.
.
They are not ghosts, Ichigo. They are souls who have lost their hearts to despair.
.
one.
Snow falls on him like ash, wafting from the gray-dark sky.
Sasuke blinks his eyes and rolls over. He is lying in the middle of a concrete street; there is nothing around him but a vast gray expanse, papers and broken bottles littered around him. The last thing Sasuke remembers is being backed up against the wall, Itachi reaching for his eyes but instead poking him in the forehead. Then he remembers passing out.
With difficulty, Sasuke pushes himself upright, clutching his arm and grunting. He sees the white of his breath pushing out into the cold air and shivers, the remains of his shirt tattered and frayed at the waist. He looks around, rubbing his arms, wondering where the hell he is.
Something screams. Sasuke whirls around but he's slammed backwards. His sword goes flying. Claws dig into his skin and Sasuke throws his hand out, reaching for his sword.
The sound of something cutting, metal swiftly arcing through the air, and the thing screams, slumping over and rolling off of Sasuke's body. Sasuke looks up, wide-eyed and panting, and sees Itachi standing above him, a katana in his hand.
"Are you okay?" Itachi asks.
It takes Sasuke a moment to process: Itachi standing in front of him, forehead bandaged and his Akatsuki cloak in tatters. He's breathing hard and there are dark bruises under his eyes; he looks as if he's just clawed himself out from the earth, battle-weary and just barely able to stand.
"It is getting dark," Itachi says. He sheaths his sword quietly and helps Sasuke up. "We must find shelter quickly, before the demons come out."
"Demons?" Sasuke is too confused to protest. Itachi looks at him, quietly in the eye.
"Yes, little brother," Itachi says. "We have woken in the midst of hell."
xXx
.
They walk together silently, tramping through the snow-covered streets and neither one of them saying a word. Sasuke doesn't know why he's trusting Itachi now, when the whole of his body up until now had screamed to kill him and take revenge. Sasuke is tired and Itachi is the only one of them who seems to know what the hell is going on.
"I have searched for you for days," Itachi says. His voice sounds weary, broken. "I would hear your voice echoing in the street, or the sound of your laughter. I'd see visions of you as a child, running around the corner and disappearing into the dark. It was then I realized they were illusions, just the demons luring me inside."
"Genjutsu?" Sasuke asks.
"Perhaps," Itachi says. "But I have the strangest feeling; it seems to me that we have already died."
"What?" Sasuke looks up, sharply.
"I do not understand it either. But I am almost certain we killed each other in our last battle."
Sasuke stares. And stares. And wonders how the fuck Itachi has managed to make it this far when his grip on reality was just barely intact.
"Here," Itachi says, and he motions just in front of them. "Look."
And there, just beyond the clearing, Sasuke can see their bodies lying on the ground.
xXx
.
"What the fuck?" Sasuke says.
Sasuke jumps back, reeling at the site of his dead body flung against the crumbling walls of the old Uchiha monument. For a moment, Sasuke isn't sure it's him, but as he comes closer, he's gripped by the horrified knowledge that it is. It's Sasuke's body that's lying against the craggy rock, Sasuke's face that stares upwards; beside him, Itachi's body is also there, skin caked with blood and dead gray eyes staring sightlessly at the overcast sky.
"What is this?!" Sasuke says.
"I don't know," Itachi says. "I already told you."
"Fuck," Sasuke says. He slumps down, falling to his knees next to the two bodies. For a moment he wonders if they're kage bunshin or some sort of elaborate genjutsu, some twisted fuck playing with their minds.
Sasuke's sharingan spins, but he can't break out of it: there's no Tsukuyomi to break.
Beside him, Itachi also seems to be at a loss. He stands quietly, shaking slightly underneath his tattered cloak. The whole situation is too disconcerting for Sasuke to comprehend.
"I do not know if we are still in this world, or the next," Itachi says. "In any case, I am thankful to have found you."
xXx
.
The sound of sirens is all Sasuke hears now. Itachi pays no heed, instead quietly tending to the fire.
They have taken shelter in an abandoned building at the eastern periphery of the city. Sasuke had never seen buildings as tall as these before, and could only imagine how they looked before the apocalypse fell. As they walked, he craned his neck to look upwards at the broken skyscrapers looming above him; they drooped at the foundations, steel suspension rods looking as if they were about to snap. "This was a city," Itachi said, quietly. "I have seen cities such as this in my travels with the Akatsuki, but never in such disarray."
