Disclaimer: I own nothing. All characters are property of J.K. Rowling although the story plot did come from some dark recess of my mind.

Monday. Death Eaters ambushed our campsite while most of the Order was out on a mission. Fifteen men and women on our side were captured.

Some are dead by now I'm sure, others thrown into cells much like mine, left waiting.

Waiting to be taken to Voldemort. Waiting to be tortured. Waiting for death.

I'm not sure who the others are, only thankful that Ron and Hermione were spared. Thankful that they aren't here to witness this madness, my madness.

Snape was captured too. He is with me, most of the time. The Death Eaters don't take kindly to traitors. He is one of their favorite 'guests.' I can only imagine why they haven't come for me yet. I can only wait.

I am so tired of waiting though.

Waiting for my final bow.

I laugh.

Tuesday. There are fewer screams today. That can only mean one thing.

Death.

I can taste it; it's so thick in the air. Tangible. Snape came back alive and appears not to have any life threatening injuries. I'm glad of that. He is my only companion in these long days. "Potter" he says, "When we make it out of here, I never want to see your face again."

He lies. I can tell.

We wont make it out of here. At least not alive.

I tell him so.

Wednesday. They didn't come for Snape at all today. Or for me. They must be on a mission.

Snape agrees with me.

He talks more today. I'm glad for it as the silence isn't so deafening. He assures me that I'm not mad. "Mad people," he tells me, "They don't question their sanity. It's only the sane that wonder if they are mad." I quite think he is right. But then again, maybe we are both mad.

This must be true. The madness. Why else would I want to go to Snape and hold him? Why else would I kiss him as he sleeps? I never behaved this way when I was sane.

If I was ever sane to begin with that is.

I hope so.

Thursday. Death Eaters still absent. I am hoping it will stay this way but I don't think my luck will hold. If it does we are likely to die of starvation soon anyhow.

Not much more appealing than an Avada Kedavra.

Severus agrees with me on this point as well but says that I must stop trying to touch him or he will "Rip my arms from my body and bludgeon me to death with them."

I know he is lying again.

After all, if he hated it so why did he kiss me back? I can still taste him in my mouth. He wasn't asleep.

I feel him watching me as well. He sits in this cell, across from me, his dark eyes never leave mine but to blink away tears he does not wish me to see. He can't hide them from me. There is nowhere to go.

The tears fall freely.

I wipe them away when he lets me. "I never used to be like this," he says.

He doesn't like to submit to his weaknesses. He is afraid of death.

I am afraid too but I don't tell him that. I need to be strong for him. And for me too.

For us.

Friday. Severus was taken to Voldemort today.

They returned him only after they beat him unconscious.

His breathing is shallow and unfamiliar. This time it is me that is crying.

I hold him against my chest to protect him. I tell him I wont let them hurt him anymore. "Severus," I say to him, "We can't let them win. We need to be strong." But I know in my heart that it is useless. We can't stop them. I've failed him.

I can't help the man I love.

Not anymore.

He doesn't wake for hours. The cells are quiet in the darkness, too quiet. His eyes flutter open and I hold him tighter. A groan escapes him and I smile.

He will live for tonight.

Saturday. We make love this morning, early. So very early. We do not want to get caught by the Death Eaters. He is tender and sweet. Gentle with me, treating me like the virgin I wish I were. He pushes into me and I tell him I love him. He tells me that I ought not to. "I am a bad man to love," he says. He is serious. So am I.

I tell him that I would not love a good man.

He smiles for the first time, then he kisses me and pulls out. Pushes in and it's bliss in this hell. How peculiar.

This time I am the one being held. He is crying again. He doesn't want me to see so I close my eyes.

The Death Eaters come and I am left waiting again.

Severus does not come back this night. And I know that he will not ever come back.

How do I know this?

I heard his screams. I heard his torture. I heard his death.

I hear nothing else.

I am alone.

Sunday. I am numb. The taste of death is gone along with the feeling of Severus' lips on mine.

I miss him.

The cell door opens.

"Avada Kedavra."