"Hey, Mamo-chan?" Usagi's voice rose above the heavy silence in the room, but didn't seem to break it. She shifted her legs beneath her and faced him on the sofa, hands folded in her lap. "Can I ask you a question?"
He looked up and nodded, his smile seeming to take the tension out of her shoulders for a moment.
"The girls think...," she trailed off and frowned, then seemed to shake herself and start over, "I was wondering, the ring you gave me?" His eyes fell to her hands, where the ring caught the afternoon sunlight for a moment, winking with the same golden hue that turned the dusty air in the apartment into golden sunbeams. "I love it so much... but... is it ... is it supposed to be an engagement ring or something?"
Usagi met his eyes, brows raised in curiosity. In typical Usagi fashion, her question was straightforward and unassuming. Just like the other time.
"Do you love me?" she'd asked all those nights ago, and the question took his breath away like a punch in the stomach.
And, just like that time, Mamoru found himself momentarily unable to give her his answer.
Instead, his eyes fell on the brooch that still nestled in the bow of her uniform, its unique garishness defeating the very purpose of a uniform. Not that it mattered. To Mamoru, Usagi always stood out from her peers - her movements and expressions, stature and hairstyle, even the way she carried herself - his eyes always sought and found her in crowds. Looking away was the more difficult part.
He'd seen her just a few days ago, on the sidewalk near Juuban High - part of a giggling gaggle of loud teenage joy - boys and girls mingling together and at least six conversations happening at once. Makoto was there, school satchel slung over her shoulder, but besides her and Usagi, no one else was familiar to Mamoru. Usagi was deep in conversation with a slightly taller kid, shaking her head vehemently and speaking with such passion Mamoru surmised the topic had to be either video games or desserts.
And in that startling moment - Usagi seemed so... real. So normal. So young. Like she could be any teenage girl, laughing with her mouth open and swinging her school bag from her finger, the biggest worry tomorrow's math test and who was gossiping about whom.
Normal teenage girls don't have as intimate a relationship with death and loss, fear and redemption.
As he watched, Usagi turned and waved at a small group who split off at the intersection, suddenly everything she'd endured - would still endure - was as clear as the sunlight glinting off both her brooch and the ring on her finger.
"Mamo-chan?" Usagi prompted, bringing him back to the present. Warm little hands wound their way around his arm, her cheek rested on his shoulder, and his throat closed up with the sheer violence of how much he needed her.
Because of course it was an engagement ring.
So selfish in his wanting, he'd almost proposed to her right in the airport, minutes before leaving her behind. Instead, he told himself it was enough that she'd had the ring and when he came back - when he came back, he'd ask her for real.
Hell, if propriety and logistics could be ignored he'd marry her immediately, their unfinished education and lack of income a pale deterrent when faced with another night alone.
But now she looked at him, so young, so unassuming, and he swallowed everything he wanted to say.
"It's just a ring," he said, finally, brushing his knuckles gently against her cheek. "A present."
Usagi's face broke into a genuine smile. "I love it so much," she said. She bit her lower lip for a moment, beaming at him. Then she buried her head against his shoulder, squeezing his arm with hers until his fingers tingled. "Thank you again. I never take it off."
He reached over and curled the fingers of his other hand around one of hers as the room descended into silence. He kept the book open in front of him, but his eyes remained unfocused on the page.