Chapter 1

Clarke had once had a dream about stars when she was very young. She had dreamed that far away in galaxies that no human eye could ever look upon there were stars that danced. The stars had banquets and parties and they danced without ceasing. In her dream all of the stars had been wearing beautiful dresses and suits, woven from the stardust floating through the cosmos. There was music in her dream, though she never could recall what it sounded like. When she had woken she had cried. Her parents had tried to calm her, but she had cried for hours. When she looked out the window of her room the stars were so beautiful, but they didn't dance.

The stars were very bright that night. Clarke watched them intently, as if worried they would fade away before her eyes. She remembered what they looked like in space. She remembered it all. She ran a hand through her hair, wondering if she would ever see space again. She missed it, in a way she hadn't thought she would. Maddy peeked her head out of the tent and coughed lightly.

"Are you coming to bed?"

"Soon."

"Will you tell me a story? A new one?" Clarke looked back at Maddy and laughed a little.

"Aren't you a little old for stories now?"

"Never."

"What do you want to hear a story about?" Maddy glanced back at the sleeping figure in their tent. Bellamy had been staying with them since Echo had left.

"Tell me a story about Bellamy. Did you know him on the Ark?" Clarke's heart clenched in her chest. Clarke beckoned Maddy out of the tent and Maddy settled into her side comfortably. She leaned her head on Clarkes shoulder and closed her eyes.

"I didn't know him very well on the Ark. I had met him a few times, there weren't many people on the Ark, but I didn't know him. He seemed…" She trailed off, lost in her memories. How had he seemed? "He had seemed private. I never saw him speak to people or smile. His shoulders were always hunched and he always walked quickly.

"I did talk with him once. I was helping my mom out in the infirmary and I was taking pills to a patient on bed rest in their quarters. I was running through the halls of the Ark and I ran head first into him. I was of course mortified and he was very badly bruised." Maddy snickered.

"I had knocked him down completely and I had knocked a box out of his hands. It had a bunch of books in it. I apologized probably a hundred times but he just brushed it off. He said it was no problem and he insisted it had been his fault. Then he walked away."

"I remember that." Clarke looked up. Bellamy was standing in the opening of their tent. His hair was curled from sleep and his eyes were red. Clarke smiled, or at least tried to. She kissed Maddy's head gently.

"All right Maddy time for sleep." Maddy got to her feet obediently and kissed Clarke's head.

"Good night Clarke, love you."

"Love you too." Maddy disappeared into the tent and silence fell over the night. Clarke looked up at the sky again, not sure what to say, if anything. Bellamy settled onto the ground next to her and sighed deeply. He seemed content with the silence, so she was too.

The silence was warm. She had sat with Bellamy in silence many times before, but it had been so long. She had forgotten what it felt like. She closed her eyes letting the memories wash over her. She couldn't help the tears that leaked from her eyes. She hadn't seen him in six years. Everyday of those six years she had called to him in the sky. She had waited for him so patiently, not knowing if he was dead or alive. She had waited for the others too, but she had only called out to one of them.

How could he be so calm? She remembered the man he had been so clearly. Fire and passion and raw emotion. Where was that man? The man who had told her that she was his head? The man who'd had so much heart. Now she felt as if the roles were reversed. Her heart was so raw and his was so closed.

"Clarke." She opened her eyes. Her face was wet and she wiped at her tears. She wasn't embarrassed. He had seen her cry before.

"It's been so long." Her voice cracked. She had imagined what she would say to him when she saw him again many times, but they all left her now. "I've been alone for so long. I never imagined-" She broke off as tears filled her eyes again. "I could have never imagined the way it feels to know you won't see another person for at least five years. When I found Maddy I was so desperate and so grateful. I don't think I would have made it without her." He didn't say anything for a while.

"I thought you were dead." The words chilled her. She had wondered many times during those six years if he was still alive. The thoughts had always left her paralyzed. She'd had to have hope he was alive or it would have been all for nothing.

"I thought you were dead and it was my fault. I couldn't forgive myself for years. I got over your death and now you're alive and I can't believe I just got over your death. How could I?" He turned towards her. She brought her eyes to his slowly. They shone with unshed tears. "How could I let myself move on?"

"It's good that you did." Her voice was weak. "It's natural to move on from death."

"But how could I?" His voice was haunted. He ran a hand through his hair, obviously very upset. "How could I let myself forget you?" His words stung. She thought of how different their years had been. She had thought of him everyday, perhaps every hour. He had moved on and let her become a distant memory. A dead friend of the past. She had meant no more than Jasper or Finn to him. She swallowed, her throat incredibly dry. Then she thought of Wells. He was dead too. She hardly ever thought about him anymore. The pain has lessened and she could think fondly of him. It was natural.

"You thought I was dead. It is only natural you moved on. I hope you could think fondly of me." She had meant her words to be light, but she could see they brought him pain.

