Bittersweet Emotions

Chapter One

Tokyo, Japan
July 22, 2006

Rin's eyes swelled up with tears as she lay on the street, rain pounding down upon her body, but she did not care. It was well past dark, and she was in the middle of nowhere, her body beaten and her clothing torn in her frantic attempts of escape. She closed her eyes, trying to block out the images, but she merely continued crying to herself. Was there no escape from her life? Was there no way to end the constant pain that continued to plague her every day that she lived? There was only one that she could think of; death. But he would not allow her to die. He would come looking for her, and take her back...then he would hurt her as he always did. Why would she have foolishly thought to marry someone like him? Why would she have believed she had the abilities to change him? To alter his nature? Because he had tricked her. He had tricked her into believing he was good a person at heart. He had tricked her into loving him for his own selfish purposes. He was using her, and she had found out. She had tried to run away, but he had caught her. She had tried to get divorce, but he refused. And now, here she was again. Waiting for him to come and find her once more. But...she was beginning to doubt he would come for her this time. Maybe he expected her to come back? If that was the situation, then the only way she was coming back was in a coffin.

Rin squinted her eyes as a bright light shone into the corner of them. She moaned and turned her head to see a car heading her way at a quick pace. She sighed. This was it then. She could finally escape this Hell-hole of a life, she could finally be freed from all the torture.

She narrowed her eyes when the car screeched to a halt, mere inches from her face. Looks like it wasn't her turn to die yet. What a shame...and here she thought she would finally get away with it, and he wouldn't be able to stop her. Unfortunately, it seemed that he got his way again...because when the car door opened, it revealed the exact person she was hoping to get away from.

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Tokyo, Japan
May 21, 2002

Kagome grinned as she walked into the small shop, looking at the young girl she had come to claim as her younger sister. Although they were still in highschool, they both had a job they worked at part-time in. Both she and Rin worked in the same place, due to Kagome's overprotectiveness over her "sister". Rin however, loved working in the flowershop. It was one of the only places she could go to get away from the daily struggles of her life. She worked as often as she could, simply to gain enough money to feed her younger brothers. Her mother had died in a bank hold up, and her father commited suicide soon after. Rin was alone at the age of ten to take care of herself and her brothers. She simply refused to go to an Orphan Home, in fears that they would be separated. She did not wish to lose what little family she had left, and it seemed that her brother's did not mind her decision. But once she met Kagome, it seemed that her luck had turned around. Her mother was kind enough to give them a home, but Rin still worked; just so she didn't feel like a burden. Kagome's younger brother Souta certainly didn't mind the two young boys; it simply meant more people to play videogames with.

"Rin, Miroku needs a basket of roses...again." Kagome said, rolling her eyes to herself as she spoke. Rin sighed. Miroku...the one person that was the most common customer, simply because of Sango, one of Kagome's close friends. Sango and Rin didn't talk much, nor with Miroku for that matter. But first impressions meant a lot, and Rin didn't really recieve a...good one, she could suppose. After all, being groped by someone you had just met isn't exactly a trusting move.

"When does he need it this time?" Rin asked as she went to fill out his order. Kagome shrugged.

"Who cares...let the guy hang, for all I care." Kagome said, completely serious, but Rin laughed regardless. No female liked Miroku...with the acception of Sango of course. She wouldn't admit it, but everyone knew she liked the young charmer. At the thought of being someone, Rin frowned slightly. Sango and Miroku could make a good couple...and Kagome was being asked out on dates at every turn, but...what about her? She had never been asked out, nor even complimented by a male for that matter. Was there no one for her? Was she simply a lost cause at love?

"Rin?"

She blinked, looking at Kagome. She had done it again...her mind had wandered off where it didn't belong and she had completely missed whatever Kagome was talking about. She sighed. "I'm sorry Kagome..." She muttered. Kagome shook her head and grinned.