They make a makeshift fire out of old papers and a few dry sticks Itachi had collected along the way. He makes it the old fashioned way: by rubbing the two sticks together to cause friction. "We cannot manipulate chakra here," Itachi says. He glances up at Sasuke, frowning. "We cannot use our sharingan, either."
Now they sit at the fire, huddled together and listening to the sounds of demons screeching outside. There is movement all around them, and Sasuke swears he can see yellow eyes opening in the dark.
"Do not be afraid, little brother," Itachi says. "This is not the first night I've spent here. They are afraid of this place. They will not enter so long as we have the fire."
Sasuke bristles. "Who says I'm afraid?" Sasuke says. Itachi only smiles.
"Damn it!" Sasuke slams his fist against the ground. "Itachi, if you think this changes anything between us--"
"I know," Itachi says. He tosses another branch into the fire. "Sasuke. I have no desire to take your eyes. They are useless here, as are mine. I will fight you, however," Itachi says. "I do not wish this to get in the way of your revenge."
"Tch. How considerate," Sasuke says. "And I suppose you want me to wait until we're better situated, right?"
The blow that comes knocks Sasuke back. He pitches backward, knocking into the wall.
Sasuke looks up, grimacing, as Itachi stands over him, dark and terrible and silhouetted by moonlight. His eyes are red and his mouth is a twisted line.
"You are alive because of me," Itachi says. "Do not forget it."
There's a painful expression on his face, but before Sasuke can say anything Itachi turns away and closes the door.
xXx
.
two.
Outside, the wind moans. Sasuke peers into the dark and sees the vast outline of a skyscraper-sized demon floating just above them, tall and black with a hole at the center of its heart.
There is an uneasy truce. Itachi keeps his eyes trained on the horizen, his Akatsuki's cloak waving slightly with the wind, while Sasuke follows him, hand on the hilt of his sword and walking just two paces behind. As they walk Sasuke concentrates on the sound of their footsteps on loose gravel, and of the sound of the wind sighing through the trees.
Itachi doesn't speak much. Occasionally he'll nod toward Sasuke and they'll crouch low and watch the demons pass, ambling by almost peacefully in front of them. They do not attack. Rather, they tend to kill by accident, sucking up the souls of whatever hapless animal strays into its path. The smaller ones are more aggressive, but Sasuke's reflexes are sharp, and he neutralizes them with ease.
Sometimes, they see men in black kimonos; Sasuke and Itachi watch furtively, crouching in the shadows as they flash-step above them, swinging their swords and battling the beasts in the sky. "Shinigami," Itachi says. Sasuke glances back. "Death gods," Itachi says.
The demon screams, then shatters, its soul dissolving like so much ash. Itachi squints his eyes and looks upward, as if trying to see.
"It disappeared," Itachi says. "I wonder where they have gone?"
So far, the demons have ignored them, but there have been others - human souls, just like them - wandering the streets only to be chased and devoured, easy prey. Itachi and Sasuke crouch in the shadows, invisible, watching as the demons lumber by.
xXx
.
They return to the sites where their bodies have been. Sasuke circles once, then twice, before he notices the fine-linked chain snaking out from his body's chest. Crouching low, Sasuke pulls the chain up and gives it one firm tug, before he realizes it's connected; he glances down and notices for the first time the chain coming from his own chest, and the link where it had broken.
So this is the chain that linked my soul to my body, Sasuke thinks. It's a ridiculous thought, and likely more evidence that this is a strange genjutsu than anything else. Sasuke frowns.
"I think this is how we were attached," Sasuke says, and he shows Itachi the chain. "Maybe we really are dead."
"Perhaps." Itachi kneels and presses the broken ends of the chain from his own body to the chain links hanging out from his chest. They fit perfectly. "It is strange, little brother. In any other circumstance this would be a cause of some distress, or at the very least, confusion or puzzlement. Funny how we should take things in such stride."
"Hmph." Sasuke glares. "I still think this is a genjutsu," Sasuke says. He kicks his body disdainfully, kicking it at the shoulder.
It has been eight days since reuniting with Itachi, and Sasuke begins to itch uncomfortably at the thought. Since their reunion, Itachi has been unexpectedly docile, gentle and good-natured like the older brother of his youth. The thought makes him start to seethe.
There is a burning at his chest, and Sasuke looks down to see the almost invisible chain start to dissolve at the most distal link; the link sizzles, then breaks off, his chain shortened visibly. Sasuke stares at it, turning the chain over in his hand. He glances back at Itachi, who seems to have noticed it as well.
