It began just like any other night. Kyubey was sitting at home on the couch beating his meat to Fast Car by Tracy Chapman, when, around 4 a.m., as usual, he got the munchies. At first he thought about getting some Taco Bell chalupas, but then remembered that the cashier at Taco Bell had filed a restraining order against him, and going there would be in violation of that. He then decided to make cookies.

He went to his kitchen to gather ingredients. He had most of the ingredients he needed: milk, butter, goat semen, eggs. But alas, when he went into the pantry he found that he had no flour. Just perfect. Kyubey could have bought some more flour at the convenience store down the street, which was open 24 hours, but Kyubey was lazy and did not like to spend money, so he decided to take some from his ripe and fragrant neighbor, Mineta.

Kyubey ran across the street to Mineta's crooked house and knocked furiously on the door. A small young man who looked like a Steven Universe knock-off kewpie doll soon came to the door. "Hey Kyubey."

Kyubey's white face flushed bright red. "Oh, um, hi Mineta. I was just wondering, if I could, um, borrow some, uh... Some flour?" An awkward silence grew between the two.

"Some flour? Well I could give you my flour," the midget said, "but I don't think that's what you're really after. I think what you really want is my armpits." Kyubey stood in silence. It was true. Ever since he laid eyes on the small human, Kyubey had been drawn to his juicy pits. Never before had Kyubey seen such perfect armpits. Not too hairy. Not to sweaty. Absolutely perfect.

"You are right," Kyubey admitted, "I have always admired your glorious pits."

"Well come have a taste." Mineta lifed his arm exposing his tasty pit of glory. Kyubey leaped into fruity one's hand, and Mineta rubbed small creature's face into his underarm. Kyubey was engrossed by the smell of Mineta's pits. They had a wounderful, unique scent. They smelled of a mixture of beef juice and pool water with a hint of Aspercreme. The aroma reminded Kyubey of his grandmother. Kyubey stuck out his tongue and began to lick. He was taken aback by the savory taste of beans and bacon mixed with cat food. Delicious.

"Have you had enough of my pits yet?" Mineta asked.

"No. Keep going."

"Okay then."

The smol boi the lowered his arm, holding Kyubey in his armpit. Kyubey was completely surrounded by sweaty walls of flesh. He was completely submerged in the tastes and smells of this sweaty heaven. It was like going back to his childhood. Kyubey never wanted to leave this sweaty paradise.

Kyubey awoke the next morning on his neighbor's couch, covered in the most wonderful aroma. Mineta lay collapsed next to him. Truly one of the best nights of Kyubey's life. He crawled over to his unconcious neighbor and gave his armpit one last sniff. He never got the flour he needed and was not able to make the cookies he wanted, but instead got something far more tasty and delicious. His grandmother would be proud. Truly one of the tastiest nights of Kyubey's life.