Tu Es Mon Coeur

Disclaimer: Blame Isayama.

Warning: Feels. Eruri. Major Character Death.

This is a big ole' fuck you to chapter 60 and the result of a lot of eruri feels I've been having lately so here have ALL OF MY FEELS. You should totes listen to this eruri playlist I made if you wanna hop on the Feels Train: /inth3end/this-eruri-love

You Are My Heart

Days passed since the last time he saw those sky-blue eyes. On the outside, Levi was still the strong, calm, take-no-bullshit leader everyone came to know and love. But on the inside, he was screaming.

When Erwin turned himself in to the Military Police, Levi cursed him, calling him a fool. He was angry, because he knew what it meant. He knew what would happen. The inevitable end.

Erwin would allow them to take his life, make himself into a martyr for the people, and start the revolution toward true freedom. He would make the ultimate sacrifice, no longer sending soldiers to their deaths against an enemy outside of the walls, when he could start a war with the ones inside.

Levi couldn't watch him go. He didn't meet his gaze, didn't return his soft touch. His fists clenched by his sides, teeth grinding together behind unyielding lips. He knew he would fall to pieces if he looked Erwin in the eye. He would fall to his knees, begging and pleading, clinging to the Commander like a child. Neither of them could bare the indignity, yet both wanted so desperately to just drop all pretenses and feel for once. Levi wanted to be vulnerable in his arms, and Erwin wanted to rely on someone else's strength for once.

Now I'm stuck with these brats, trying to keep them alive. I don't even know how I'm still alive without you by my side, Erwin. How did I let this happen? Why did I let you go?

Levi cursed himself now. If it wasn't for his pride—always his damn pride—Erwin would be tied up in his room where he couldn't play the hero and get himself killed. He could've reasoned with him—him, who knew the entire dance while Levi was still struggling to keep up. Yeah right. Erwin would've gone, one way or the other, because that was what he wanted. It was all part of the plan.

Levi hated the plan. He hated this feeling, this tightness in his chest, the thought of his last moment with Erwin consisted of a few curt words and barely contained rage beneath the surface of his skin. He wished he would've at least kissed the man goodbye.

Goodbye…

The word caught in his throat and he tensed. He knew Hanji could see it. The kids were oblivious, too wrapped up in their own horrors, but his only other friend new what lie behind the mask of his face. He was fighting, dying inside, trying to keep himself together, trying to control his expressions so they wouldn't know, wouldn't see right through him.

The encounter with Kaney made it worse. The nightmares that man induced made Levi nauseous. Erwin, somehow, always found a way to soothe his frayed nerves when he woke up screaming Kaney's name. But now Erwin was gone.

No, not yet, not completely. There's still a chance, still time…

That's what kept running through his mind. It tortured him, thinking of ways to get Erwin back, of stopping this madness before it began. He wanted to leave these kids behind and march on the Military Police Headquarters. He wanted to rip open their throats, slash them to pieces, and tear Erwin from their grasp.

When he was silent like this, lips set in a grim line, eyes staring but unseeing, hands gripping the table or his cup or something, Hanji knew what he was thinking.

"We can't go back now. We're all wanted, we'd just be walking into their trap. Erwin knows what he's doing, just stick with the plan."

"I know." He answered. But Hanji could hear the pain in his voice.

"He wouldn't want you to do anything reckless…"

"I know."

"You know he would be angry with you…"

"I know."

Hanji smiled, chuckling. Levi glared. "You're going to do it anyway, because you're just like him. You both do what you want, and fuck all the rest of us."

"Why are you so happy about it?" he grumbled.

The eyes behind those glasses flashed as Hanji grinned. "Because I'm going to help you. We all are."

Levi blinked. "Is it that obvious that even those kids can tell?"

"Your face is always so blank, it's like a curtain. It shields the worst part, but we still know what's there on the other side. Eren even made the comment that it looks like you're always internally screaming. It scared him." Hanji laughed again.

Levi stood, fists tight. "Then what are we waiting for?"

