Iris
"And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now"
Stella hands him her report. "See you tomorrow, Mac."
"Wait," he calls as she turns to leave. "Do you want to grab dinner with me?"
"I really don't think that's such a good idea."
"Why not? I'll pay."
Since he had kissed her, she hadn't been able to meet his eyes. And that had been three months ago. Peyton was no longer in his life. They hadn't brought it up at all. But she still felt like a fool in front of him. "Okay."
They walk to the diner across the street from the lab together and sit in a booth toward the back. After the waitress takes their orders, the detectives avoid looking at each other until Mac decides that they need to talk about it. "I want to know what happened to us."
"You know perfectly well what's wrong and why it is."
"But why?"
"I made a fool of myself and told you how I felt about you. And you obviously didn't return my feelings and broke my heart."
"Stel," Mac reaches across the table to touch her hand, but she pulls away. "It didn't happen like that."
"Yes, it did," she wipes away a tear threatening to fall, losing her patience with him.
"No, it didn't," he says gently. "As I recall, I did tell you that I love you. Am I right?"
She shrugs indifferently, looking down at her hands.
"I do love you, Stel."
"Obviously not. Peyton left you months ago, and you haven't brought it up since."
He searches for the right words. "We can't… get involved with each other. It wouldn't work out." Before the words are all out of his mouth, she is out the door.
"And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
'Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight"
Stella storms out of the break room, pushing Flack out of her way. "What's wrong with her?" he asks, entering and getting himself a cup of coffee.
"I just asked her to get me a cup of coffee, and she threw the mug at me," Danny says.
"She's been acting a little off for a while, hardly talks to Mac any more."
Lindsay enters, "Who?"
"Stella. Maybe you should talk to her since you're a girl and all."
"I don't know about that. She looked pretty upset when I just passed her."
"We could get Mac involved. But since they aren't really speaking, she might throw something at him too."
"Fine, I'll do it. But you two owe me," Lindsay gives in, standing up to go look for her friend. She finds Stella minutes later exiting the locker room. "Hey, I was wondering if you needed someone to talk to. Because I'm here if you need me."
"She looks at the younger woman for a moment. "I'm okay… well, maybe not. I really don't know."
"Does it have something to do with Mac?"
"How'd you know?"
"Danny and Flack said that you two aren't exactly speaking right now."
"I really don't know what to do with him," Stella shakes her head. "I'm ready to shoot him."
"Why don't we take our lunch break now and go somewhere private to talk?" Lindsay suggests.
"And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am"
"I took your advice and told him that I loved him shortly after he came back from London."
"What'd he say? Is that why Peyton didn't come back?"
"He told me he did love me, but it wouldn't work out between us. Peyton broke up with him a few weeks later because she wanted to stay in London," Stella explains.
"And now he wants to be with you?"
"No, we had dinner last night, and he still said we couldn't be together."
"Why not?"
"I left before he could say anything. I already feel like a fool in front of him."
"Stella, you need to find out why."
"But if he loves me too, why wouldn't it work out? He… he kissed me that night."
Lindsay shakes her head, "You have to talk with him and work it out."
"No, I can't talk to him. Not after leaving him last night."
"Danny and Flack will lock you in closet together if I asked them to. You'd have plenty of opportunity to talk then."
"Don't you dare, or I'll get you guys when I shoot Mac."
"Just trying to help you out."
"Maybe I just need to go away from here and get over him."
"Stel, you'll just make it worse. He'll be completely lost without you. Mac needs you in his life, whether he realizes it or not."
"If I ignore him long enough, do you think he'll come to his senses?" Stella smiles.
"You'll figure out some way to make him see that he loves you more than he knows."
"And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah, you bleed just to know you're alive"
Danny and Lindsay get up to dance shortly after Flack and Sheldon leave to look for single women. Mac and Stella now sit alone, looking anywhere but at each other.
"So…" Mac says slowly, "anything new?"
She doesn't even acknowledge that he said something to her.
"You can't ignore me forever."
"Why should I stop now?" she mutters.
"I get the feeling they set us up because we aren't exactly on speaking terms." Stella crosses her arms over her chest, keeping her mouth closed. She had already said too much, and it was his turn to do the talking. "Stel, I think we need to talk. And you can't run away this time."
"Whatever."
"You're my best friend, Stella. You're beautiful, smart, funny, witty, loving all at once. It's you that keeps me from going insane."
