"I ran. Faster and more blindly than I ever had. I escaped. Escaped quickly from the one whom hurt me. I cried.. I cried so softly no one heard me.. I waited.. I waited and still he never came"

I let out a long sigh, my fist resting against my chin as I stared out over the lake. I let out another sigh, my throat aching weakly. I pressed my hand to the base of my neck, my eyes shutting smoothly.

I pushed myself to hard. Yelled to loudly. Now my throat would be sore for the next few hours.

It didn't matter though, it was evident as I sat here alone.

All the yelling, screaming and cursing meant nothing. None of it made a difference. None of it changed things.

Dont know if I can yell any louder how many times.
have I kicked you outta here?
Or said something insulting?

I glanced back over my shoulder, seeing nothing but the dark sky and the wet grass.

He wasn't even chasing after me.. I should expect it though. Why would he chase me?

I was just a demon slayer he traveled with. A fighting comrade equal to Inuyasha or Kagome. I meant nothing to him. I wasn't even worth the effort to chase after. How pathetic yet true.

He'd be here if he wanted to be. He'd comfort me if he truly cared. And he wasn't.. That simple fact screamed the truth violently into my mind.

I can be so mean when I wanna be.
I am capable of really anything,

If I wasn't so weak I'd attack him, just as my father would have wanted. If I wasn't so weak I would have never let him get so close. I'd keep him far away, far from my fragile heart.

I growled softly, my fists clenching loosely at my sides.

I wanted to hit him. Really I wanna hit anyone at this point.

I just want to release all of these emotions and let them evaporate from inside me. I want to be free of my self pity and doubt. I want to be strong and cold. Confident and independent. I wanted so much to be free, just free of loving that man.

His smooth voice echoed in my ears. 'Sango'.

The way he said my name made my heart flutter wildly.

I was truly just a stupid girl. What should it matter if he says my name differently, even so minutely than he does the others? It's not as if that difference meant anything. I still was not worthly enough to love. Not pretty enough to court. I was just Sango.. Plain, old, unfeminine Sango. How sad that a demon slayer should be so pathetic.

I can cut you into pieces.
But my heart is....broken.

I stole a fleeting glance over my shoulder once more, still nothing had changed.

What should I do now?

I can't very well go back there. Should I wait here? Wait for Kagome or Inuyasha to seek me out? No. Kagome would have questions, and Inuyasha.. Well his silence was just confrimation that he knew everything. Far more than I would have ever liked.

Perhaps I should wait. Wait for Miroku to take the girl as his wife, maybe then my heart can be free of him.

I shook my head lightly, my hair brushing across my eyes.

No.. That'd make no difference. I'd still love him. As sickening as it is, I'd still love a monk who hurt me so terribly.

Please don't leave me.
I always say how I don't need you,
But it's always gonna come right back to this.
Please, don't leave me..

Father would be so disappointed in my weakness.

I felt Kirara's nose brush my hand, her wide eyes turned up to me innocently. But not innocently enough. She knew everything and just wanted to show me understanding in her own feline way. Kirara.. I rubbed my hand over the top of her head, her fur tickling my fingers.

This wasn't me. This jealous, vindictive, angry woman scorned. The real me was reflected in Kirara's eyes. Weak, vulnerable, loving, innocent, timid.. That was the real me, the me I would never let that man see again.

How did I become so obnoxious?
What is it with you that makes me act like this?
I've never been this nasty,

The main factor in the change in personality attributes to one, infuriating monk. A monk with a boyish face and captivating smile; soft hair, rough hands, broad chest, beautiful lips...

I shook my head roughly, my eyes opening toward the lake surface.

Dammit! I had to stop doing that! I couldn't keep thinking of that man! No.. I needed a cure to wipe away the plague he had inflicted upon my mind and heart. I needed something, anything.. Anything to make my heart stop fluttering and make my eyes stop wandering over his body.

I saw Kirara's eyes flick up to the sky, her skin pricking tensely. I followed her gaze toward the dark blanket of sky, my eyes dancing over the lake god.

I jumped to my feet, my hand clenching tightly to the hiraikutsu. Adrenaline pulsed through me once more, awakening my sleeping muscles and finally taking my mind off of that damn monk.

Can't you tell that this is all just a contest?
The one that wins will be the one that hits the hardest

"You will be mine! No matter what I will make you my wife"! He screamed at the wriggling Shima under his arm.

"No!" She squealed loudly, her head twisting to face him. "I told you! I have already promised myself to Miroku-sama"!

There it goes.. Concentration is officially blown.. Dammit.

I felt myself lowering the hiraikutsu, brushing it down my shoulder until it touched the glass.

The vindictive Sango should probably leave Shima to die. Or at least get rescued by her precious Miroku-sama. Either one would be appropriate. She could have a happy ending with Miroku or die a violent death at the bottom of the lake.. Part of me prefered the latter.

Kirara let out a meow, obviously sensing that I was contemplating letting the girl die.

"I'll forgive you! I will forgive you for what happened in the past"! The lake god yelled as Shima screeched loudly.

Forgivness.. How funny that word is. It is truly difficult to forgive one so stupid..

I shook my head again, clearing my thoughts of anything that related to Miroku.

I was not the vindictive Sango, I -unfortunately- was the forgiving one. And I would forgive Shima for loving Miroku, even if it took him from me.

"Kirara"! I yelled as she transformed, her eyes on the center of the pond where the lake god disappeared. I jumped swiftly onto her back, swinging the hiraikutsu over my head as we flew into the air.

