Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, unfortunately.
AN: Yeah, so, I just just sitting here, and WHAM! BAM! BOOM! This idea hit me...for no apparent reason at all.
Full Summary: Lee decides to dye his hair! The results are hilarious. Or not so. I don't think it's funny, but lets say you; what do YOU think? Review, please!
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The GREEN Beast of Konaha
By SapphireWhiteTigress
Chapter I
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"Lee, what are you doing?" Tenten asked skeptically, watching as Rock Lee, teammate and friend, carried in his arms some unmarked square shaped boxes.
Lee gave her one of his award winning grins. "I'm going to dye my hair!"
Both Tenten and even Neji's jaws dropped. "Why?"
Lee just continued to grin as he placed the stuff that were in his arms, down on the ground to give them his full explanation. "I heard that Sakura-san likes guys with green hair! Yosh!" He gave them a thumbs up in his excitement.
"WHAT!" Neji and Tenten shouted their disbelief. Tenten was first to recover, as Neji looked like he was about to pass out. "Lee, Sakura doesn't like guys with green hair. I mean, Sasuke hair's black and she's particularly all over him. And, no offense, Lee, but green is an ugly color."
Lee frowned at that but quickly brighten. "Nonsense! Green is a youthful and very powerful color! It is the color of my suit! It is the color of my youthful and spiritual energy! And it's the color of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!"
Tenten figured that Lee was beyond reasoning. "But...green, Lee! It's already bad that you...uh," She was going to say something about his unearthly thick and fuzzy eyebrows, but she didn't want to hurt his feelings. "...have to wear green all the time. People might start..."
"--Throwing rocks at you." Neji jumped in for the first time.
Lee and Tenten blinked at the usually silent Hyuuga prodigy. "Why would any one throw rocks at me?" Something clicked inside of Lee's head. "Neji, was that a...a pun?"
Neji smirked. "No, but I wouldn't doubt if they do start throwing rocks at you, Lee." Neji than proceed to mentally picture a green-haired Lee running and ducking as random people threw many different rocks at the poor boy. It was quite comical sight in his head. "On second thought, go for it."
Lee, obviously not a mind reader, flashed Neji a bright smile. "I knew you'll see it my way, Neji! Thanks for your support!" He picked up one of the boxes and read the directions on the back. It confused him. "...I have no idea where to start."
Tenten rolled her eyes. "Maybe the best place would be your bathroom." She gently smacked him on the back of the head, obviously giving him a 'dummy smack'.
Lee sheepishly scratched the back of his head. "Um, Tenten? Could you help me?"
Tenten sighed. "Fine, it's your self-image you're destroying, not mine."
Lee continued to grin, as if not hearing what she had said after the word 'fine'. "Alright! Thanks Tenten!" He quickly picked up his supplies and waited for Tenten to follow him to his house.
She followed, but not before grabbing Neji. "You're coming too."
Neji frowned and said nothing, but inside, he was weeping like a little boy.
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The three reached Lee's house in five minutes. Lee, having his hands full, couldn't open the door and realized he left his keys inside. Tenten sighed and kicked the door in, much to Lee's protesting. He wanted to cry at seeing his door taken down like that. He'll have to repair it later...or get Gai-sensei to do it for him. Yeah, that'll work, because if he were the one to replace his door...he would be locked out (or in) for all eternity.
They stepped over the broken down door and entered Lee's small home. There wasn't much to look at and the broken door took up at least two fourths of the first room, which looked to be the sitting room/sleeping room whereas the small futon Lee sleeps on was folded against in a corner. They was one door, which lead to the bathroom, and a small room on the left side of them which was the kitchen. Lee opened the door to the bathroom with a nudge of his foot.
He gratefully placed his supplies down and waited for Tenten to start. Tenten released her hold on Neji, secure that he was not going anywhere, and took one of the cartons. "Are you sure, Lee? It is reversible, but that'll get really annoying."
Lee nodded, his youthful determination sat in his black eyes. "Hai! I am as ready as I'll ever been, Tenten! Do your work with youthful exuberance, as I know you will!"
Lee sat down at the edge of the tub, waiting for Tenten to 'work her magic'. Neji started to wonder why he was even there.
"I'm starting to wonder why I'm even here." Neji wondered, but was ignored. He growled and leaned up against the door frame, sulking. "Make it quick..." He murmured, transfixing his gaze on a spot on the floor.
"Sheesh, you're an impatient one." Tenten teased, sticking her tongue out at the still sulking Neji. His eyes were closed and therefor, didn't see the pinkish tongue she stuck at him. She then went to work on Lee, who was so excited, he could barely contain himself.
Two and a half hours late, they were finally done. It took them longer than they thought. During that time, Neji's eyes stayed close and they soon realized that he fell asleep...while leaning against the door frame as slight snores escaped him. He even muttered a few incoherent words and twitched as if he was chasing something. They were waiting in anticipation for him to fall over, but it never happened.
Tenten stood up and looked at her handiwork. "Um, not bad, I guess...look...in the mirror."
Lee grinned as brightly as the sun in the sky as he jumped in front of the mirror to see how beautiful his hair was. Nothing came from his mouth for five whole minutes as his wide eyes stared at his reflection in mute shock, but then; "WOW! I look even more youthful than before! Thanks, Tenten!" Lee hugged Tenten, nearly crushing her bones.
"Eh...you're...you're welcome...Lee..." She gasped out.
Neji awoke from Lee's shouting and regretted it. "Good god!" He stumbled back, covering his eyes.