"You should go home, Rin. You're working way too hard, not to mention school as well. You need to take a rest. Leave the shop to me!" Kagome grinned at the thought of running the Flower Shop. Rin however, was thinking the exact opposite. Leave a business to Kagome? Not in this lifetime...Kagome couldn't even organize a school dance properly, there was no way she could keep up with all the customers and orders that came in day to day without Rin. She stared at the excited smile on her friends face and sighed. But she couldn't refuse and crush Kagome's happiness. After all, she was merely doing it for her.

"...I...guess I could take a break..." Rin muttered uncertainly. Kagome stared, recognizing the tone in Rin's voice.

"...go! I'll take care of the Shop. You go eat, sleep, whatever. I assure you that I'll do much better this time!" Kagome persisted. Rin groaned. Kagome had better hope she'd do better this time...otherwise, they were both dead!

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Tokyo, Japan
July 22, 2006

Rin growled as she was thrown into her room, and then locked in from the outside. She quickly turned around and started banging at the door. "You bastard! Let me out! Why do you insist on keeping me here? And I thought bedroom doors were supposed to lock on the OTHER side!" Rin yelled with a sharp voice. She stopped for a few moments, sighing in defeat as she realized she would get no answer, no matter how many times she would scream. She looked down at her clothes and glared. His little henchment had done a decent job in ripping them apart...

She turned around and walked to her closet door, taking out a pair of pajamas, putting them on as she leapt into her bed and snuggled into the sheets. These were the only good things that ever came out of this stupid marriage. Her bed and her pajamas. It wasn't like she left her room often, only to go to work or school. Other then that, she was either locked in here by him, or she just didn't come out. She looked up in surprise when the door opened up. She scowled when he walked in though.

"So, how many more times are you going to attempt your futile plans?"

She huffed and hid her face into her pillow, praying that he would just go away and leave her alone. It was bad enough that he stopped her, but to mock her afterwards on her constant failures? How much crueler could he get! She grumbled a string of curses meant for him, although they were all muffled by the pillow against her head. She waited for a response for mere moments before looking up, wondering if he had left.

Nope.

He was still standing there, glaring down at her with a burning hatred like always. She sighed and pulled the covers over her head. "Go away, I don't have the stomach to look at you right now. I may throw up if I see your face again." Rin muttered. He growled slightly at her comment, closing the door behind him.

"Rin, you will not speak to me in such a manner, is that understood, human?"

She growled to herself. There, he did it again. Always with the human crap. She turned around and glared at him. "You think just because I'm human that gives you a right to treat me the way you do? You think it gives you the right to think that all of us are the same? That we're all weak? Well, what if I said demons were barbarians? What if I said that any human or hanyou was better than you?" Rin challeneged. It was when she felt the sudden sharp sting on her cheek that she stopped. She quickly covered the now red pulsing flesh with her hand delicately as it burned, glaring at him as he glared back with red eyes. She had pushed him over the edge. But right now, she didn't care.

"Vile woman, you will learn to keep your mouth shut. Because it may be that which shall end your life sooner than you had hoped." He ground out, turning around and slamming the door behind him, locking it from outside once more. Rin glared. She then took a deep shaky breath. Although she had acted it well, the slap he gave her did indeed hurt. She knew he put more force into it than needed, and that's what really stung. She truly was a fool, and now she was in a hole that she couldn't pull herself out of...

She layed down and pulled the covers over her head as she silently began to weep once more.

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Tokyo, Japan
May 21, 2002

Rin sighed softly as she layed down in her bed, snuggling into the soft sheets. How she loved her bed; it always meant as a break for her. Sleep was her only way out of her life, but even then she knew it wouldn't last forever. She rolled over, unable to sleep. Great, just great. She couldn't get to sleep! She wanted to so badly too. Kagome would freak out if she found out that she had sent Rin home and she wasn't even resting.

Rin sat up. If she couldn't get to sleep, then she would write something to make her fall asleep! Yes, that was a perfect plan. Rin opened her side drawer and pulled out a pad of paper and a pencil. Now then...what to write...what to write. Rin blinked as some words began forming in her head. She quickly jotted them down on the paper, spending at least two minutes of thinking of the lines. When she was done, she looked at her handywork and read it aloud.

