A/N; I decided to write something different this time so it might sound a bit funny. I hope you'll like it, though! I'm a bit unsure whether I should continue this so opinions would help a lot! Thank you to all the lovely people who took the time to read my other fics and review them. I really appreciate it! n__n
"I can't take it anymore. That person. The one who haunts my mind and refuses to go. Every morning, every day – all I hear is their voice, all I feel is their touch, all I see is them. And all I want is him. How can it be that he is all I think about? I can't take it anymore. Wanting something I cannot have. The desire that I feel, the need that comes to mind every time he is near is destroying me slowly. The pain in my heart hurts too much and everyday I am with him, my yearning grows far more than I could ever handle. I need to escape. This dream I have created in my mind; I must break away before it is too late. Break away from him. He will be my death one day; my poison. So before that day, I must extract the venom he has created in my veins, in my head and in my heart. Before it is too late."
Colours of pink, orange and dark crimson covered the sky. The birds had retreated back to their nests but the fireflies were just emerging. It was crisp and light and the air was scented with newly bloomed flowers. The castle basked in the warmth of the sun and the trees swayed with the light wind. The laughter of the children could be heard in the streets as they headed back home. It was truly beautiful, truly serene.
"Arthur?" Merlin called, his voice trembled with worry. "What's wrong? You called me all of a sudden." Merlin closed the doors behind him and stepped into Arthur's chamber. Merlin didn't take his eyes off the silhouette that sat on the window ledge. The sun was slowly dipping below the horizon, waiting for night to fall and the moon and stars to grace the sky; the faint light casting a glow on Arthur's face. Arthur's eyes were fixed on the scenery that lay before him. Right now, he didn't have the strength to look at him. At Merlin.
Arthur took a deep breath, getting ready to say what he had practised that day. "Merlin, I...I no longer require your services anymore. That is all." Arthur's hand waved in the air; a gesture for Merlin to leave – but he was fixed to his spot. Confusion and shock filled his whole face.
"No longer require my services? What does that mean? What are you saying?" nervous pants escaped from Merlin. There was no way he would believe it. Never.
"It means you're fired, get it?" Arthur responded, his voice fierce and ready to strike.
"Why...why so sudden? You never told anything to me before. I thought we were getting a long. Why now?" Merlin asked, his whole body shaking.
"It's because we're getting along that I need you to leave. We're getting...getting too close, Merlin. Now go." Arthur's voice was cold and demanding, not like before. He was speaking to Merlin as a servant, not a friend.
Merlin shook his head. "No! Why? Why are you firing me? What did I do? I have done nothing but serve you Arthur!" Disbelief filled Merlin's head at Arthur's words. There was no way. It couldn't be. Arthur didn't say anything. Instead, he let silence drift in the air and tried to fill his head with different thoughts. "Answer me Arthur! If you were to fire me, I have a right to know why!" Merlin shouted, eyes wide and face a light pink.
"Because!" Arthur yelled far louder than he would have expected. "Because...I...I can't face it anymore. I can't take it anymore. I need you to leave."
Merlin's face scrunched up with puzzlement. "Face what? What ever it is, we can face it together, Ar-"
"No, we can't!" Arthur turned his head to face Merlin and stopped when he realised what he had done. A bead of tear started to form near Merlin's eye, waiting to explode from its cage. "Merlin...I...Just. Just go now. That's an order." Merlin still didn't move. He didn't budge from his position. "So, instead of fighting whatever you can't face, you intend to run away from it instead? That's not like you, Arthur."
Arthur had lost patience with Merlin. He needed to leave. "Get out now Merlin! I've made my decision. You won't be able to change that. Just deal with it."
"At least tell me why. I want to know." a soft voice called.
Arthur didn't want to let go. He felt like he was drowning and Merlin was the one who was holding on to him, saving him – but he knew better, he knew what was real. Arthur just wanted to get out of this dream he had created. This...this facade. "You're my poison, Merlin." Arthur replied simply. Merlin could feel hurt and pain in those words.
"What? No! I am not your poison Arthur. I am anything but that. You should know that by now." Merlin's voice was gentle and flowed like the calm sea as he walked closer to Arthur.
Arthur scoffed. "No? Then if you're not my poison, what are you? What is this pain that grows in my heart, the ache that won't go away, the misery that flows through my veins? If it is not poison, then what is it?" Arthur asked, eyes still on the land that lay before him, the image that was just outside his window.
"It is you." Merlin's voice was far quieter, far more calm than before.
Arthur's head perked up in shock. "What?" Why would he cause himself pain? It made no sense.
A fake smile fell on Merlin's face as a single tear began to escape from its hold. "It is not me. It is you. Because you can't except your feelings, because you can't listen to what truly lies in your heart, pain and hurt have grown in its replacement. It is not poison, it is you. I am not your misery or ache. I am not your poison. I am your antidote, Arthur." Merlin whispered. Arthur didn't move, didn't twitch. He didn't respond. His eyes did not move from their position. Merlin realised it was his time to leave. He had said more than what was necessary. If Arthur truly wanted to let go, then Merlin would go. A soft creak flowed softly in the room and was followed by the gentle closing of the doors. Arthur breathed in the cold air and rested his forehead in his palms. Had he made a mistake? No, he couldn't have. He had made the right decision. This dream needed to end before he was sucked up in it completely. This venom needed to be extracted before it took control entirely. It was the right decision. Even if the pain still remained. Even if the ache had grown stronger. Even if...even if it meant losing Merlin. Yes, it was time to let go. Time to move on and escape this agony. This poison.