Levi wasn't a fool. He knew the Military Police would be expecting them, or something like this to happen. They also knew Levi wouldn't hesitate to chop down every last one of them as if they were titans. He did it before, and he would do it again.

His Survey Corps cloak and jacket were discarded in favor of his white shirt, rolled up to his sleeves and open at the collar. He looked the same as he did when Erwin captured him all those years ago in the Underground.

After all, if you were going back to your roots, the first thing to return to was your clothes. The others were better disguised, hiding their maneuver gear, scattered amongst the crowd. Levi stood out, openly challenging the Military Police lined up on the gallows.

Erwin stared right at him, one arm tied behind his back by a rope around his waist, neck waiting for the noose. Hanji was right, he looked a bit angry at his Captain's interference.

Levi smirked at him.

This is what you get for being a little shit, Commander.

Kaney stepped up, all grandiose and leering. Levi stared through him, only leaving Erwin's gaze to pay attention to the enemies around him.

"Come to join the Commander? If you turn yourself in, maybe you can hang together." He sneered.

"If you can catch me. Unfortunately for you, the only man who could is about to be hung." Levi replied.

Behind his back were two blades. Daggers were hidden along his body, and guns too. His squad was also heavily armed after looting a nearby Military Base the night before. He was prepared to strike at any moment and take them all down with him, so long as Erwin made it out alive.

Of course, if they both died here, at least they would die together.

Erwin's eyes seared into his, as if ordering him to stand down. In this, Levi would be disobedient. He couldn't—wouldn't—let Erwin die like this. Not here, not now. He could be angry and yell and punish him later, if it made him feel better.

"Heh, cocky as ever, I see. He didn't tame that feisty streak in you, just put a leash on it." Kaney said.

"And you cut the leash." Levi said, low and dangerous.

Kaney had the gall to laugh. "You don't frighten me. Remember who I am."

"Oh, I remember, Kaney." Levi felt for his blade at the small of his back, fingers meeting cold steel. "That's why you're first."

He moved quickly. They didn't expect him to be so foolish as to charge forward. Even Erwin had a flash of surprised panic in his eyes as Levi dove for Kaney, colliding with his stomach and sending him backward. His blade whipped around swiftly, and just like that the man who starred at the center of every night terror was bleeding out before him, throat open and gushing.

It took the others a few seconds to realize what happened, but by then Levi was already moving to his next targets. He was heading straight for the gallows, hacking through whoever stood in his way. Civilians were screaming, who previously encircled him to stare at the fallen Humanity's Strongest. Now they fled.

He cut down two other men before the Military Police could put together some semblance of a counter attack. He was caught from behind, feet leaving the ground, and thrust his head back, catching the soldier in the chin. His feet came down hard and kicked backwards. Turning, his blade slashed across the man's chest.

Shouts did little to distract him. He was focused on the men standing near the noose. They were herding Erwin away, back into the headquarters where they thought Levi couldn't get him. But they didn't know the lengths to which Levi was willing to go. They didn't realize he would follow them up to the King's door if that's what it took to drag Erwin back.

One shout, however, caught his attention clearly.

"Levi!"

It was Erwin.

The former Captain glanced at the former Commander, seeing several emotions flitting across his face. Erwin tried to cover them all with anger, trying to appear authoritative, but Levi saw the fear, the devotion, and thinly veiled tears.

In response to his call, Levi flew onto the platform and jabbed one of the men who were attempting to lead Erwin away.

He stopped when a rifle was shoved into the side of Erwin's head. One minute he was a whirl of movements, a tornado, and the next he was frozen in place.

"Surrender yourself now!" the soldier pointing a gun at Erwin yelled.

Levi let the full force of his glare fall on the man. He dropped his blades, and they thought he was giving up. Once again, they were mistaken. Once again, he was the one ahead of them all.

He withdrew a gun, and before they could reach for him, pulled the trigger. Brain matter, bits of bone, and blood spewed across Erwin's face. As the soldier fell, the blood congealed and pooled around what was left of his head.

It was then they realized what they were up against. A man who had no fear, no regrets, choosing death over survival, willing to throw it all away to reach his goal. It scared them, the look in Levi's eyes. He wasn't this open since his reign in the Underground.

