I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE FOLLOWING:
THE TITLE = THAT BELONGS TO BRENDON BOYD URIE, SPENCER JAMES SMITH, DECAYDENCE, AND FUELED BY RAMENTHE BAND = PANIC! AT THE DISCO BELONGS TO BRENDON URIE, SPENCER SMITH, DECAYDENCE, PETE WENTZ, AND FUELED BY RAMENTHE BAND = THE YOUNG VINES BELONGS TO GEORGE RYAN ROSS III, JON WALKER, AND WHOEVER THEY'RE RECORD COMPANY IS _THE CHARACTER = BRENDON BOYD URIE IS NOT MINE AS UCH AS I WOULD LIKE HIM TO BETHE CHARACTER = GEORGE RYAN ROSS III IS NOT MINE AS MUCH AS I WOULD LIKE HIM TO BE [[IN BED]] _ xDTHE CHARACTER = SPENCER JAMES WALKER IS NOT MINE AND REALLY IS REAL LIFE BEST FRIENDS WITH RYANTHE CHARACTER = JON WALKER…I DON'T WANT HIM; I DON'T OWN HIM; I DON'T WANT TO OWN HIM. NUFF SAID.THE MENTION OF = PETE WENTZ. AS MUCH AS I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE HIM, HE BELONGS TO ASHLEE SIMPSON, WHOM I'VE RESPECTED FOR MOST OF MY LIFE….OR AS LONG AS SHE'S BEEN FAMOUS xDTHE LYRICS = "THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH JUST A TASTE OF WHAT YOU'VE PAID FOR" THOSE ARE FROM THE MIND AND CREATIVITY OF BRENDON AND SPENCER… PROLLY MOSTLY BRENDON SINCE HE WROTE THE SONGTHE LABELS = DECAYDENCE IS PROPERTY OF…I THINK PETE WENTZ; FUELED BY RAMEN IS SOME COMPANY THAT OWNS THEM ALL LIKE A BOSS;I'm pretty sure that's it :]
it there's any legal issues, let me know, i'l continue adding disclaimers T_T
Pairing: RYDON & JONCER
RATED: PG-13 FOR DRUG AND ALCOHOL ABUSE
A/N: I wrote this for school for my health class... that's why there's underlined words... just ignore that _
btw... this is all fluff... not hardcore Yaoi like most of my stuff...
The Ballad of Mona Lisa
Brendon knew Ryan wouldn't come back to him anytime soon. In fact, He would probably be back for years. Jon had gotten his evil clutches on him and took him with him when he left the band. They still see each other as friends and go out for drinks from time to time, but with the new CD being released, they had no time for many social gatherings. It was clear that Spencer missed his best friend and Jon. Unfortunately Ryan and Jon shared a vision of creating a band that was like The Beatles. I had no idea how they'd make it; The Beatles were from the 70's, they're legends but that type of music isn't popular anymore.
Brendon took the initiative though and told them to leave if they weren't happy with the way he was choosing the music. He still remembers the hurt look Ryan gave me when Brendon told him to leave. Now they're all facing the consequences of arguing about the music. Ryan and Jon have no idea if they're really going to make it in the music industry. Ryan has his looks and voice and Jon… well Brendon can't much about Jon since he basically hates him, but their music isn't that amazing. When Brendon wrote that song about wanting to live a life from a new perspective he didn't know it would lead up to him and Ryan breaking up. They were really the perfect couple and they broke up due to artistic differences in their music; it really wasn't fair.
Ryan had always had poor self-esteem so when Jon told him that he had an amazing chance of being the lead singer again by starting a new band: he got nervous because it had been so long since he was in the spotlight by himself. Ryan loved Brendon too much and didn't want to hurt him, but it ended up breaking them apart and really hurting Brendon in the process. Brendon had to start writing all the music once his boyfriend left which caused immense internal pressure. Sure, he had used to write lyrics by himself and sometimes he'd collaborate with his boyfriend early Saturday mornings in bed when they were too lazy to get up, but now all he had was Spencer, Ryan's best friend. Pete empathized with the four of them especially since it led to 2 relationships ending, but he tried to convince Ryan to go back and stay with his P!aTD family especially since he was still under contract with Decaydence and Fueled By Ramen, but he declined. Ryan knew what he wanted to do, no amount of peer pressure was going to change his mind and make him go back to the band. It broke Brendon's heart the second Ryan walked out the door for the last time, not even bothering to take one last glance of his 5 year boyfriend.
