Gabriella laid out the long, cold, couch by herself. Her face was tearstained and she remained silent as ever. As always.

It had all been so perfect. The world. And everything she'd had in it. And now it was nothing but an empty blur. She didn't want to remember it though. Nothing but him.

Something she knew she'd never have again. As long as she wished, she'd never have him again. And that killed her even more than the fact that she would never meet that flight of his and come running into his arms as he pulled her tighter into his grasp and he told her how much he missed her and how he fought for her. And only her.

Just three weeks ago she could have thought about that as something she could hope for. But now. It was too late.

Three weeks ago……………

"Gabriella I promise you. We'll be together baby" troy assured his girlfriend of 3 and half years.

She held onto him crying, shaking. She couldn't be calmed but he tried his best to help her.

"I-I-I knowww.. But I can't let you go!" she whimpered.

"But we have tonight. I'm coming back for you baby" he said softly.

He was leaving her. He was going to war. Fighting for his country, for millions of people but mostly for her.

They had just graduated from their high school in New Mexico and now it was to be fallen in pieces as her world shattered in front of everyone. Her world was him.

So they spent their last night together in their small house that troy bought them after he had asked her to marry him. The happiest day of her life. Their lives.

It was two weeks after the day she turned 18

All dressed in white

Going to the church that night

She had his box of letters in the passenger seat

Sixpence in a shoe, something borrowed something blue

And when the church doors opened up wide

She put her viel down just to hide the tears

Oh she couldn't believe it

She heard the trumpets from the military band

And the flowers fell out of her hand

More tears fell from her chocolate brown eyes onto the couch, their couch. She couldn't blieve how fast it had happened. Her life was gone. He was never coming back. And she had to face it. As hard as it seemed to her or anyone else.

She traced patterens with her fingers along the soft fabric that covered the couch. It reminded her of the way troy used to trace random patterns along her stomach when they kissed.

Flashback

"That's not fair!" gabriella laughed playfully at troy and slapped his arm.

"Hey! It's not my fault you are mentally challenged at playing guitar hero!" he laughed and pulled her closer.

They were now in troy's kitchen. It was really late but they didn't care. As long as they could be together and were alone they were fine. He pushed gabriella against the wall and pressed their foreheads together.

"But" he whispered huskily "I'm sure if you stayed after hours, I could teach you and we could "practice" together" he hinted around as he moved closer.

"Mmmm I think I would like that!" she answered.

He closed the gap and pressed his lips onto her gently. She grabbbd his neck and he pulled her small waist towards his body. The kiss deepened and and deepened. His hand was up her shirt and she'd managed to pull his off.

He Grabbed her hips and felt her soft stomach. Tracing circles and random pictures with his finger s as they lost themselevs in the kiss.

End of flashback

That brought her a small smile but was soon replcaed with more tears and soft sobs.

Baby wyh'd you leave me

Why'd you have to go I was cointing on forever and now I'll never know

I can't even breathe

It's like I;m looking from a distance standing in the background

Everybody's saying. He's not coming home now

This can't be happening to me

This is just a dream

She was now laying on her side. The empty house was quiet and she felt so alone. Her friends and famly were there for her. But she wasn't in the mood for sympathy. She was heartbroken and it was never going to someone took a lot from her.

The preacher man said, let us bow our heads and pray

Lord lift his soul and heal this hurt

Then the congregation all stood up and sang the saddest song that she ever heard
Then they handed her a folded up flag
And she held on to all she had left of him
Oh, and what could have been
And then the guns rang one last shot
And it felt like a bullet in her heart

Her arm was spread out so her right hand could almost touch the floor. She reached down and traced the wood with her fingertips. Shooting pains mocked her body. This was to much to bear.

She swallowed hard and then closed her eyes. I miss you.

Those words were like an echo in her mind.

She dragged herself off of the worn couch and walked across the floor. She felt this deep feeling of drowziness come back as her body stood upright. Her hands clasped over her locked up stomach. She couldn't remember the last time she felt hunger.

The dim light from the windows came through wooden blinds. They focused on her and the house.

She couldn't get away from it. The memories.

Always there. Always a reminder.

Everyones face showed their sympathy for her. Their pity that she didn't want. Why couldn't they just leave her alone? Wasn't it hard enough without all of this?

She glanced around their house.

Baby why'd you leave me
Why'd you have to go?
I was counting on forever, now I'll never know
I can't even breathe
It's like I'm looking from a distance
Standing in the background
Everybody's saying, he's not coming home now
This can't be happening to me
This is just a dream

Another flood of tears blurred her vision yet again. She didn't bother to wipe them away.