We dove beneath the black water, the hiraikutsu thundering ahead of us at the lake god's head. As it collided into it's skull, I reached out as far as I could for Shima's hand. Closing one hand around her wrist, I pulled down on Kiara's neck, directing her upwards as I pulled Shima behind me. Dammit.. I should be a saint for saving this hopeless girl!

We launched through the surface of the water, the cool wind whipping across my face as I pulled Shima onto Kiara's hind.

"You're"? She gaped, staring at me awestruck. "You're Miroku's companion."

I should just drop her here for bringing him up again. But I decided against it, pulling her into a sitting position behind me as I turned my head away.

For a second I was alright, concentrating on getting her to safety, but my heart dropped as the devil's voice echoed through the air.

"Sango"! He called loudly, trying to draw my attention to him.

"Miroku sama"! Shima yelled in my ear, shattering my concentration.

I stole a quick glance backward, watching him running in front of Kagome and Inuyasha far below.

Well.. It's not as if he's chasing after me.. He was chasing her. His naive little Shima.

I turned away, trying to force down the tears that were threatening to pour over my lashes.

I heard a collective gasp from shore and couldn't help but look.

The lake god hissed loudly, it's long, slick tongue shooting out toward us as Shima screamed. Shima pressed into my back, squealing and screeching loudly.

I gasped as it's tongue coiled around my ankle tugging me roughly down. "Kirara! Get her to some place safe"! I screamed as I tumbled off of Kiara's back toward the dark water far below.

"So reckless"! Miroku screamed as he and Inuyasha charged toward the lake's edge.

"Hiraikutstu"! I screamed thrusting the hiraikutsu over my head into the lake god's jaws. I caught Miroku's gaze and my heart fluttered just as it had done a thousand times. So stupid that he affects me like this.

But baby I don't mean it I mean it, I promise

"Stupid fool"! He laughed knocking it back effortlessly as he plunged into the water.

I felt my lungs tighten as we dove deeply into the water. My body froze as his tongue coiled further up my thigh. My strength was quickly escaping me, just as quickly as the air was traveling out of my lungs. I struggled again, kicking and scratching at his tongue with the last vestiges of strength I had in me. He laughed darkly, pulling me toward him as we nearly reached the bottom.

"Wench, it is pointless. I will take you to the bottom and make you my concubine"! He said loudly, his voice vibrating the water around us.

I leaned away from him, struggling once more, with more vigor.

This sick, little, disgusting youkai saying such things! Why he was worse than- I froze as several ofuda's flashed onto the lake god's head, shocking and burning him violently.

My eyes widened as I saw Miroku flying at the demon's thrashing head.

He looked so beautiful in his ferocity, so exquisite in his rage. It was always entrancing to watch him fight.

I always say how I don't need you,
But it's always gonna come right back to this.
Please, don't leave me.

The lake god writhered and screamed, flying toward the surface wildly.

I gasped as we broke the surface, the water flying high into the air as the lake god screamed.

Miroku rocketed through the air, thudding down on the demon's head and piercing the ofudas with his staff.

I dropped from the demon's grasp, landing heavily on the hard ground. I cringed slightly, placing my hand against my head as I glanced up at the fuming Miroku. Once again, he was so handsome, I had to stop myself from gaping at him.

I forgot to say out loud how beautiful you really are to me.
I can't be without, you're my perfect little punching bag.
And I need you, I'm sorry.

I watched Miroku grunt and shutter angrily, taking the lake god into his hands as he glared down at him.

"Listen up cat fish!" He screamed in his face, Miroku's boyish face twisted with unbelievable rage.

Was this really the monk who didn't even come after me to appologize? The level headed monk always playing peace maker between Kagome and Inuyasha? No. It couldn't be.. Could it?

"Don't you dare try to mess with my woman again! You got that straight"?! Miroku roared, pounding his fist into the lake god's head.

"You mean she's one of your women too? I am so very sorry monk". The lake god whimpered weakly as Miroku's eyes narrowed.

"Quiet you!" He snapped, striking him again before his eyes flickered up at me. "Sango are you alright"? He whispered kindly to me as I froze.

Please, please don't leave me..

My breath was caught in my throat, unable to navigate past the enormous lump that formed.

Why was I not able to answer him? He saved me.. But still. I wouldn't have to even needed saving if he wasn't such an idiot.

I turned my head away sharply, but just slow enough that I saw his expression soften and turn confused. Same old Miroku..

I climbed silently to my feet, turning carefully away from him. I smiled as I heard the lake god thud to the ground, Miroku's footsteps following soon after.

Finally..

"Hey Sango"! He called as I quickened my pace.

I hurried away from him, bowing my head slightly as I tried to suppress a smile. Finally he was acting how I wanted him to. Chasing after me just as I had chased after him for so long. I almost burst out laughing when he called out to me weakly.

I always say how I don't need you,
But it's always gonna come right back to this.

"Sango... Hello"!

I sped even faster, pacing the perimeter of the empty lake as he chased after me just as quickly.

"I know you can hear me... Sango". He said playfully as I swung my arms roughly at my sides.

"Come on Sango". I heard him say, and I could almost feel the smile creeping up on his face.

But I wasn't about to budge, oh no, I was going to draw this out as long as I could. I was going to make this good.

Truthfully I'd forgiven him the moment he saved me. The moment when no one else in the world mattered to him but me. But I wasn't about to let him know that. I kept him thinking I was mad well into the next morning until he finally came out and apologized.

Please don't leave me.
Please don't leave me.

Honestly I would prefer if we fought like this for the rest of our lives, well maybe not every day. But even if a hundred women came out saying they were engaged to Miroku it wouldn't bother me. So long as at the end of the day it was me he was chasing after. And I was the last one to look into those, perfectly decieving eyes.

THE END