What the Flames Revealed
NOTE: This is for Yearly Esca's Pic'n'Fic, with the prompt "Memories" for my partner Nehasy. We both are extremely fond of Dilandau so, of course, this story had to feature him in some way.
My earlier ideas for this were too close to my story "Fireproof" and "Moving up to Higher Ground" (inspired by Nehasy's art) but then I found myself seeking inspiration from music, as usual. So, the result has various influences, from "Jenny of Oldstones" and Game of Thrones in general, and even "Poor, Unfortunate, Souls" from The Little Mermaid, just because. There's a bit of oracle of Delphi vibes here as well because I wanted to add to the mythos of Escaflowne and Gaea. Varie makes a special appearance here as well since I always got the sense that she is everyone's spirit guide somehow.
But this is a Dilandau story so there is fire. There must always be fire.
Enjoy!
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"You've come a long way," the guardian of the temple told her, "What is it that you seek?"
"Freedom," replied Celena Schezar, "and peace."
The guardian gave her a knowing look before leading her inside the temple. She was a tall, Draconian woman with long, black hair and the majestic white wings of those from her race. She had an otherworldly grace about her, which made some sense considering her position.
Celena sensed something familiar about her but she could not be sure why. She was certain they had never met before, even when she was Dilandau. But the guardian seemed to know more than she let on about the young woman's predicament and Celena felt that she could trust her. After all, she had come all this way for answers.
Many spoke of a temple, at the edge of the world, beyond all known territories of Gaea, and further than the wreckage of what was once the Zaibach Empire. No particular deity was worshipped here but there was a great and benevolent power that drew the suffering towards this sanctuary. Only the bravest and most desperate of souls would seek this ancient, sacred site, as the price for certain truths could at times be too steep. One could never be certain of what would be demanded in exchange for one's wish, but all wishes had been granted, in one way or another. The temple had no name and only appeared to those who truly needed it.
No one who returned from that pilgrimage could ever accurately describe the place, accounts varied from saying it was a monumental structure with colossal statues flanking the ornately-carved doorway while others said it was a wooden hut-like structure with a small chimney and a fireplace where a cauldron brewed something warm and inviting. What Celena eventually found was something completely different and eerily familiar – a small, stone building reminiscent of classic Asturian architecture but with the statue of a lion guarding its entrance. The guardian had appeared on the doorstep to welcome her and Celena had been sure she had found the right place.
Her decision to seek out this mythical place had caused a stir back home, but she had been determined to see this through. After all, they had exhausted all options. They had tried science and modern medicine and psychology and everything short of another Fate Alteration experiment. On the last point she had been adamant. She would not go through that again, not for anything.
But nothing had worked. She remained body wracked by the struggle of two souls, the burden of two identities trying to survive. To his credit, Dilandau did not impose his presence on her intentionally. She sensed that the war had broken him irrevocably and he could no longer fight as fiercely as he once had. This did not change the fact that he continued to exist, within her consciousness, more than a dream and more than a mere collection of memories.
And she longed to be free of him.
For both their sakes.
So, she had made the journey here, despite all protests and arguments. And for the first time in years, she felt that this might be the moment she would finally get her wish.
She followed the guardian into a small room surrounded by stone walls and not much else. Celena waited patiently for instructions from the guardian who moved to the center of the room and raised her hands, as if to summon some ancient deity.
The lady motioned for Celena to step forward and the latter did so hesitantly, suddenly unsure of what to expect. The guardian gave her a reassuring smile before raising a hand ceremonially and revealing a pillar of fire, burning bright and hot in the center of the room.
But Celena did not flinch at the sight of it, only stared at it in fascination. She even took comfort in its presence. After all, this was her element. Their element.
The guardian did not need to tell her what to do next.
The flames burned even fiercer as Celena stepped towards them, as if welcoming her home. She sighed and closed her eyes as she felt herself engulfed by them, feeling no pain, suffering no injury. And she waited.
She had long known that she was impervious to the destructive power of fire, just as Dilandau had been. But she had kept this secret, desiring to live as normal a life as possible. There was reason enough for others to fear her, if they knew of her past, or rather, Dilandau's history.
She kept this a secret even from Allen, much as she loved him, because she knew he would never understand. Not all the effects of the Fate Alteration were detrimental. At least, there were some that you could easily live with and this was one of those.
When Celena opened her eyes, various scenes of life in Zaibach flashed before her. Some were innocuous events such as sparring sessions with the other Dragonslayers, boring planning sessions with the Strategos, and even strolls in the gardens with Jajuka. There were slightly unnerving moments like rare audiences with the Emperor, watching in awe as his image was projected over a screen. There were unpleasant exchanges with General Adelphos. And then, there were the painful memories, the war, the carnage, and the slaughter of all the Dragonslayers.