Gabriella dragged herself up the stairs to the bedroom. She walked into the small and dimly lit area. Blankets were draped over each window and the bed was strewn with comforters and random pillows.

A nights sleep was long gone. She could never sleep with the anxiety ripping through her.

Oh,
Baby why'd you leave me
Why'd you have to go?
I was counting on forever, now I'll never know
Oh, now I'll never know
It's like I'm looking from a distance
Standing in the background
Everybody's saying, he's not coming home now
This can't be happening to me
This is just a dream

She ran her fingers across the messy bed. The un slept in bed. It was too empty without Troy in it with her. She couldn't fall asleep without being in the grasp of his arms.

She gripped onto the white sheet with chagrin and choked back tears.

Were you and I set up to perish? No That was surely not it.

A piece of red fabric caught her eye, coming from the closet. She follwed it. Without hesistation she reached out and stroked the soft material of Troy's basketball jersey.

A hole ripped at her heart. She hadn't touch it since his final game. Three nights before he left…

The tears were cascading freely now and she sobbed loudly. She swallowed hard and pulled the jersey from the iron hanger.

Flashback…

Troy opened Gabriella's car door as they were now in the driveway of the small home he'd purchased for them. He held out his hand and gently guided her into the house.

He'd just won the championship game against West high. The seniors last game of the year. His last game. Maybe, but he didn't want to jump to that situation. It pained him too much.

Once they were inside Troy grabbed his girlfriends waist and pulled her into him. Urgent almost.

"Mmm" he moaned into the kiss he'd softly placed on her full lips.

Gabriella gripped the red jersey in her hands, pulling him closer.

"I love you Troy" she whispered against his lips, still holding onto the jersey.

Troy lightly caressed her face.

"As I love you Gabriella" his words were almost a whisper too.

Gabriella noted in her mind, she was going to remember the way this red wild cat jersey felt like in her small hands. A small yet distinct memory of her love.

End of Flashback

This is just a dream

Yeah, yeah.

She sobbed louder now.

She did remember how it felt. How it was warm against his skin.

More tears.

She slipped her small camisole off and pulled the red jersey over her head. She felt warm inside it.

Gabriella gripped the hem of the jersey, pulling the shirt up to her nose.

This was a risk…

She enhaled.

Her body was sent into histerics as the sent entered her lungs. The hole ripped deeper.

It smelled like him. Too the point that it hurt.

She hugged herself. Imagining someone else in her arms. No, she couldn't picture it. He just wasn't here anymore. Her arms dropped cold.

Then what was the point of me still being here? The dark thought crossed her mind but didn't leave.

Why should she suffer? Why? Why?

She was alone wasn't she? So honestly, what was the point?

Her heart pounded. Maybe there was a way out of all this pain. This suffering torture. This pure agony.

Her mind was torn. She wanted to end it right now. She could be with him if she wished. But, she knew he wouldn't want her to do this.

But he wanted to be with her right? So couldn't that over rule her ending it?

Confusion swept into her head as well.

He wouldn't want her to suffer. But, he wouldn't want her to end her life.

Even though it's already ruined. You've been taken from me. Why should I stay here alone when your not here. When your there. I want to be there. With you.

Not here.

Alone.

She collapsed to her knees and then just laid out on the hard floors. She crawled to the window. The pouring rain picked up and was turning violently.

She pressed her cheek to the cold bedroom floor and lay on her side.

In nothing but his basketball jersey and an old pair of silk shorts.

Her tears mocked the rain. They both fell down at the same rate. Furiously fast.

She rubbed the back of her hand across her cheek angirly.

Then pushed a stray piece of hair behind her ear and then retched at herself. He used to do that.

The cold floor was calming. Her eyes slid closed. Sleep was an ancient feeling. She longed to escape for a few hours, even if only her mind was at ease.

Why can't it be a dream. Please…

Then they opened again. She had to be strong. No…I can't be.

Troy. Troy please…

Come back…

His name sent more shockwaves through her mind. Her body riveted shakily and she lost her breath. Her heart burned.

This was horrible. This deeply furiated feeling was too much. It was all so hard.

Please just stop!

She begged her mind. Images of him came threw her mind. That day. That awful day that she learned his fate.

Flashback

Gabriella smiled at the picture in her hands. It was of her and Troy.

He had his arms around her waist and she had hers linked around his neck. Their foreheads were touching and they're lips just inches apart.

Her mother had taken it at their graduation party when they weren't looking. It was beautiful and it gave her hope. He was coming back. He had to.

It had been two weeks since his last letter. That wasn't like him, he usually answered much sooner. It scared her at first but she knew she had to be strong.

