This is the first time I write a fic about Sakura. She is definitely not my favourite character, but with time I can say she made her way into a good opinion from me... she did become strong after the annoying little girl she was when Team 7 was formed. That's why I thought of this when I heard the song.
This song is not originally in english so I had to translate... if you think it's not a good song, perhaps it's because part of it's poetry and impact was lost in translation. But I really did my best. I hope it's still understandable...
Also, this is the first fic of my series about the kunoichis of Naruto... next might be about one of these: Ino, Temari, Kureani or Anko, because I have already chosen their theme songs. (don't worry, not all of them will need translation hehe)
Thank you for reading, hope you enjoy.
*
Most of the times, Sakura felt like she was a strong and fast on the way to be a powerful kunoichi, a true woman, a flower ready to bloom.
But there were times in which she would doubt that. That she would look to the picture by her nightstand and the memories of those old days would strike her with huge intensity, making her wonder if she still was the one standing behind.
[Maybe I'm still a little girl
Waiting for the school bus, alone
Tired with my white socks]
A couple of years had gone by since Naruto had left to train with Jiraiya, still not back. A couple of years since Sasuke had left to gain power from Orochimaru, still not back. They were certainly becoming stronger. But was she?
Godaime seemed to take great pride in her and so did Shizune, however, there were nights in which she looked at that picture and couldn't help but wonder if that was true. If she deserved to be trusted by Tsunade-sama, if she deserved to be trusted by Naruto who had left with the promise that they would both become stronger to bring their friend back.
And then, Sakura would hide her head beneath the pillow and would feel ashamed of asking herself if Sasuke was worthy of saving. Although she had claimed to still love him after all those years, deep into her chest she was so disappointed with Sasuke. He had been her crush during her entire childhood, her great love, but now… but now she wondered if he really was that great, if he deserved all the effort they were all making.
Those times she would grasp her pink hair. She knew Naruto would be mad if he knew what she was thinking, and she would feel a horrible person, and yet… and yet the thought that maybe Sasuke was nothing more than an illusion wouldn't leave her mind. The thought that maybe it was time to forget that illusion and live fully to herself kept tugging her mind.
[Whispering prayers at the corner, for being a bad girl
Maybe the prince became 'a jerk'
Who is always a pain in the ass
Maybe life is to not dream]
Although Sakura made a pretty good job at hiding it behind her destructive fists and sharp chakra control, she felt very little in the middle of everything.
She sadly remembered when she considered herself a grown kunoichi. It was even ironic that now that she was older she considered herself so young and so inexperienced, at least at some things. Her records certainly didn't have as many deaths or suffering or pain or difficult decisions as Sasuke's, Naruto's and Kakashi-sensei's. Even at the field of love… Nowadays, she, who had once claimed to love someone more than her life, couldn't say she knew what meant love, even though she had some idea of the pain it could bring to the heart.
Hiding her prays behind perseverance, Sakura asked the gods – any of them – to show her what some things meant, to allow her to really grow and become the stunning flower she knew she could be.
[I only ask of God a bit of cunning
For I'm a child and I don't know the truth
I'm a poet and haven't learnt how to love
I'm a poet and haven't learnt how to love]
Of course, Sakura knew the gods were just to busy to worry about a girl who could survive by herself and every time she found herself drowning into those self pity emotions, she would put her gloves on and launch herself into training.
At those times, Sakura would be the best at her missions and training, because those times she would remember that was exactly what Sasuke and Naruto were doing. Sasuke and Naruto were living their lives to reach their goals. Neither of her team mates was too worried about their limitations, because they were living to surpass them.
And Sakura knew they were right. While they both had dreams (or ambitions, in the raven's case), they were not loosing time actually dreaming them, they were turning them into reality.
She was a fifteen years old kunoichi, under the lesson of a Hokage. If she had free time to keep wondering so much, she probably should use that time to actually do something. Naruto would take a bit longer to return, Sakura would use that year to get as strong as him.
[Silliness is to not live the reality
And I still have an entire afternoon]
Everyday, when Sakura walks through Konoha, collecting gate reports, doing gate duty, taking messages for Godaime, she proudly carried the leaf head band.
Unquestionably, there were people more powerful than her. Certainly, Sasuke was nearer of achieving his ambition than of being brought back by them. Obviously, Naruto would be coming back with cheerful determination. And she wouldn't let them down. Any of them.
She would bloom into the grown woman she had to, but not because she wanted Sasuke to love her back or because she had promised to Naruto. She would because she wanted to.
Sakura guessed that even though she had been labelled as the weak part of Team 7, no one had to go through the pain of seeing her team shatter, no one had to go through the pain of hearing 'Thank you' and yet be left behind by the one you love. In the end, Sakura couldn't say she had stopped loving Sasuke, and few people had to go through the pain of those helpless realizations.
Sakura guessed she deserved being happy while she worked her way up. She guessed that being happy was the fastest way up. And no one would stop her.
Despite of her doubts, she was sure that those two years had changed her, had matured her. And in the end of the day, she could say she had enjoyed every second of it, even the doubts – specially the doubts, because they led her to realization moments like those.
[I walk through the streets, return a check
Change a plant of place
I drive my car, take my drinks
And I still have time to sing]
Who knew? Who knew that the small blossom of Team 7 would be the one to smirk in the face of a challenge in the end of the day? And who cared? Sakura certainly didn't. Actually, she could bet everything she had that people even liked this Sakura better. Not that people's judgement meant anything, anyway.
In two years Sakura had done what her two male team mates hadn't. She had surprised people, she had turned herself into a ninja more capable of changing than Sasuke and Naruto ever could.
Not to mention the huge number of guys lining up, begging for a chance with her.
A small smile and a light tone of red would tinge her cheeks every time someone pointed it out to her, not of embarrassment but of pure satisfaction. Shame. Bad, bad Sakura.
Her inner self yelling "Chandaroo!!!"
[I only ask of God a bit of cunning
For I'm a child and I don't know the truth
I'm a poet and haven't learnt how to love
I'm a poet and haven't learnt how to love
I walk through the streets, return a check
Change a plant of place
I drive my car, take my drinks
And I still have time to sing
I only ask of God a bit of cunning
For I'm a child and I don't know the truth
I'm a poet and haven't learnt how to love
I'm a poet and haven't learnt how to love]
Eventually, the pillow would hide her head again while she tried to surpass the shame of being enraptured by the same doubts again. After all, she was really just fifteen, she still had a lot learn and to grow…
[Maybe I'm still a little girl..]
'But I am growing up.'