sasuke's... thing?!

summery: the real reason behind sasuke's betrayal

"talk"

'thinking'

"jutsu"

A/N: yo! this will be the first thing I've got around to actually posting... good for me
if you read my profile you'll know why. I had this buzzing round my head for a while and finale got some free time so here we are. enjoy

naruto and sasuke are sitting at icharaku's and eating ramen... well, naruto is eating ramen... well, naruto is more like obliterating his ramen, but that's not the point.
sasuke is brooding, as always but naruto noticed he'd been very distracted at practice and when naruto had asked if he wanted to get some ramen, sasuke had accepted?! and actually accepted using real word like "yeah, sure"
not one "hn" in the sentence!!! yep today definitely was a weird day, or maybe sasuke was sick

"naruto?"

naruto looked around, but saw no-one ' huh? must be my imagination'

"Naruto?"

naruto's head whipped round 'I know I heard that one' but there was still no-one but him and sasuke, who was looking
directly at him, no, it couldn't be him, you just had to look at the facts 1)he wasn't called dobe 2) sasuke doesn't speak
unless absolutely necessary.

"y-yeah?" naruto answered hesitantly

"I have found it" sasuke said simply

"found what?" naruto asked, still unsure whether he was really talking to sasuke, the same sasuke who can answer any and all questions with "hn" and that's only if you annoy him enough to actually answer at all.

Sasuke closed his eyes for dramatic effect, he might be exited but that was no reason to loose his image

"The way to gain power"

this caught the blondes attention

"Oh? How?" naruto asked wondering why sasuke would be telling him

"Yes, it was so simple when you look at the most powerful ninja's of the world, they all have..." he paused for dramatic effect "...a thing!"

The blonde swetdropped at that

"Huh?"

But sasuke seemed to have drifted of after that and was in a sort of rant to himself

"Yeah all of them, Jiraya, kakashi even tsunade has a thing-"

At that naruto coughed, choked and sprayed ayame with ramen broth.
After grinning sheepishly and apologising profusely to a sopping wet ayame, who left immediately to change, naruto turned to sasuke

"Um sasuke, I'm pretty sure baa-chan hasn't got a thing, but if you want to go ask her I'll just run to sand village for safety, because I don't want to DIE!"

Sasuke just raised an eyebrow

"What are you talking about? Your always tell her off for having it"

Naruto had to swallow a mouth full of scolding ramen broth in order to not spray a newly changed ayame again

"coughwhat?cough" but then naruto remembered, sasuke didn't have any parents so he wouldn't know about things like this, that explained a lot about how sasuke acted, naruto had the Sandaime to explain it to him. But sasuke, who did he have?
Naruto decided as uncomfortable as it might be for him, he would get a kick out of the reaction of the brooding uchiha when he learned the truth of how things worked.

Sasuke was starting to get pissed of. He had made all these cool declarations of having found a path to power and naruto was just sitting there daydreaming. He was about to poke him to get the attention back on him when
naruto suddenly shouted "I'll do it!" and seemingly pulled two hand puppets from out of nowhere.

Naruto turned to sasuke with a sympathetic look "sasuke..." he said while putting a hand on sasuke's shoulder still with a hand puppet on it. Sasuke looked from the hand puppet to naruto and back again, wondering what in the name of kami he was doing.

"Sasuke..." naruto said again "it's ok, I understand you never had anyone to teach you these things it's why you ignored all your fan girls and why you act so gay... so I'll teach you" naruto quickly shoved the hand puppets under sasuke's nose.

Sasuke was about to hit the idiot in the face when he actually looked at the appearance of the little puppets one had pink hair and a red dress the other had blonde hair and an orange jumpsuit. He wondered how long naruto had kept those with him

"when a mommy ninja-" he indicated the sakura doll"-and a daddy ninja-" he indicated the doll of himself"-love each other very much-"

"I KNOW WHAT SEX IS YOU IDIOT!" roared sasuke

At that the blonde paused
"then why do you think tsunade has a ... thing?"

Sasuke ground his teeth in annoyance

"No, not that type of thing. all the most powerful ninja's have a thing that only they do the most, Jiraya has peeping, kakashi has perverted reading, tsunade has drinking and gambling... my brother has pocky" he spat out the word brother like it was poison

"Pocky?" questioned naruto "he can't like pocky more than I like ramen"

"I once walked in on him masturbating while reading the ingredients on the box" sasuke said

"..."

"..."

"Uh... I don't really know what to say to something like that" said naruto

"hn" said sasuke

They sat in silence for a while, naruto trying to forget the information on itachi he had just learned

"So..." said naruto after failing to wipe his mind of the disturbing fact "what's your...thing... going to be? Being gay?"

"I'M NOT GAY" sasuke yelled at the blonde

"Suuuure" said naruto unconvincingly" with all those fan girls throwing themselves at you, you could have repopulated your clan but you haven't touched any of them"

"I'M NOT GAY" sasuke yelled again

"And don't think that when we accidentally kissed I didn't feel you trying to shove your tongue in my mouth"

"I.AM.NOT.GAY!" sasuke's yells had turned into a high pitched shriek

ayame and naruto just stared wide eyed at the screeching uchiha
sasuke seemed to realised what he was doing and stopped 'if this got out it would loose him his cool brooder image he had worked so hard to get'

"if either of you ever tell anyone I screamed like a girl you'll regret it" he growled, they both nodded dumbly

"I have decided what my thing will be..." said sasuke as he turned to naruto" naruto I need your help, do you trust me?

Completely shocked naruto just nodded words unable to be spoken while his jaw was still on the floor, an uchiha asking for help, he could tease sasuke about this for years.

Sasuke smiled, actually smiled "good" his smile turned more wicked "CHIDORI" he yelled launching his arm at the blondes chest

ayame screamed clutching a ramen bowl to her chest like it was a ninja proof shield

"Aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! My fucking arm! What the hell are you doing teme?" naruto yelled

The only thing the saved naruto was his instincts which told him to move to the side where the chidori pierced his arm

"My thing will be betraying people, I will betray you and go to that paedophile in sound and then betray him and then... I haven't thought that far ahead" said sasuke

"Now hold still" he said as he charged up another chidori

ayame screamed again and started hurling ramen bowls at sasuke with her eyes tightly closed. ducking and dodging ramen bowl after ramen bowl he couldn't get close enough to kill naruto. getting hit more and more with random objects was starting to piss him off he couldn't predict the completely random throws of the ramen girl as even she didn't know where she was throwing them, finally when he had received a chopstick up the nose he snapped

"STOP IT YOU STUPID GIRL! YOU WANT ME TO BETRAY YOU TOO? I'LL DO IT! IM AN UCHIHA, BETRAYING PEOPLE IS IN OUR BLOOD!" sasuke roared

he was about to put an end to this when he heard the sound of doom behind him and approaching fast

"saaaaaaaaaaasuke-kuuuuuuun" it screeched

"Shit" the uchiha cursed, his one weakness had appeared, fan girls

"I'll have to betray you later dobe" he said as he raced off down the road closely followed by a pink blur

"I'm gonna kick your ass you ass-hole" yelled naruto as he turned to leave the ramen hut then hesitantly turned back to his ramen his left arm flopping around uselessly, it could wait until he finished his bowl of ramen at least.
he finished his bowl and turned to leave then stomach rumbled, maybe just one more bowl... another sixteen bowls later naruto raced off down the street his left arm still flapping around.

ayame sighed she could understand now why her father wouldn't let her date ninja, they were all crazy

A/N: well that's it. what ya think? good? bad? let me know.