The clouds have completely engulfed the shy as rain starts to hit my window. It's going to storm again. I have been asked many times what i am afraid of and i simply reply "nothing". But I, Draco Lucius Malfoy, am completely and utterly petrified of thunder storms. No, not because of the noise, or the lightning, but the memories. Oh, the memories that plague my mind during them! Even if i try to take my mind off of them the always creep back in - like a flood gate being opened to the murky waters of my deepest secrets.
I bet Granger isn't afraid of storms, she's probably sleeping in her room all soundly without a care in the world" I sneer bitterly. I envy her so. I envy her normal life, her normal family, and her perfect little friends. But me? What did I have? I had Lucius, I dare never call him father. He may be my flesh and blood but he never cared for me or my mother, let alone love us. My mother... of course she was always there in the flesh but I could see it. Every day with that wretch of a man made her eyes dimmer, her heart colder. Now that i'm no longer there to protect her it's gotten even worse. I suppose it's because I am no longer there to take most of the beatings.
"Damn, there I go again thinking about it" i say to myself as another wave of thunder crashes down like a wave around me. There can only be one explanation - Granger. I leap off the bed and grab my wand in one swift motion. More thunder, more screams, and more memories plague me as i venture down the prefect hallway to Granger's room. When i reach the door I take a breath trying to relieve some of the distress I already feel in my throat. I slowly turn the handle and crack the door a bit. All I hear is whimpering, and a slight sniffling sound. She's in her bed covered halfway in a huge comforter shaking madly. Her face tear stricken, and her normally rosy cheeks are splashed with bits of eyeliner and smeared with mascara. "She hasn't noticed me yet" i sigh in relief but of course she hears something, looks towards the door, and discovers who? Me, her worst enemy.
"Erm... Malfoy, what do you-" she paused to sniffle "want.." she asked with such curiosity, but also an underlying fear of the answer
"I heard you scream... a lot. Uh, I just came to see if you were... Okay." I say almost as sheepishly as she
"Oh" she replied with another sniff "I figured you had come to make fun of me" she continued with a blush. How she could blush with her face so flush already is beyond me but she somehow managed.
"Now why would I do that?" I reply with a smirk
She bowed her head for a moment. "Oh I don't know, maybe because you always seem to find a way to make me feel like a worthless piece of shit, or..." she trailed off like she was ashamed.
"Ah, it's mostly directed towards Pothead or Weasel don't you know?" i struggle for the words to say next, because to be honest i haven't had a conversation like this with anyone in ages. "You're not that bad Granger" I finally say after a very evident gap in the conversation.
"Ha. Fucking. Ha Malfoy." she mock laughed while glaring at me "What do you really want"
"Seriously Granger I heard you scream and came to check." I replied matter-of-factly "Since you seem to be doing fine i'll be going now" I stepped out of the doorway slightly and reached for the handle
"Wait!" she half yelled as another crash of thunder roared into the room
I closed my eyes, breathed deeply as she continued "Please.." she half cried half whispered into her now balled up comforter I looked at her pleading eyes, that terrified look... oh how she looked like my mother when- Dammit not again. I run my fingers through my hair as i enter back into her room, closing the door behind me. She motioned for me to come sit adjacent to her on the bed and started biting at her quivering lip. Another chill crept through me as I felt the thunder, this time i didn't close my eyes though. I directed my attention over to Hermione who was shaking again. God she reminds me so much of my mother, why am I even doing this to myself. I reach over and grabbed her hand
"Hermione, you're going to be okay" i mumble soothingly
Our eyes met abruptly, and she tilted her head in confusion. She opened her mouth a couple times struggling for words but in the end found herself staying quiet. I withdrew my hand and mumbled an apology. My mind was swirling as if I was being sucked out into the storm. As the thunder calmed again she found her voice and began to speak.
"What" she cleared her throat "What do you mean you're sorry"
"That was probably... you know, out of line"
Another silence filled the room. As we listed to the pangs of the rain against the windows we were silent. That is until the next thunder crash. Looking exhausted Hermione again looked at me to speak
"So why did you come to see if I was okay?" as she finished she began biting her lip again.
"Well, although you may not believe it I don't hate you, and well i was kind of... curious" as the sentence went on i felt my words get twisted in my mouth. They felt like cotton, thick and uncomfortable.
"Curious?" she questioned, pulling me out of my state of unfathomable self loathing
"I didn't think someone like you would be afraid of storms" i reply "And what would that be exactly?" anger flicked off every word "A mudbl-"
I cut her off with shame in my voice "No, someone who-" and just before i finished i leapt off the bed and headed for the door. "I should be going" I half mumble as I close the door behind me.
I could hear her sigh, and I almost turned around. "
What was I thinking?" i wail as I slam my body into the fabric on my bed "How could I almost tell a complete stranger, the person i'm suppose to hate the most my-" I pause in my rant when I see the clock
"One thirty in the morning, for fucks sake" i growl into the pillow.
Sleep is what I need. It'll all be better in the morning. The only problem with that theory is that my mind is full of memories after the storm. Dreams of my past I want to keep hidden from the rest of myself. Nonetheless my eyes close and I flutter into quiescent sleep.