"Two souls combined, their heart as one
The love for each other, great.
The people stare, their love undone
As they fight each other within despair.
The lies come out, the truth revealed,
Their kindness was nothing but a lie.
They scream at each other, rip out their hearts
In attempt to flee from the pain.
But they can't escape from the truth.
And so, in the end, they fade away
Like a candle in the dark, they die..."

Rin blinked rapidly. It didn't ryhme, but she didn't care. It sounded like a good poem to her, and she wasn't going to get rid of it simply because it didn't ryhme. She sighed and ripped out the paper, pulling out a small diary as she folded the paper neatly, sticking it in between the pages so as to hide it from Kagome, knowing she would most likely start looking through it. She sighed and hid her diary away again, a blush coming across her cheeks as a picture fell from it. She picked it up and stared at it longingly. How she desired to be Kagome in that very instant of time...

It was a picture of her, Kagome, and two men at a park. Both of the men had silver hair, but one of them had small dog ears on the top of his head instead of the normal, or even close to normal, ears. He was shorter and more gruff looking than the other, who seemed to be the eldest. He, unlike the other, had two markings on his cheeks and a crescent moon on his forehead. He also had elvish looking ears, and he had one of his arms wrapped around Kagome's waist with a smirk, sitting on a fence behind her. Rin was sitting between them and the other male with a small smile, an ice cream cone in her hands and the other man was grinning triumphantly as he held a stuffed animal. Rin shook her head with a grin.

Sesshoumaru and InuYasha were always a sight to behold, especially if they were both together and not causing any trouble. She remembered that day perfectly, and it was the day she made her first crush in a long time...

Flashback

Rin sighed as she traveled through the carnival with her companions, Sesshoumaru and Kagome holding hands and looking at the couples rides as InuYasha kept challenging others to a fight. Rin shook her head and looked down at the ground, kicking it some. Truthfully, she didn't like being in large, overcrowded places. She was simply too shy for it, and she was, truthfully, not really having any fun right now. She looked up, sneaking a glance at Sesshoumaru and looked down again quickly as she saw him move his head in her direction. She looked around to distract herself from the loving couple, jealous of what they had, before her sights landed on a stuffed animal contest. She sighed. Oh well...there wasn't much to do anyway.

She wandered over and looked at the high pole. She had to hit the bell up THAT high? She wouldn't even be able to make it halfway! She looked over to the white, fluffy teddy bear that was holding a bright red heart. How she wanted it so...she looked up at the pole again and gave a great sigh, turning around in disappointment. She wandered away from the carnival some, finding no interest in it. What was the point? The only people having fun were Kagome, Sesshoumaru and InuYasha...

Rin's eyes widened. She had just left them! She just...

Rin quickly turned around, stepping on a stray branch as it swiftly moved through the slippery mud and caused her to fly up into the air and fall down into the mud. Her eyes widened and she looked down at herself, seeing mud sprayed everywhere, her bottom squishing against the liquid. She couldn't go back like this! They would laugh at her...and Kagome would tease her about it for the next ten years of her life. Rin felt utterly hopeless at that moment. She had no one to love her, she had no real friends besides Kagome, and she was practically alone in her life besides her brothers! And now this...

Rin lowered her head as it all hit her at once with such force, that she couldn't help but hug her muddy legs to her chest and start to weep, not caring if she was simply dirtying herself further. She felt her body jerking with her tears as she struggled for breath in between gasps. She felt someone touch her shoulder and flinched away from it, waiting for the scorn and the laughter. When it never came, she slowly looked up and jumped in surprise to see only Sesshoumaru staring back at her. She blinked and quickly wiped away her tears, looking at him in confusion. Where was Kagome? And InuYasha?

Sesshoumaru looked her over, causing Rin to blush before he stood up and held out his hand to her. Rin stared at his hand, frightened that he would leave if she went to grab it, but did so regardless. Her stomach fluttered as he grasped her hand tightly and pulled her up out of the mud. She looked down in shame, knowing that he thought she was pathetic now, crying over falling in the mud...

"Are you okay, Rin?"