Ryan was sitting around his tour bus completely drunk waiting for Jon to come back in from partying all night with random strangers. Spencer was not going to be happy when he finds out that his boyfriend is partying all night and getting baked with random strangers. He was happy for Spence though; he was still able to call Jon his boyfriend. Ryan suddenly heard a knock at the door and got up to answer it, barely able to stand on his feet. Getting drunk was definitely not something he was used to, even though he'd been going it multiple times a week since he left Brendon in July 2009, almost 2 years ago. He slowly reached the door and pulled it open, he expected Jon to be there lying on the ground, but instead to his surprise, Brendon was standing there, wearing the glasses he almost never wore before. Ryan was sure he was hallucinating from the high amounts of alcohol in his bloodstream at this moment, but when Brendon reached his hand out and touched his face, he knew that it was real. Ryan didn't know what to do. Almost two years of not being this close to him, he was scared. All of a sudden he felt sick. He knew it was not a good moment for Brendon to be standing there in front of him, because in a few seconds it would be a big mess. Definitely not drinking for awhile after this, he thought as he barfed all over the entryway of the bus. Brendon stepped out of the way just in time, and rubbed his back gently when he was done.
As if nothing had changed between in the nearly two year gap, Ryan was sitting on Brendon's lap, crying rivers. Brendon looked around and saw about four empty bottles of what looked like gin around the couch where it looked like Ryan had been laying before he answered the door. He looks back at the older boy sitting in his lap and wonders why he's been drinking so much. Ryan never used to drink, he barely even smoked. Ryan used to be one of the most straight edge people he knew, that's what he loved so much about him, that his values and ethics could never be swayed.
"Ryan…," Brendon whispered and Ryan looked up at him.
"Brendon, why are you here?" Ryan asked voice hoarse from the bile in his throat.
Brendon looked into his eyes which still seemed to not focus on him, "I needed to check up on you; Spencer said he was worried that you haven't been answering his calls for awhile and we're playing a show a few cities over so he wanted me to come see how you were doing."
Ryan looked up at him, unsure what to say.
Brendon knew this would never get anywhere if they just stayed on the front steps and Ryan smelled of barf and didn't want to talk. Brendon gave Ryan a little shove so he could stand up and lead him through the bus. Ryan stood up and waited for Brendon to follow suit, watching him while he stood and brushed himself off. Ryan was still confused about what to say he could barely stand, he didn't know if he could even have a conversation with him. Brendon grabbed Ryan's wrist and pulled him through the bus, stopping only for a second to pick up a few clothes of what he assumed were Ryan's, then continued to the bathroom.
He helped Ryan undress then turned on the shower. Ryan wasn't bothered by standing naked in front of him, they had been like this thousands of times before. Brendon helped Ryan in and rolled up his sleeves to help wash him since Ryan basically collapsed onto the shower floor. Ryan kept his chocolate brown eyes on him the whole time, watching Brendon's facial expressions. After almost two years and he greets him by nearly barfing on him and then getting washed by him; it was comical. He giggled lightly, getting a little bit of the shower water in his mouth. Brendon's eyes shot to Ryan's face and he tilted his head in confusion. Ryan just gave a little smile and closed his eyes and let the water continue to pelt him. He only opened his eyes again when he felt the water stop and Brendon standing up to grab a towel.
Brendon helped Ryan stand and started drying him and threw the towel on his head when he was done so he could turn to pick up Ryan's clothes. They had still barely spoken and haven't said anything during that whole thirty minutes of being in the bathroom. Brendon helped Ryan get dressed then proceeded by drying his beautiful, soft brown hair, making it look fluffy like a baby bird's feathers. Brendon smiled and then threw the towel onto the floor and grabbed Ryan by his wrist, too scared to hold his hand, and pulled him out of the bathroom and to his bunk. After Ryan sat down, Brendon climbed on and laid down pulling Ryan down to lay next him. Ryan was looking at Brendon, eyes slightly wide, expectant as to what he would say.