The Leviathan is back…

It was murmured in the crowd. Some civilians who couldn't escape whispered to each other, and even members of the Military Police breathed his name as a street thug. This was the man they chased, unrelenting, to bring to justice. This was the man who kept escaping, killing off their men with ease and continuing on with business. This was the man who they sent Erwin Smith after. It was not Humanity's Strongest they were facing.

It was Humanity's Demon.

A few soldiers around him backed away, unprepared, but he knew better than to think this was the end. It was time.

There was a flash of lightning, steam billowing in the air around them, and the unmistakable sound of Eren's titan roar. The soldiers scattered, chasing after the bait. That was when the others came out of hiding, appearing out of windows and flying down from the roof, surrounding the soldiers who stayed behind. Some were with Eren, guarding him and taking out the Military Police who went after him.

"Erwin." Levi finally spoke to him, uttered his name, in what seemed like eons. "Come with me." he reached out to him, but Erwin pulled back. His hand halted between them.

"What are you doing?" the blond whispered furiously. "You're going to get them all killed. You could've died, Levi."

"Erwin."

"No, Levi, you don't understand. This is the plan, it's always been the plan. Why won't you just listen to me for once!" Erwin yelled.

"Shut the fuck up, Erwin Smith." Levi growled. That got the former Commander's attention. His mouth hung open, eyes wide, until his jaw snapped shut and he glared at Levi who was untying his one arm. The shorter man grabbed the taller by his shirt collar and pulled him close. "You listen to me now. I don't care what shitty plans you made, or what ideas you think you have. You're coming with me, willingly or not. If I have to carry you out of here, I will."

"I'm going to—," Erwin began.

"Punish me later, yeah, I know. I'll let you bend me over the desk and spank me senseless, just come on."

Erwin was speechless again, but this time he remained silent. Confusion was still in the air as his squad fought off the Military Police. Eren's roar resounded throughout the area, and Levi glanced over. They were running for the exit, almost free.

Hanji swooped down beside them. "You got him! Nice moves, Levi."

"Thanks." He muttered, making sure Erwin was still following. He didn't look too pleased, but there was a proud gleam in his eyes. The three burst through the gates and made it out of the courtyard. Horses were ready for all of them as the rest of the squad started to pull back.

"Armin, go get Eren and the others." Levi ordered. The smaller blond nodded and swung away, heading in the titan's direction. The earth shook as the titan shattered buildings, charging after soldiers who tried to escape.

"I'm…impressed." Erwin stated.

"Don't be impressed just yet, we're still not out of it."

"Clever. I didn't think you'd plan this far ahead. I didn't think you'd plan at all."

"I didn't, Armin and Hanji came up with this. Well, Eren's part and their ambush, at least. I already knew I would be coming in with blades out, killing as many as I could to get you back safe." Levi snorted.

Erwin was quiet for a moment, but Levi knew it was coming. "You killed Kaney."

"Yeah."

"I'm proud of you." He whispered.

"Hush. I'm trying to save your idiotic ass." Levi grumbled, feeling the cracks in his armor. He was still all raw emotion and unrestrained anger, adrenaline pumping and pushing him forward. He couldn't allow any romantic or sad feelings to interfere, or he would slip up and they would all be dead.

Their horses pounded down the roads, scattering civilians in the streets. A few soldiers followed behind, but the kids were right on top of them, dispatching them before they could get to the three below.

"We're getting close to the rendezvous point." Hanji noted.

"Let's hope they made it." Levi replied.

It wasn't long until they arrived at a convergence point and saw the rest of the squad. Mikasa and Armin were helping Eren, fresh from his titan form. They dropped down to a few more horses waiting for them and followed the group out of the city.

They kept going, never stopping, getting rid of any soldiers they encountered on the way.

It was sunset by the time they reached their hideout. Some of the kids were mildly injured during the escape attempt, so they started tending to wounds once the horses were taken care of. Levi led Erwin to an empty room for him to sit and started searching him for injuries.

"Levi."

"Shut up."

"Levi."

