This a new one, hopefully miles better than my first. Read and review, thanks a million for choosing!
Edwards point of view.
Chapter 1 -The immeasurable void.
"It will be as if I never existed…"
The words that ruined her life, and ended it. My foolish, selfish reason to leave her seemed childish now. She had already made her choice. She made another when I left her: Me or nothing. She chose nothing.
Rosalie's thought swirled around in my head, like a headache they pounded. The truth seemed as if filled with lead. So Bella had really jumped off a cliff. The only verification was Alice's vision, which weren't always true.
I ran until I could smell the lingering scent of her blood, mangled with the scent of salt water. The scent was stale, as if it was dying. Could I save her? I looked at Bella's beautiful, pale face. Her body looked broken and fragile. I waded through the water calmly. The freezing water should have stung my skin with cold, but it didn't. I swam as fast as I could to her floating body, I didn't care who saw now.
Was it really true? Had she died already?
She was sinking slowly underwater, going deeper and deeper into the crushing oblivion. I could see her brown hair floating in the water, her face had no expression, she almost looked like she was sleeping. I scooped her into my arms and brought her to the surface. Why did this have to happen to her now? I knew she hadn't got the best luck, but this wasn't just bad luck.
It was my leaving that propelled her to talking her own life. She had a soul, a life to live. And I took it from her, I was nothing more than a thief who stole her heart and her life.
I placed a hand on her cold chest, she had no heartbeat, I let out a dry sob. She was dead. I held her in my arms tightly, so tightly that I heard a crack in her ribs. That didn't stop me though. I didn't want to crush her but I wanted her to wake up. Wake up form the pleasant sleep she was permanently under now. Everyone now crowded the scene. Their thoughts were harsh,
Did she really intend on suicide?
I didn't let Bella go until the damned paramedics arrived. They coaxed her put of my arms which were fixed across her broken body. I gave up when they touched me, I was to weak to fight or get emotional. I just felt empty and heavy. Everything felt surreal, like it was a horrible nightmare. Maybe I was finally in hell…
They carted her off in an ambulance, I remember when she didn't want to make a fuss and refused to go into an ambulance. She would be complaining if she were alive. Even though she was dead, she looked beautiful.
"Death hath not sucked the honey from thy breath." I murmured to myself. She was now on her way to heaven and I was left here in hell. I desperately wanted to go with her.
Charlie's cries were loud and heart-shattering, his only daughter was taken away, by me. He sat next to me in the ambulance. I didn't want to read his thoughts at this fragile time. I could tell he blamed me, whether he meant it or not, it was true.
It was through my own foolish actions that led to this disaster. I stared at the white blankets that covered her body. I noticed her arm was dislocated, probably from my grasp earlier or from the fall. It hurt to see her like this
Her face was visible as the blankets only covered her body. Her eyes were closed, thankfully, her eye lids had turned purple from the cold, as did her thin lips. Bruise-like shadows covered the bags that were underneath her closed eyes. Her skin was now very pale, almost grey. She could have passed for a vampire. I brought myself to read Charlie's thoughts to end the awkward silence.
I hope he feels the pain that I feel now it was all his fault, he should have never left. He probably didn't know how she was going to react, but he knew this could have happened.
I knew this was meant for me. The comment stung but I knew he was right. He was looking at her like I was looking at her. He got his wish, I felt the pain. I might be bold and say it was worse because I knew it was my fault. I had killed my beautiful Bella, my only .
She was pure and whole and now dead. At least she never had to live with the shame that I had now.
The hospital was grim, the dirty white walls seemed to be plastered with confessions, the death of Bella made people think twice about . I overheard Mike's confession to Jessica.
" I had always liked her," She looked at him in admiration,
"I know." She replied sullen. Everyone was solemn for her death, she was d beyond what she knew. The doctors moved around the group of people sheepishly, careful of our reaction. I hadn't felt the need to talk or breath anymore.
I watched Carlisle break the news to Charlie. We all held bated breath.
