Disclaimer: I do not on YYH. Sadly, it belongs to Yoshihiro Togashi-sama.

A/N: This is a fanfiction I wrote when I got bored. Not my best, but I don't think it's my worst, either. Warning! This is a Hiei/Yukina pairing. If you don't approve, then please make use of your back button and find something else to do. Helpful crticism will be loved and nurtured, whereas flames will be laughed at and deleted. This is a one-shot and will not be continued. Unless, of course, I get extremely bored and feel like torturing Yukina again.

Missing

Slow, sad music sounding from the speakers. Amy Lee's (the band Evanescence) voice soon joining that music, singing words to match the angsty melody. Rain lashing against the window. This is my ideal environment. Has been for almost a year now. Ever since that day, when--

No! I can't think of that day. I know from past experience that recalling that day will only bring the pain again.

Lightning flashes across the sky. A small smile tugs at the corners of my mouth. Not a happy smile, just a reflex of sorts. There is no warmth left within my heart; surely none is left to spare for even a simple smile.

Suddenly, I hear a knock on my door. I ignore it. They're only here to pity me; they pretend to understand what I've been through--what I'm still going through. I find it insulting, really. They have no idea of my pain.

"Yukina-chan?" comes the voice, female, outside the door. "Can I come in?"

Silence meets her request.

"I'm coming in..." The door opens, revealing Keiko Yukimura standing there, holding a tray of food. I ignore her.

"Won't you please eat something, Yukina-chan? At least talk to us. Why won't you eat?!"

This stirs a reaction from me. I turn slowly to stare at her, my eyes blank. They haven't changed for a year. My voice, too, seems dead, empty. It's hoarse from disuse.

"We all die eventually. I don't see a reason as to why I can't speed up the process."

Amusement flashes through my mind at her shocked expression. She seems so appalled by the thought of death. Doesn't she know that once you embrace the thought of death, you let go of all fear?

"Yukina! You can't do that! Think of your friends!! What will we do if we lose you? We already lost--"

"GET OUT!!" I shout, cutting her of before she can utter that single word, the word that would send me into such torment I'd surely lose my mind.

That is, of course, on the assumption I haven't already.

Shocked and frightened, the ningen girl backs out and shut the door again. I can hear her footsteps as she races away, no doubt in search of someone who might be able to "help" me.

A small sigh escapes me. They just won't give up. Fine, then, I'll make them give up. I'll give them reason to leave me alone.

Standing, I don the now-familiar black cloak. An inheritance, if you will. It once belonged to my older brother, though everyone around here already knows that.

As I make my way to the window, lightning once again lights up the stormy night sky. The storm is gathering strength. Good. I much prefer dark, stormy nights to calm, peaceful ones.

The thunder shakes the house as I leap out the window. Instantly, I become soaked by the torrents of rain. I pull the black cloak tighter, though it does nothing to warm the chill that has crept into my body.

Standing on the ground, I tilt my head back, allowing the falling droplets to pelt my face. Such a nice night for what I'm about to do. A small, cold smirk poises itself upon my numb lips. That heartlessness finds its way to my eyes, narrowing the ruby gems until I could easily pass as my brother's little sister.

I leap into a tree, standing for a moment on the branch, before leaping into the neighboring tree. Then again, into the tree next to that one, repeating this process until I come to an abrupt stop. This surprises me. I feel my mouth turn down in a frown as I gaze at the clearing my feet have brought me to. Recognizing it almost instantly, my eyes widen in fear. I leap to the ground, and just in time. Pain seizes my body almost as soon as my feet touch the ground. I fall to my knees, wrapping my arms around my chest in a desperate attempt to keep myself together as the hole where my lungs and heart should be threatens to devour me completely. Of course, there is no real, bleeding wound, but my chest feels like it's being ripped open. Each breath is a struggle, and it feels as if someone is taking a serrated blade to the raw edges of that hole.

After several long hours--or was it minutes?--the pain dissipates enough for me to force myself to my feet. Though my breath is still coming in ragged gasps, I'm able to focus.

I shouldn't be here. This place triggers the pain; it's very familiar. "He" and I used to come here every day...

