It was a cold witer night as a slightly obese woman, also known as My Mom, toddled into a large mansion, otherwise known as the phontomhive maonor. Sweat trickled down her reflective brow, despite the winter cold. She was in a hurry. She was delivering a message to the head of the phantomhive toy company from one of their regular customers. She had rushed all the way from eugene, oregon to deliver this important parcel. This was her job, her way of life. but the true reason she was coming to this place was to meet her lover, Sebastian. His hair reminded her of a really cool crow, soft to the touch but also dangerous in some ways.s. She thought of him very much and she really loved him a lot with his demon parts. They were very magical.
Sebastian POV
My bocchan is so kawaii. He makes me shiver with delight as soon as I see his super Kawauu uber cutee face. He likes to dress yp like a girl someties, but he never likes to admit itl. He's so aorable. I set a table gracefully, ripping the previous tablecloth off like an angry saber toothed tiger would rip off a hunk of meet in a large buffalo. I am much like a saber toothed tiger, always prepared and aware of my surrounding.s.
Ciel POV
God-fuckingdamuyt I'm loyk so pisd of at Sebastion rite now he's off hanging out with this droopy-eyed chick named "my mom" or something like i don;'t ebven now. I h8 her so much you don'y even know. I am supposed to be the head of the Phantomhive company dammit!11one!1eleven11!
There's no way I'mma lose to dis bitch. No fuken wai.
My mom POV
Ciel Phantomhive or whatever is like the bratty brat ever. He's like, so ungrateful towards that like super hunky saber-toothed man. I swear, I saw him in a leopard print loincloth the other day. So hot. I was like, "You're like hte best bf ever." and and he was embarrased nad didn't knw what to say because he was all adorabley blushing. But he is really manly, he just isn't confident in himslef. Hes really sweet and he always will b wit me.
I founf him in a closet with his bocchaan or whatever he calls that ungrateful booty brat of his and he was all over that bony nugget child. He explayned that hewas punishing him or something and I know that he llves me and always will.
Alois POV
I'm so god damn hungry when are my things going to feed me. Even though I pretend I'm not hungry, I still yell at them if they don't feed me. i don't get why evryone looks at me funny. Well, not hag-ah because she can't. She's kinda blind in one eye or something like that. I don't really care. I just like to do my thing with claude and you know just hang out, smoke a joint or something that teenaged boys do, which is obviously going to include extremely descriptive and copious amounts of homosexual engagements. Because that's what every boy does, other that prance around in girls' clothing and go shopping at the mall and sensually lick things in front of other males. That's just what we do.
Sebastian POV
Today, my boochan invited me into the closet where we proceeded to engage in extremely sexual endeavors which were so descriptive in this tale that it stood out dramatically and we had to replace it with excess amounts of Japanese words that are overused and/or misspelled. My kind of story. Anyways, My Mom walkede in on us and I told her that I was beating him up for ogling at my junk like he (and every other boy) does. She believed me, nad I;m glad she did/.
Grell POV
RYHUI4RJKEI5UFJHGRHUF
:3
Ciel POV
My manly sabor-toothed jungle hunk took me on lyk de most romantical d8 evr today. I luvv him so much but I can't let anyon kno shhhhh i'm supposd to be rlly super mean to everyone and have no damn emotions because my writers just decided I should be a stuck up bratty-ass twat because they could I don't know. Seriously why the fuck am I such an asshole, at least Alois has an understandably traumatic back story. Still doesn't explain why he licked my ear that one time though. Not like it wast hot but u kno.
I meen wat I'm not gay ew boys r gross I like Lizzyy (not rly haha jks.)
Alois POV
Today I was walking around in the jungle that definitely exists in Britain, Japan, wherever in shit's name we are, and my eyes gazed upon the most disturbing sight- I saw this marshmallow of a woman, the one rumoured to be named "My Mom", creeping along behind this saber-toothed jungle demon. With that little shit Ciel. God, I want to rip his face off or something. He seriously needs to like, take that fork out of his goddamn urchin ass. But I also am in love with him. Because that creates friction between the characters, as well as some emotional tension. I now deny this, because having feelings for another person is stupid. Time to go back and sexually harass my butler, I guess. Angrily, I mean.
Sebastian POV
Today, I took my jungle mate on a date. Haha that ryhmehdd. But as I was makin a picnic thing, I noticed the bushess rustling like an angry gorilla on crack. It kind of freaked me out a little. But anyways, I had this cute little lanket akk set out and a tiny picnic basket and it had real good foods insside. "Here you go" I told Ciel when I gave him a sandwich. He blushed and looked away, but he didn't notice the angry gorilla in the bushes. I con't stand my bootychan getting scared.
My Mom POV
During the day today, I was really suspicious of my lovely lover jungle-bungalo snookel. He's been kinda evasive lately nd i Think I did something maybe. Btu it's probably becaues of that stupid buglecopter Ciel. I will kill him. SOMEDAY.
Ciel POV
Hahaaaa dat bitch ain;t nevahs gon kill me. I kno wat she plannins, i can smell it. Smell it like the sweet cent of mah luuver and his man-purfume or whatevr dafuq its called god I don't nkow these things sorreeee.
Anyhoo she that banana-eating gorilla woman caint touch mah Sebbykins OOOHHHHH WAATTT.