Fault Line

The air was crisp as the leaves started to change color indicating the start of autumn. Small breaths of air left his mouth before spreading across his face as he stepped through them. The gravel crunched under his boots as he made his way up the driveway. The house loomed in the distance, its lumber siding warped from the weathered years. Vines grew up the chimney and if it wasn't for the low light coming through the windows it would have looked vacant. A deep growl sounded from the porch, the dog pulling tightly at his restraint, its memory locked on the last time they had been in contact. The front door opened seconds later, her raven locks the first thing he noticed. He attempted a smile but her eyes were cold and unforgiving.

He was expecting it though hell if he was being honest he expected to have a shotgun aimed at his chest the second she laid eyes on him. He could only run for so long and he steeled himself as reached the stairs.

"You shouldn't be here."

Stopping with the toes of his boots grazing the bottom step, he relaxed his stance. Keeping his eyes locked on her face he nodded once. "I know."

The dog let out another low growl in warning as he got too close, not willing to back down until she assured him that the man standing in front of them wasn't a threat. She studied Merle for a minute before deciding against her best judgment because she was curious as to why he was showing up after all these years. She didn't move forward but instead turned around, opening the door and waiting for him to accept her silent invitation. Taking the opportunity, the wooden steps creaked beneath his weight and he barely hesitated in passing her in his way into the small alcove at the door. Everything was just as he remembered it right down to the opened book on the end table with her glasses lying on top. The same ones she refused to wear outside of the house. She shut the door but kept her hand on the knob needing the reassurance that she could escape quickly if she had to.

"Place looks good."

She didn't comment and the mistrust in her eyes was almost too much to bear. Watching his form fill the empty space she suddenly remembered just how meaningless her home, and life, was. Her tongue pressed to the roof of her mouth and she shifted her weight. Memories of him standing in her small living room, in their small living room, washed over her in a mix of emotions. She had worked too hard to get where she was after he walked out that door and him standing in front of her was like dangling a promise in front of a dying heart.

"You don't get to just show up here." She spoke up again and he could hear the pain laced through her words.

He gave a short nod. "Didn't think you'd answer if I called." He paused and let out a long breath as her expression refused to change. "It's been four years, Callie."

"I know what today is!" Tears welled up in her eyes as the hard exterior she was trying to hold started to crumple. Shaking her head she decided to take back the chance of giving in. He wasn't allowed to do this, he wasn't allowed to show up, and bring with him all the memories she had tried to scrub out of her head with copious amounts of alcohol and pills. Pushing down the handle she pulled open the door. "You should leave."

Avoiding his eyes she then walked away, leaving the door open for him, making her way up to the stairs to the bedroom. Her gaze immediately landed on the third drawer of her dresser where she had hidden the pictures she couldn't bear to have on the walls anymore. She was so lost in her grief that she hadn't realized he followed her. He touched her shoulder and though every fiber of her being wanted to pull away she reveled in the comfort.

"Didn't you hear me when I said goodbye?" Her words were a ghost of a whisper as she swallowed hard and she turned around. "What are you doing here, Merle?"

"Came to see my wife."

The words were so plain that her eyes flashed in anger, temporarily forgetting her grief. "I sent you papers."

"Got 'em," he pulled the envelope out of the inside pocket of his vest and tossed it onto the bed. "Is this really what you want?"

"I sent them, didn't I?" Callie crossed the room to put some space between them and pulled her shawl around her shoulders more, closing herself off to him.

He hummed a response in the back of his throat and she wished that he would just give up. It was what he did best; things got too hard or too real and he was out that door before she could even blink her eyes. He could handle the idea of being married. Callie was an easy going girl with more life than he had ever seen in anyone, a pure ball of energy he could never get enough of.

Everything had been going great until he came home from work one night and she was sitting at the bar in the kitchen with a blank expression on her face. He had made some comment, asking if dinner was ready yet, and when she didn't respond in her normal snarky remark about not being a housewife he began to worry. It wasn't until the words 'I'm pregnant' spilt from her lips that true panic set in. He had no qualms about moving in together, putting that simple band on her finger, or spending the rest of his life with the same person. Callie and that damn pup he bought for her was the only family he needed, only family he wanted. How was he supposed to be a father? He didn't know the first thing about raising a kid when his own daddy had been possessed by the devil himself.

For the first time in years Merle Dixon was terrified and without another glance in her direction he was out the door, never looking back. His father must have loved his mother at some point, right? They had him and almost a decade later they had Daryl but something changed. He had fully believed it was because of him and his brother that his father fell down the slippery slope, bringing everyone in his reach down with him as he went. He refused to be the reason the light in Callie's eyes went dim, he refused to be his father so he did the only thing he knew how to do and ran.

"Today, Merle?" Her voice cracked and try as she might she couldn't hold back the tears that slipped down her cheeks. "Of all days you could choose to show up here, why did it have to be today?"