Brendon's head was so full of conversation starters that he wasn't sure where he should begin or if his head would spontaneously combust. He looked up at the ceiling and opened his mouth to talk, closing it for a second, then opening it again; Ryan thought he looked like a fish when he did that.
"Ryan," Brendon said, finally able to say something, "I miss you so much. It's just not the same without you there."
"Bren."
"Ryro, let me talk okay?" He looked over at Ryan watching him nod slowly, hesitant.
"I really miss you. I've been having such a hard time without you and it's so confusing without you. We were so perfect for so long, and you left without a word. We see each other sometimes, but it's not the same. I need you back in my life Ry." He paused, thinking over what he'd say next. "I don't necessarily mean I want you back in the band, not that I don't, but I don't want to pressure you into doing something that you should decide on your own. I mean that, I think we should start…dating again, if that's even the right word for it. I want it to go back to the way it used to be. You didn't used to be a boy that would spend all night alone drinking alcohol by yourself, hell, you didn't even drink at all. You have the right assets for starting a new band and succeeding which you did, with Jon. As much as I hate him, I am grateful for the fact that he took care of you for awhile…speaking of, where is he?" Brendon looked at Ryan again who looked away.
"He's out… somewhere… most likely getting baked with strangers. He hasn't been around too much lately unless it's for practice or a concert. I think he might be cheating on Spence…" Ryan looked back at Brendon who looked extremely pissed.
Not only did Ryan get taken away by Jon, then started a new band, ditched his Decaydence contract, and break up with Brendon without so much as a goodbye, but now the only person Brendon was hoping he could count to take care of the boy he loves when he's not there is nowhere to be found and possibly cheating on Ryan's best friend. This was not okay with Brendon in the least.
Brendon sighed and continued talking, "So you have no idea where he is? Isn't he supposed to be your band mate? And he's not here?" Brendon sighed again.
Ryan reached a hand out and gently touched Brendon's face, which caused Brendon to close his eyes. Ryan carefully studied the boy he's missed for so long. All of the external pressures around him including Jon trying to get him to smoke pot with him were starting to tire him down. His integrity and morality have been corrupted once he left Brendon's side. He had had an action plan to start his new band and a new life away from Brendon, but everything had gone wrong along the way. He was lost, and as his fingers lightly traced Brendon's lips, all his memories came back. All the memories of hanging out with Brendon and Spence, all the memories of doing gigs together and all the stage kisses that made the girls scream, all the times he'd sneak into Brendon's bunk in the middle of the night when he couldn't sleep, all the times Brendon had said "I love you" when no one was looking then lightly kissed him on the lips before returning to his guitar all came flooding back into his mind and he started to cry.
Once Brendon had noticed that the older boy next to him was crying, he pulled him closer and kissed him on the forehead whispering things like "it's going to be okay" and "I'm here, don't worry". Brendon couldn't stop think about what Ryan had said about Jon being missing all the time and possibly cheating on Spencer. He definitely couldn't forgive all the hardships that he's caused Ryan and he never wanted to leave Ryan's side.
They were woken up by a beam of sunlight shining in their eyes. Ryan could've sworn it was just a dream and that none of it had happened; he never opened the door and Brendon was standing there, Brendon didn't help give him a shower while he couldn't stand, Brendon didn't hold him while he cried, it all had to be a dream. As soon as Ryan opened his eyes he knew it wasn't a dream and that made him want to cry all over again. Brendon pulled Ryan even closer than before and held on tight which Ryan tried his hardest not to cry.
"I'm sorry…" Ryan began sobbing loudly and he pressed his face into Brendon's chest. "I never should have left without a goodbye; I'm so, so sorry." Brendon shifted slightly, causing Ryan to move as well and watched as Brendon slowly pushed back the curtain where the small window was, he squinted his eyes as the sunlight shone through the window. He looked back at Ryan who looked so beautiful with the light on him. "You know, Brendon, you were right… I shouldn't have left… I love you, still. Even leaving without saying goodbye didn't change that."
