Life Sucks then you die. A comprehensive Slayers Fic
Chapter 1
iLast time on Slayers, the ever-so incomparable Lina Inverse ended up going on this stupid plot filler that seemed to mainly revolve around food and money. And on today's episode, Lina and her scooby gang crew will go on yet another side quest all for the love of. you know, food and money./i
Gourry: Lina, you have no breast.
Lina: Why, you!! (Proceeds to drop kick him)
Gourry: Ow! That really hurt Lina! You'd think after all the times I've gotten my head bashed in, I would have learned and stopped bashing on your rather diminutive stature.
Lina: . Your're dumb, Gourry.
Zelgadis: Zing~!
Amelia: Er. Yeah. Truth and justice, Love & Peace!!
Vash: That's copyright infringement there, buddy.
Amelia: (Speechless)
Lina: Hey, where's are the usual wacky characters that, for no apparent reasons, has a life-threatening crisis that only I can solve?
1 iNearby bushes rustle/i
Unknown Man: (Pops out) Oh, thank the great Celphid!! You look as though you could handle yourself in a fight. even though.
Zelgadis: Uh-oh, I feel a disturbance in the force.
Unknown Man: .you have no breasts to speak of!! (Snickers)
Lina: iDamu Bras!!/i
2 iUnknown Man goes BOOM!!/i
Unknown Man: Hehe, now that we got the breast joke out of the way, which coincidentally seems be resurfacing every five minutes. (Clears his throat) I'm Mr. Zongi, Mayor of the town of Syphilis. I've come to you with a serious request. Please, hear me out, you powerful looking person!!
Lina: Yeah, yeah. What do you want?
Mr. Zongi: Well, in the fair town of Syphilis, I led a quiet life. You know, keeping a tyrannical control over the town's inhabitants, abducting young school girls for my carnal desires. When, suddenly, a revolution broke out!! I mean, where did that come from?! The revolutionary group calls themselves "Holy Knights of Fanboy Hood" and established a "Dub-Free" zone in the town. Although, I really don't get why where the whole "dub- free" zone came from when I've been rapin- I mean, educating young school girls, all this time.
Zelgadis: Probably some cheap setup for those stereotypical fanboy jokes.
Mr. Zongi: Anyway, Ms. Sorceress. I implore you to help me in my efforts to retake the town!
Amelia: Yes, Ms. Lina! We must rid the town of Syphilis of its heinous evil!! (Poses) Because, we the Scooby gang, fights for justice!!
Lina: No, way.
Mr. Zongi: (Interrupts) Did I mention the possibility of a reward?
Lina: (Eyes sparkle.)(Yeah. we know you're excited) Wow! Really! (Gives that "V" sign she likes to do so much) I humbly accept your offer! And Zongi-San? The name's. Lina Inverse!
Mr. Zongi: What?!! Really?!!! The mazoku-slaying, dragon spooker, bandit killer, Lina Inverse?!
Lina: Don't forget flat-chested and hot-tempered.
Mr. Zongi: (Blinks) Ah, yes. The string of flat-breast jokes must continue. (Coughs) That sorceress rumored to have the tiniest of bosom and a nasty temper?!
Lina: iFireball!!/i
3 iUnknown ma. I mean Mr. Zongi goes "Ahh!!!!!"/i
Zelgadis: Well, here we go, again. (Sighs)
Gourry: (Grins) I'm stupid, because I'm blond. ^____^
iThe Scooby Gang have a new destination! The town of Syphilis! Who knows the dangers they'll face there? Does Mr. Zongi have a secret agenda? Will the breast jokes ever stop? Will this ever get funnier? Will Gourry ever have another line (that actually means anything)? Find out on the next chapter of uLife Sucks then you die: A Comprehensive slayers fic/u/i
Chapter 1
iLast time on Slayers, the ever-so incomparable Lina Inverse ended up going on this stupid plot filler that seemed to mainly revolve around food and money. And on today's episode, Lina and her scooby gang crew will go on yet another side quest all for the love of. you know, food and money./i
Gourry: Lina, you have no breast.
Lina: Why, you!! (Proceeds to drop kick him)
Gourry: Ow! That really hurt Lina! You'd think after all the times I've gotten my head bashed in, I would have learned and stopped bashing on your rather diminutive stature.
Lina: . Your're dumb, Gourry.
Zelgadis: Zing~!
Amelia: Er. Yeah. Truth and justice, Love & Peace!!
Vash: That's copyright infringement there, buddy.
Amelia: (Speechless)
Lina: Hey, where's are the usual wacky characters that, for no apparent reasons, has a life-threatening crisis that only I can solve?
1 iNearby bushes rustle/i
Unknown Man: (Pops out) Oh, thank the great Celphid!! You look as though you could handle yourself in a fight. even though.
Zelgadis: Uh-oh, I feel a disturbance in the force.
Unknown Man: .you have no breasts to speak of!! (Snickers)
Lina: iDamu Bras!!/i
2 iUnknown Man goes BOOM!!/i
Unknown Man: Hehe, now that we got the breast joke out of the way, which coincidentally seems be resurfacing every five minutes. (Clears his throat) I'm Mr. Zongi, Mayor of the town of Syphilis. I've come to you with a serious request. Please, hear me out, you powerful looking person!!
Lina: Yeah, yeah. What do you want?
Mr. Zongi: Well, in the fair town of Syphilis, I led a quiet life. You know, keeping a tyrannical control over the town's inhabitants, abducting young school girls for my carnal desires. When, suddenly, a revolution broke out!! I mean, where did that come from?! The revolutionary group calls themselves "Holy Knights of Fanboy Hood" and established a "Dub-Free" zone in the town. Although, I really don't get why where the whole "dub- free" zone came from when I've been rapin- I mean, educating young school girls, all this time.
Zelgadis: Probably some cheap setup for those stereotypical fanboy jokes.
Mr. Zongi: Anyway, Ms. Sorceress. I implore you to help me in my efforts to retake the town!
Amelia: Yes, Ms. Lina! We must rid the town of Syphilis of its heinous evil!! (Poses) Because, we the Scooby gang, fights for justice!!
Lina: No, way.
Mr. Zongi: (Interrupts) Did I mention the possibility of a reward?
Lina: (Eyes sparkle.)(Yeah. we know you're excited) Wow! Really! (Gives that "V" sign she likes to do so much) I humbly accept your offer! And Zongi-San? The name's. Lina Inverse!
Mr. Zongi: What?!! Really?!!! The mazoku-slaying, dragon spooker, bandit killer, Lina Inverse?!
Lina: Don't forget flat-chested and hot-tempered.
Mr. Zongi: (Blinks) Ah, yes. The string of flat-breast jokes must continue. (Coughs) That sorceress rumored to have the tiniest of bosom and a nasty temper?!
Lina: iFireball!!/i
3 iUnknown ma. I mean Mr. Zongi goes "Ahh!!!!!"/i
Zelgadis: Well, here we go, again. (Sighs)
Gourry: (Grins) I'm stupid, because I'm blond. ^____^
iThe Scooby Gang have a new destination! The town of Syphilis! Who knows the dangers they'll face there? Does Mr. Zongi have a secret agenda? Will the breast jokes ever stop? Will this ever get funnier? Will Gourry ever have another line (that actually means anything)? Find out on the next chapter of uLife Sucks then you die: A Comprehensive slayers fic/u/i