This cannot be happening. Yet it is. We are stuck here. I cannot believe it. When Qui-Gon said the ship was broken, I didn't know he meant it really was broke. We were flying in space being chased by droid fighter ships. Obi-wan tried to tell him to give up, but Qui-Gon never gives in. We were headed back to Naboo when Shmi spotted the Trade Federation star ships. Anakin wanted to fight them as much as Qui-Gon did, but Jar Jar didn't approve. I didn't approve. No one listened. R2D2 just wanted to get to Naboo one way or the other. And C-3P0 was deactivated at the time. Now we are on a small barren planet, much like Tatooine, but there is nothing but animals, sand, trees, oasis's, and some wood, so it looks like some creatures may have lived here before. Who knows? Maybe some people still do. But whatever we do, I think there's a slim chance we'll get off. Our ship's communication devices were destroyed upon impact to this planet.
Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon, and Anakin have gone out searching for anything helpful, while Shmi, R2D2, C-3P0, and I have stayed behind to build a shelter. Jar Jar went searching for some food. We decided to build a two room place. One room for the girls, and the other for the guys. Theirs has to be bigger than ours considering there are four of them and two of us. Oh well. We'll survive.
"Padme? Is everything alright?" Shmi asked as we neared finishing.
"Um… yeah, I guess." I answered quietly.
Knowing there was something wrong and seeing how upset I was over it, Shmi said nothing more.
The day went by fairly quickly. Jar Jar returned with a dead animal carcass in his webbed hands. He had told us it was already dead when he found it. Qui-Gon took it and cooked it for us to eat. We had plenty of water in reach with an oasis nearby. When we had finished the "shelter" there were two rooms like planned. Each had somewhat sturdy walls and an area set aside for bathroom purposes. Everyone gathered in the guys room and we talked after dinner.
"We may never get off of this planet, you know." Qui-Gon answered to a question I obviously didn't hear when I was tuning out. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Obi-Wan glancing at him with a horrid look on his face, then at me. We couldn't stop staring at each other. When I had finally had enough, I got up and walked right out. Qui-Gon moved as if to get up, but Obi-Wan had motioned him to stay. As I left, Annie was looking worried and dreadfully tired. They all looked tired.
"Is something the matter?" Obi-Wan asked once we were far enough away from the hut for anyone else to hear
"Yes. In fact, there is." I spoke the words with hate in them. That was not what I wanted to say.
"Well? Are you going to tell me?" he asked impatiently.
"I want to, but in the laws of Naboo, I can't"
"Well, as Qui-Gon had said, the chances of anyone finding us are very slim. You can tell me. I promise I will not tell a single soul." He said that like what I was about to say was a good thing. I knew there was nothing I could do to get out of this. I bet he is about twice as strong and fast as me.
"Okay." I signed. "You are not going to believe me though." Or can I get out of it?
"I will try my best." Nope. Epic failure.
"I am Queen of the Naboo." Maybe I should have given hints first. I looked up. He didn't look that surprised except for his eyes. They looked slightly bigger.
"Okay. For some strange reason, I think I believe you. I mean you do look a tad bit like Queen Amidalla. And I can see that as a reason to be so tense. I honestly think I do take your word on it." That went better than planned.
"Okay but you promised not to tell anyone. Remember? No telling anyone. If I ever get up the courage to tell them - especially Annie- I will. At my own pace; on my own time. Got it?" maybe I was too mean.
"Of course. But now that I know this, what do I call you?" he asked with a hint of playfulness in his eyes.
"Just Padme. Not Padme Amidalla. Not Queen Amidalla. Not You're Highness. Nothing but Padme. Okay? I don't need more attention."
"Alright. Will do, Padme. Now. You seem tense still. Anything else you wanna get off of your chest?" was he trying to hit on me?
"Um. I don't think so. But if anything comes up, I'll let you know." I paused. "Anything you wanna get off your chest?" I quoted him.
"No. I just came out here so Qui-Gon didn't have to."
"Oh. Nice to know you thought about my feelings…" I said as playfully as he talked.
"You know that that is not what I meant." He sounded better. But not back to normal. As we walked inside, we noticed it was unusually quiet. Obi-Wan glanced at me while we walked through the "door".
"I hope they didn't kill each other." He said and chuckled quietly. I didn't say anything after that.
We walked to the guys' room and saw everyone sleeping. C-3P0 was deactivated as well as in the corner again. R2D2 was chirping quietly in his dreams. I noticed Annie was curled up in a ball on the floor next to a snoring Jar Jar. Obi-Wan and I gasped at the same time. We both noticed the same thing. Qui-Gon and Shmi were cuddling in the opposite corner from everyone else. Neither Obi-Wan nor I said a single word. We just backed out quietly and quickly. Once we were in the other room, Obi-Wan had found his voice.
"I cannot believe it." His voice sounded worried.
"Believe what? That Shmi and Qui-Gon may like each other? It's not like you can't tell they have liked one another ever sense they met. You cannot stop him from falling in love, you know. It's not possible. I know it is forbidden for you two, but love is an all-powerful thing. If they fall in love, they fall in love, and that's that." I sounded like a horrible counselor from a bad school.
"I know I cannot stop him, but I thought he knew better. I thought wrong." He sounded sad now.
"I know it's hard to believe, but I honestly think they love each other and are afraid to admit it to anyone let alone themselves. I mean, can you blame them? They both know it's wrong, but like I said, love is an all-powerful thing that half the time can't be stopped or controlled."
He sat down on the sandy ground and played with his fingers in the ground. He was now upset, not sad or angry. I walked over and laid my left hand atop his hair. I knew I was at a loss for words, and so was he. I knew there had to be something I could do. I just didn't know what yet. He finally spoke breaking the hard silence.
"It just feels like I should've expected this. But I didn't. My whole life has become lies."
"Lies? What do you mean?" That was all I could say. My voice sounded as cold and lifeless as his. He raised his voice.
"Lies. Lies and more lies. He was lying to me about never loving anyone this way. You for lying about your true identity. Annie lied to me about not missing his mother- everything has been a lie in my life. Am I really Obi-Wan Kenobi? Has Qui-Gon been lying about who I am? I don't know what the truth is anymore! Lies have taken over my entire life. I'm not sure they'll ever leave. I don't even …" he never finished his statement. His head began to fall between his knees. I think he began to sob. I knelt down beside him and gently cradled him in my arms. Yes, he was crying.
"Look. I don't know much about lies. Growing up where I did, no one ever lied. But I do know that Annie did that so he would look braver in front of the council. I lied because I had no choice. By law, the Queen has to have a loyal bodyguard. And I am sure that you are Obi-Wan. I have no doubts about that. And I do know that you are cared for by a lot of people. Not just here, but on Coruscant and Naboo. You are important and you entire life is not a lie. Just the present. You have to believe me." My voice had little life in it again.
He sighed. "I guess I do. What other choice do I have?" his voice was deader sounding than mine.
"That's the spirit!" as I said that, I stood up, grabbed him by the arms and pulled him up. He turned around so that we were facing each other and he leaned in and hugged me.
"Thanks. I really needed someone to talk to." He said with life back in his voice.
"Anything for you. Think of it as a pay back. You helped me, I helped you. Kind of like a circle." There was life in my voice, too. He then leaned down, kissed my cheek, and walked slowly to the shelter leaving me to my wondering mind in the middle of the night.