Then the flashbacks come, ripping open the wound in my chest anew. As I fall to the ground, nearly writhing in pain, memories I'd tried so hard to suppress come flooding back. They are mere glimpses, but enough to torment me.

Flashback

His strong arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me against his chest in a comforting embrace.

'Don't cry, Yukina-chan,' he said, and I realized tears had been falling from my crimson pools. 'I'll always be here for you. I promise.'

I nodded my response, focusing on calming myself down.

'Always?' I managed to choke out.

'Always.'

Smiling, I snuggled into his chest and tilted my head back to kiss his cheek sweetly. 'I'm glad.'

End Flashback

The agony seems damned if it's going to let go of me now, so the memories continue coming.

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My head nuzzled his neck as a soft, contented sigh escaped my lips. 'Hiei-kun...'

'Hn?'

'...Nothing...'

He pulled away to gaze into my ruby orbs, his own reflecting curiosity and a small amount of concern. 'Tell me, Yukina-chan. Please?'

Stubbornly, I shook my head. 'No, it's too embarrassing.'

He sighed and pulled me to his chest again, but not in time for me to miss the small, rare smile that graced his lips. 'Alright, fine, I won't force it from you.'

'Thank you.'

His only response was another 'Hn.' I giggled softly and snuggled against him again, wrapping my arms around his waist.

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I stood there, staring at him. I couldn't believe the sight before me. He couldn't--

I fell to my knees, tears streaming down my cheeks. His blood stained my pale blue kimono and skin.

"Hiei... Hiei!!!!" Desperately, I crawled over to him. "Hiei-kun, please... Kamis, no! You can't...!!"

I reached out to him, placed a trembling hand on his cheek.

It was cold. He was dead. He'd... died... to save me.

"NO!! Hiei-kun, please!!! Don't leave me!! You can't--!!"

Hands grabbed me, pulled me back, but I fought desperately against them. He needed my help; I could heal him!!

"Hiei-kun!!!!"

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Now the memories come so fast, it was enough to keep the wound fresh and torturous, but not enough for me to comprehend them. Silent sobs rack my body as I lay on the muddy ground, shaking violently.

Several hours later - maybe it was only minutes; I couldn't tell - I stand, still shaking violently, but otherwise fine. Now that the pain was over, however, the overwhelming depression takes its place. The hole in my chest continues to throb and burn, but it's empty now. Sobs again rack my body, but tears come with them. They rolled down my cheeks, crystallizing almost as soon as they fall from my face. Their sound is lost in the storm, and I notice not how many I shed. All I can see is what stood across from me in the clearing.

A polished black headstone made of marble.

It marks a resting place.

The final resting place of "him," the man who's stolen my heart. On shaky legs I walk over to it. I somehow managed to reach it, because when I fall to my knees again, I'm in front of it.

A single, choked word escapes my lips.

"H-Hiei-kun..."

I throw myself over the marble, sobbing and shaking. I'm near hysterics, which is clear, even to me. I don't know anything but the cold stone on my cheek. Even the pelting rain goes unnoticed.

"You promised... You said you wouldn't leave me... So why?! Why are you here?!?" A loud clap of thunder drowns out my cries, but I know I said them aloud, for my throat burned from the strain. I continue to rant and cry, cursing him to Hell and back for leaving me.

After a long time, I start calming down, but I don't know how long I've been here. Quiet sobs, softer now, shake my small form as I hold on to the headstone for dear life.

Suddenly, I feel something on my shoulder. It seems to be a hand, but I can't be certain. Turning slightly, I look up to see who it is.

And meet the same crimson pools that have haunted my dreams and danced at the edges of the wound in my chest for a year.

"Hiei?!" I cry, my eyes widening in disbelief. There's no way he could be here! Not when I'm draped over the solid evidence of his death.

A familiar but rare warmth lights up his ruby orbs, making them shimmer in the dim light. "Hello, Yukina-chan," he murmurs, crouching next to me.

"Kami, Hiei-kun... It's really you! But... Why are you here?"

He places a hand on my cheek, cupping my face up to better look at him.

"I can't stay, imouto-chan..." he replies.

