Everytime she got into bed she thought about him. The lopsided smile he would give her when she looked at him when he wore jeans. She still couldn't take his blanket off of the side opposite hers even though it had seen better days and the lettering on it was getting really faded. He had loved that. Just about as much as the threadbare brown small bear toy that was under his pillow. Only she knew why he had kept it for so long. His one thing from his mother who had been taken from him far too young. Her Tony, with the side only she had seen. The softer let me make you some hot chocolate on a cold evening one. She lifted up an old robe off the foot of the bed and pulled it on over her cornflower blue nightgown as she pulled the blankets down to get into bed. Their daughter was staying with a friend of hers for the weekend. Tara had a few friends but they didn't often have sleepovers these days. It was mostly brownies with chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream in Kate's kitchen after school now.
Kate found what she liked to hug before she fell asleep in the usual drawer. One of his old shirts that he had worn to work . She loved the feel of the gray material. It was soft to the touch . She held it in her arms and turned the light off as her body relaxed into sleep. Sometimes it felt like he was there even though she knew where he really was.
They should have been here together now. But it wasn't to be. Sometimes she thought about NCIS and the old days. The hole in his baseball cap always made her laugh. How he had loved that at one time. She smiled as she remembered the moment in dreams.