Chapter 1

There it was, lying on the bed next to her. The white silk with light ruffles scattered across it, it reminded her of spring, of the blooming cherry trees that filled the air with a sweet scent that seemed to leave echoes of new beginnings in her lungs. There was another scent that haunted her and refused to leave. It kept her awake at night when she gazed at the stars that illuminated the empty streets, it was never quite there, but still, it seemed like it always made its way back to her.

Her favorite scent.

The day, as much as she dreaded it, had finally come. This day would put an official end to everything she knew and loved. To whom she loved. Hiyori's parents had been quite strict with their decision – she would not inherit the family business unless she married a man that her parents found "decent". So, this was the day she would throw away her life for the sake of her parent's will. It was decided. It seemed like the right thing to do.

A sweet smell lingered lightly in the room.

The day was warm, sun shining slightly through the tree branches. Hiyori felt like the sun was mocking her with its fake warmth spreading through her drapes, blinding her with the bright light. She waited for storms, tornadoes, earthquakes – anything that would make this day disappear. But it was unmistakably here. Reluctantly, she got up from the warmth of her bed and looked at herself in the mirror. She was met by an image of a once smiling, happy girl replaced by a woman that had lost her true meaning of life. No, it was worse, it had been taken away from her. They had forced her to do this. There was only one person in the whole wide world that she would give up everything for, but he wasn't going to save her now.

Yato – her god of fortune.

Yato found the view unsettling. The sun was disturbingly bright. It only burned the wounds cut deep into his very being over the past few months, it made them deeper and larger. It seemed as if nothing was left of his joyful self. He had a hard time keeping up with all the rushing thoughts that ran through his brain every second. They were unpleasant, to say the least.

If only he could do something.

After a moth of fighting with himself over the decision whether to attend Hiyori's wedding or not, he had decided that even the slightest doubt was selfish. Of course, he would go. She wanted him to be there so he would never dare to disappoint her. But he couldn't deny that it hurt like crazy – like his insides were being ripped apart and he wasn't entirely wrong – they might not have been his insides, but his soul was definitely not doing so well. If he was being honest, it wasn't a completely foreign feeling for him.

Yato had had to deal with a feeling of doom for all his life, but never before had it hurt just this much. He had gotten used to the fact that people didn't notice him, didn't acknowledge his existence, and never wished to him. Hell, the five yen bottle he carried around served as a reminder that sometimes, some rare times, people actually needed him. It didn't matter what for, he just longed for the sense of belonging, being valid. People were painfully temporary – he knew that, it was just the nature of human beings. He had always been a prisoner of existence, floating through the infinity of time for ever and ever. But for the first time, the reality of it all came crashing down on him all at once.

If only life wouldn't have to be this hard.

That's why he had decided not to interfere with Hiyori's decision. He respected her and believed that it would be the best for her. She would soon forget about the god of calamity and live a happy life – run the hospital, have children… Yato prayed that he would vanish from existence at that point – life was not worth living if he couldn't have her by his side.

He was going to attend the wedding. No matter how hard it would be – he was going to make it, to show his unconditional love for her. A love that was not allowed, it had never been allowed, but it felt so right, but then again, everything that was potentially tragic had a bittersweet pull to it.

If only this was a nightmare that he could destroy by opening his eyes to meet the sunshine.

Except this time, the sunshine was blinding.