"I could only think of your death. How horrible it must have been, and how I wasn't there for you." He choked up. "I tried for so long to think of you fondly, but it only brought me pain."

Clarke hadn't realized she was crying until he finished.

"I talked to you on the radio everyday. I told you about everything that was going on and I asked how things were on the ring. I told you about Maddy and about the earth and," a sob caught in her throat, " I always told you that leaving me was not your fault. I wanted you to be happy. I never wanted you to be in pain." Her words dissolved into sobs and she wiped her tears away as best as she could. "I just wanted you to find happiness and love and friendship. I wanted you to find peace." Her sniffling filled the silence.

"I couldn't." His voice broke. "You weren't there." The silence grew, but it was no longer filled with unspoken words.

Clarke must have fallen asleep at some point after that because the next thing she knew she was waking up beside Maddy. She sat up quickly afraid Bellamy had left in the night, but he was asleep on the floor, breathing softly. Maddy shifted in her sleep, but didn't wake. When she looked back at Bellamy his eyes were open. She got up quietly and slipped on her boots.

"Come on." She breathed softly, and he followed her out of the tent. Outside nothing moved. Light bled from the east but nothing else moved. Nothing else so much as breathed. They walked through the morning air, silent as before.

"Your hair is long." Clarke finally said. His hand moved to his neck self-consciously.

"I haven't looked in a mirror in a while."

"Do you want me to cut it?" He scratched his neck. Finally he nodded. After their walk they went back to the tent and found Maddy awake and drawing.

"Good morning! Bellamy look at this!" Maddy jumped up from her bed excitedly and produced a dagger from her bag. "Octavia gave this to me at training this morning! Isn't it beautiful? She made it herself." Bellamy took it in his hands and turned it over a few times.

"It's perfectly balanced."

"I know! It's amazing." Maddy took it back from him and babbled on for a few minutes about training with Octavia. Clarke grabbed a bowl from the ground and went outside to fill it with water. When she came back to the tent Bellamy and Maddy were laughing at something and Clarke couldn't help the smile that came over her face. It was so good to hear laughter again. To hear him laugh again.

"I can cut your hair now if you want."

"That'd be fine." He sat down on the bed and she climbed on behind him.

"Maddy can you hand me the lavender?" Maddy grabbed some lavender from Clarke's bag and gave it to her. Clarke mixed it into the water and the carefully poured it over Bellamy's head. She rubbed the water and lavender into his scalp and then pulled a dagger from her belt. She started at the base of his neck and then moved towards his ears. As she cut it, his hair started to regain some of its light curls.

"Do you want to shave?" She asked. "There's some water left in the bowl of you do."

"Do you have a mirror?" Maddy provided a sliver of mirror helpfully. Bellamy took the knife from Clarke and began shaving.

"Ah. It's been a while." He said laughing. A cut on his cheek bled freely. Clarke laughed and handed him a cloth. Maddy sat down in front of Bellamy on the floor and looked up at him expectantly.

"Will you tell me a story?" Bellamy wiped his now clean shaven face dry.

"What do you want to hear about?"

"Tell me about you and Echo!" Clarke choked, but Bellamy only laughed.

"It's okay I don't mind." He rubbed a hand over his knee. "I barely talked to her for the first three years. I blamed her for… for a lot of things. But I realized that people change. If Clarke had always treated me like the stupid kid I was when we first landed on the ground I never would have been more. But she treated me like the person I could be and I changed. And that's what happened with me and Echo. I grew to respect her and I grew to love her as well." Maddy glanced at Clarke. Clarke couldn't bring herself to look at Maddy.

"You aren't very good at telling stories." Bellamy laughed.

"No, I suppose not."

"I'm going to go and see the other kids." Maddy said, moving to leave.

"What other kids?" Clarke asked, immediately defensive.

"I met some other kids at training. I'm just going to hang out with them." Clarke hugged Maddy quickly.

"Be careful."

"I will be, don't worry so much."

"Be back before dinner time."

"Alright. Bye Clarke." Maddy disappeared out of the tent with a smile on her face.

"How old is she?" Bellamy asked, when she left.

"We're not sure exactly. My guess is about thirteen or fourteen."

"Who was she? Before praimfaya." Clarke sat down on a box across from him.

"She was a nightblood, a hidden one. No one knew about her before praimfaya. She lived in a small village not far from Polis. Her family worked a farm and raised cows."

"Why did they hide her?"

"She's not sure, but my guess is they didn't want to lose their daughter to the brutality of the succession." Clarke's voice was bitter.

"The conclave."

"Yes. She was young and she was an only child." The mention of siblings seemed to distract Bellamy. He ran a hand through his still-wet hair.

"O is…"

"She's still your sister. She did what she had to, in order to keep her people alive."

"Wonkru." Bellamy's voice was laced with sarcasm.

"She bled for that unity."