"Our time is growing short," Itachi says. "The link to my chain is fading, as well."
xXx
.
They walk silently now, pushing past the gray flat stones and the jagged rubble around them.
"Why did you kill them?" Sasuke says. Itachi seems tired; his shoulders visibly sag.
"I have killed a lot of people, Sasuke. You must be more specific."
"Kisama," Sasuke says. "You know who I mean."
Itachi stops. Sasuke comes up to him, hands clenching into fists.
"Were you just curious?" Sasuke asks. He pushes forward, invading Itachi's space. "Wanted to see if you could do it? Wanted to sacrifice everyone just to test your skill?"
"Why do you ask when you already know the truth?" Itachi says.
"Teme!" Sasuke's sword flashes, a perfect arc. Itachi dodges, once, twice, then catches the blade between his hands. Sasuke's eyes widen. Itachi throws his sword to the ground.
"Face it, little brother. You need me." Itachi's voice is cruel, hard. He stares at Sasuke with hardened eyes. "You would not survive without me. Be lucky that I am feeling charitable."
"If I am a waste of your time, why drag me along with you?" Sasuke says. Itachi's lips twist into a cruel smile.
"Because, little brother. If one is to be chased by a shark, it is often best to keep the slowest one with you."
xXx
.
That night, Sasuke has a dream.
He is a child again, catching fireflies in the back. The moon is out and there are tall grasses that tickle his ankles and the back of his calves. Sasuke is running, laughing. In front of him, Itachi is watching, a small smile on his face.
Sasuke wakes up in darkness. Above him, the ceiling is crumbling and there are strange night sounds filling the air. Across the room, his brother is sleeping, his back facing him and his body curled around his sword. Sasuke thinks of his dream and frowns.
"What is it?"
Sasuke turns and sees Itachi watching him, quietly.
"Nothing," Sasuke says. "I just had a dream."
Itachi nods and shifts closer. "You used to have nightmares when you were little," Itachi says. "You used to come into my room."
"Tch." Sasuke rolls his eyes, but the memory is still there. He remembers how he would wake up crying sometimes, and Itachi would sit on his bed, waiting patiently until Sasuke was no longer scared. It's only then that Sasuke realizes that Itachi is watching him with that same look on his face, the same worried expression he wore when Sasuke was just a child.
Then Itachi's head snaps up; his eyes harden. "Go to sleep, Sasuke," he says, and he turns away.
But Sasuke can't sleep. He stares out into the dark, silently tracing the shadows on the wall.
"You made mom cry once, do you remember?" Sasuke says. "You and dad had been fighting, and then you had left for a mission. You were gone for days."
"She was worried I would not come back," Itachi says. His voice sounds as if it's coming from far away. "She was worried I might die before father could apologize."
"Yeah," Sasuke says.
They lapse into silence. Sasuke remembers the fighting; his father shouting about duty and honor and Itachi just standing silently, not saying a word and staring at the ground. Sasuke had been in bed, tucked firmly under the covers, but the voices were so loud Sasuke couldn't help but peek through the door.
Across the room, Itachi sits heavily underneath an open window. There is a square of moonlight on the floor, but its light slants just above Itachi, who is sitting in shadow. Sasuke wonders if he is remembering as well.
"Did you hate me, Sasuke?" Itachi's voice is soft, much like it was when Sasuke was a child. Sasuke shakes his head.
"No," Sasuke says, and the answer surprises him. Itachi's eyes are sad.
xXx
.
three.
They're running; a demon has caught sight of them and is giving chase. "Sasuke!" Itachi says, but Sasuke is too late. The demon swipes and Sasuke slams into the ground; his shoulder wrenches with pain.
Swiftly, Itachi's katana arcs and slams into the demon's chest; it roars, then dissipates, its body disappearing into the air. Sasuke cries out as Itachi falls onto his knees next to him, pulling Sasuke up by the shoulder.
"Sasuke!" Itachi's face is pale. He shakes Sasuke, then clamps his hand around Sasuke's wound.
"It...hurts." Sasuke grits his teeth. There is a burning in the middle of his chest, and dimly Sasuke is aware of the chain being shortened by another link. Sasuke can feel Itachi trying to heal him, but it's no use.
"Damn it," Itachi says. Sasuke wheezes, blood bubbling up his mouth.
"Nii-san." The word is thick in Sasuke's mouth, but he's in too much pain to care. "Nii-san, I think....I think this proves that we're not dead."