"Bella is dead, I'm dreadfully sorry. She had a concussion and drowned in the water." Carlisle's calm voice added to the misery.
Can I say goodbye?" Charlie choked through tears. How I wish I could cry for Bella, to have at least one human feature to prove my for her.
"Of course." He led Charlie to the table where Bella lay, We all filed out to give him privacy. He bent down to Bella's level.
"I'm so proud of you still, Bella. I forgive you for taking your own life. I should have supported your condition." Condition? I searched his mind for a reason for the use of word. I certainly found one, Millions of images of Bella sprang into his mind like a slideshow, they all showed her after I had left her. She looked the same as she did on the table. Unhealthy pale skin and the shadows underneath her eyes. He remembered a conversation that they had after I left. He walked carefully around her, didn't mention my name, or anything to do with me. She talked in a dull monotone, the light had already left her eyes. I shuddered at the awful mess I left her as. "We should have helped you, maybe you should have seen somebody." He started crying again, he choked the last goodbye out from fat tears trickling down his cheeks. "I just love you so much, Bella!" He planted a kiss at the top of her forehead and walked away reluctantly.
People in their droves walked in and out. They all left when they said their last goodbyes to Bella, I wanted to be last. The very last person to wish her off to heaven.
"May I ?" I asked Carlisle when everyone had left. He led me to the door. I poured my feeling out to her. I wasn't going to hold back form her. "Bella, love," I began, I swooped down, kneeling beside her. Since she had did, her glorious, beautiful scent had been taken with her. "You will always be on my mind, you hardly ever left." I admitted, "You were devastated by my departure, which I want to admit was stupid and futile. My reason, selfish. I wanted you to be human, and if anything I made you less human." I took her cold hand in mine. "I always wanted you, I lied when I said I didn't want you, I only needed you to believe me. I love you, Bella. I always did, more than you ever knew."
I stared at her closed eyes, wishing they would, somehow, open and her beautiful serene smile would greet me. No such luck, they remained closed. She remained motionless. "Thus with a kiss, I die," I kissed her pale, unmoving lips. They were cold and dead. I left the room silently, as soon as I left the company of humans I ran to first beach, I had already broken the treaty, I couldn't have cared less if Jacob started a fight with me. I would have let him win, and kill me. I believed I deserved what I got.
I trudged along the sandy beach, thought swam through my head. I climbed up to the perch where she jumped from. The scenery was harrowing, yet beautiful. I glanced at the harsh sea, thrashing below me, it spat angrily at me, the waves writhed under the blanket that expanded across over the horizon. I raised my hands above my head and clasped them together, I curled my toes out over the precarious cliff end. I exhaled and dove straight down into the fuming ocean.
The wind rushed past my emotionless face, it burned my closed eyes. It felt oddly freeing and adrenaline pulsed through my empty veins. It was my tribute to Bella, I did this for her. The cruel water parted gently to allow me to plunge into it, The freezing water didn't make me even shiver, it made no difference to me. I swam to the bottom, the water got colder as I pressed further into the pressure. I searched for something, anything that remained me of her. She had to have misplaced something in the water. I wasn't disappointed. A metallic glint pricked my eyes, I glided towards it.
A bracelet lay limply on the stony floor. I grasped the jewellery praying for a good sign. I cleaned the item while surfacing. The fresh air hit my face with force. I had no need, yet I gasped for air out of habit. The sliver bracelet was indeed simple, yet pretty. It was a plain snake-chain silver bracelet. I smelt it to be sure. I hoped the scent would still be evident. I breathed in the scent of the bracelet, the feint smell of Bella hung there, mingled with the fresh scent of sea. I had so pleased to smell her one last time, the potency was lost, it smelt watery and weak. I was still thankful. I pushed it onto my wrist, not wanting to lose another part of her.
I swam to the cliff face, I gripped the cliff, pulling myself upward onto the dry land. I looked back at my empty life. I searched around, paranoid about witnesses. But my worst nightmare when I saw a flash of wild, red hair floating in the breeze.