"But what does it mean? What did she do to unite them?" His eyes were filled with pain.

"She did what she had to." Clarke repeated. She knew it wouldn't satiate him forever, but for now it would be enough.

"I just want the fighting to end." He looked at a point behind her, eyes distant. "I want peace. I thought when we came back -" He shook his head. "I thought when we came back we would live in peace. I thought we would rebuild. I thought we would find you with the people in the bunker living in a thriving community. But then the ship came and it changed everything." He took a deep breath. "There will never be peace." His voice was hard.

"Not if we don't... work for it." She had almost said fight. "I want peace as well. I want it so badly." Her voice broke. "Since we landed on the ground we've been fighting. The past six years were peaceful in a way, but I felt like I was fighting everyday. I was alone, caring for Maddy on my own. I want her to live in peace more than anything."

"So what do we do?" Bellamy looked to her and her heart warmed. Not everything had changed.

"Not everyone wants peace." He shook his head.

"So we fight?"

"If we have to. Echo will hopefully be able to provide us will vital information. I don't want the prisoners to be our enemies if we can help it. But if they don't want peace, then they will be my enemies."

"You have an idea." It wasn't a question. He could see it in the way her hands fidgeted and the way she was staring at the ground.

"I have the beginning of one."

"What?"

"A common enemy." He leaned his elbows on his knees.

"And what might that be?"

"Anything that we want." Bellamy sat back.

"You want to con them into being allies with us? What about when the threat disappears? What happens to our alliance then?"

"That will be the test."

"So what is this grand foe you're concocting?"

"You won't like it." He sighed heavily.

"Clarke just tell me."

"Disease."

"What disease?"

"Malaria." Bellamy shook his head.

"Clarke you want to start an outbreak of malaria? If anyone finds out, they'll kill us." She had thought he would say her. They would kill her. But he was with her, even when he didn't agree with her. "There has to be another way. Where will we even get the parasite? I doubt there are any mosquitoes around to keep it alive. And how will we spread it? Or contain it? How will we make sure that people we care about don't die?" She waited for him to calm down.

"We don't have to do this. We could wait and see what Diyoza does." He ran a hand through his hair, agitatedly.

"Give Echo time. If that doesn't work we can look at this malaria option again." She saw he was worried. He was worried about Echo and he was worried about the others. They didn't know where Raven or Murphy or Emori was. They could be dead for all they knew. His people were scattered and divided. They were his people now, his responsibility. She wondered that if it came down to it, who he would choose. Would he choose his partner, the girl he had led one-hundred scared kids with? Or would he choose them? She hoped he wouldn't be forced to choose, because she knew he would not choose her this time.

That night Clarke set up another cot for Bellamy to sleep on. He thanked her gratefully and fell asleep minutes after he laid down. She sat on her bed combing Maddy's knotted hair.

"Ow!" Maddy complained.

"Shh. You'll wake Bellamy." Maddy glanced at his sleeping form.

"He's taller than I had imagined. I always imagined him as a little shorter and a little more, I don't know, passionate. When he told the story about him and Echo last night I almost fell asleep." Clarke covered her laughter with her hand. "I was expecting some great love story! The story of two enemies become lovers!" Her animated hands fell to her sides.

"He's quiet and thoughtful. He's nice." Clarke reprimanded her.

"Nice and boring." Maddy said playfully. Clarke smacked the side of her head lightly.

"People change Maddy. He may be different, but he's still a good man."

"I thought you said there were no good guys?"

"Maybe just one." And Clarke meant it. Bellamy had always been a good guy even when he couldn't see it. He had been selfless and daring, and she could see that in him still. His heart was tender, even if it was covered in layers of scars.

"I think you're a good guy." Maddy said leaning back into Clarke lovingly.

"I'm not." And Clarke meant that too. She was a survivor. She was not good. Not the way that Bellamy was good.

"You are." Maddy insisted. "You are good." Clarke squeezed her hand.

"Time for bed now. You have training early tomorrow morning." Maddy nodded. Maddy drifted off to sleep easily, but Clarke couldn't sleep. She pulled on a cloak and flipped up the hood. She pulled a cloth mask over her face and went outside. Everything was silent. She walked through the ruined streets of polis and walked until she reached the other side. Then she began to run. She knew this land well. She must have run for a long time, but it didn't feel that way to her. Before too long she arrived at a house. It was ruined like many of the other things in this area, and the one thing that remained intact was the door oddly enough.

She passed by the house towards the river. The river was dark and she knew that it housed a number of dangers, but she wasn't here to see the river. She was here for something else. She kneeled by the bank of the river and stared at it. She couldn't help the smile that came to her face. She had been right.

By the bank of the river, a small green shoot pushed its way through the dirt. The earth was being reborn.

Please review! Let me know if you think Bellarke will happen in Season 5; I'm starting to think it won't ever happen.