"Forgive me," Itachi says. His hands dig into Sasuke's shoulder. "Sasuke, I--"
There's an explosion. Itachi grabs Sasuke by the arm and yanks him back; there's dust kicked up in the air and in the smoke Sasuke can just make out the broad-backed figure of a man in black robes, a large sword hanging by the man's side.
"We must leave," Itachi says. Itachi's face is pale.
xXx
.
Somehow, between the running and the gaping wound in his chest, Sasuke manages to keep from passing out. It's only until they're safe that Sasuke's eyes roll back, slumping against Itachi's shoulder.
Hours pass. Sasuke opens his eyes to see his brother kneeling over him, a worried look on his face.
"Are you all right?" Itachi asks.
Sasuke grunts, then sits up with difficulty - his wound wrenches open, and blood seeps through the dressings. Itachi frowns and gently eases Sasuke back down.
"I'm fine," Sasuke says. He moves too suddenly, and the pain rips through his chest. Sasuke winces, pressing a hand to his wound. "You saved me."
Itachi makes a sound, and Sasuke can't tell if Itachi is annoyed or relieved. Sasuke can't tell much about Itachi these days: reading him is like trying to predict hot and cold.
"You must rest, little brother," Itachi says, finally. "The wound will re-open if you don't."
Sasuke leans back, silently cursing their lack of chakra control. "I thought the point of keeping me around was so that you could escape," Sasuke says. "Saving me seems to be missing the point."
"Perhaps I enjoy the company."
"Tch." Sasuke rolls his eyes. Itachi smiles.
Sasuke picks at his bandages, which bunch up around the chain at his chest. He glances up at Itachi, frowning. He remembers their last moment of battle, and how Itachi had reached for his eyes.
"You weren't after my eyes, were you?" Sasuke says. Somehow, the air between them seems to thicken; Itachi hunches, pulling his cloak around his arms.
"I see you continue to cling to your illusions," Itachi says, quietly. "I have been after those eyes from the start."
"You lie," Sasuke says. Itachi stiffens, visibly. "Itachi. No matter what's going on between us, I deserve to know the truth."
"The truth?" Itachi gives a short, bitter laugh. "The truth, little brother, is that I am a killer and you had sought to avenge our clan. That is the only truth," Itachi says, and he stands, abruptly. "I grow tired of these questions, Sasuke," Itachi says. "Do not make the mistake of wasting my time."
And then Itachi leaves, his shadow passing over Sasuke as he disappears into the dark.
xXx
.
There is a memory, one long-buried and something which Sasuke struggled to forget.
Sasuke was a child, hiding barefoot in the grass. It was nighttime and the moon was out, and Sasuke was sure his brother was out there, coming back from one of his special missions from the Sand.
There was a sound, a whisper of a threat in the footfall behind him, and young Sasuke whirled around to come face to face with the porcelain mask, stark and gray and seemingly bodiless in the moonlight. The figure was hunched; there was blood on its hands.
Sasuke screamed. Suddenly the figure swooped over him, hands gripping Sasuke by the arms.
"Sasuke. It's me."
And in one swift movement, Itachi pulled off his mask.
xXx
.
Itachi had carried him home that night. His ANBU uniform was blood-stained and rough, and Sasuke could see the scratches on his brother's bare shoulders and the swirl of the ANBU tattoo on his arm. Sasuke clung to him, gripping him tight, while Itachi hitched him onto his back and trudged home, his mask clanging softly by his side.
Pieces of hair stuck to Itachi's forehead, and his face was smudged with dirt. He looked tired, so Sasuke hugged Itachi tight, pressing his little arms around Itachi's shoulders. The memory gnaws at the back of Sasuke's mind.
xXx
.
There is a sound, and Sasuke opens his eyes. He wakes to see Itachi hunched over the fire, turning over his sword in his hands.
"My katana," Itachi says. He looks up at Sasuke with darkened eyes. "It is breathing."
"What?" Sasuke pushes himself upright. More and more his brother's grip on sanity seems to be slipping; Itachi stares at his sword, running his fingers across the hilt.
"I am not sure, but it is as if something inside me is whispering to me. Calling out my name..."
"Shit." Sasuke pulls Itachi forward, pressing a hand to his forehead. "You're burning up," Sasuke says. He yanks Itachi's sword away from him and flings it on the ground.
"Zanpakutou..." Itachi's breathing is labored; he isn't making sense. Sasuke grabs him by the shoulders.
"Stop it," Sasuke says. He shakes him again. "Itachi! Swords don't talk!"
"Perhaps now is the time to kill me, little brother." Itachi's voice sounds distant, soft. "Perhaps now is the time you should try."
xXx
.
