Project Love
(A/N: Thank you to my new beta, Brittanaisendgame. I hope you guys like this new and updated chapter going to be working on more soon enough. Read and enjoy!)
I'm leaned up against a light post when I hear the school bell ring, signaling the end of the day. My girlfriend, Brianna asked me to pick her up so we could talk. When Brianna walks up she's acting all weird and she silent for the rest of the way back to her place. She looks like she wants to say something but doesn't at the same time.I don't really care either way because I have a lot on my mind too.
Brianna lives in East Harlem, or the"Spanish Harlem," I don't mind walking her around here because this area used to be my whole world. I used to live here with all my friends and we would do some pretty fun stuff. I hardly see them anymore more. I don't see Brianna everyday either though.
Our buildings were right across the parking lot from each other so it was a lot easier back then.
When we get to her building I don't really wanna go up. Mostly because her dad doesn't work on Fridays and he's gonna be there while we're doing whatever. Not that I don't like him, he's a really cool guy, I just want to be alone with Brianna.
When we get upstairs, Brianna's dad is cleaning up the house and watching T.V at the same time. I'll admit he hold it down for a single dad. I know my dad couldn't do it.
"Hi Santana, how are you? Your family okay?" he asks. He probably already knows the answer but I indulge him.
"Yeah Mr. Sánchez," I say with a small smile "We're doing alright."
"Are you hungry?" Mr. Sánchez asks me, but before I can even answer he's putting a ton of rice on a plate, along with some plantain, and a lot of chicken.
"Eat, I'm gonna go change." Brianna says smiling. She goes to this catholic school and has to wear this weird uniform she doesn't like. I sit down and Mr. Sánchez hands me the plate with a sad smile. I'm so hungry I just ignore the smile and eat. I hate it when people act like that. Like they're sorry for us.
Brianna comes out of her room a minute later in a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. She looks cute. Then again she always does to me. When I finish my food I wash my plate and Brianna tells her dad that she needs my help with her homework. She grabs my hand and leads me into her bedroom. She locks the door and I stand in the middle of the room looking around. My favourite thing about Brianna's room is all the stuffed animals on her shelves. It's...innocent and I'm glad she's like that. I mean she's only fourteen but I like it.
When I turn around, she pulls her shirt over her head and were kissing. My hands all over her body, but before anything else can happen, she goes over to the statue of St. Mary that she has next to the stuffed animals and turns it around so it's facing the wall. She does this every time we do something, so St. Mary won't see. Brianna still a virgin and she made it clear she's keeping it that way until marriage. She doesn't let me make her feel good, but she does like blowing me. I'm not going to complain about that. She might still be holding her v-card, but she seems to know what she's doing and she's really good at it.
When we're done, we go back in the living room so her dad won't suspect anything.
We're on the couch, just chilling, she's leaning on me and in this moment I'm happy. As happy as I can be. I look around and smile. I've been coming to this apartment forever and while I'm in here I can forget I'm in Harlem. Mr. Sánchez keeps it so clean. I look back at Brianna and she looks upset. "Why you acting so quiet today? What did you wanna talk about?" she just shrugs.
"Nothing, I just wanted to be with you." We kiss but it's not the same. She's not into it. I pull away and sigh.
"Just tell me Bri," she's looking everywhere and anywhere but me, playing with her hands.
"There's this guy at school and he keeps bothering me, sending notes and shit," she says quietly.
"Bothering you? I'll kick his ass." She shakes her head but I know she's lying."Are you trying to protect this guy?"
"No I'm trying to protect you." She grabs my thigh, "I don't want you to end up like your father. Shit... I'm sorry San." I get up and shake my head, "I'm gonna go." I say and walk out before she says anything else that will piss me off.
I fly down the hallway, and press the down button over and over again until it dings and the doors open. When I'm in the elevator I punch the lobby button over and over till the doors open. When I'm outside I walk around the place for a bit, trying to cool down but it isn't working out. Even though it's freezing it's all sunny and a good day for the end of January. I walk around a bit more, buy a pack of cigarettes, lean up against the wall outside and start smoking. I slowly feel the stress leaving. The stress of Brianna, my dad, everything.
