Author's Note: I apologize for the late release of this story, but I came down with Foot in Mouth Disease over the course of this past week. Don't know what I'm talking about? Just go and read my fan fic story titled, "The Worstest Disease Ever," and you'll better understand why I had to take a short absence. Anyway, I'm feeling better, and with it being the last day of August, and one of my last days of summer vacation, before school starts up for me again on September 3, and I'm reduced to releasing one chapter or one 1 shot story each weekend, figured I'd get this story done, so as to not get off schedule, having to take more or less, a permanent hiatus for a while. And so, on with the story, and, I hope you enjoy it! Oh and one more thing. At first, it was going to be a one shot story, but I think it will go better being split up into 2 or 3 chapters. So, here's the first chapter, and, enjoy!
The Destruction of Spongebob Squarepants
Summary: Jesse Barrow, husband of Lil Deville, is a cartoonest and graphic designer for Nickelodeon, and must produce their newest Nicktoon, The Offspring, a spinoff of Rugrats and All Grown Up, looking at the children of the Rugrats. Jesse is all for doing the show, which they'd like to premier on August 11, 2041, 50 years post Rugrats premier, only he's got one problem. Spongebob Squarepants, as of September of 2038, is entering its 40th. season of existance, which scares Jesse because the show has gained so much popularity over the years, causing more or less, almost every other Nicktoon to fail, or end up getting canceled, causing their producers and so on, to lose their jobs, and with their only other income being Lil's beauty salon, they can't afford for Jesse's job to fall through. So it's up to Jesse, Lil, and all of the other original Rugrats and their other halves, which include Phil, Dil, Chuckie, Kimi, Tommy, Zack, Peter, Violet, Silvia, and Nicole, to head down to the bottom of the ocean, and destroy everyone on Spongebob Squarepants, and as a result, providing the spread of the feast that will be served at Didi's retirement party, as she retires from being a teacher. Can they do it?
Disclaimer: I do not own the original Rugrats or Spongebob Squarepants characters, they belong to their original creaters. Also, Jesse is owned by Jesse J. Barrow, while Peter is owned by TCKing12. I own Zack, Silvia, and any other OC's you don't recognize. I also don't own You Can't do that on Television, it's also owned by Nickelodeon, and you'll see why in the first chapter, why I bring this up.
Chapter 1, The Staff Meeting
It was Thursday, July 22, 2038. Jesse was sitting in a large room painted orange, lined with blue lockers, and filled with several other people in suits and ties, waiting for another annual staff meeting to start at Nickelodeon Studios. It would soon be time for his boss, and the head program director of the network, James Emmerson, to walk into the room, and start conducting the meeting. Jesse had been working at Nickelodeon Studios since 2032, ever since he graduated from college, and got his first assignment, to produce their latest nicktoon, Two and Up, a series that looked at the Rugrats during childhood, in between the end of Rugrats, and the beginning of All Grown Up. The show lasted three seasons, but just like practically every other nicktoon being produced at this time, it eventually, got canceled, as a result of their number one nicktoon, Spongebob Squarepants, gaining more popularity than Two and Up, and several others, that did about as well as a led balloon. Jesse feared the day he would get fired from his job, and with his wife Lil Deville back home in Sara Sota, running their only other source of income, her beauty salon, Glamourous Glories, while her hair salon was a big success, at times, it seemed as if her business barely brought in enough money for them to get by on.
Footsteps echoed throughout the room, as a large, obese man wearing a gray suit and red tie approached the front of the room. His dark brown hair, mushstach, and beard, staring the room in the face, as he approached the podium, and began to speak.
"May I have everyone's attention please, as I bring our annual programming meeting to order." Said Mister Emmerson, as he adjusted his tie and stood tall at the podium. The room died down, as all ears fell upon Mister Emmerson.
"As some of you may or may not know, we try to look three years in advance, so our producers have ample time, to get things together for the shows we wish to run on this fine network, which has been around for nearly sixty years come 2039." Continued Mister Emmerson, as he pointed to some powerpoint presentations on a large projector screen that stood behind him on the wall.
"Coming up in 2041, we here at Nickelodeon will be entering a huge milestone, as it will have been fifty years since the first nicktoons originally premiered on Nickelodeon. We have a bunch of plans to celebrate this remarkable milestone in Nickelodeon history, starting with the fifty year reunion on Sunday, August 11, 2041. At 10:00 AM and going until 11:30 AM, we'll be reairing the very first episodes of the very first three original nicktoons to hit the airwaves, which you all know were Doug, Rugrats, and Ren and Stimpy respectively. But not only are we planning to do that, but we also want to introduce a new way for youngsters to enjoy their Saturday nights, bringing back two programming blocks that aired during the 1990's and early 2000's, and combining them into one block, which will be known, as the Snickel-O-Zone." Continued Mister Emmerson.
"And what is, The Snickel-O-Zone?" Asked a scronny man with black hair from the back of the room.