"I know," Brendon said, leaning in to lightly kiss Ryan on the lips, "come on; let's go see if that idiot came back yet." Brendon, climbed out of the bunk, waited for Ryan to follow suit, then walked to the front of the bus with Ryan close behind him. They found Jon sprawled out on the couch with a halfway filled bowl lying on his stomach. Ryan walked up to him, removed the bowl, placed it on the table, and then poked him on the cheek. Jon barely moved, but opened his eyes slowly. His eyes looked around the room and landed on Brendon then they started getting wider as he realized that Brendon was real and he wasn't imagining him there.
"Omaigawdwhutareyoudoinghere?" he asked too quickly, "you're supposed to be on tour."
Brendon looked at him with distaste and said, "And YOU are supposed to be looking out for Ryan, not spending all night out getting baked with random people." With that, Brendon pulled Ryan by the wrist once more back to the back of the bus. They went back to Ryan's bunk and sat down. "Okay, he's here." Brendon said, exhausted. Ryan pushed his two index fingers upwards next to either side of his lips to form a forced smile; then he said, "Brenny, don't frown, smile; I'm here with you." Brendon looked at the love of his life and smiled, shook his head and said, "Ryan, don't do that, you look like Mona Lisa with that creepy closed-mouth smile." Ryan dropped his hands to his sides and giggled.
Brendon stayed over for a few more hours, sitting on Ryan's bunk and talking with him, telling him random things that've happened during the past few years. "We're working on a new album but we've been lacking inspiration lately. You're such a lyricist and without you, things got a little hectic at the beginning," Brendon was telling Ryan who leaned into him, "so we've basically got the style down more or less, but we've yet to come up with how the songs are going to be. It's really difficult but our goal is to be able to convince our fans that we're still there for them. At the beginning, right after you left, our resiliency started faltering and we were unsure about so much. But I kept hoping that one day you'd come back to us." Brendon smiled at Ryan and kissed him on the cheek.
Ryan smiled when Brendon's lips touched his cheek and a blush started forming across the bridge of his nose. "I've actually been really desperate to see you lately; that's why I've been drinking so much. I just haven't had the courage to call you. But then you randomly appeared at the door; I thought I was hallucinating. I keep thinking, 'well, I'll just keep making music with Jon, get enough money, and I'll come back to you eventually' but I guess I just gave up when I realized we weren't doing to good. People always come to our concerts, but our music doesn't sell very well. I guess it's only because I'm so good-looking," he winked at Brendon who chuckled at that comment, "So we've been taking a break for awhile and are just traveling around."
Brendon finally got the courage to entwine their fingers together and smiled at him again. "Ryro, I want to believe that you'll come back to me one day, and when you go, I'll be waiting. Then we can be together again, making music and snuggling. I love you so much, so give me a sign if you ever want to come back, okay?" Brendon got up and held Ryan's hand as they walked back to the front of the bus, passing a sleeping Jon on the way to the door. "I have to go, Spencer's waiting," Brendon whispered to him and kissed him on the lips on last time before opening the door. "I'll keep waiting for you, okay? Maybe I can write a song just for you, huh? I should make it a ballad and call it something like…." Brendon had no idea what he should call it.
Ryan squeezed Brendon's hand in his own and leaned in to kiss him and whispered against his lips, "how about: The Ballad of Mona Lisa?" Brendon nodded, gave Ryan a long kiss and said, "of course," agreeing with Ryan, "I love it."
Ryan watched as Brendon walked away and smiled once more before returning inside the bus. Brendon was going over possible ideas for the song in his head and the line that popped into his was, "There's nothing wrong with just a taste of what you paid for," thinking about all the guilt that Ryan felt for leaving the band. "I love him so much; he'll come back eventually," Brendon said as a black car pulled up and he opened the door and turned to look at the tour bus once more, noticing Ryan in the window waving to him. He waved back, smiling then got in the car, closed the door, said hi to Spencer, and began telling him the new ideas for their new album as they drove off, leaving Ryan and Jon behind.
~The End~