…
When I get back to the EAU, around 6:00, there's not enough room inside for everyone so as usual there's more people standing outside then in. Mothers and their kids, that's all I see. No fathers anywhere. The EAU stands for the Emergency Assistance Unit, it's where people go when they have no where else to go. They're homeless. Carlos, my 8-year-old brother, is playing with my basketball in the front of the building. He's throwing it against the wall and then catching it. That's really all there is to do for someone his age. My mom is outside too, leaning on a van, smoking with some other woman. All our stuff is packed in one big black suitcase and two black garbage bags on the ground beside her. I wanna ask her if they found us a place, but I just roll my eyes at her and walk by without saying anything. I don't have anything to say to her anymore.
Carlos threw the ball against the wall and it flies over his head into the street. He's about to go and chase after it without even looking to see if cars are coming. I call to him and he stops before he reaches the street. I go and get the ball by myself, and when I turn back to him he's holding his hands up like I'm gonna pass it to him. "You're too old to be running in the street for a ball." I tell him.
"I wasn't gonna run into the street," he says with his hands still up in the air. "San, come on, give me the ball!"
"First tell me you're not gonna run into the street anymore."
"I said I wasn't right?"
I fake a pass and watch him jump to catch it. I laugh and dribble the ball, just to mess with him a little more. "Now tell me you're not gonna take my stuff without asking."
"Okay! I promise." He says with a huff.
I finally throw him the ball and then walk over to my mom. But before I can ask for what I want she interrupts me "If you are hungry you better get in there and get yourself some food." She points towards the door of the building everyone is standing outside of.
"I'm not eating anymore of that shit food" I snark back.
"What are you gonna eat then? I have no more money for McDonald's so don't bother asking."
" Forget the food, I ate at Brianna's house. Real food."
"Jose didn't send us nothing this time?"
"Nah, he was showering when I left."
My mom sucks her teeth, "Well tell him I said thanks," she says sarcastically. I hate when my mom gets that way, always thinking everyone owes her something.
"You look for a job yet?" I ask her.
She shakes her head "I went to see your father today." I just shake my head because I know she isn't ever going to change, no matter what that man does. We're never going to get an apartment for ourselves because she has to go to Rikers Island when she needs to be looking for a job. The only reason I don't have one is because I'm not the one that should be taking care of us. I have other things that I need to deal with. I don't have time to work and to take care of my mom and brother. She's the mom I'm the kid, rightfully she should be taking care of me. I'm just sixteen.
"You get the mail?" She asks even though she already knows the answer.
I grab it out of my backpack for her, "I had to pay for the box and there's a bill from the storage place that we have to pay by the first of the month." I tell her like she might cares, but she rolls her eyes, and I do the same.
"I don't know how they expect us to pay all these bills when I have no job. They're just wasting ink." She goes on and on, talking stupidness, and I stop listening.
My eyes wander across the street and I see a woman and a teenage girl coming down the block. I can tell they're coming to the EAU by the size of the duffel bags they carrying. Everything they own is in them. They look as lost as my family looked when we got here. They don't have anywhere else to go. Just like all the rest of us.
The older girl goes inside while the teenager drops her bag on the ground and lights up a cigarette. She rubs her eyes, like she's trying to hide the fact that she's crying. Her eyes catch mine. They're so blue and innocent. I find the corners of my mouth turning upwards and I give her a small nod before my mom calls me over.
"San, go to the store for me," she says when I walk over there, "Get you and your brother some chips or something, and get me a Pepsi and a pack of juicy fruit."
"Yeah. Think you can watch Carlo's this time? I mean, he's only what, ten feet away from you. He almost ran into the street for a ball." She rolls her eyes at me.
"He wasn't going to run into the street. He's not stupid."
"That's why you got him in special ed?" I ask, she ignores me. Carlos shouldn't even be in special ed. He's a smart kid and those classes have him believing he's stupid. The only reason he takes them is because my mom gets money out of it from the government.
"Get some of those donuts with the sprinkles too." She hands me a ten-dollar bill.
"Thought you had no money." I say and walk away before she can pull another lie. Before I can get too far Carlos runs up to me.
"San! Can I go to the store with you?" I nod and grab his hand and walk with him to the corner store. When we get there I buy what my mom asked for, and a little extra something for Carlos. We make our way back out and see the bus on the street. We look at each other with wide eyes, and I clutch the bag before we start running for the bus. If you're not there on time it's gonna leave without you. They don't care if you're a kid or a grown adult. They have no mercy. You're not their problem. When we get back to the unit, I see the blonde girl and the older one with their bags. Sitting outside like everyone else. I glance briefly over at her and catch her eyes. They're sad, but they still hold hope. I wish I were like that, I wish I could have hope. But sadly, I don't.
(A/N: Updated and new, review and have an amazing day)