Lee continued to grin at his rival and teammate, his now green hair, shining almost as brightly as his smile. Lee, all in all, looked either comical or...scary. Neji obviously thought the latter of the two.
"Lee..." Neji started, taking a moment to compose his thought.
"Yes, Neji?" Lee asked, unaware of the turmoil that went on through the young man's mind.
He took a deep breath. "As there is no easy way to tell you this, I will straight out say it; You look like you have a green...monster living on your head."
Lee frowned at that. "I do? I was going for something along the lines of a green and youthful turtle."
"Monster." Both Tenten and Neji said at the same time.
"I'll think it'll start mutating if you keep it on your head long enough." Tenten said, giggling.
Lee shrugged. "I think it looks great. I shall go off now and show Gai-sensei!" With that, Lee ran from his house, tripping over his broken door, and ran down the street in search of his favorite sensei.
Both Neji and Tenten stared after him. "I'll give him one hour before he comes back begging to change his hair back." Tenten said, still watching the empty space where Lee once stood.
Neji shrugged. "I'll give him fifteen minutes."
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As Lee searched every possible place for his sensei, people stared and they stared hard. Most of the folk stared with open mouths that literally fell past their chests. A few stared dumbfounded, eyes refusing to remove themselves from the walking green...person.
Someone took Village of the Leaf a little to seriously. They should remind him that this was Konoha; Village Hidden in the Leaf, not Konoha; Village of the Leaf People.
Because, that's what he looked, a giant walking green leaf.
But some of the younger villagers thought it was funny because as soon as they sat eyes on the walking leaf, they would just stare in shock and then, after three whole seconds, fall over laughing, most of them rolling in the ground, holding into their sides.
However, Lee paid it no mind as he made his way to find Gai-sensei, and after he would find his sensei, and they would hug and the older man telling him how much that new hair color matches his soul, he would find Sakura, and she would fall head over heels in love with him, because she loves guys with green hair! Right?
It took him exactly ten minutes to find Gai-sensei, eating at Ichiraku with Kakashi-sensei, Asuma-sensei, and Kurenai-sensei.
"GAI-SENSEI!" Lee shouted with joy as he found him.
"Ah! Lee, I was--" As Gai turned around, as did the others, color drained from all of their faces, including the Ichiraku's shop keeper and his daughter.
Lee continued to grin in that oblivious way of his.
"Lee! What have you DONE to yourself!" Gai shouted, horror stricken as the others in the group snickered.
Just than, Naruto decided to join the group. "Hey, hey every--AHHHH!" Naruto shouted, taken aback by the green haired ninja in front of him and falling promptly on his rear. "Fuzzy Brows! Your--your!" Naruto couldn't finish as he burst out laughing. "Hahaha! You look so...so! HAHA! Dude, you look...look..." The correct words still fail to reach his lips as another wave of intense laughter burst forth.
Lee blushed in embarrassment and turned to Gai-sensei's still gawking form. "Gai-sensei...is my hair really that laughable?"
Gai quickly snapped out of his daze. "Wha? Oh! Of course not, Lee! Your new look is...eh..."
"Hilarious!" Naruto offered to the stammering man.
Lee pointed a finger at Naruto. "Naruto, you know nothing of Green Beast's beauty!"
Naruto sobered for about two seconds before bursting out laughing again. "Green beast! I get it! I get it! HAHA!"
Gai ignored the laughing Narutard...er, Naruto and continue to look at Lee's green hair, willing himself not to poke it. "Lee...why did you change your hair color?"
Before he could answer though, a gasp sounded behind them. Lee spun around to lay eyes upon his beautiful 'angel'.
"Sakura-san!" He shouted enthusiastically. "Look! I changed my hair color!" He said, pointing a finger at the green mop on his head.
Sakura couldn't take her eyes off of it. "Lee-san...your...hair..."
He nodded. "Yes, Sakura-san! You said you liked guys with green hair, didn't you?"
She blinked, forcefully tearing her eyes away from his hair and to his eyes. "Huh? When did I say that?"
Lee frowned. "You didn't say you like guys with green hair? But I overheard you talking to your friend yesterday!"
Sakura continued to blink in confusion until it all started to become clear and she softly laughed. "Lee-san, I said I like those green pair. Where in the world did you get 'I like guys with green hair' from that?"
Naruto was still laughing. He was laughing so hard that he was starting to turn blue in the face and oxygen was no longer going to his brain.
Kakashi lazily watched him. "Naruto, you should probably stop laughing so hard. You'll quite literally die of laughter."
But Naruto couldn't stop, and therefore, he passed out from lack of oxygen. Kakashi shook his head, turning back to his food.
Lee face fell. "Oh..."
Sakura felt sorry for him. "But, um...you look really nice, Lee-san!"
Lee's eyes instantly lit up like a Christmas tree at her words. "Do you really think so, Sakura-san?" At her somewhat hesitant nod, Lee jumped in the air. "Yosh! Sakura-san thinks I look nice! I will never, for as long as I live, change my hair back to its natural color for it will remain this glorious green, forever!" With his speech, Lee ran off into the distance, leaving everyone behind in awe.
All eyes glared at Sakura and she sweatdropped. "What?"
Kakashi sighed. "Looks like we have more than glistering teeth to blind us."
Everyone agreed, except for Gai, who had tears in his eyes and Sakura, who had confusion in hers.
Lee could be heard in the distance shouting about love, youth, and green hair.
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AN: That was...kinda weird, no? O.o Please, no flames. I also decided to continue it, so stay tune for chapter 2!