DISCLAIMER: I own myself and myself only.
A/N: This is set after Ballad [01.10] and was beta by Emily (lj user: etacanis) she is such an adorable and helpful girl!
Crystal
He'll break. Finn is sure he'll break.
That's why Finn breathes like this, slow and fearful. That's why he smiles like this, dim and shy. Because he's too tall and he's too strong, and too clumsy and too stupid to know what to do. But he has to give it another chance because things could get worse, so much worse, if he doesn't.
He closes his eyes, again. He tries to breathe calmly and moderately, to be unheard, unnoticed again. And he fails, again.
It's useless, he admits, because every breath he takes turns into whirlpools and tornadoes.
And so the air he lets out, that should be nothing, absolutely nothing more than wind, ends up destroying shields, towers and crystals.
He is not doing it on purpose. But it's his fault anyway.
After all, if there is something he learnt from a very young age, it's how to recognize when something can break easily.
And it isn't just about untouched porcelain tea sets his mother never got to use. Or some strange, abstract, supposedly artistic, sculpture his aunt sends them because her daughter is studying Fine Arts.
Those objects are just that. Objects. Replaceable, disposable.
Fragile, yes, but lifeless. They can break but they cannot die.
Kurt Hummel, however, is a living creatureand the most breakable thing Finn Hudson has ever met in his life.
The taller boy knew it right away. When he watched the kid's face and body clash against those lockers he saw it immediately.
'Fragile,' the imaginary words over his head told him 'Please, handle with care.'
That's why he never threw him in the school's dumpster or pushed him while he was walking by.
That's why he didn't even dare to throw a slushy at his face.
That's why whenever he sees a helmet he thinks about the boy and how important, how essential and obligatory it should be, to force him to wear one.
Because Kurt is too easy to break and too impossible to fix.
So when they boy sings to a non-existing audience about honesty and feelings and love, Finn lowers his head in defeat.
And when the song ends, Finn stares at him, trying to breathe as little as possible.
Kurt stands there, over the scenery. He stumbles but doesn't fall, as if stating 'No, I am not broken. I am not damaged'.
And then he stands firmly, his nose up like when he walks around the school's halls with an air of superiority, and his eyes try to yell 'World, I'm strong'.
Finally he stares at Finn and flashes him a sad, brittle smile, swearing 'I'm not crying'.
Finn watches it and nods, slowing standing up.
His few, counted, steps echo in the scenery and once the noise dies there is only silence left.
That's when Finn starts clapping because he is afraid of the silence and the words that Kurt could choose to break it.
"That was awesome, man," He congratulates awkwardly.
And even if while he's talking he walks towards Kurt, the two of them can feel the distance between them grow wider and wider.
"Yes, thank you," Kurt replies, panting a bit . "It seems that the song left me quite breathless, huh?" He adds, staring at the floor for a second and then laughing lightly.
"Yes," Finn agrees, seeing the lie, seeing the truth.
"Guess I'll see you tomorrow," The kid says quickly, grabbing his back pack and giving Finn one last smile before walking away.
"Kurt, wait!"
It's what Kurt expects but Finn doesn't say a word. Because Kurt didn't confess he loved Finn. He just sang a song like Mr. Shuester had told them to do.
And when the song ended he almost, almost fell but remained in his feet, so he is okay.
And then he looked proud of his performance, absolutely confident as always which only stands to reaffirm that there is nothing wrong with him.
And finally, just in case there is any doubt, he had smiled to Finn after that, which must mean he is happy.
So Finn can breathe calmly again because there is no ghost or sorrow hanging in the air.
And he can walk away, without worrying over Kurt's non-existing shattered pieces lying on the floor, because they don't exist and they certainly don't shine like crystal, ready and willing to be broken by Finn again and again.
FIN