Captain Manuel Ashford stood poised and confident in the middle of the bridge on his Starship the U.S.S Half-Awake.
" Alright Crew, We'll be doing things a bit differently around here, so listen up, and listen up good because im not going to repeat myself." He Gave the room a fleeting serious glare. " Ok. So listen up then."
"Captain."
"I've got in tou-"
"Manuel."
"What is it Ince? Can't you see i'm giving an inspiring captain speech?"
Ince shrugged. " You Repeated yourself."
"Crikey Ince! Seems you caught me there. Now I have to rephrase."
Manuel was just about to rephrase when Ince mentioned that he was also the only other person in the room...
"Well you can't keep a Captain from practicing."
"But as Your First Officer I can keep my captain sane."
Manuel slapped Ince on the back good naturedly. " I prefer you to be not my first officer, but my first mate."
Ince made a flustered hand gesture. " Carry on."
"I've got in touch with our engineer, Jaime, and he's bringing three blokes back with him, who might have the potential to be crew members."
Manuel has a sort of hodge podge crew on his ship. He's acually missing a few vital officers. He's hoping Jaime will bring in a few willing members. Hodge podge. . . . Manuel rather likes that word. Hodge podge. He also likes the words Bikkie, Woop Woop, and Dinkey-di.
Him and Ince , They been best mates for a while now he says.
He's pretty close with all his crew xept this new doctor bloke hes got. Rudolph was it? no Barnabas? Tim? Gruffudd. . . . . nah. Fabio maybe?
"Dismissed." Manuel started toward the turbolift.
Ince started the RIGHT way toward the turbolift. ( Manuel hasn't had this ship for very long mind you. . . . New design . . . or thats his excuse anyway. . .)
Manuel corrects his directional malfunction with a quick heel spin and joins his first mate in the turbolift.
Manuel makes his way down toward the shuttle bay to find a strange little ship inside. " What whacker authorized this? I did not authorize this. Who's ship is this?"
Jaime hears his captains commotion and clambers out dragging a strange man who's dragging a bow which is dragging another strange man whos being followed by a fellow with a Chili cheese dog. " Oh Captain Manuel! These are my new friends Stefondro and Tib and Lien. Stefondro rescued me from certain death with this ship he did. Then we went and rescued Tib from certain death. Then we found Lien and I ate his sandwich and we all almost died. And then death itself almost die-"
Manuel held up a hand. " Hold it mate, i'll hear no more. You might give me a clot or something. So anyway did you ever find your bro?"
Before Jaime had a chance to answer Stefondro slapped Lien on the hand " I've told Tib countless times, and now is as good a time as any for you to learn too, That Rev (his bow) does not like to be touched, man handled, or hung off of in that manner. Hands off!" Lien quickly sulked backwards, pulled out huge round bug-eye glasses from his vest, and studied Tibs Chili Cheese dog closley.
Jaime acted as if all this were quite normal " Nope. No bro sightings. But as I said Skip always shows up at some point. I spent about 15 minutes searching for him this time."
Jaimes twin brother Skip went missing a few days ago.
Manuel arched an eyebrow " Wow 15 whole minutes? thats a record. twice as long as usual." Manuel clapped his hands together. " Anyway lets get down to bizzo and integrate these three yobos into the crew. Hooroo then." Manuel turned and left.
Ince was about to follow when he noticed Jamie might not of gotten all of that aussie talk. " Just find them jobs Jaime." He said then quickly exited the shuttlebay.
Manuel plops into his chair on the bridge. Ince sits down in the other. Manuel is silently rubbing his temple when a voice highly desturbs him.
" Sirs, the captains chair is on the left."
Manuel nearly jumps out his seat. "BUGGER Me Dead! Decan! Dang you. . Your so. . . so . . quiet. . .I had no idea you were here . . . Its eerie. . . "
The Vulcan simply stares at their chairs to emphasize his point.
Ince looks around and quickly gets up wondering how he could make such a mistake, although he may have enjoyed being in Manuel's chair a bit too much for his own good. Or anyones own good. " Just breaking it in for you Captain."