Levi looked up, finally meeting his gaze. It was a tense moment before Erwin leaned forward, capturing Levi's lips with his own. Still raw, still so open, Levi moaned into his mouth, melting at his touch. He was pulled close, into Erwin's lap, his good arm wrapped around his waist and holding him in place.

"You were a fool for doing that." Erwin whispered against his lips.

Levi shuddered. "But I'm your fool, and we're both alive, so fuck me already."

Erwin smiled, kissing him again, his hand going up the back of Levi's shirt. He felt a blade. "How many did you have on you?" he asked with a small chuckle.

"As many as it took to get you back." Levi answered. His eyes told Erwin all he needed to know, said everything Levi couldn't. The desperation and need in his lips let Erwin know exactly what Levi was thinking, the way his body trembled, hands clung and tugged at his hair, teeth scraping against his jaw…

Levi was always adept at speaking through body language, and Erwin was fluent enough to read him like a novel.

He fell back against the bed, Levi on top, rolling his hips but never moving to take off his pants. They kissed every inch of skin they could reach in that position, moaning and sighing and hugging each other close. Levi found himself whispering Erwin's name like a prayer. Erwin chanted Levi's name like a mantra.

"Tu es mon coeur." Levi whispered against the shell of Erwin's ear. You are my heart. They were the most honest words he ever spoke, and Erwin knew how much he meant to the former Captain for him to admit something so sweet, so pure.

Soon they were skin against skin, because hunger could only be put off for so long. They were alive now, together again, and they wouldn't waste this opportunity. Who knew what tomorrow would bring?

So for tonight, they took turns congratulating each other on their survival. Levi didn't comment on the fact that it took such a near-death experience like this to finally get his dick inside of Erwin, but he didn't complain when he laid beneath the former Commander, screaming his name. His fingers clawed down Erwin's back, leaving deep scratches, and Erwin's teeth left indents on Levi's collarbone and the tender flesh of his neck.

Erwin always knew the sensitive area of Levi was the inside of his thighs, and it only took one flick of his finger to send Levi keening. He wasn't holding back anymore, he couldn't. All his strength was left on the battlefield when he fought off those pigs. He wanted Erwin to hear just how much Levi would have missed him, just how bad it would have been had the Commander died.

In turn, Erwin murmured in Levi's ear all the praises he never allowed himself to give. He told Levi how scared he was, how badly he wanted to be rescued, his doubts about marching to his own death. And he made it clear how much he would've missed Levi as well, simply by letting Levi take control and mount him.

It was dark by the time their energy was spent enough to stop their lovemaking. They held each other close, Levi cuddling into Erwin's chest, the good arm across his shoulder.

"I love you…" Levi whispered, not for the first time that night.

"I love you too…" Erwin replied, repeating their call and response. The words echoed around them.

Their bodies ached, sore and tired, but they were in each other's arms and alive. That was all that mattered, all they cared about. In the morning they would worry about the consequences of their actions and face the beginning of a new world. For tonight, they didn't have to hide or restrain themselves from saying 'I love you' as many times as they wanted, making up for all the moments they missed before.

At least, that's what he saw as the noose was being slipped around Erwin's head, tightening around his neck. His imagined escape took place between the time the rope snapped taut and Erwin's feet quit twitching to merely dangle a few feet from the ground.

Levi dropped to his knees. His limbs were numb, but his chest ached, burning and pounding. He breathed in sharply, eyes widening as he felt a wetness on his cheeks. The crowd around him was already dispersing, people muttering about the once great Commander and something about how the mighty have fallen. Erwin's name was whispered all around him.

He stayed long enough to watch them lower him into a cart. Before they could wheel him away, he shot forward, clutching the cart and staring down at the lifeless body within. If they recognized the broken man before them, the soldiers said nothing.

Levi threw himself over Erwin's body and allowed himself to sob. "Tu étais mon coeur."

You were my heart.

Author's Note: You had to see that coming if you've ever read anything by me before this, especially from this series. Also, my passé composé sucks so just…if I mistranslated the last part let me know and I'll fix it. I never know when to use être over avoir.