little bit. You have given me hope that I could become a firebender… and that I could win Katara's heart someday."
"I have given you hope?" If that wasn't ironic, Zuko didn't know what was. "Isn't it supposed to be the other way around? You giving the world hope?"
"I need to have hope myself in order to pass it on to others, don't I?" Aang replied gently.
Zuko was feeling more and more awkward by the second. The Avatar opening up to him like that was unexpected, to say the least. It had a 'too good to be true' feel about it. But the warmth of the Avatar's hand on his shoulder was real, and so was his smile and trust. It was a trust Zuko knew he would never betray. Never again.
"I guess we should go back to sleep now," he stood up, relieved to be rid of the younger boy's closeness; charisma on this scale was overwhelming. "You should be in top form tomorrow for your first firebending lesson."
"Sure thing, Sifu Hotman," Aang smirked and hopped up from the fountain ledge.
Zuko could only roll his eyes at the nickname. He was too tired to comment on it, but if the Avatar decided to use it on a regular basis, he'd give him a piece of his mind. Charismatic or not, Aang was still a child and his pupil.
"Hey, Zuko…"
"Yes?"
"It was nice to be able to talk to someone about… you know."
"Girls?"
"Yeah. It's not like I could discuss this with Sokka. Not without getting a boomerang in the face."
"Or in another body part," Zuko added, making Aang flinch. "Well, good night." On a whim, he added what his uncle used to tell him with the best of intentions, earning only a grudging acknowledgement from his adolescent nephew, "Sweet dreams."
"Sweet?" It was the first time Zuko heard the Avatar snort. "Thanks, but that's the last thing I need. One sweet dream for a night was more than enough."
The fire prince laughed out, not caring he might wake the rest of the Gaang. Shortly Aang joined in, their laughter echoing across the canyon.
This was new to Zuko: his diaphragm aching, his lungs screaming for air, his vision blurred with tears – and all because of laughter. If this was what being member of the Avatar's inner circle came with, he was more than happy to have joined.
Slowly their laughter dwindled to giggles, finally to wheezes and silent grins. As they walked towards their respective rooms, Zuko couldn't help but think and hope that this was the beginning of a lifelong friendship.
FIN
A/N: reviews would be welcome. Also, if you liked this, be sure to check out my other short ATLA fanfics, especially "No Way!" which is loosely linked to this one. :)