Manuel shoots up from Ince's seat " And I was just testing the material on yours Commander. Got to make sure my first mate don't fling out his chair in a crisis ya know. yup seems to be in tip top shape. Now that that's all cleared up, i'll get back to my even tippier toppier shaped chair if you dont mind."
As Ince sank into his own chair he tried to cover up the feeling that somewhere deep down in his dark little changeling heart he secretly did mind.
Then a redheaded bloke swiftly enters the bridge holding a bible in one hand. "Blimey! what a pleasure! to finally meet the captain! It's an honor sir!" He holds out his other hand.
Manuel fist bumps his open hand " Ah G'Day, you must be doctor uh . . . Mo was it?"
" Rupert sir. Rupert Broderick!" Replies the doctor with a british accent and a huge smile. He gives his fist bumped hand a perplexed look.
" Ah yes ofcourse! Doctor Rodey."
"Rupert sir" The doctor corrects still marveling and smiling at his hand. The captain actually touched him! Praise the LORD! He hugs his bible tightly to his chest
" Oh yeah sorry. Im not good with names." Manuel leans close to Ruperts face and squints."I'm more of a face kind of guy."
Rupert hugs his bible closer and looks deep into his captains plain as plain can be, lame brown eyes and studys them like a creeper. Yep he can tell his captains a good one. The Lord gives him these feelings.
Suddenly the ship jerks violently and they smack faces harshly. Rupert falls backwards, bible flinging out of his hands to land on Decans pilot controls. " Ah my nose! My nose!Lord help me! I broke my nose!"Rupert screeches through the bridge.
Manuel rubs his forhead vigorously in hope the pain will subside.
" Decan! How many times have we told you not to practice your dance routines with the helm!" Ince shouts over the commotion.
As suddlenly as it happened everything stops. Except for Ruperts whimpering.
"Sorry." Decan apologizes.
Manuel holds up a hand. ( the one he's not holding his throbbing head with) " Wait wait wait wait. Wait just a darn minute. You mean to tell me that's all it really was? there is no emergency and you accidentally broke poor Ralphs nose for no reason?"
"It's Rupert sir" Rupert gorans from the floor, blood running down his face.
"Yes. I got careless. A tune hit me. It could not be helped." Decan carefully picks up the bible and drops it next to Rupert. A page crumples.
Rupert gasps "Sacrilege!"
"Unnacceptable behaviour Decan! What do you call that behaviour on my bridge!" Manuel yells strictly
"Freestyle. . . ? *Awkward silence*. . . . and you are not spelling behavior right, it is B-e-h-"
Decan is silenced with a look.
Suddenly Stefondro,Jaime,Lien and Tib come running in. "Reporting for du-" Stefondro stops suddenly when he sees Ruperts face. " Oh ugh what did that to your nose!?A steam roller!?Concrete mixer?!"
" My Forehead happened, thats what." Manuel crisply replys" Now help Bluey to sickbay."
Tib helps Rupert up, leaving a butter stain on his sleeve, and enters the lift with him. You hear a faint "It's Rupert" and then another faint " Did you say chicken parm?"while the doors slide shut.
Stefondro takes his new place as cheif of security " One heck of a forehead." He mutters to himself.
Lien takes his new place at science.
Manuel looks around at everyone and congratulates them on their new crew membership, until he looks at Decan.
" We're all mates here. I'm gonna let you off easy this time."
Decan looks puzzled. " We are certainly not mates sir. I would prefer a mate of the female species if-" Decan stops talking once he hears lots of snickering around him and some loud sighing and groaning from the captain.
Manuel finally couldn't help but chuckle too. " This captain stuff can really wear a guy out, you reprimand him Ince."
Ince glared daggers at Decan and starts morphing into a horrid monstrous form with blood and fangs and terrifying things " IF YOU EVER DARE DEFY THE ORDER OF THINGS SO HELP ME ILL RIP YOU T-"
Manuel quickly intervened " Alright alright!" Ince quickly morphed back to himself. "Okay um Ince you need to work on that. Like alot. Maybe forever I dont know. just improve alright?"
"Just having some fun captain."
"Thats the spirit! Now lets see what adventures we can find out there!"
Jaime not knowing quite what to do with himself picks up the abandoned bible and starts reading.
