GASP! IT'S A FIC WHERE KANDA IS THE UKE! (kinda. or should i say KANDA LOLLERS)

Tailor-Made

It was yet another dreary day in the Dark Order where the four friends met for lunch.

OH WAIT JUST KIDDING.

Allen had been notably absent from the lunch room ever since he had that Billy Mays revelation*. Komui had promptly appointed him the Tailor of the Dark Order, at least in this branch. The exorcists had been surviving on factory-made-to-order coats, which had served them well, but were now frayed and damaged from their battles. Allen delightedly accepted the position and today was the last day where he had been holed up in his "office" (an unoccupied room next to his own) undistinguishable from the mountains of fabric save for his head of snowy white hair. At first, Timcampi had brought up his meals, making at least twenty trips up and down from the cafeteria to the 50th floor until Jerry, having taken pity on the poor golem, sent a cart stocked with food up. Blessed was the poor Finder bastard that was forced to wheel it up the 50 flights of stairs.

Today was finally Kanda's turn to get a fitting for a new coat and Allen, in his dank room, shivered in anticipation. He had developed a crush on the handsome Japanese teen and fully intended to use today's alone time with him to find out the measurements of his-

"...Moyashi?" Kanda's head peered out from behind the door and wrinkled his face in disgust at the old room. "Nice office." Allen quickly wiped the drool off his mouth. "It's only temporary! AND IT'S ALLEN!" Kanda smirked and all of a sudden Allen's throat went dry.

"Y-you're...wearing skinny jeans?" His eyes were glued to Kanda's lower body. HE OWNED SKINNY JEANS? "Quit staring, it's rude," Kanda growled, flushing. "The notice said to wear tight clothes...so I-" "-wore tight clothes, yeah, I got it. Let's um, let's get you fitted." Allen quickly averted his eyes but he couldn't ignore that Allen Jr. had woken up. It wasn't helping matters that Kanda had to turn around and walk like that up to the platform.

Damn him, thought Allen as he fumbled for his measuring stick. He's probably doing this on purpose! With shaking hands, Allen began to do the necessary measurements starting with Kanda's arms and legs. He circled Kanda's waistline, intentionally grazing Kanda Jr. when a cold hand stopped him and Allen looked up into the stony stare he knew so well. Had he gone too far?

"I don't want a new Exorcist coat. I want you to repair my old one."

Anticlimactic.

Allen nervously tugged his hand free as Kanda stepped down from the platform. "Kanda, I can't! Komui's orders were-" "Screw Komui," Kanda hissed. They were both still for a moment before something in Allen snapped and the measuring stick fell to the floor.

"I'd rather screw you," he said in a husky voice, before pushing Kanda against the mirrored wall and kissing him passionately.

Let's take a look into Kanda's thoughts, shall we?

..

what the-

..

Mmm.

..

HOLYSHITI'MKISSINGTHEBEANSPROUT

..

FUCK THIS IS HOT OH YEAH

Allen had begun to grind his hips into Kanda's, making infuriatingly tight circles against the older teen's pelvis, making him cry out in pleasure. At some point, his shirt had come off hurriedly and was now lying forgotten in the corner of the room. In one swift motion, Allen had taken his pants off leaving him naked. The white-haired teen's hands cupped his butt cheeks before his talented hands started working on his erect penis. Seeing the reflected images of himself and the Brit in the throes of passion only intensified the mind-blowing experience.

"Kanda...you have no idea how long I've wanted this." whispered Allen as he licked a hot trail from his neck to his collarbone.

"Ngh..Allen..hahh..More.." The Japanese teen could only moan in response, seeing stars as Allen replaced his hands with his dick, thrusting in over and over again in that tight heat. His mind was in a pleasure-induced daze as he threw his head to the side and widened his legs, allowing for wider access. Allen captured his lips in a heated kiss, leaving Kanda panting for air as he rode out his orgasm.

The two collapsed on top of of a heap of fabric and laid there. Kanda turned over to look at Allen, who was on cloud nine.

"I'm still not getting a new coat." Okay. Off of cloud nine.

"..Do you want me to fuck the free will out of you?" Allen could feel Kanda shiver with anticipation.

"I wouldn't mind," he said, eyebrow raised. Dark eyes gazed at grey tenderly. Suddenly, someone knocked on the door. "Allen-kun, I've come to get my measurements!"

"SHIT!" Allen had forgotten that more people had scheduled to get fittings and repairs. Kanda turned his face away to supress a laugh. Allen kissed him tenderly before sending him off fully clothed half an hour later (not because they did a quickie, but because it was so hard to find their clothes amidst the mess in the room. Though the quickie would've been more satisfying).

An elderly nun came in, oblivious to what had just happened in the room. She smiled guilelessly at Kanda, who squirmed under the light of her wholesome smile and he limped out of the room, guiltily saying his goodbyes to Allen. "So...good talk..."

As the door closed, Kanda could hear the elderly woman innocently ask Allen, "Will you two have time to talk later?"

Allen smiled, "Hopefully we'll be...doing a lot of talking.."

LATER DURING THE OLD LADY'S FITTINGS:

"Allen-kun...why are these fabrics stained?"
"Um..."

LATER ON AT THE LUNCH TABLE THE NEXT DAY:

"Kanda...I never did measure the size of your-"
"BANANAS! COME GET YOUR BANANAS!" Jerry was ecstatic about his new shipment of fruit. Kanda couldn't help but chuckle. "I know, Moyashi. Do you think you can squeeze me in today?"

Allen was all ready with a reply: "I think I'd rather squeeze you in somewhere else."

*REFERENCE TO MY OTHER STORY ;) sorry for not updating in a while, i'll try to get another piece up in the next few weeks! REVIEW PWEASE

Hey guys, I'm not really sure about my plans for any future fics. I still have to finish that extra chapter on my yoga story, so that's something to look forward to.

I might do another pairing or something. Tohru/Kyo? Anyway, I'll let you know my oh-so-honorable intentions soon.