"So you do need me after all?" she snaps harshly, then tries to soften her voice. "I just want to know why, Mac."
"If we started dating, we could never go back to just friends. If we break up, I'd lose you for good, and there's no way I could make it without you. Plus, I'm technically your superior. This would just cause trouble at work."
"Look at Danny and Lindsay. They work together and have a relationship."
"But they're on the same level. People will think that I… that you get special privileges from me."
She finally looks up at him, "Mac, the whole team has been trying to get us together for years. They want us to be happy. I don't think they'll have a problem with it."
"But you deserve better than me. You're young and pretty and full of life. I'm old and gray and… not full of life," he argues, not seeing how she can love him.
"You're not old and gray, Mac. Anti-social, maybe. But I still love you anyway."
"I can't, Stel. I'll ruin the relationship, our friendship, everything we have together."
She places her hand over his, "Can you look in my eyes and honestly say that you don't want this?"
"And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am"
He slowly shakes his head, "I want this to work more than anything."
"We can make it happen, Mac," she leans across the table to kiss his cheek. "Why don't we ditch them and watch movies or something at my place?"
"Okay," he takes her hand.
Half an hour later they are in the elevator going up to her apartment. "You're awfully quiet," he smiles, wrapping his arm around her shoulders.
"Just thinking."
"About what?"
"You," she exits, him following.
"What about me?"
Stella smirks, "I can't tell you."
"Why not?"
"Because." She opens the door and walks in.
Mac grabs her, pinning her against the door. Slowly he presses his lips against hers, gently, letting her decide where to draw the line. When they finally pull apart, he whispers, "You aren't going anywhere until you tell me."
"I was thinking about how handsome you are."
"Oh." He backs away to let her free.
Surprisingly she doesn't move. Mac stares intently at her. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing. I was just thinking about your hair. I like it better when you have it down."
"Oh, I lost the coin toss with Sheldon over who got to go search in the dumpster. I put it up again after showering so I wouldn't have to mess with it," she reaches back to take it down.
"You don't have to do that for me."
"It doesn't matter. It's dry now anyway."
"Here, let me do it," he gently pulls the tie out, letting the curls fall into their natural places.
They stand still again, watching each other. He cups her cheek, kissing the other one. "I should get going and let you sleep. Do you want to… have dinner after work tomorrow?"
"That'd be nice."
"Okay. See you in the morning," he kisses her one last time before leaving.
"And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am"
Stella knocks on Mac's door before entering. "What happened to dinner?"
"I was going to tell you that you needed to go home and get ready, but you looked so involved in your tests."
"Maybe tomorrow night," she plops down into a chair.
"It's only eight-thirty; we can still go."
"This isn't exactly how I pictured our first date."
"Fine, let me take you to the diner across the street. We'll hold off on our date until Friday when you're off so you'll have all day to prepare."
She sighs, "As long as I pay for tonight."
Knowing that she wasn't going to give in, he reluctantly agrees, planning to pay later anyway. "I'm starving. Hurry up."
She rolls her eyes, "It's your fault we didn't have dinner tonight."
Iris
As they wait for their food, they talk about work and Danny and Lindsay. "I told Lindsay I'd kill her if she tried to set us up. There's got to be some way to get her back."
"Am I really that bad, Stel?"
She smiles at him, "Yes, you are. But I love you anyway." Their food comes as she suggests putting them on dumpster duty for a couple months.
"I'm not getting involved in your revenge," he frowns as she steals a couple of his fries but doesn't say anything.
She stays quiet for a while, finishing up her salad. "So where are we going Friday?"
"You'll find out when we get there."
She takes a few more fries, "That's not very helpful."
"Stop stealing my food, Stella," he grabs her wrist as she reaches across the table again.
"I'm paying for it."
"Then I'll pay."
"You're being difficult," she takes her hand away. "Since you already told me how to wear my hair, what should I wear on our date?'
He shrugs, "Whatever. But I do like to see you in a dress."
"Okay. But you can't wear a tie."
"Stel," he begins.
"Mac."
"Fine," he gives in.
"And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am"
Mac walks Stella to her apartment, "I guess I'll see you tomorrow."
She turns back to him, "Come in, Mac."
"I can't keep you up late," he shakes his head.
"I insist," she takes his hand. "Besides, I slept in this morning."
"Alright," he follows her in.