It is raining now, and Sasuke's cloak sticks heavily to his skin. Quietly he turns to face his brother, pushing the wet strands of hair out of his eyes.
The end that comes is quick: Sasuke is shocked at how easily the sword slices into him, skin tearing like a satchel of wine. There is something in Itachi's face, the merest flicker of pain, then a smile, and all Sasuke is aware of is the feel of blood, sticky and warm on his hands.
Itachi staggers, the weight of his body pushing him further into Sasuke's sword. His hand curls around Sasuke's, black-tipped fingers curling around the hilt, as Sasuke stands, mouth gaping and stunned, wondering if Itachi had thrown himself on the blade.
But it doesn't matter now; the sky opens, and the rain falls harder, stinging Sasuke's eyes and mixing with the blood on Sasuke's skin.
There is another memory now, pushing past the surface and shoving its way to the forefront of Sasuke's mind. Secret ANBU meetings; furtive whispers; the shame in his father's eyes...
"Itachi..." Sasuke sinks to his knees, the weight of his brother's body resting heavily on his shoulder. "Why?" Sasuke says. "I don't understand--"
Sasuke screams. There's pain, a tearing sensation at his chest, and Sasuke opens his eyes and sees the chain swinging and corroding into his skin like acid. "Itachi, why?"
He screams again, clutching at his chest. Suddenly he's haunted by the memory of Itachi's eyes.
The mask grips around him, liquid bone encasing Sasuke's face. Sasuke screams and sinks to his knees, the hole in his chest searing with pain.
"They are Konoha's demons," his father says, and he motions to the men in ANBU masks. His brother is one of them, and Sasuke watches with child-like pride.
Sasuke screams, he roars, his hollow's body tears and stretches, massive, his face covered by the demon's mask. Sasuke transforms, blood-hungry and hollow, the chain in his chest ripping and leaving a gaping hole.
Around him, men in black robes surround him, brandishing swords and leaping into the air. Shinigami. Sasuke knows now that the end is near.
Their zampakutou flash; Sasuke's body, like Itachi's, dissolves into mist in the air.
xXx
.
four.
In the Eastern Quarter of Soul Society, Sasuke walks with his cloak tightly around him, ignoring the whispers and the curious stares. There are few shinobi who make it into Soul Society; those that do are outcasts, souls whose chakra outdoes even the strongest shinigami reiatsu. "Monsters," people say. That Sasuke is a shinobi and a former hollow makes people even more afraid. But that is okay. Sasuke is used to it.
There are others like him, former hollow who congregate at the outskirts of the city. Their chakra is strong, and they moreso than other souls have the potential to become shinigami themselves. "You should try for the academy," one former hollow tells him, and Sasuke shakes his head. He has had enough of fighting for now.
xXx
.
Years pass, perhaps centuries. Sasuke isn't sure.
They say families rarely find each other; mothers search for daughters and husbands search for wives in vain. And so it is in Soul Society that souls form makeshift families instead, coming together in fragments to make a lopsided whole.
Sasuke spends the first few decades of his afterlife searching for his brother; then he amends that to anyone from his clan. But there is no one, just the sad ghosts of former hollow and a few scattered souls.
There is a war, but it ends as quickly as it comes. People line the streets while others peer through dirt-smudged windows, watching the parade of battle-weary shinigami finally coming home.
Sasuke is among the crowd, pulling his cloak and watching with hooded eyes. The shinigami trudge silently, robes tattered and zampakutou hanging by their sides.
It is growing dark above Soul Society, and in the gray-dark sky, Sasuke thinks he can hear the sound of crows.
"Sasuke," someone says, and Sasuke turns.
And Itachi stands, dark eyes red and clad in shinigami robes.
A/N: a few things for those not in the Bleach fandom:
(1) Souls who don't pass on to the other side (soul society) are at the risk of turning into "hollows", which are kind of like demons who devour the souls of others. Shinigami, or death gods, shepherd wayward souls to the other side.
(2) Shinigami have a special relationship with their sword, or "zampakutou," which is a manifestation of their soul. Itachi hearing his sword speaking to him is him communicating with his zampakutou for the first time.
(3) Any soul with enough chakra (or in the Bleach universe, reiatsu), can become a shinigami. Itachi had the capacity to become either a shinigami or a hollow.
(4) It's my personal head-canon that hollows who are "killed" by shinigami are just returned to their original state; so Sasuke basically just wakes up in the middle of Soul Society, de-hollowfied. lol :)