He was fine. She told herself to relax.

But of course, deep down, it terrified her. That feeling of unease, uncertinty.

She kissed the picture and set it back down on her night stand. Where it stayed each night, she could glance over at it and try to fall asleep.

She finger-combed her long brunette curls and sighed. They flowed down her back and swept against her slip nightgown she'd kept on from the previous night.

She longed to check the mail box, again. For the third time today but she bit her lip and decided against it. He wouldn't want her to be anxious, she needed to stay calm. For him.

The doorbell rang.

Her attention focused on that and she glided down the stairs to the front door, her short nightgown almost reflecting the bight july sun that came through their tall windows.

Her hand brushed the knob and she turned it expectedly.

Could it be?

No. She couldn't get her hopes up.

The pulled the door open. There stood Troy's brother,the commanding officer. One of the reasons troy was sent to fight. Her heart hammered in her chest.

"Gabriella…" He said. His head was hung low and his eyes were dull.

No.

Please not this…

He handed her a letter addressed to their house. But it wasn't the letter she'd been waiting two weeks for. It the letter she never wanted to see.

"this is for you" he told her quietly, watching her face.

Her heart hammered harder, then stopped all together.

She took the letter slowly and bit her lip hard. So hard it might've bled.

Her eyes glanced at it. Then she looked back ut at troy's brother.

Suddenly her bare feet were freezing on the hardwood floors. Chills swept up her arms. It was nintey degrees outside but her body felt as cold as ice.

She gaped at him, he finally spoke.

"He's…Gabriella, he's gone".

Her heart pounded up again. Too fast for her to breathe. She couldn't think, she couldn't move and then…

"NO!" she cried and fell to her kness. The tears were so fast she couldn't see. No. no please! She screamed in her mind.

He knelt down and put an arm around her.

"I'm so sorry, I couldn't believe it" he said as he tried to comfort his sister in law.

Gabriella moaned and the salty tears were like waterfalls.

It was all over now.

End of flashback

That was the worst memory she'd ever had. Her mind was burning as her heart.

She hugged her knees tighter. She flet the floor become colder beneath her again, just like that day…

That awful day.

She hadn't even opened the letter. It was on top of the coffee table in the living room. She didn't dare touch it. It'd all seem so real. She couldn't face that.

Her hands brushed over the wedding ring on her left finger. His promise to her. He was hers. And she was his. No one could change that. The ring, the jersey, and painful memories were the only thing she had left of him.

Along with the box of letters that sat gently in the passenger seat of his car. He'd left it here.

Just like me.

But I know you love me. You just can't be with me.

Her stomach churned and she closed her eyes. She moaned again in pain.

I'm going to be with you. Somehow.

That was it. She was done with this agony.

I can't stay here alone troy. I won't.

Her hands flew to her stomach. Months ago that could've been a possiblty.

They always wanted a family, but she wanted to wait until he got back.

Another deep sigh.

I'm coming.

She pulled herself up from the floor. The sky was dark and the rain seemed to go on and on and on.

Gabriella climbed onto their bed.

Troy I can't stay here.

"You don't have to". His voice answered her in her mind.

The deep pounding of her heart halted.

Troy?

"I'm here, baby". He whispered.

And suddenly he was.

She could see him. He was next to her on the bed and then she was in his arms.

He pulled her close and kissed her hair.

"I've missed you" he said no louder than a whisper.

I missed you too. I need you, troy.

"I'm not leaving you anymore. We will never be apart again, love" troys breath swept across her lips as close as their bodies were. Her body melted into his as he lay on top of her.

His lips crashed down on her soft shell-pink mouth and he kissed her passionately.

It felt so real.

Was it?

The heated kiss brought gabriella's mind to a thousand places.

He turned her over and she gently gripped the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head. Her hands traced his bare chest. A sense of need.

We'll be together again? She asked him.

"Yes. Forever and ever" he said against her lips.

His fingers were tangled in her silky black hair.

"You will never have to worry about anything Gabriella. Your coming with me. I know you can't stand this on your own, love. So you won't have to" he told her sweetly.

The light behind him was now more defined. It was like an outlining. Of an angel.

And soon her body was outlined as well. And all she could see was a blinding white. The bedroom was gone. His lips were hot against hers.

And they began into their neverending, breakless kiss.

They were both gone now. Happily they'd never have to be apart.

I love you troy.

"I love you too baby" he whisepered.

And they were gone.

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GOOD?? Its sad I know. Sry if its too long but I hope ya didn't skip parts or it wont make sense ;) ily guys and I hope u liked this. It was hard to write without crying. 33 shoutout to my chloe bear email me hun, I miss you.