He's exactly where she knows he will be, crouched in front of the polished grave stone. It's been raining for at least ten minutes, about as long as he's been here if Ino was correct, but Kira knows he doesn't even notice it. Shikamaru is too lost in his purpose to notice something as trivial as the rain soaking through his clothes. She draws closer, holding the umbrella over both their heads as he fumbles with the wet cigarette in his hands.
"Here" She hands him the dry one from her pocket. She'd brought it from her father's pack for just this purpose.
Kira is sure she sees relief for a fleeting second as he takes it from her. Using Asuma's lighter, he lights it and sets it on the stone alter someone, she figures it was Ino or Chouji, has set in front of the grave. The tension leaves him through a sigh as he stands up, taking the umbrella from her hands. Kira doesn't protest as he pulls it from her fingers, he's taller than she is and her holding when he's standing will only result in both of them being soaked.
"Thank you, Kira" Shikamaru's voice is a breath as he says it.
"Don't mention it" She answers as they both watch the burning red of the cigarette against cold, gray stone. She's thankful she thought to wrap the specially made seal around it before she left her home. It's her chakra coursing through the paper that keeps it lit and safe from the rain. Her sister had given her a hard look when she saw it, but Kira ignored her. She does it because she knows he'll break if it goes out. Shikamaru isn't a superstitious person, but the cigarette is sacred. Every moment it's lit is a sign of appeasement.
In the back of her mind, Kira wonders if he knows he's shaking. She figures he does, because he's been here often enough that he knows it's not the weather when it happens. Shikamaru gets like this every time he comes, crouching down in front of the grave stone after every single mission he's sent on. Sometimes he invites her along, but most of the time she comes by herself. Whatever happens to her because of it. She doesn't want him to be alone.
"You didn't have to come, Kira" She knew the statement was coming, has prepared for hearing it in the monotone he uses here.
"I wanted to" Kira answers with her usual tone, turning her eyes from the now dwindling cigarette.
"You always say that" She sees the slight upturn of his mouth. It isn't quite a smile, but its something.
"And you always tell me I don't have to" It's another statement that's passed between them so many times before that it's become natural.
Shikamaru turns his back to the grave as the cigarette's light fades. He's never been able to watch this part, averting his eyes as if watching it go out is like watching his mentor die all over again. She's watched him do it over and over again, but this time is different. This time he reaches his hand back, finding hers in the dark and squeezing her fingers. She squeezes back, startled at the sudden gesture.
"Shika-" Before she can speak he's angled himself toward her, pulling her into his chest and wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Their fingers are still tangled together and the handle of the umbrella is pressed against her shoulder blade. There's rain too, cold and sharp against her arm but she doesn't protest. Kira just relaxes and rests her free hand on his shoulder, letting him lay his head against hers.
"I'm so glad you follow me out here every time, Kira." His voice whispers against her hair. "I don't know what would happen if you weren't here each time"
The rain lessens and then stops completely, letting bright sunlight peek at them from behind the clouds. Neither of them moves as Kira takes in what he's just said. His name is all she can manage as he presses his face into the crook of her neck. Suddenly he's pulling back, moving his hand from hers to her cheek. Shikamaru presses his lips against hers. She leans into the kiss, tasting the rain on his skin.
Somewhere along the line they've dropped the umbrella. It spatters mud across their ankles and leaves traces along the base of the grave. Kira feels guilty for doing this here, for letting him kiss her in front of Asuma's grave. But the kiss has clouded her head with warmth and she can't string together the actions to make him stop.
It's Shikamaru that pulls away first, forehead resting against hers. Kira is speechless, watching his eyes as he stares into her brown ones. "Kira..." He mumbles her name. For the first time since Asuma's death there are tears in his eyes.
"I know." She brushes her fingers affectionately across his cheek.
They don't speak for a minute as both turn to watch the final breath of the cigarette. A tear has escaped down his cheek, falling across her fingers.
"I'm sorry" He breaths. Kira knows it's meant for the man whose grave they're standing at. It's also the first time he's really spoken directly to his sensei, though his team and Kira have been urging him to do it for weeks.
"Shikamaru" Kira draws her attention back to him. "You'll catch a cold if you stand here in wet clothes"
He just blinks at her as if he's just now noticed it.
"Okay?" She lets the smile spread warmly across her face, her fingers pressing gently into his.
"Okay"
_
A/N: if you get the book reference at the ending then we can be best friends forever :)