Heart and Mind

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

Summary: It was cold – bone-chilling cold – but she didn't mind it. She'd rather feel the biting cold than the stabbing pain in her chest. Katrina was back. Ichabbie!

The clapping of shoes on cold concrete was the only sound that could be heard apart from her measured breathing as Abbie ran across the dark streets. Her breath came in white puffs in the crisp November air and they were instantly swallowed up by the fog that settled on the town earlier that evening.

It was cold – bone-chilling cold – but she didn't mind it.

She'd rather feel the biting cold than the stabbing pain in her chest.

Katrina was back.

And she was happy about it because that was what Ichabod was working for for years. That was what they were all working for. And seeing the joy on the man's face when he first laid eyes on his wife in the flesh and blood for the first time in years filled her with warmth.

They succeeded.

But ice cold fear was quick to follow her sense of accomplishment as Katrina kept holding onto her husband.

Watching the embracing couple made her feel like an outsider while she knew that she had no reason to feel so. Ichabod belonged to her now.

Or did he?

They'd come such a long way in the past trying years and she thought that they ended up just where they'd been supposed to end up - together. It was a bliss in their war against evil; his arms capable of providing reprieve from all the horrible things they encountered.

But at the moment those arms were holding another woman - his wife.

Where did it leave her? she wondered, refusing to give in to her tears. She wasn't his wife to claim him. She knew, however, without a question, that she was holding a special place in his heart. God, she hadn't known the meaning of "to be treasured" until she met him. But was it enough now?

She hated the fact that she was doubting his feelings towards her and her heart did know - did trust - his feelings. But her mind was telling a completely other story.

She'd never been good at listening to her heart, she pondered as cold water splashed under her feet – it wasn't long before that puddle would be frozen. Now that the cold had cleared her mind somewhat, she began questioning her decision to turn her back on the reunited couple and leave. Although her heart was screaming at her to stay, her mind had already started inventing scenarios where Ichabod was letting her go.

She chuckled bitterly as she bent forward by an intersection, putting her hand on her knees.

"Stupid idiot," she straightened suddenly and, though the light hadn't turned green yet, she dashed across the road - there was no sane person out and about in this weather. The rest of the way home she was running as if she'd been chased, her mind scolding her for being such a cowardly fool earlier. Didn't she trust Ichabod enough to know whom he'd choose?

Out of breath, Abbie stopped in front of the house, bending forward and pressing her freezing hands together. When did her mind start being the voice of emotions? And where was her heart?

It was beating frantically against her ribcage as she straightened and noticed the warm glow in the windows. It was inviting as it promised her shelter from the chilly night. She felt her limbs gave into exhaustion as she made her way to the front door.

In spite of her newfound confidence, such intense relief swept through her when she finally entered the house that she trembled.

There he was, alone, wearing his favorite pajama bottoms and a long-sleeved t-shirt. He looked so at home... so relaxed as he was rummaging through the cupboard as if nothing peculiar had happened that day and when he turned with a jar of strawberry jam in hand and noticed her, he gave her an easy, affectionate smile. It melted her inside and at that moment, Abbie knew without a doubt that there was really nothing to be afraid of – Katrina might be back from the dead but she wasn't back in Ichabod's life, at least not in a way she used to be.

On wobbly legs, she made her way to the man and, without any words, she sneaked her arms around him and buried her face into the warm fabric of his t-shirt, welcoming the familiarity of his arms around her.

She inhaled deeply as warmth began to seep back into her still trembling body – it smelled like home… and both her heart and mind agreed on that.

THE END

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