He stepped around the bed, using his thumbs to swipe away the tears. He blamed himself everyday for walking out that door like some coward. In trying to protect his family from what he assumed would be the greatest devastation he only managed to pull them further apart. It was four years to the day that Callie had miscarried. He remembered it as if it were yesterday, the call he got from hospital and the fear that settled in his chest but when he showed up she wouldn't even look him in the eye. He thought giving her the space she so desired would be what was best but days turned into weeks, that turned into months, until it seemed she would never let him back in her heart again.

Callie didn't know how to grieve for something she never actually had. There was no beginning, no memories, so how was there an ending. She tried to fill the hole in her heart with alcohol but it barely numbed the excruciating pain she felt. She needed something more and when she showed up at Merle's old dealer's house the shock on Gary's face couldn't be hidden. Callie was a paying customer though and he handed over the same pills he used to sell to Merle. She had spiraled to the point that she was below rock bottom and the only choice she had was to give up. She thought about it too, giving in and letting the world take away her pain, but it was the coward's way out. She pulled herself up by her bootstraps and with the help of close friends and her brother in-law, Daryl, she had managed to get back to a functioning human being.

Merle didn't answer her questions as he continued to wipe away the tears that had no end in sight. "Breakin' my heart with these tears, darlin', but I need to know. Is this what you want?"

Callie rolled her wedding band between her fingers as her lip trembled, "I want to get out from under this weight."

Merle sighed, watching the love of his life break down in front of him. He tried to catch her line of sight but she refused to look at him anymore, not wanting to show him the truth behind the statement. "Didn't know I was weighin' you down."

"I'm barely keeping my head above water…"

The rough tips of his fingers from working with his hands for so many years, continued to rub at her cheeks and she loved how warm it felt. Try as it might, her heart began to twist again reminding her of all the pain. The familiar touch was too comforting but she knew better and took a step back, knowing if there wasn't space between the two of them she would give in. "I want to be able to breathe again, Merle. I can't breathe with you."

Remorse flashed through his eyes but he tried to recover quickly. "Ain't never tried to suffocate you…thought you wanted me gone."

"You know what I wanted?" She pushed past him, ripping the dresser drawer open and tossing the clothes to the side so she could get to the pictures. She grabbed the frame that held the first picture they ever took together and showed it to him, "I wanted this!" Callie threw it against the wall causing the glass to shatter into the same pieces her heart was in. She the next was from their wedding day and the only picture she had of him smiling. "You promised me forever!" She threw that frame as well as the next three not even stopping to see what pictures they were because they all held the memories and promises of what their life was supposed to be like. It wasn't until she grabbed the picture frame she had yet to fill that she paused. The display paper was still inside showing off a loving, happy, family. "This was supposed to be us," she whispered before smashing it against the dresser, the glass splintering and breaking the skin on her thumb.

Merle was in front of her in two steps her hand in his to check the damage. She had no more fight in her to even pull away from him and once he made sure there was no glass stuck in her thumb he gave her wrist a gentle tug, causing her to fall forward into his arms. Her forehead rested against his chest and when she thought she couldn't cry anymore a sob broke through. Here she was standing in the arms of the man that brought the pain in the first place but he was also the only one that would be able to take that same pain away.

"You came today," she mumbled, pulling away from him enough to so she could search those baby blues that gave away every word his lips never would. She could see the regret and the shame swimming around the edges with just a dash of longing right in the middle. After all these years, all the foul words, and her doing everything she could to push him away he still cared but better yet he still loved her.

She carefully reached her hand up to stroke the side of his cheek as if checking to make sure he was really there. The grip he had on her hips tightened and he turned his face into her hand. "Kiss me."

Merle didn't need to be told twice and the second their lips met her mind raced with every good memory they ever had. She opened herself up to him and he kissed her as if she was the air he needed to breathe. Wrapping her arms around his neck, he hoisted her up on top of the dresser, bottles of perfume clanking together and jewelry falling to the floor. He nipped at her neck and she tilted her head to give him more room. It wasn't until he went to take her shirt off that she stopped him.

"I want this," she assured him as she took his hand and placed it between her legs so he could feel the heat. "But we need to figure some shit out first."

Merle nearly growled into her neck, "Ain't nothing to figure out you're my wife."

Callie rotated her wedding band with her thumb with a deep sigh, "I am…and maybe I'm not ready to let this go."

"I could have told you that," he answered and at her confused expression a chuckle rumbled through his chest. "You may have sent the papers but you never signed them."

Her cheeks flushed a bit at her mistake and it brought out that smile she had been longing to see. "We do this then no more running." At his nod she pulled at his belt loops to get his attention. "I mean it Merle. I barely made it out alive last time…"

Merle leaned in and kissed her again but this time it was more than just rekindling the smoldering ashes into a fire, it was a silent promise to not cause that rift in their lives again. He was a husband, a Dixon, and he was going to make sure Callie got the light back in her eyes.