"Why of course, it's a combination of Snick, and the Nickel-O-Zone." Replied Mister Emmerson.
"But most of us here don't know what those are." Said Jesse.
"Ah, that's right, most of you were born after those programming blocks were more or less, canceled back in the day. Well, Snick ran from 1993 through 2004, on Saturday evenings from 8 PM to 10 PM, airing such shows as Rugrats, The Amanda Show, One-Hundred Deeds for Eddie McDow, and All That during its run at one time. And the Nickel-O-Zone, was a weeknight program block that ran from 8 PM to 9 PM between 1998 and 2000, hosted by O, and ran shows like The Wild Thornberry's, Cousin Skeeter, The Secret World of Alex Max, Hey Arnold, The Journey of Allan Strange, The Mystery Files of Shoby Woo, and Kablaham." Explained Mister Emmerson, as he showed some slides depicting the Snick and Nickel-O-Zone logos, along with logos for the different shows that once aired during those particular program blocks.
"So let me guess, you want O to host Snick, and want to call it, The Snickel-O-Zone?" Jesse asked.
"Wow, you sure are smart. Yes, that's exactly what we're doing. And that reminds me Jesse. You have an important role in this particular programming block." Continued Mister Emmerson, as he displayed a slide on the projector with a picture of the infamous orange couch that was on Snick, but sitting on top of it, was the green O that would talk and babble during the ending credits of the shows that ran during the Nickel-O-Zone.
"Currently on the screen, is what will be our new logo for The Snickel-O-Zone." Continued Mister Emmerson.
"But what does this have to do with me?" Jesse asked.
"Well, we'd like you to produce one of the shows that we're planning to air during the Snickel-O-Zone. Obviously, Spongebob Squarepants will kick it off on Saturday evenings at 8:00 PM, followed by the show we'd like for you to produce, followed by One Thousand Deeds for Eddie McDow the Second, and ending it off with the spin off to All That, called All This." Continued Mister Emmerson.
"Again, what's my assignment sir?" Jesse asked.
"Your assignment, is to produce a show that looks at the second generation of the Rugrats when they are the age of the Rugrats when they were Rugrats." Said Mister Emmerson.
"So let me get this straight. The original Rugrats will be parents in my series, and the show will focus on their children, at the young ages of anywhere from 0 to 5-years-old?" Jesse asked.
"That's exactly what I'm looking for." Said Mister Emmerson.
"But why do you have to put my show on after Spongebob Squarepants, which we all know will be entering its fourty-third season at that point." Said Jesse.
"I don't know." Griped Mister Emmerson.
Just then, the sprinkler system came on in the ceiling, dumping water and green slime on to everybody.
"Why do we continue to have our annual staff meetings on the set of You Can't Do that on Television?" Asked a large man with red hair towards the center of the room, now covered in green slime.
"I don't know. Probably because it's one of the few areas in this building that's deserted, giving us space to host our meeting." Continued Mister Emmerson, as more water and slime hit his head, as a result of saying I Don't Know again in that last sentence.
"Why don't they just, remodel it, and take out the slime and water sprinkler system?" Jesse asked.
"Maybe because we're too busy producing new shows for our fine network, which, you'd better get on the band wagon with your new show, titled The Offspring, a spin off of Rugrats and All Grown Up. I want season one in my hand and ready to run as of August 1, 2041, to mark 50 years since Rugrats existence." Demanded Mister Emmerson, as he dried himself off with a towel.
"Pardon me for butting in, but shouldn't The Offspring air at 8, followed by Spongebob at 8:30 in the Snickel-O-Zone?" Jesse asked.
"No, no, I don't think so." Said Mister Emmerson.
"But Mister Emmerson, if you leave the schedule the way it is, everybody will basically tune in to catch Spongebob, and will more or less, turn it off after it's over, causing the rest of the programming to get very little ratings and recognition." Continued Jesse.
"And since when are you the program director all of the sudden?" Mister Emmerson asked in a harsh tone.
"Um… Uh…" Stammered Jesse.
"I thought so. Look, this is how the schedule goes, and let me tell you Mister Barrow. This show better do a better job than your last show, Two and Up." Said Mister Emmerson.
"You know very well that Two and Up did poorly because it aired on Sunday mornings at 9 AM following Spongebob, not only did it follow the hottest nicktoon, giving everybody their share of what they wanted before it aired, but Sunday mornings is a terrible time to air new shows. Everybody is at church, and unavailable to watch TV." Said Jesse.
"Look, you'd better make The Offspring, the most watched show on television by the end of season one, which I'm expecting at least ten episodes for your first season, or else, get ready to kiss the pavement, and hope your wife's little beauty salon brings in millions, as you'll be fired! Fired! Fired! If come the end of season one, your new show isn't doing any better than your last one did at the end of three seasons." Snapped Mister Emmerson.
"Yes… Mister… Emmerson… Sir…" Stuttered Jesse.