Then I notice how he seems somewhat transparent.

He isn't real. This is merely his ghost. Sorrow fills my eyes, and my vision becomes blurred by the tears that form. I know that, were I not so exhausted, the raw hole in my chest would send me face-down in the mud with agony again.

"Why are you here?" I repeat, my voice cracking.

"To tell you something..."

"What is it, Hiei-kun?"

He hesitates, then sighs softly. Pulling my face closer, he stops just before our lips meet.

"I love you, Yukina-chan," he whispered, his breath fanning out over my lips. Briefly, I wonder how that's possible - he's a ghost - but the thought is quickly pushed from my mind. It doesn't matter right now.

I look back at him, confusion in my eyes. "I know that, Hiei-kun. I mean, I'm your--" he cuts me off before I can finish the statement.

"No, not as my imouto-chan. As something more..."

I see that a blush has stained his cheeks. I'm still very confused, if not moreso.

"Why, Hiei-kun?" I ask, voicing the main source of my confusion.

"I'm not sure," he replies. "You're sweet, caring... You accepted me for who I was, and you knew nothing of the blood we shared. On top of that, you're very beautiful, Yukina-chan..."

Now it's my turn to blush. I smile a bit, actual warmth coming into the notion. One thing bothers me, though.

"Hiei-kun, please don't speak in past tense..." my voice is soft, pleading. He understands instantly and nods

"Alright. As long as you're happy."

The smile widens on my lips, before dropping. "I can't be happy, Hiei-kun..."

He looks at me, confusion rendering clearly within the brilliant gems he claimed to be his eyes.

"Why?" he demands urgently.

"Because you're not with me. You're gone, and I can't have you..." I reply, averting my eyes to the side. Depression threatens to claim me once more. Only this man's ghostly presence keeps me from that black abyss.

Out of the corner of my eye, I see him blink his widened eyes. Then he smiles and makes me look at him again.

"But I'll be with you again. I talked to KoEnma, and it took all this time--a year--but I convinced him to let me come back. To be with you," he says, sincerity dripping from his every word. "That is, assuming you want to be with me as well...?" he adds hastily, doubt, worry and anxiousness poorly concealed within his eyes. I blink, realizing that I hadn't yet told him that I return his feelings.

"Oh, I do, Hiei-kun!! I love you..." Blushing a bit deeper than I had been previously, I look away again and murmur, "I always have..."

The smile widens on Hiei's lips and he once again turns my face back to look at him. He hesitates for no more than a few moments, before dipping his head and capturing my lips with his own. Again, I briefly wonder how that's possible, and again the thought is quickly pushed from my mind. I lean up and kiss him back, wrapping my arms around his neck. Slowly, his arms snake their way around my waist, pulling me closer and thereby deepening the kiss.

I know not how long we stay like that before we break apart to breathe. A smile finds its way to his lips and mine as we maintain eye contact.

"I love you, onii-san..." The confession is murmured, but obviously sincere. He opens his mouth to say the words I know will make me happy again, put me on Cloud 9 for the rest of my life.

And then I wake up.

Confused, I look around, sitting up and rubbing the sleep from my eyes.

"Hiei-kun?" Silence meets my call. Standing, I quickly don a house yukata over my nude form and slide the shoji door to my room open.

"Hiei-kun?" I call again, looking around. I notice it's early morning, and wonder where he could have gone.

For several minutes, I wander the temple, occasionally calling the small demon's name. Rounding a corner, I literally run into Botan.

"Oh, Botan-san, I'm so glad I found you. Have you seen Hiei-kun anywhere? He wasn't here when I woke up, and I'm getting worried..." I began to look around as I speak the last sentence, as if I could somehow find him now, when I couldn't before.

"Yukina-chan... Don't you remember?" Botan's voice is soft, laced with sadness. I look back at her, confusion expressed clearly within my crimson pools.

"Remember what, Botan-san?" I ask, cocking my head to the side.

"Hiei-san is..." she trails off nervously. After several long moments, she sighs opens her mouth again.

"Yukina-chan, Hiei-san is dead. He died yesterday... To save your life."

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Done. Please review/comment. Thank you.