Celena knew all of these well. She had been there. And yet, she hadn't been. Not really. She had been a witness but not a participant, at least not a willing one.
And if she was honest with herself, she did not want any part of that. She felt like an interloper in someone else's story. She knew that she would never retrieve those ten long years of her life. She had long come to accept that fact. But she did not want to remember a life that had not really been hers.
"These are not my memories," she said softly, "They're yours."
And as if summoned, he appeared, Dilandau Albatou, not quite a corporeal being but a vision, a shadow. He might have been called a ghost but he wasn't even dead.
They stood in front of each other, like two figures gazing at their reflections in a mirror.
"So, what happens now?" Celena asked him.
Dilandau shrugged.
"Damned if I know," he replied, "This was your idea."
Celena sighed but was slightly comforted by having the chance to converse with him face to face. They were always together, of course, two consciousnesses hovering over the other but this was hardly conducive to proper communication. They knew too much about the other, possibly more than they cared to know. But they had not been given a choice.
Scenes of Zaibach continued to be displayed in the flames around them and they stopped to watch some of these for a few moments. Dilandau looked particularly moved by each event. There was a longing in his eyes for the life that had been snatched from him so abruptly. But he also knew that it had never been his life to live.
As they contemplated on these snippets of their past, they both came to a realization.
"You don't want these memories. But they are all I have left," Dilandau said gravely, "They're mine and mine alone, and they are not a burden you must bear."
The power of the temple would only grant the wish of one and they both knew it was Celena who deserved such recompense for all her hardships.
Dilandau would take whatever he could get, which was not bad considering the circumstances. They finally had a way to ahead, a path cleared for Celena's future.
Dilandau would have to content himself with whatever existence he would now have to endure. At the very least, he would not have to compete with anyone for the right to be.
"I free you of them," Dilandau declared simply, "And I free us both."
Suddenly, Celena felt that something was being ripped from inside her and being flung into the fire. She nearly lost her balance as she felt a weight being lifted from her person. For a moment, she struggled to catch her breath but when she recovered herself, she saw that she was face to face with only Dilandau.
All the memories had dissolved into the flames and try as she might, she could not recall any of them. She had no recollection of her time in Zaibach, and only barely recognized the person in front of her. But she could not be sure of what exactly their connection was, only that they had known each other for a long time.
Those fateful ten years had been wiped clean in her mind, as if she had simply been asleep for the longest time. Those ghosts would no longer haunt her. There was a bit of a void, but mostly, she felt immensely relieved and refreshed.
She stared at Dilandau who simply nodded at her before disappearing into the flames. Celena blinked and the fire disappeared and she was simply standing in an empty room, with the temple guardian waiting patiently for her.
"Is that it then?" Celena asked, in slight confusion.
The guardian nodded. "How do you feel?" she asked.
Celena pondered on this for a few moments, taking stock of herself and checking what had changed. She could not find the words to describe it but all she knew was that, for the first time in years, she felt truly happy and free.
She smiled at the guardian and all was understood.
"Your wish has been granted," the guardian declared, but this was mostly a formality. All parties were already well aware of what had taken place.
"But wait," Celena said, "Was there not a price I needed to pay?"
"You paid that price for ten long years," the guardian replied, "Nothing more has been demanded of you. Someone else needed to be sacrificed. There was no other way."
Celena frowned at this but also knew that she had no control over the circumstances. Not then, and not now. It saddened her, nevertheless, that she would not see him again. They had been reluctant companions all these years. It seemed strange to be completely independent, even if that was what she had always longed for. She had not expected to feel conflicted. But what was done was done.
"What will become of him?" she asked the guardian.
"He is not dead, in case you were wondering," the lady explained, "But he will remain here for the time being, under our protection. Fate still has plans for him."
Celena sighed with relief. "That's good to know," she said earnestly, "He's been lost for so long, I hope that he can find his own way in the world."
"You need not worry about him now," the guardian reassured her, "He had wished for freedom too, and now that has been granted in its own way. These are exceptional circumstances. We shall see what he chooses to do with a second chance."
"And now?" Celena asked hesitantly.
"Now, your life is your own," the guardian told her gently, "As it always should have been."
"Thank you," Celena whispered.
The lady gestured towards the door and Celena took a few steps forward. Once she had cleared the threshold of the temple and stepped into the sunlight, she took a deep breath, savoring the sensation of long-awaited freedom and peace.
She didn't need to look behind her to know that the temple had completely disappeared, off to aid some other lost soul in need. She was glad that she had been strong enough to take this journey.
Celena Schezar smiled as she walked confidently towards her future.