Her sight snapped back up to him, looking him straight in the eyes, which was something she didn't normally do. She gulped and nodded slowly, feeling her legs grow weak as he smirked down at her.

"If that was so, then why do you cry?" He questioned her again. Rin's face fell and she looked away, too ashamed to tell her why she was crying. Then she really WOULD seem pathetic in his eyes. Sesshoumaru frowned when she turned away from him and mentally sighed, knowing he wouldn't get an answer out of the silent child. He had never heard her utter a word, although Kagome seemed to have no trouble communicating. Then again, the two were best friends.

She watched him reach behind his back and she gasped as he pulled out the white teddy bear she had desired back at the Strength Test. She looked up at him in wonder, thinking he was going to give it to Kagome and smiled. But when he gestured it to her, her face fell in surprise and she looked at the teddy, then back at him in confusion as she slowly took it from him. She held it to her chest tightly, her sight never wavering from him. It was then that he did the thing she never expected...

Sesshoumaru grabbed Rin's chin and lifted her face up, and immediately his lips came crashing down on hers in a heated kiss. Rin's eyes widened in utter shock, but they slowly started to close as she melted into it. Her emotions exploded as she began to cry again, Sesshoumaru growling softly as he wrapped his arms around her small waist, pulling her closer to his body. Rin moaned softly as she felt his body heat, as well as something else poking against her thigh, as she settled her hands on his shoulders. Sesshoumaru broke the kiss for a mere second before starting up another, sliding his tongue along her lower lip, reaching up and grasping one of her hands in his. Rin gasped in surprise and he immediately delved his tongue into her mouth, sliding it along her tongue and exploring her, tasting her very person as he felt the desire for more. He growled again and quickly pulled away, staring down at the now bright red Rin. He smirked and looked down at the gift he had given her and pulled away, staring at the now squished bear.

Rin blinked as he pulled away, her mind fuzzy from what had just happened as she followed his line of sight, looking down at the bear and then laughing. She looked up at Sesshoumaru again, only to see he wasn't there anymore. Rin blinked in confusion. Where had he gone? She looked around for him, and when she found no sight of him, she sighed and stood there. He would tell the others where she was...

End Flashback

Rin blushed as she touched the bottom of her lip. It was strange...he and Kagome were going out with each other at the time, still were in fact, and yet he had kissed her. And even worse off, Rin had felt not a shred of guilt at her returned affections towards Sesshoumaru. She had not felt guilty for having a fling with Kagome's boyfriend. Rin looked down at the picture and sighed happily, looking at the hand that was being held tenderly by Sesshoumaru's behind Kagome's back. She stared solemnly as the thought of her long-time friend entered her mind. She had to stop. After the carnival, Sesshoumaru had become more affectionate towards Rin, but Kagome never seemed to notice. They had even gone to the point where he began to come over her house at night...he had taken her innocence; had deflowered her. It was in that moment, and that moment alone she began to despise him. She had told him no...she had told him that she wished to wait until marriage, but she had allowed him to do it anyway. Perhaps he simply knew that they both wanted it, and wished to rid them of their selfish desire.

Rin sighed and blinked as she heard a knock on her door. She pondered on who it could be. Kagome was at the workplace, and Sesshoumaru didn't know she was home...did he? She got up and walked over to her door, forgetting to place the picture back in the book before unlocking it, not bothering to look and see who it was. She meeped as she was immediately bombarded by Sesshoumaru, feeling him lift her into the air and kick the door closed, locking it behind him as he quickly turned around and roughly placed her on the wall, growling viciously as he nuzzled her neck.

"Rin..."

She heard him whisper her name in her ear and immediately became aroused as she wrapped her arms around his neck, tucking her head away in the crook. They had to stop...for Kagome's sake...but...she just couldn't resist him...

Author's Note: Yayness! My new story...I really like how this one turned out. I'll still be continuing Father's Fangs, so don't worry about that. I'm just really yearning for a dark fic right now...and what better than this one? Anyway, if you have any questions about Father's Fangs or this one, simply ask in your reviews and I'll respond to them as soon as I can.

FIVE REVIEWS MINIMUM!

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Kishai