"Good, now get out and go get started on your project." Snapped Mister Emmerdson, as Jesse packed up his stuff and got up from his seat to walk out of the room, now covered in slime and water on the floor.
"You know what, I think I will. But right now, I need to see to heading home, which is 109 miles away from here. I need to pick up my brother-in-law Dil from Radioshack, as he had car trouble again this morning, and we're eating dinner at Munchies this evening." Said Jesse.
"Awe, I'm touched. Now get out!" Yelled Mister Emmerson, as Jesse sprinted out of the building, to his car, and drove so fast out of the parking lot of Nickelodeon Studios, you would think the building was on fire.
As he drove towards Sara Sota, he thought about the meeting. He never cared for his boss ever since he got the job as a Nicktoon producer back in 2032. He only kept the job because it helped pay the bills. He would enjoy his job so much more if his boss was nicer, and if Spongebob Squarepants would just go and die. After all, what do people think of that show anyway. Jesse couldn't stand the show himself, and the show would soon be entering its fourtieth season come September. In his eyes, it was time for the show to go, if his show, and any future shows that were coming to Nickelodeon, were to have a chance. As these thoughts continued to peerce through his mind, he put the top down on his convertible, letting the wind blow through his black hair, and the sun beet down on his face, as he put on a Deep Purple Greatest Hits CD and turned up the volume to full blast, escaping to the music, as he continued down the highway towards home, where he would pick up Dil from Radioshack and head to Munchies, where he would tell Dil, Phil and Lil all about what went down that day at the meeting, and see to formulating a plan, to get Spongebob Squarepants, canceled, forever.
Two hours later, Jesse pulled into the parking lot of the Radioshack in Sara Sota where Dil worked. He switched off the loud music, put the top up on his convertible, and walked up to the door. Upon entering the store and being greeted by the familiar doorbell sound that played whenever anybody would enter into a Radioshack store, he overheard Dil helping a customer. He noticed how different Dil was when at his job. No longer wearing the Sherpa hat on his head, his strawberry red hair, neatly brushed and lying a top his head. Wearing his traditional blue button down shirt and kackies. And no mention of aliens. The only hint of aliens to ever hit Radioshack was the ocasional alien flick that they would run on the TV's during the day while Dil was there, working his shift.
Just then, Walter, the store manager walked past Jesse. He was tall, with dark brown curly hair.
"I'm here to pick up Dil." Said Jesse.
"He's still helping a customer, but he should be finished shortly." Said Walter, as he went to a shelf to restock it with a fresh supply of batteries.
Jesse, tapping his feet impatiently, overheard Dil talking with this customer.
"We can offer you a two year service plan on this cell phone for only $99.00, since you are a new Sprint customer." Said Dil to the customer at the counter, a man of about 22-years-old, with black hair, wearing a gray vest, white button down shirt and blue jeans.
"Yes I'll take the service plan." Said the customer.
"Very well then." Said Dil, as he rung up the man's order, and finished the activation on his new phone.
"Now should you have any problems with this new phone, feel free to come back in and we'll be happy to help you with it." Said Dil.
"Thank you sir." Said the customer, as he took his purchase from the counter, and walked out the door to the parking lot.
Just then, Dil caught a glimpse of Jesse.
"Oh, Hey Jesse. Let me clock out, and I'll be ready to go." Said Dil, as he punched in some stuff on the computer behind the counter.
"I'm ready whenever you are." Said Jesse.
Dil left from behind the counter, making way for the next person to take over to take on the evening shift and see to closing the store. He headed to the back of the store for a minute, and returned, wearing his Sherpa hat, and no longer wearing some little badge that was on his shirt, that displayed his name and the Radioshack logo.
"So, we ready to head to Munchies?" Dil asked, as he walked up to Jesse.
"Boy am I ever." Said Jesse.
The two of them walked out of Radioshack, hearing the familiar doorbell sound as the door closed on the way out. They hopped into the car and drove in the direction of Munchies.
"So, how was your day?" Jesse asked.
"Wonderful! I had six cell phone sales today. All of which, were successful!" Said Dil.
"That's wonderful!" Jesse said happily, followed by a sigh, thinking back to his day.
"I take it you didn't have that wonderful of a day." Said Dil, as he took a cigarette out of his pocket, and was about to light it.
"Um, Dil, you know Lil doesn't appreciate smoking in either one of our cars." Said Jesse.
"Oh, sorry. I'll wait and smoke this when we get to Munchies, before we head inside." Said Dil, as he put the cigarette back into his pocket.
"So, again I say, let me guess, your day didn't go so well." Said Dil.
"Let's just say, to put it simply, I'm doomed." Said Jesse, as they turned into the parking lot at Munchies.
And, this, ends chapter 1. So what will Jesse tell the gang in chapter 2, and what's the plan, for getting rid of Spongebob Squarepants? We'll find out this and much more, in the next chapter, so please, do stay tuned!