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He knew this was all coming, in the middle of senior year he knew. There was no way out of it. No one in his family would let him be what he was-is. He was a disgrace, and now he is their perfect son. But he knows, everyone knows what he truly is. His mother knows. His friends know. Most importantly-he still knows.
He married a girl who was flawless. The one that will turn heads on the street, the one with the long chestnut curls, the one with the clothes that form perfectly with every curve on her body, the one with illuminating skin—the one that's not for him.
She loved him more then words could say, but he couldn't look her in the eyes. He was afraid that if he did, she could see his past. She could see the blonde haired kid that he loved, the one with the deep brown eyes, the one who was athletic and strong, the one who made him feel whole and safe—the one that was for him.
"I love you" she sighed as she rests her head on Peter's chest. Stroking it with her flawless fingers that where on her flawless hands. She looks up at him—he turns away. "What's wrong?" she asks.
"Nothing." He smiles, but still won't look back at her, "Nothing at all" he assures her and he takes a long gulp out of the whisky that's in his glass. It burns on the way down. He needs that feeling though-that hot sensation he doesn't get anymore, the one that Jason used to provide him. The only way he could achieve this feeling was with the whisky—it had been his new habit since he began his freshmen year of college.
"Baby." She says, blue eyes still looking at him. "Please tell me. What's bothering you?" He looks around trying to find something that he can use as a diversion. There is nothing.
Romeo comes running through the door, his tongue sagging low out of his mouth. Good boy, Peter thinks to himself. Romeo jumps up onto the bed and roams around in circles and begins to sniff around. He suddenly settles and plops down, he wedges himself between them. It breaks the awkward silence, and his presence fills the awkward air.
Suddenly two ambitious figures appear running through the doors threshold. They run up and start to jump on the bed, the dog bolts up again and starts to playfully bark.
"Mooooooommmy" cried one child as she bounced up and down her mother's curly hair bouncing with her. "We made you a card"
Peter began to damn himself, it was her birthday. How could he forget? How could he remember January 16th, but completely blow off his own wife's birthday. But he didn't even have to ponder that. He knew the answer.
"I have a very special present for you" he improvised kissing her cheek. Isn't that what you're supposed to do? Flirt. "Tonight" he said. She smiles and knows what this means, but he knows what this means too.
"Let's keep this 'G' for now" she motions to the kids. There is nothing he would like more then that.
"Dadddddddy" yells the other child jumping onto Peter's stomach, and as if one of his organs is deflating, he musters out an "oooof" and the dog licks his face, as if asking are you okay. Peter reaches out one hand and pets the dog. He loves that dog.
"How about we go bake a cake for Mommy?" asks Peter finally getting into his role as a father and husband. He was always a good actor.
"Yeah!" yells the girl and just as quickly as she bolted in, she is now gone.
"We'll be back!" he says standing up, and he kisses his wife on the head. It feels wrong, and like it doesn't fit at all.
"Alright" she says smiling. She turns away feeling the dispassion and he knows he needs to get out of their quickly.
"Let's go Romeo" he calls to the dog that pricks up his ears at the call of his name and follows Peter out the door. When they get into the kitchen Peter locks eyes with the dog who is staring at him with his head cocked to one side. The dog knows, he knows that Romeo knows who he truly is. He's okay with that, it's good to have someone to talk to, and with those ears—they have to be a good listener.
And then for one solid moment as he stares into those eyes he thinks he can see some of Jason in that dog. The smallest tinge, and as if to agree and compliment his discovery Romeo lets out a thunderous bark. Peter reaches down and pets the dog's head.
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It isn't for another week that he finds the kid's card. It's tucked into the sock dresser where all the cards are kept. He looks at the front, there is a house, two tall people, two small people, and a white fence that holds it all in. It's his family-his life. It all had come true. All the things his dad had wanted from him: the dog, the trophy wife, the white picket fence, and the children. But he never felt more alone.
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