Digimon with a Hint of Citrus
Zeroxy-Chan rises from the grave. "You may call me Grave, Beyond the Grave." cue awesome guitar music
Author's Happy Note: Just to let you know, this is quite possibly the most horrifying (readable) Digimon fanfic ever written. Or at least it will be. I have grown up since Digimon with a Side of Lemon Please! In fact, you should go read and review that story! Go ahead! It's completely horrible, but not nearly as gruesome as the story underneath this author's note. At least back then I had some level of restraint. Digimon, any- and everything related to it are not owned by me at all (thank God, Allah, and Buddha!). If you can't finish this story still please review it! I love reviews; they help me writing happy things. Now all the characters depicted in this story are 18 or older unless otherwise noted. Wow, this note is getting really big, time for the main event:
Digimon with a Slice of Citrus
By Zeroxy-Chan
loading Chapter 1
The Boy from the Digital World
A slight breeze ran down the great plains of the digital world. And in these plains was a small blue tent. You see, two of the destined that were digital were camping for a weekend during, um, spring break. Or maybe thanksgiving break, actually probably some Japanese holiday you don't know. And if you do know one, pick one. Ken and Takeru had been camping in the unnatural beauty of a world that didn't really exist like 3 days.
TK got up from the sleeping bag, wearing only his blue pajama bottoms. First he yawned and stretched out his slim, barely legal swimmer's body in the rising morning sun. He started doing some stretches until finally he was fully awake. He walked over to a nearby stream and waited for Gomamon. You know; Joe's Digimon.
While he was sitting on the bank he sensed something watching him from behind. Takeru, only wearing his kinda sexy pajama bottoms and nothing else (even to protect himself with), quickly rose to his bare feet. His whole body which had started to tense up quickly relaxed, "How're you doing Ken?"
"I'm doing just fine T.K., is he here yet? I'm starving." Ken smiled and sat down next to where the blonde had been sitting. Ken was wearing a bra as a top and skirt that was so short it was more like a strip of cloth, both of which were lavender.
"Ken, I can't believe you were a guy," TK muttered, confused about his feelings. Of course, TK's body wasn't confused and a part of it grew.
"Oh Takeru, you silly goose, I told you before I was trapped in a man's body." Ken replied, not confused anymore. She played with her double D boobs. Just then Gomamon came swimming up the body of water.
"Hey guys! It's me everyone's favorite-, what the shazbot are you doing!?" Ken smiled and blushed, at the same moment TK took his hand out from under his p-jay bottoms.
"Checking for cancer," She muttered as cutely as possible. The other two gave her looks of suspicion. "Um, tee hee," she added for extra kawaii-ness.
"Whatever," Gomamon muttered, "Do you two want breakfast?" They both nodded affirmative. The Digimon yelled, "MARCHING FISHES!" But instead of the fish appearing out of no where (so that Ken and TK could skin, prepare, and consume them) a portal appeared. It was glow-y and swirl-y and crap. Out of the portal popped a boy with spiky brown hair who appeared to be older than the two DigiDestined. He hit the ground, hard enough to lose consciousness. "Where are you, you fish bastards!?" Gomamon screamed.
"It appears that you power to summon creatures has caused this boy to enter the Digital World," Ken expositioned, she then put on her +3 fetish glasses on, "He looks somehow familiar…"
TK put the boy's head on his lap and willed him to awaken. Eventually the spiky hair-ed boy woke up. "Um, what's your name?" TK asked blushing slightly. The boy opened his eyes slowly and gazed at the blonde's face.
"My name is Akiyama, Ryo Akiyama.," he muttered.
Meanwhile, in the real world, Izumi clacked and clicked on his multiple keyboards. The many screens that filled his room all glowed with terrible things. Half showed that the Digital World was in terrible canon-destroying trouble. The other half was filled to the brim with naked woman being mutilated, real and anime.
"This is really bad," Izzy said to himself. He had developed a tendency to talk to himself since he didn't have any friends. His skin had taken to becoming a sickly chalk white colour. After MaloMyotismon had been defeated Izzy had decided to physically isolate himself form everyone else. He went outside of his room only to feed and defecate. Suddenly something on random monitor beeped. "I need to call Joe!"
Joe arrived only to almost die from suffocation when he went opened Izzy's door, "God, Izzy, your room smells like semen, feces, coconut suntan lotion, old people, and death."
"I'm all alone here," Izzy responded, not turning away from the big fat red warnings that flashed on his computer screens.
"Wait, what about Tentomon?" Joe asked. Suddenly, cables sprouted from the computer towers that covered the room like obelisks. They whirred, processing themselves to be ready for data input. The cables twirled around Joe, causing his clothes to rip away through sheer friction. Then a computer tower opened its port and sank itself closer and closer to Joe's crotch. "IZZY!"
There was a slight ooze of blood from where flesh met machine. Izzy screamed at the top of his lungs: "This will be our secret experiment, test subject 2. Tell no one!" Joe screamed in agony. "The world is in not ready for science such as this…"
Somewhere else less sickening and pathetic in the real world Ryo was eating cake. It was hours later after he had appeared out of the portal. He, TK, Ken, and Davis had all met up to have some awesome cake.
"So you're saying that you were in a part of the Digital World and then you were in another?" Ken asked, being useless and stating the obvious. To make up for it she took a long deep suck out of her straw. It made the milkshake pour all over her lips like the mystery fluid Japanese porn stars have all over them.
"Yes that's exactly what I said," Ryo acknowledged. "It's been so long since I've had real food that tasted like what it looks like," He took another big bite out of the cake and smiled.
"Wow, you must have be pretty tough to last that long in there!" Takeru said, but then he noticed that Daisuke was sad, "What's wrong Davis?"
"Well, you see Kairi lost a bet with her brother," Davis said, so extremely angry because he hadn't getting any for a week or so.
"Oh Davis, you look tense, why don't I give you a massage?" Ken offered. She put her arm onto Daisuke's shoulder. They walked away, arm in arm.
"Happy Ending?" Davis asked, as they walked to the nearest love hotel.
"Happy Ending," Ken confirmed. Somebody needed to comfort the leader of the 02 DigiDestined while his poo-tang was serving out the terms of the bet she lost.
"Kairi, get me a beer," Tai said simply, resting his feet onto the coffee table. He clicked the TV on. "Kairi!"
"Coming big brother," Hikari said, walking into the room, with nothing but a bikini bottom. A yellow poke-a-dotted bikini, which she wore for the first time today, "Fuck yeah, product placement," Kari winked. She carried the beer bottle inside the cleavage of her bosom. She bowed low and muttered, "It's ready for you master,"
"Damn straight," Tai agreed grabbing the beer from his sister's breasts.
"You know, when I said 'I'll be your slave' it had a sexual connotation to it," Kari complained, her eyes wet with open tear ducts.
"Kairi, listen, I'm your brother," Tai looked his sister in the eye, his alcohol-laced breath affecting her nostrils, "It's going to take at least 12 of these before I fuck you, ok?"
"Yes onii-sama," Kari said, bringing the whole case of beer into the den. She sat on the couch, playing with her nipples and waited. Waited until the wonderful time when the fire-headed leader of the digi-destined would be hers and hers alone. Her brother soon finished off all the beers in the house.
"Kairi, I need more beer," Tai gestured.
"You know I don't know why everybody keeps calling me that, my name is actually Kari-" Hikari started. She didn't finish because she was pimp-slapped. So hard in fact, that it drew blood.
"Don't talk," Tai commanded, barely aware of where he was, "Beer me,"
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