"You want some wine?"
"Sure, but not a lot. I still have to drive home."
She pours two glasses and leads him into the living room. "I enjoyed dinner tonight. Thanks."
"It was nothing. Well… it wasn't nothing. It was the start of us," he sits on one end of the couch.
"I know what you meant," Stella slips her shoes off before curling up next to him, head resting on his shoulder.
"Stel, I have to apologize for being a jerk earlier. I guess I just wasn't willing to admit that had fallen in love with my best friend."
"Everything's okay now."
"I know. But I put you through a lot that you shouldn't have had to go through."
"I'm not mad at you any more, Mac."
They sit silently, enjoying each other's company. He kisses the top of her head, "I really should get going."
She doesn't respond or show any sign that she head him.
"Stel?" Again she is still. He moves slightly so he can see her face. She is sound asleep. Mac sighs, not sure whether he should carry her to her bed and leave or stay here on the couch with her and not risk waking her.
Eventually he decides to let her be and stay where he is, although it wasn't too comfortable for him. "Night, Stel," he whispers, closing his eyes.
Iris
Stella slowly opens her eyes and wonders why she isn't in her bed. As she tries to sit up, she becomes aware of something, or rather someone, under her.
Mac feels movement around him and wakes up. He finds Stella looking at him. "I swear nothing happened. I didn't touch you."
She blinks after a few seconds, "What?"
"We didn't do anything. I didn't try to do anything to you."
"Mac, I know we didn't. And I'm sure you were a gentleman. I'm sorry I fell asleep on you."
"No harm done," he stands, stretching. "Am I reading that clock right?"
"We're late. I'm so sorry."
"Don't worry about it. The most trouble we'll be in is all the rumors that will start."
"You should probably go home and shower. I'll see you at work."
He nods, "I'll put a stop to all the gossip when I get there. Don't worry about it."
"It's okay, Mac. I love you," Stella smiles, closing her bedroom door behind her.
Iris
"Where's Mac?" Danny asks as Stella walks into the lab.
"What makes you think I know where he is?"
"Stel, you don't have to hide it from us," Lindsay says.
"Mac and I didn't… nothing happened. We just kind of fell asleep on the couch," she puts an end to their conversation and begins helping them process.
Fifteen minutes later Mac walks in. "Everything okay?" he says, more to Stella than the other two.
"Why are you so late?"
"It's personal."
"So you and Stella just happen to be late on the same day?"
"We aren't sleeping together. Stella, can I see you in my office?" She follows Mac into his office and sits in his chair. "What do we do?"
She shrugs, "It'll die down eventually. Besides, the rumors are bound to come true sometime."
"Sure?"
"I hope they do."
He frowns, "What? You hope that's what you want to do?"
"No, I hope they come true. And, yes, let's just ignore them."
"Okay," he agrees. "How soon do you plan to make them true?"
"Who knows," she shrugs. "Dinner at my place tonight? I'll even cook."
"See you at seven," Mac looks around before giving her a quick kiss, leaving her to reflect on how lucky she was.
"I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am"
A/N: I've been meaning to update forever and just haven't gotten around to it. Hopefully I'll start updating more regularly. I've got another two stories typed, one twelve chapters and the other five. Then I've got another one chapter one written and a fifteen chapter one also done. Soccer's almost over but baseball starts soon so I'll still have typing time. This week's kind of busy so I might not update for about a week. Hm... I can't believe there's only two weeks left. I really liked the fire one, although it destroyed her home, just because it was a Stella episode. I so wish she had stayed with Mac though. There's one song I found like right before the episode and I was saving it so I could write a story about the episode with it. I really didn't know what to write after seeing the episode. But I kind of have an idea now so I might use it soon. The song "Broken" by Lifehouse just reminds me of them for some reason. I've got lots of songs I want to use but can't quite figure out how. So... next story's about them being held hostage. Then Mac's investigating a case that links to Stella's father, but she doesn't want anything to do with it. The other one chapter thing is... I can't remember... about taking chances, hence why I used that song, and starting a relationship. Then the other long one is about Stella getting shot. She's obviously okay since that happens in chapter one and it lasts fourteen more chapters, but gets sad news. Can't tell you. But it ends up okay with a little help from a friend. Mac gets kind of emotional when he finds out why she was shot to begin with. I should go now. Hope you enjoyed it. Please review and I'll try to continue posting stories.